brookesmultifandomhell

[brookesmultifandomhell]

TW: loss, depression, toxic family issues under the cut also, not blog related, just kinda a vent post

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One year ago today became one of the worst days of my life. What was supposed to be the start of summer, getting new furniture (we very rarely do that and had to put of necessity, but it was my first time getting reclining couches and a smart tv)

A way of new beginnings in my book….until 4:00 pm…when we got a call from my auntie that my grandpa Jim dad passed away from complications of dementia..

He was more than a grandpa to me, he was a father figure, a best friend, a partner in crime, my first dance teacher, my first self defense teacher. My shoulder to cry on, a protected. He taught me what a real man and father looked like (my dad and I don’t get along at all, we have always had a shitty relationship and I only call him dad because he forces me and will try to cause a fight that sometimes is almost physical). Hell my grandpa was my fucking rock when me and mama (his youngest) would get into disagreements. Without him, I wouldn’t be who I am today…but living life without him now…hurts me to the bone…summers now mean depression spikes, crying myself to sleep every night or damned close to it, being unable to look at pictures without crying…and cursing the world that he was taken before I could say one last goodbye..

Bapa, just know I love you, that you meant and still do mean the world to me, that I miss you everyday and I am who I am because of you. I will never forget you and the love you held for me, and I hope that you’re still keeping me safe from the other side of the veil between spirit realm and the living realm.

I Love you so so fucking much.

(Pictures of him with me when I first came home from the hospital after my birth, approximately 2 days old)

[brookesmultifandomhell]

I always forget how challenging I find doing a sims build for a pack I don't have yet but desperately want 🙃

Currently working on a spa in del sol valley... phhhhew, half the stuff I'm missing I'm substituting and will forget to replace until I play with the spa pack 😭 the other half has no good substitute and is just well...hopefully I remember what I was going for

[brookesmultifandomhell]

Hey all! I have a question for fellow xbox x|s users who may have experience, but what is the best rechargeable battery for the controllers? I'm trying to find some but am completely unsure and our of my element! Any links/help is appreciated (please note, I don't want to go above 40-50 dollars at the most) any non xbox users, feel free to disregard 😁 thank you in advance

[brookesmultifandomhell]

My big sister got me hooked on stardew valley…on top of the sims and my Roblox games 💀 I’m turning into a ‘cozy’ gamer as she would say. Reentering my gamer era for reals over here XD

[brookesmultifandomhell]

I have never been more glad for a cheap $8 stethoscope (not fancy,but actually works) that I had gotten for Halloween in my life. It’s officially gonna be my best buddy, my poor dog has a cold but as long as she doesn’t get worse, at least she’ll be ok (and now gods forbid she needed a vet, we’d know fast)

[brookesmultifandomhell]

Skeet ulrich has taken my heart, locked it in a box and thrown away the key.

I always thought he was handsome, but suddenly I’m like…feral for him 😅

[brookesmultifandomhell]

I so desperately want a switch and animal crossing 😭 I played it back on the ds/3ds and I miss it so bad (and Mario cart back when I had a Wii) but like…..ugh life 😭

Wish I could bring back the games from simpiler times…I also miss webkinz…but I sadly don’t think those are a thing anymore 😭 that game was rad though

[brookesmultifandomhell]

I’m that way with my late grandpa! We used to talk in song lyrics and he had his own way of talking, as we called it, bapa-isims, and while I had always used a few or caught myself associating a few songs with him, it’s increased 10 fold since his death. I now sit like him, hold my cups of coffee like him,dress like him and have pretty much taken on a second life of him. It helps me remember him, and this gave me the perfect wording for what I’ve been experiencing… building a museum of my papa jim 😭 🥺

i love how we pick up habits and phrases and songs from people we love and it sticks with us for so long it becomes a piece of us making us a museum of all the people we've ever loved

[brookesmultifandomhell]

So my late grandpa (I sure miss my bapa Jim 😭) has passed…one of his favorite songs has been stuck quite often (actually, all of them always do, but recently it’s mostly knock three times by Tony Orlando and Dawn) and I have adopted his silly slang/mannerisms and now the need to breath *anything* Tony Orlando and Dawn 😂 🤣 if I write a song fic based on knock three times, I’m blaming my bapa Jim (in a loving way of course)

[brookesmultifandomhell]

I have discovered boop wars causes me to laugh like a maniac bring the boops!!

Reblog if your blog is boopable-safe so you can get all the (probably new) achievements. I don’t care about notes I just want boops

[brookesmultifandomhell]

Cutest birb! 😍 😭 I want it

ravenology1

[brookesmultifandomhell]

One thing about me: I am terrified of clowns, love horror movies… HOWEVER, for horror movies, I think I have a work around for the clowns issue. I tried it with the IT 2019 movie, and again with the terrifier movies. I figured out who the person behind the makeup is, and with art, the guy that plays him….he’s a really great guy I can relate to in a good handful of ways, making art less of a freaky clown, and more of, “ok, just a normal slasher villain with a goofball tendency here and there.” And I now have become a fan of terrifier 😅 if you hear /see me fanboying over him…. #sorrynotsorry

[brookesmultifandomhell]

Eric: aw fuck

Me: 🤤 😍 🤭 🤤 😍

Eric Draven in The Crow (1994)

[brookesmultifandomhell]

I never did get a good grip on the last twilight fic I was working on before I lost my grandpa (I now can’t seem to write for it, and I don’t know why) but now I have a *diffrent* fic that’s more out there than before (not something I normally write for) so now I’m about to throw myself into reasearch and a new twilight fic 😅

Damn you six foot seven Felix volturi (at least I think that’s how tall he was supposed to be. I think the dude that played him was six six, and fuck he’s hot)

[brookesmultifandomhell]

I once had a crow friend hang with me Halloween morning while I craved a pumpkin for the trick or treaters….i hope my little buddy is going well. He sat on a little brick stair next to me and watched while I talked to him. Such a sweet baby!

[brookesmultifandomhell]

I really needed this hit of happy 😭 now if only I could get a Brandon hug 😫

[brookesmultifandomhell]

🤤

SIIIGHS