alien8muse

[alien8muse]

but you see her on instagram and it was never really said that you guys aren’t friends but one day she stopped answering and you stopped texting and it’s not like the wound is a cavern but it is a diagram of what if in red letters. you want to tell her nice lipstick that’s a good color but the last time you spoke it was stilted and awkward 

how do you say goodbye, you know? it’s not an unfriend and block kind of situation. but you watch the people you once loved go on and have a life and you’re outside of it. and it’s bittersweet because of course it’s okay that you’re both thriving. but she used to be who you’d call if you needed to cry. she used to be who’d you’d be binge watching the new series with. you used to be hers, in a way, even if that way wasn’t permanent. and now she’s someone else and so are you and your friendship is clicking heart shapes next to pictures where she smiles next to people you’ve never met. you know where her birthmark is. she knows where you’ve buried your dead.

the poets and the singers and the authors write about romantic love when it ends. but nobody tells you how to get over a friend.

[alien8muse]

~ Перевод поста про опыт аро камин-аута: 

Когда совершаешь камин-аут как аромантик - не добавляя малоизвестных приставок (вроде “ромо-позитивный”) и не используя сложных терминов типа купиоромантик (не испытываешь влечения, но хочешь романтических отношений) - и объясняешь понятие “аромантичность” семье/друзьям, они ведь теперь понимают, да?

Ты говоришь, что аромантична. Твои друзья высказывают поддержку, говорят, что твой опыт важен, что... это ок ненавидеть романтику.

Но я не “ненавижу романтику”?

Друзья начинают говорить о своих влюбленностях и фэндомных шиппах - до тех пор, пока ты не войдешь в комнату.

Что обсуждаете?

Они замолкают. Поворачиваются к тебе.

О, да так, ни о чем, что тебя заинтересовало бы.

Ты смеешься, садишься, они начинают говорить об учебе.

Ты чувствуешь себя одиноко; ты ищешь поддержки в аромантичном сообществе - кого-то, кто разделяет твои чувства и твой опыт. Наконец-то поговорить с кем-то, кто понимает.

Просыпаются сомнения.

Почему я ничего не сказала? Почему не объяснила, что…

Романтика для меня - необязательно что-то плохое. Романтика может быть прекрасной. Я тоже хочу романтики.

Думаю, это все из-за того, что они “уже поняли”. Те друзья, которые знают о моей идентичности; знают, что я, кто я,

Ведь так? Что я вообще знаю?

Ты делаешь шаг назад, ты анализируешь то, что сказала при камин-ауте, как объяснила части идентичности, которая тебе подходит.

Ты сказала - “аромантична”. Аромантичность - важная часть твоей идентичности, но это далеко не все.

Ты никогда не говорила о том, как тебе нравится идея романтических отношений, как тебе нравятся романтические линии в сериалах и книгах, но о том, как тебе нравятся сюжеты про нахождение новой, некровной семьи, как тебя раздражает, когда романтику подают так, как будто на ней свет клином сошелся.

Ты повторяешь, что романтические отношения не должны быть самой важной вещью в жизни, что парочки в старших ��лассах часто распадаются после окончания школы.

О том, что Дню святого Валентина уделяют слишком много внимания.

Нужен день платонической любви.

Твои друзья смеются,

“Не переживай, получишь свою аромантичную валентинку.”

“Было бы круто!” - ты тоже смеешься. Но и получить романтичную валентинку тоже было бы неплохо.

Возникает чувство, будто ты предаешь свое сообщество.

Почему я так себя чувствую? Почему иногда меня бесит романтика? Почему я хочу романтических отношений, хотя они очевидно не для меня?

Внутри тебя - противоречия.

Ты не можешь чувствовать романтического влечения, но почему-то хочешь его для себя, хочешь быть в таких отношениях, хочешь быть как та парочка на улице или как то, что видела на экране? Части тебя нравится романтика, она думает, что это красиво, но другая часть не устает утверждать, что не стоит ставить романтическую любовь на пьедестал, что платоническая любовь так же важна.

Есть ли кто-то еще, кто чувствует то же самое? Кто разделяет этот опыт?

Ты чувствуешь себя потерянной.

Ты все еще не сказала друзьям; ты не можешь избавиться от мыслей, что нужно продолжать притворяться; думаешь, что, возможно, среди аромантиков никто не хочет романтических отношений.

Чувствуешь себя одиноко.

Но один твой друг знает. Они находят для тебя “купиоромантичность”.

Одиночество слегка отступает.

Кто-то наконец понимает, да?

Да?

Они знают определение. Но оно ощущается… неправильно. Чувствуешь, что ты больше, чем коробочка с названием.

Ты шутишь, “Только представь, никогда не чувствовать романтического влечения?” Они отвечают:

И все равно хотеть отношений.

Должно ощущаться тепло; кто-то наконец-то понимает.

Но этого не происходит.

Слово вертится в твоей голове.

То, что я не чувствую романтического влечения - не патология. Это влияет на меня, на мою жизнь, но это нормально.

Я ценю свой аромантический опыт.

Я все еще не нашла в себе сил совершить камин-аут до конца, но я знаю, что найду их. Где-то существует сообщество, к которому я принадлежу.

Два человека могут по-разному могут испытывать, переживать и описывать свою аромантичность.

Не все аромантики чувствуют отторжение к романтическим отношениям и романтике.

Примите эту идею: ради своих аромантичных друзей, родственников, партнеров, и ради себя.

Есть сообщество, которое меня понимает; есть друзья, которые принимают меня, какая я есть. Мне нужно набраться храбрости открыться им.

И я это сделаю.

An experience.

When you come out, but with only aromantic, not romo-positive/favourable or a lesser known arospec identity that favours romance (cupio, etc), you explain the definition of the term "aromantic" to your friends/family, they now understand, right?

You say your aromantic. Your friends accept you, they say your feelings are valid, that it's okay to "hate" romance.

But I don't hate romance?

The friend group begins talking about their crushes, their fandom ships, until you walk into the room.

What are you guys talking about?

They all go silent.

Your friend turns to you.

Oh, nothing you would be interested in.

You laugh, sit down, they start talking about what they did in their last class period.

You feel alone, you turn to the aromantic community to find acceptance, someone who will understand what your feeling, someone who has had a close experience, someone who will finally understand.

You question yourself.

Why didn't I say anything? Why didn't I explain that I think~

Romance might be good. Romance is beautiful. Romance is something that I want.

I think it's because they already "understood." The friends that I am out to know what I am, who I am,

Right?

Do I even know?

You take a step back, you look at what you have said as you have come out with the parts of the identity that you are comfortable with.

All you said was aromantic.

Aromantic is an important part of your identity, but it's not all of it.

You never talk about how much you love the idea of romance, how much you love watching tv shows and books with romantic plots and subplots, but you talk about how much you love found family plots, how annoyed you get when it seems like EVERYTHING has to be about romance.

You talk about how a romantic relationship shouldn't be the most important thing, it shouldn't be held on a pedestal, and you talk about how relationship in high school will never last.

You talk about how you think valentines day is overrated.

There should be a platonic love day too.

Your friends laugh,

"Don't worry, I'll get you an aromantic valentines day card."

"Yeah that would be cool!" You laugh too. But a romantic valentines day card wouldn't be bad.

You feel like your betraying the community.

Why do I feel this way?

Why am I annoyed by romance sometimes?

Why do I want this certain relationship when I obviously wasn't meant to have it?

You feel conflicted.

You cannot feel romantic attraction, but you wish for it, you want to be in that relationship, you want to be a part of a couple walking down the street, or like something you see on a tv show, but who?

A part of you loves romance, you think it is beautiful, but another part of you thinks that it shouldn't be held on such a high pedestal, that platonic love is just as important.

Is their anyone else who feels this way? Anyone out there that has had these experiences?

You feel hopeless.

You still haven't told your friends, you feel like you have to keep up an act, you think you might be the only romance-favourable aro out there.

You feel alone.

One of your friends knows. You have them your Tumblr, they researched the word "cupioromantic".

You feel less alone.

Someone finally understands, right?

Right?

They know the definition. But it feels wrong. You feel like your more than the definition.

You make jokes around them.

"Imagine being able to feel romantic attraction."

They counter back,

Yeah, but you want a relationship anyways.

It should feel nice, somebody finally knows, understand.

But it doesn't.

The word sticks in your head. "Anyways."

My lack of romantic attraction is not an ailment. I'm affected by it, but it is not an ailment.

I am proud of my aro experience.

I haven't found the courage to come out fully, but I will, I will.

There is a community where I belong, somewhere.

Everyone experiences their aromanticism differently.

Not every aro is romance-repulsed.

Accept that for your aro friends, and for yourself.

I am not alone.

There is a community, I have friends that will accept me for who I am, I just have to find the courage to tell them, and I will.

I will.

[alien8muse]

aro flag concept mistake

so apparently the color green was chosen for aromanticism because red is the color of romance and green is the opposite color of red. except… it’s not. this is due to a misconception of primary and complementary colors etc etc (i talk abt this at theend of the post, or just check wikipedia’s article on complementary colors for simplified proof.) the correct opposite color of red is cyan, sometimes colloquially called light blue. im NOT suggesting the aro flag be replaced or changed in any way, but heres what it would look like if the person who made the aro flag knew their stuff:

(the differences: 2 is the standard variant of the cyan aro flag i just made, 1 is slightly saturated so it’s a bit more calm, and 3 is a little more green than the other 2.)

again, IM NOT TRYING TO REPLACE the aro flag. i just thought it would be cool to see the flag that could’ve been. it looks kinda cool and i like it a little more than the standard aro flag. green seems so washed out but this reminds me of ice and fresh water? pls tell me what u think. feel free to use with credit and reblogs would b dope! 

((if you think red and green are complementary colors, this is what is taught in grade school due to a combination of gross oversimplification and discrepancies in the english language. complementary colors are ACTUALLY based on cones in our eyes - there are three types of cones that respond best to to the wavelengths for colors red, green, and blue. (this is also why red, green, and blue are the OBJECTIVE best primary colors.) if the eye sees pure red light, the red cone will be activated, and blue and green cones will NOT. to see the OPPOSITE of red light, it would switch; so green and blue cones will be activated, while the red cone is not. an even mix of green and blue light results in cyan. thus, cyan is the opposite color of red.))

[alien8muse]

ADOPTION FUN FACT

If you’re adopted internationally into the United States, BY adoption LAWS you’re legally a citizen, but you still have to apply for documentation and if it’s not done by the age of 18 you have to pay over $500 and get a judge to reopen your adoption case. 

Even More Fun Fact: No one actually tells adoptive families, this so many find out after they’re 18 when their kid needs to get a passport, wants to apply for financial aid, get certain jobs, vote or some other shit that requires proof of citizenship and now it’s too late because they’re 18 or over. 

AND EVEN MORE FUN FACT! You can sometimes even be deported because you can be considered foreign-born, non-citizens! 

Oh and they won’t accept adoption papers or a birth certificate as proof. 

Adoption is FUN. 

[alien8muse]

The Doctor totes has a crush on Rory.

HE TOTALLY DOES OKAY

look

at

this

these

two

sexually-repressed 

idiots

and the crowning jewel 

i thought these two were just cute friends at first but now i’m sobbing at three in the morning over fanfiction about these bloody morons and it was only supposed to be a crack ship how did i ruin my life so much

[alien8muse]

It's revealing to see exclusionists completely ignore the asexual manifesto being made in 1972 (made almost 50 years ago!), and continue to misdefine and purposely demonize asexuality as a whole.

They even mention the obvious meaning behind what asexuality is:

• Not about being """pure"""

• Not a choice

• NOT MEANT TO VILLIFY PEOPLE WHO ARE SEXUAL

• Relating sexually to no one, but also includes libido being natural, and masturbation being normal

This has been written by and for the asexual community for decades. Claiming that asexuality is a trend, or is fake, or is just a new random term is clearly being ignorant at best, and bigoted at worst.

"B-but what about them being LGBT(Q+)?"

The "Off Our Backs" activists back in the 70s had included asexual people in their promotion of choosing a label for yourself rather than society doing it for you (image above).

Myra Johnson's essays and papers in "The Sexually Oppressed" talks and includes asexual women and their harassment. She also has written about the lack of representation and acknowledgement of asexuality as a whole, published in 1977. This essay was included with many sexualities in this documentation of sexuality as a whole.

Toby, an alias for Jim Sinclair, was interviewed at the time for being androgynous and "nonsexual", and was repeatedly harassed for it once his coworkers found out, forcing him into hiding. The interview took place in 1989.

New York's "Sexual Orientation Non-Discrimination Act" is still the only piece of legislation in the world that includes and mention asexuality, which was passed only in 2002.

Articles, polls, essays, research into asexuality has been piling up over the decades of asexual history, only now to be denied by people who aren't even old enough to be there?

Hundreds of accounts of abuse, trauma and sexual assault based on the victim being asexual are passed off as misogyny by apologists, and easily speak over victims. Is this ok behavior just because someone is asexual? Even if misogyny is a reason for abuse, is intersectionality nonexistent with asexual people?

Doctors and practitioners are downright denying patients medicine because of their orientation, and restrict medicine because of their "fear of developing asexual tendencies" as if it's a disease. Doesn't that sound familiar?

Asexual people have been cast aside and thrown into the back burner for far too long. It isn't a game to debate people out of existence. It isn't funny to invalidate and harass a marginalized orientation. You don't actually care about LGBT+ ace people if you're actively making fun of them.

We need to stand strong together. When we focus on tearing each other down for not "being oppressed enough", we lose sight on actively fighting off groups that will kill us, regardless if we're lesbian, gay, bi, trans, ace, queer, etc. When that starts happening, they won't care what labels we're using.

Will you?

[alien8muse]

“I’m faced with an impossible decision.” s01e09, She-Ra

Why is the Queen calling it an impossible decision? “Exchange yourself for your daughter,” says the Shadow Weaver.

Okay. Great. There are millions of people depending on you, on your command. Yes, she is your daughter and pretty powerful but it won’t be an equal exchange.

Not to mention that YOU CAN’T TRUST THEM. Why would they give your daughter away if they can have you AND your daughter? They are evil, for Someone’s sake.

[alien8muse]

On Glimmer and “you are the one who keeps being weird and leaving” (c) Bow, s01e08 [Ball]

I’ve seen the thing that Glimmer has to deal with their “jealousy” on their own (w/o “taking it out” on people) getting cheers. And I want to say smth about that.

Glimmer was expecting Bow to go with him.

They are mentioning the routine, ”well, there is nothing wrong with the new thing” (c) Bow. Er. Well.

A routine can be kinda very important? Just imagine that, mentally.

Going to social events where there are so many people. You always went with this one person, he is your best friend, you feel safe with him and you know you are going to be okay as long as he is with you. Glimmer mentions they are not good at making friends or at keeping them. They feel that he is going to support them and be at their side... but he takes the first offer he gets to be away from her when they need him?.. It’s gotta hurt.

And it’s probably not doing them any favours in their “trust issues” because their friends left them behind, it’s so obvious.

I think they are right to be afraid, to be honest. Maybe I and Glimmer just share the same issues.

I can easily imagine myself in their place. I don’t even have to imagine much. Maybe I and this person always go to this type of social events together. And then they go with another person - okay. They say they don’t want to leave me behind, why can’t we hang out together. And then I find out myself completely lost and alone. Yes, there are other people but I don’t know them that well.

I’m not comfortable. It’s a new place. There are new people. The only person that brought me any sense of calm and centre before isn’t here. Even though I told him about this being a routine.

This is shit.

Of course, I’m gonna be alright. I won’t have a meltdown. There’s not gonna be an overload. That’s what I’m telling myself sitting in the other corner of the room because there was no place near him and they, of course, didn’t go to search for places that we could all sit together.

I’m probably projecting on Glimmer now. But I was on the verge of tears the last time it happened to me. Well, Glimmer had Adora. And I was texting with my partner the whole time just to survive it.

But... I don’t know.

It’s a shitty thing to do to an autistic person. I have no idea if Glimmer is autistic. But they could be?

And there was no proper warning. At least, it seems like it has been only a few days before the ball.

And there was no proper reason? Okay, okay, he wanted a change, wanted to talk to Perfume and he doesn’t have to suit Glimmer’s needs all the time.

But would you do that to a person that depends on you during social events? Hm. Like, yes, you could. But is it really worth it?

The show won’t probably address it later the way it is now going through my mind, it’s going to go with “jealousy”.

I’m so totally projecting my issues.

Is it really worth it to abandon a person with abandonment issues like that? With no proper warning. Just wave at them saying it’s their routine and that they are not okay with that.

Yeah, absolutely, you can do that and they should take care of themselves. But it’s not what best friends do.

I’d predict a huge hit from abandonment issues? You were going to be in a situation where you don’t feel safe and it’s not seen as serious and whatever, I want a new thing, deal with your own problem yourself. Like, sure, Glimmer could do that. But it also means their closing up? Building more walls around themselves? Your relationships can be damaged.

Bow _knows_ them. And whether they are autistic or not (the routine’s thing importance depends on that; because if they are... this is just shit), Glimmer obviously discussed them keeping-friends issues with him.

Also, him saying that he just wanted them all to hang out together but “you are the one who keeps being weird and leaving” (c). Just a note, that people can have a limit to how many people they can closely interact at the same time or how much energy it takes from them. If Glimmer has similar to mine experience in that department, they would have to waste more energy interacting with more than one (in their case it might be two) person at a time. Especially people they don’t know well.

So, like I said, if Glimmer is autistic and they discussed their experience... *shrugs*

Like I said, from a certain viewpoint, this is shit.

[alien8muse]

???

we’re going to have to call smut ‘lemons’ again, aren’t we? 

[alien8muse]

Protective/Loyal Dialogue Prompts

- “I’ll handle this.”

- “Stay behind me.”

- “If you hurt them…”

- “Get away from them!”

- “Don’t come any closer!”

- “I’m with you to the end.”

- “I’ll carry you if I have to!” 

- “They don’t deserve you.”

- “I’ll always be here for you.” 

- “Tell me who did this to you.”

- “I just want to keep you safe.” 

- “Get your hands off my ____.” 

- “I won’t let them near you again.”

- “I’ll do anything for you. Anything.”

- “You’re safe with me, I’ll protect you.”

- “Don’t you touch a hair on their head!”

- “You touch them again and I’ll kill you!”

- “You don’t have to be scared anymore.”

- “They thought they could get away with this?”

- “It’s over. They’re not going to hurt you again.”

[alien8muse]

not to throw myself into discourse or anything but fandom went downhill the moment fans began holding up fandom content to mainstream content standards 

[alien8muse]

How can someone ground a person who can teleport?..

[alien8muse]

I met his eyes and said, "I killed the things that gave me this scar." He smiled broadly, showing just a hint of fang. "What a lovely coincidence. So did I."

Laurell K. Hamilton, Anita Blake Series, Book 1

[alien8muse]

[alien8muse]

35 and 24

24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes?

Hesitantly scared-excited. 

I can do it and I often come up with setups, like “what if Crowley prefered to be completely passive during sex (a pillow princess of sorts)” or “what if Az had sex toys and Crowley wanted to watch [both ace]”. I talk about them with everyone who listens. I am excited to write them. Then I write pieces that are not smth I meant to write and don’t finish actual ones (to continue examples from above, I have a piece of OC/Crowley where he gets to be a 100% pillow princess and the first chapter of Luxuria posted a month ago).And then I remember that I am asexual & have no relevant sexual experience and stumble, get scared and don’t write them!Yeah, sure, I can ask someone who is not asexual for insights but *khm* most people I discuss fandom stuff with are ace.But if I do write smutty scenes, they tend to be R-rated.

35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest?

Like I said above, I talk with everyone who would listen. 

Well. I talk with my partner if I know he likes&knows the fandom (for example, he was into Good Omens since reading the book). Then I just try talking about it with people I talk regularly who are interested in discussing ff ideas or reading pieces I write.Sometimes I “keep an idea close to my chest” but they tend to get lost and forgotten in there. I tend to share ideas I’m excited about, dialogue drafts, etc.

[alien8muse]

Fanfiction Writer Asks

Most of the writer ask posts I come across are only like ten or so questions long so I thought I’d try to make a longer one because we like talking about our writing! Feel free to reblog!

1) How old were you when you first starting writing fanfiction?

2) What fandoms do you write for and do you have a particular favourite if you write for more than one?

3) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer.

4) What is your favourite genre to write for?

5) If you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi chaptered stories, which would it be and why?

6) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why?

7) When is your preferred time to write?

8) Where do you take your inspiration from?

9) In your xxx fic, what’s your favourite scene that you wrote?

10) In your xxx fic, why did you decide to end it like that? Did you have an alternative ending in mind?

11) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it?

12) Who is your favourite character to write for? Why?

13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why?

14) How did you come up with the title for the xxx? - You can ask about multiple stories.

15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names?

16) How did you come up with the idea for xxx?

17) Post a line from a WIP that you’re working on.

18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them?

19) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to?

20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently?

21) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire?

22) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it?

23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence?

24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes?

25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story?

26) Which part of your xxx fic was the hardest to write?

27) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow?

28) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction?

29) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like?

30) In contrast to 29 is there a story which gets lots of love which you kinda eye roll at?

31) Send me a fic recommendation and I’ll post it for my followers to see! (The asker is to send the rec not the answerer)

32) Are any of your characters based on real people?

33) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?

34) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten?

35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest?

36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s?

37) What’s the funniest story you’ve written?

38) If you could collab with any other writer on here, who would it be? (Perhaps this question will inspire some collabs!) If you’re shy, don’t tag the blog, just name it.

39) Do you prefer first, second or third person?

40) Do people know you write fanfiction?

41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written?

42) Song fic - What made you decide to use the song xxx for xxx.

43) Has anyone ever guessed the plot twist of one of your fics before you posted it?

44) What is the last line you wrote?

45) What spurs you on during the writing process?

46) I really loved your xxx fic. If you were ever to do a sequel, what do you think might happen in it?

47) Here’s a fic title - insert a made up title. What would this story be about?

48) What’s your favourite trope to write?

49) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about?

50) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?