carolinehawks

[carolinehawks]

Well, I suppose the cat's out of the bag now. I might as well be honest with everyone.

Yes, Bill's still dead. Sometimes weird posts still pop up here, he must've queued them? Or someone else has access to the account? Well, it makes less work for me, so I don't mind.

I saw the body myself. Nasty stuff, definitely not what I thought I signed up for. Politicians are such nice, honest people, who on earth would want to murder Bill?

Anyways, don't mind me. I'll just be continuing to pump out content for Bill and the Tories here. If I don't do a good job, I might get sacrificed to the Tory elders, so please like and retweet... err, reblog everything you can!

Intern

[carolinehawks]

I..... think I'll stick with my lesbian polycule thank you

Today’s Layton Ship of the Day is:

Caroline Hawks X Leon Bronev

[carolinehawks]

I am busy living my best life in a lesbian polycule

Clive vs. Caroline Hawks vs. Don Paulo

@definitely-future-luke @carolinehawks @the-donpaolo

[carolinehawks]

Huh..... it seems the people had a hard time deciding. Although I would see my wonderful self as the clear winner I suppose the people have spoken.....

Round 1: Caroline vs. Barton

[carolinehawks]

It is with heavy heart that I announce my resignation to the @billhawks campaign to instead join @layton-heritage-posts

[carolinehawks]

vote for me if you love classy women who found love again after their husband went missing at greggs

[carolinehawks]

Here’s how polls will work:

Starting at 8am a match will be rolled out at each hour. The sets of three will be at the end.

in the match of three the highest two will move on and one will have they’re spot shuffled.

[carolinehawks]

Gentlemen I present to you…

Our main cast: Voting starts tomorrow

In the left ring we have!:

@evilbillhawks - master of UwU and making me want to have an aneurism

@clairefoley - Wants Bill Hawks off her ghostly dashboard and the kids

@akihirohinoceooflevel5 - lied about McDonald’s and left Kat at Walmart (last minute switch out with grosky)

@theprofessorsapprentice - he may be really upset that happy meals don’t make you happy, and his family tree is fucked up now, but he’ll be happy to know he’ll be running for rp best boi

@henry-led0re - Doesn’t know where he is, but he sure is having a lot of fun playing Hannah Montana and Mario Kart

@billhawks - … don’t vote him

@randall-bratscot - let Katrielle leave containment (Walmart) and now god (famed inventor of the happy meal) himself is after him

@inspector-alfendi-layton - isn’t going to win!

@layton-heritage-posts - The first heritage blog to be turned into a catboy, having a heritagsona, and be able to be voted for in a sexyman tournament

In the right ring!:

@floorareinhold - She’s relevant in my heart, and has the biggest head of the low quality chart

@definitely-future-luke - Went to Gregg’s with Gregglover and bill hawks, but didn’t invite the big naturals smh

@the-donpaolo - is planning on sabotaging the tournament, I’m watching you 👀 (also I’m down to commit crime too)

@dralainstahngun - mr not Dimitri Allen has still not found somebody to be his test subject

@carolinehawks - getting it with the big naturals because Gregg’s took everything away from her

@barton-of-the-yard - KNOWS that lying about happy meals are one of the most despicable crimes you can commit

@professor-layton-yaoi - May not win it he divorce (even his kids don’t want him) but he may win sexiest blog

@jean-transcole - his poor guy his dad was a slut and now he has like 15 brothers, at least he has his amongus chuck nuggie- oh wait

@greggslover - Need I say more this is the most iconic Layton character. Lost a last minute flash round and at the last second got revived!

Oh and for all of the other blogs that lost in the flash round… I have a surprise for you later

[carolinehawks]

I believe they are all lesbians Bill but I've read polycules can work in a way in which not everyone is romantically involved with everyone else in a magazine at the hair salon! So I suppose if you are with me, you technically are in the polycule already...

Me and @billhawks getting some greggs today!

[carolinehawks]

I was very lonely Bill..... Greggs took everything... I needed to look after myself somehow you know....

Me and @billhawks getting some greggs today!

[carolinehawks]

Hm... Well I suppose a woman of class such as myself sometimes has to look out for number one.

So be it, I'll accept your offer.

Hello, Emmy. I am definitely future Luke (long story, time travel etc) and I heard you were on the hunt for milfs. @carolinehawks is definitely a "milf" in my opinion. I think you should have an affair with her, also could you imagine Bill Hawks' reaction

Thank you future Luke! I have no idea what happened with time travel for you to be here, but I'm glad you stopped by! Now then...

@carolinehawks I could treat you better than that little man ever could ;)

[carolinehawks]

Well I suppose Bill is in a bit of a tight spot right now....

Is one of you rich at least?

Hello, Emmy. I am definitely future Luke (long story, time travel etc) and I heard you were on the hunt for milfs. @carolinehawks is definitely a "milf" in my opinion. I think you should have an affair with her, also could you imagine Bill Hawks' reaction

Thank you future Luke! I have no idea what happened with time travel for you to be here, but I'm glad you stopped by! Now then...

@carolinehawks I could treat you better than that little man ever could ;)

[carolinehawks]

Bill!? Don't leave me with these insane people! Please find a way to escape that madman and return to me! I cannot imagine having to be corrupt and hating children all alone.... and without someone to give me money for the small luxuries in life such as having one villa in every major city in the UK....

Hello, Emmy. I am definitely future Luke (long story, time travel etc) and I heard you were on the hunt for milfs. @carolinehawks is definitely a "milf" in my opinion. I think you should have an affair with her, also could you imagine Bill Hawks' reaction

Thank you future Luke! I have no idea what happened with time travel for you to be here, but I'm glad you stopped by! Now then...

@carolinehawks I could treat you better than that little man ever could ;)

[carolinehawks]

What is it with you people!?

@billhawks DO something!

Hello, Emmy. I am definitely future Luke (long story, time travel etc) and I heard you were on the hunt for milfs. @carolinehawks is definitely a "milf" in my opinion. I think you should have an affair with her, also could you imagine Bill Hawks' reaction

Thank you future Luke! I have no idea what happened with time travel for you to be here, but I'm glad you stopped by! Now then...

@carolinehawks I could treat you better than that little man ever could ;)

[carolinehawks]

Oh? oho well.. nice that someone notices that at least... (ahem @billhawks)

Yes I did indeed get a haircut! By a new absolutely incredible hairstyist from Edinburgh, recommended to me by my friend Babette!

How close are you to your donation goal?

…ah, the donations…

We only need 1k pounds more…

[carolinehawks]

Bill, please get that disgusting freak arrested IMMEDIATELY

How close are you to your donation goal?

…ah, the donations…

We only need 1k pounds more…

[carolinehawks]

I expect you to come home with an apology gift Bill. What will Babette, Jill and Gladys think when they hear about this on the news? Do you even think about your poor wife when you say these things?

Do you all like my bow tie?

the professor says it makes me look classy