askinginsteadof

[askinginsteadof]

I'll lay in the afterglow

Until the lights go out

And pray in breaths

I hold on to.

After hours waiting, wanting,

Withering beneath your soul

I find the cause to keep on going;

Your words are worth the toll.

[askinginsteadof]

Greed supercedes;

You had a promise,

I'd a death sentence

Etched in stone

From time long gone,

A lasting moan

As a swan song.

I laid my head

In the bed made for me.

My people,

A memory.

[askinginsteadof]

Kisses like splinters

And I'm afraid of infection,

I was another man.

Words of softness said in jest

While a warm hand caress,

I'm chained and I am willing.

Gruesome is the thought

Of the other side

And away that thought will go

By choice,

A bridge I'll cross with my eyes closed.

[askinginsteadof]

Between the wind and the rain,

The sun and the moon,

The sea and the shore,

I found you.

Tracing the line

Around inconsistencies

And basking in the glow

Of prolonged suffering,

Waiting for the moment.

[askinginsteadof]

The wastes grow each day;

Grow bigger,

Grow wilder

And evermore untamable.

I like to run through the fields at night screaming

Warning farmers of death.

The smell of petrol finds its way into my bed sheets,

Giving me dreams of flames and light headedness.

I'm told the drops of oil

I was bred to subsist on

Is far too much

While having no other alternative.

The slaves that made my clothes

Wait, each waking hour, for a painless death.

I am both king and peasant,

Rapist and victim,

Warlord and footsoldier,

Fat off the flesh of my fellow man

Feeding my blood to the machine.

[askinginsteadof]

There were 8 long years

With less than we feared,

An open tale of tragedy

With paid for tears.

Tapping on the window,

Swearing down what we hear.

I can't remember anymore

If it's clouded or it's clear.

[askinginsteadof]

Saw your eyes

As you finally cried,

Your mouth a half-smile

While you tried to laugh,

There's another time for that.

Sink into my arms,

Bury your face

Away from harms way,

I promised to never say

And I never will.

[askinginsteadof]

I want more,

Or maybe I want less,

I'm not sure.

Ill gotten gains

Are all that can exist

On the barren plains.

The lust for life

Is worth a try,

A thousand thousand times.

In the absence of meaning,

Pleasure becomes the God

That we worship each evening.

[askinginsteadof]

I was sad today

Left an impression of my shadow on the wall while staring out the window smoking a cigarette I bummed off a friend who's quit more times than me

Ate chocolate for breakfast and felt ill knowing that would be the outcome but not caring either way

Wished to waste the day away staring at the ceiling only to pace around my bedroom like that would come to any sort of conclusion

I fell into bed after wrestling with a lack of thoughts finally glad to be whisked away to sleep only to be found by a fire I'd not felt all day

Tomorrow I will drink

[askinginsteadof]

Sell me some sadness, please.

Let me cry alone, a single tear.

Have me have a sound release

That nobody will hear.

Make the pain more than the suffering,

Like it's made for more than this.

A fear that I've been shy of uttering,

Like a final wish.

[askinginsteadof]

Bleed anger for me.

Blend passion with a forgotten longing.

Blur the lines between a want and a right.

Empty your mind with a scream,

And endure.

[askinginsteadof]

I feel excitement

Going down the dark country road,

With nothing but old bulb headlights

And green trees at either side to guide me,

Yet I return home with a full tank.

I catch eyes from across the room

And my mind does its best

To take in the face,

Before I quickly look away.

I start running

With the rain on my face,

And the puddles playing painter

On the lower half of my clothes,

Then stop when I hear chatter around the bend.

I sing along to every song,

Just loud enough to not be heard

And when my voice catches the silence,

I decide to laugh.

[askinginsteadof]

I always liked how learning to play guitar leaves callouses on just the tips of your fingers,

Like a biography to be read on sight,

Written by the metal strings that have grown to know your fingers oh so well;

A tattoo earned, not paid for.

How the scars on my friends wrists tell me she has fought and she has won battles she will never talk about,

She knows war

And will do everything in her power

To prevent others enduring the same.

And then there's those

Whose marks are invisible,

Worn on a memory overplayed

And an anger that rises like a fire with free will.

It's hard to know what you've been through and done

But sometimes it feels better to be able to forget.

[askinginsteadof]

Up a bit north of us

Down long winding country roads,

Beset on both sides by evergreen hedgerows

Encroaching so cars pass by more than close,

Is the heart of the land,

Birthplace of the soul,

Where myth becomes legend

And the gods still dine with the stars.

A place you always plan but never go

Because you know it won't be as real

As the stories you've heard all your life.

Just another place waiting

To be bought and sold.

[askinginsteadof]

In yearning, I find a cause;

Bereft of empty hours pondering,

A whole new world I didn't know existed

Unfolds before me

Like the protagonist in the 5th chapter

Of an alright book.

I cling to that desire

Because in a matter of weeks

The memory of it is all I'll have left.

Returned to the frailty

Of wishing for the weekend

As a means to get by.

[askinginsteadof]

Save us from ourselves;

Our heroes have long since died,

Their rusted swords and ancient promises

Now lie locked behind glass

And in books nobody's read.

The hands that crafted this world

Lit a fuse since the beginning,

And we have been fanning the flames

For what feels like eternity.

[askinginsteadof]

I'm crying in advance

So that if the pain may come

I can keep my composure,

I sacrifice the night

So I will have something to say

In the case of such event.

Only a fool would do

That which I choose,

And only the desperate

Would cling to it.