4crows

[4crows]

currently running the Sweetie Pie Challenge where i dont hit anyone with a tire iron as hard as i can for seven days

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This may be the worst use of LLMs anyone has attempted, ever. Up there with recognizing mushrooms.

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the answer

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honestly? can I be real? We should have been making shiver fishing jokes the whole time. Tri-stringers ARE modified fishing rods. That’s probably their own stringer that got busted somehow. Better late than never but we missed out on so much time

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You have my full permission to be weird and inappropriate at me

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i love you front facing coelacanth :]

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so i wore a pride flag pin to work the other day and the kids were all interested (obviously) (find me a classroom of preschoolers who are not obsessed with rainbows) (i'll wait) so they crowded around to see.

"aww!" they said, "it's a flag!!"

but the thing is: they're little. a lot of them don't really have a handle on all their mouth sounds yet.

such as, notably, that tricky tricky "L" sound.

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He means a little squeeze bottle with brine shrimp inside but… bottle feeding the loblings…

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ppl who celebrate fictional character birthdays are annoying pass it on

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woah I’m actually done????

there’s a good lesson here notorious procrastinators should never volunteer to hand-draw 52 unique playing cards 

also they’re animated gifs right now because that’s how they’re formatted on the photoshop files and I’m not in the mood to separate them yet. 

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dino saurs were not scary monsters they were mamas with eggs and when they drank water they were like fuckk yessss waterrrr

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aoi doodle i made bc i wanted to picture her on a flight. bc i was on a flight !!

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I know that some British people take umbrage at Americans calling the Great British Bake Off relaxing, but it's just because GBBO is such a different kind of stressful from American baking shows.

American baking shows will be called something like "Cupcake Knife Fight", there's horror movie lighting everywhere and dramatic stings every 5 seconds. All of the contestants are shit talking each other and fist fighting over the one single deep fryer provided by production. It will show the judges all whispering to each other at their super villain table overlooking the whole kitchen, and one will be like, "Oh my god. Everyone look at Brenda right now. She's straight tanking it." And it will cut to Brenda, who is running around covered in flour and crying and also bleeding for some reason. Then you get a clip from an interview with one of the contestants, and they're like, "I really need to win this. Without this award money, I'm gonna need to close my restaurant, sell my dad, and live out of my car. AGAIN." Then the giant digital doomsday clock overhead lets out a horrid klaxon, the judges tell half of them that their cupcakes taste disgusting, and one of them gets eliminated and sent to walk down the dramatically-lit shame hallway never to be seen again.

Meanwhile GBBO is in a lovely, brightly colored tent, there are delightful and friendly hosts/jesters there to keep everyone entertained, and all of the B Roll is of like... a bumblebee going into a flower, or a lamb running in a field. And yes, there will be moments where someone will mess up their timing or something, and they'll be looking at their bake through the oven door like, "oh gosh I don't think this will rise in time!" Then they stand up to find Paul Hollywood directly behind them ominously. His creepy whitewalker eyes will glow white, and he'll say something like "the 12th of June. 2035. Drowning." And his eyes will go back to normal and he'll walk away. Then the baker gives a playful grimace to the camera and says "that didnt sound great, did it?". Cut to a sweet looking older woman sipping tea on a stool and she says "oo I do hope that Prue enjoys the taste of my sugary, sticky baps!". Then, at the end, someone gets a gold star for doing good, and the loser of the episode gets in the middle of a giant group hug. You see all of them at the end of the series at a giant carnival with their families and the post credits informs you that all of the contestants have become a Partridge Family-style traveling band and stayed friends forever.

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my extremely powerful long chip (utahraptor toe claw for reference)

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I dueled a wasp with my katana for 45 minutes and i lost