bigfootstolemyweed

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tbh(thinkin bout Halloween)

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fish pipes by lefthandedglass

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Go for it

Worst he can do is say no

Yeah but if he says no then things will get awkward and the whooole vibe of the office will be off. Maybe I should wait a bit longer, build more of a rapport with him.

He seems super chill but also he sort of looks at me funny sometimes, like he just suddenly remembered he doesn't like me. Which is probably all in my head, and he's just, you know, knew and trying to figure out how scary the new boss is.

Still, I don't want to blow my shot...

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Is a week long enough to wait before asking my new employer if he wants to go camping with me and have it not be weird?

Asking for a friend.

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One of my favorite spots to swim and chill

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Yeah, yeah, I’m sure you could. Sounds like you’ve got goo-goo eyes for your new hire though. Who is this guy anyway? Spill the beans since you’re so keen to share details about every little intricacy of your being.

You are making assumptions, anon. I do not have goo-goo eyes for anyone at the moment, but I can recognize objective attractiveness in a man.

I'm sure it's unprofessional to name and then discuss the appearance of a new employee, not that it's really any of your business. He IS handsome, though. Great face, well sculpted jaw, lovely eyes - he's got that spark that usually means "fun but a lot of trouble". Oh, and he is fit, isn't he? He used to be a park ranger, so that does make sense, but I admit that I get weak for a man with toned arms and a firm handshake.

More than anything physical though, it's how he carried himself that really got me. He has confidence, one may dare even call it swagger, and walked into my office with the...well, I'm not sure how else to describe it - the afterglow of a man who has just had mind-blowing sex with a beautiful woman (or partner of any gender, I suppose, but that doesn't quite roll of the tongue). Which isn't to say I assumed his sexual activity, but it's, you know...a spring in the step, a sparkle in the eye, the quirk of the lips, the way he'd absentmindedly run his fingers over his lips as he thought.

As I said, he's not someone I would easily forget. Still, though, he simply is not my type. Handsome, but not someone I'd pick out specifically for myself.

I look forward to working with him, though.

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Testing that theory on yourself doesn’t count, brother.

Alright, fair enough, I'll admit I did walk right into that one.

That said, it has been a while since I actually kept track formally, opposed to just a running tally in my head. I haven't gotten much of a chance to stretch my wings, as it were, since transferring Ohio.

Though if you're volunteering, anon... well, here I am~ I'd be happy to give a demonstration.

😘

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What would you say it is that makes you so unforgettable?

Oh, so now you want to know, is it? Did I pique your curiosity? Do you want to imagine the experience that is Elias Bouchard in the full color, high definition, digitally enhanced special release format?

If only I had the skill - nay, the vocabulary, even - to adequately reproduce every unforgettable, mind-blowing moment of an evening with yours truly in words. I would be able to retire early and live off the royalties from my best selling romance novels.

What about me makes me unforgettable? It is my spark, anon, don't you see? My innate and unrelenting charm, the sparkle in my eyes, the flame on my silver tongue as I show you with precise and unrelenting detail exactly what fires that tongue can light. It is the sensation of my slender fingers taking you apart piece by piece, pulling you apart in puzzle pieces that I memorize and put back together into a new picture - something you couldn't even imagine before laying eyes on me but will forever remain in your memory as a point of reference for why every other man leaves you so disappointingly wanting. It is my perfect intuition, my uncanny ability to know exactly where that itch you can never seem to scratch is and how to ease it.

Really, dear anon, the only thing that you'll be forgetting after an evening with me is your own name after I make you short-circuit.

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Sounds like something a forgettable stoner bottom twink would say

How very dare you, anon. I may be a stoner and a twink (or I was, at least, I may be too old now since I crossed the 30 years mark), and even occasionally a bottom (but who is exclusive in these things, really) but I am absolutely unforgettable.

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Buddy you gotta drink less when you fuck strangers. Or at least cut down on the poppers

Ok, first of all? Rude.

Secondly: It's been a hot minute since I was truly in my slut era, but I always remember the face of a hot hook-up. Always.

I've been around the block more than enough times to know better, anon. Do not underestimate me. Trust me, if I had fucked my new hire before, I would know (and, frankly, so would he. I am not a forgettable lay, I make a point of that).

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Crystal ball bong by cannastyle🙌🔮💜💨

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Interview went great! I honestly ditched the written questions halve through in favor of just having a nice chat with the man. The vibes were immaculate. He was really a delight to talk to, and even was able to answer some of my improvised questions about various cleaning products (apparently he has a roommate that is a bit of stickler about tidiness).

Weirdest thing though: I could not for the life of me shake the feeling that I'd seen him somewhere before. Which - he's a handsome enough man, I feel like I would remember a face like that...I think I do remember a face like that, though when I try to remember where it alludes me entirely. Gave me a bit of a headache, honestly, trying to think about it.

Isn't that odd? It gives the whole situation an air of mystery that I'm really feeling. It's that feeling you get right before something occult happens, you know the one? That sweet, curious anticipation that makes your bones itch.

Call it intuition, but I think the next few months are going to be really fun!

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I wore my most professional suit for my interview today. Clip on tie and everything! I definitely remember how to be a professional boss.

Big man in charge, right here! Sober and everything. Watch out, potential employees, Mr. Bouchard is here!

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doodled an extra shitty comic cuz i didn’t feel like spending time drawing lol

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new heart bong 🫀