complexfeelingssimplewords

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

Words can’t do you justice.

if you were to argue that life’s purpose is to enrich ourselves in the alluring sights nature has to offer,

id tell you i must be the only person truly living,

of course any given person can revel in the shared vision as the sun meets the horizon,

how it transforms the mundane colours of day,

casting endless hues of soft light over previously trivial rooftops in the fleeting moments before darkness,

but even so,

not all are so fortunate to be blessed with the sights i cherish,

i could never truthfully claim that the celestial map is not a thing to be marvelled,

but tell me,

how am i to admire the stars with the sincerity i once held,

the sincerity they demand,

when the man beside me, sharing in my experience of this dusk,

undeniably embodies every quality necessary to deem him the most divine product nature was capable of,

how can i be expected to act ignorant in the face of pure ethereal beauty in order to submerge myself in the art of creation,

when the concept of comparison disregards and dims the light of any and all works beside him,

after all,

a candle stood alone may be a thing to behold,

to accredit for its soft and subtle illumination,

but beside the sun,

it would lack any purpose at all,

becoming overlooked by the very people who once relied on its shed guidance,

not to say that i have become unappreciative of the wondrous sights this world provides,

simply that i believe any onlooker is wasting their time searching for a muse, an inspiration, an object of devotion,

if they are yet to witness mine,

even heaven itself pales in comparison to the angelic qualities my lover possesses.

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

uncontrollable urges

share your taste with me and allow this experience to linger on our lips,

the leftover nicotine from your morning cigarette must coat your tongue in a way that somehow allows it to infiltrate my bloodstream,

explaining my inexplicable lack of ability to pull away despite the circumstances,

succumbing completely to the addiction i find between your lips,

i wear my desperation with pride,

grasping at the neckline of your clothing to pull you in closer,

closer,

closer,

not close enough,

the heat between us begins to meld our writhing body’s together,

entangled in mutual yearning,

the suggestion of you departing hangs over our heads,

neither of us willing to intervene in breaking the pure intimacy of the act,

nor willing to acknowledge any reason for our refusal to,

passion builds hastily in a way that blurs the line between want and need,

heavy breathes shared between our lips in the fleeting seconds we stop to smile into this divine warmth,

even your oxygen belongs to me in this moment,

hushed voices discuss the morality of our actions and yet we continue unburdened by their connotations,

helpless to the drive of our bodies as they express their shameless craving for one and other,

i become painfully aware of a feral hunger id previously been oblivious to,

the severe lacking totally unnoticed until it was satiated by you.

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

Resisting Reality

i know you won’t stay,

you’ve always been more of a pop up tent than a permanent fixture,

a fleeting side character as opposed to the lasting love interest in this story,

i know my time with you is likely limited,

so please, excuse my obvious desperation,

the way i soak up each visit, resisting sleep in order to savour every last moment of every encounter,

pushing my wakeful windows into the early hours of the morning just to be within your company a little longer,

i’ve learnt to expect each time to be the last so i cherish our contact as if we may never share this space again,

i’m all too aware of the ticking of our usual countdown,

overcome by the apprehension it brings,

watching the time slip hopelessly through my grasp before you’re abruptly brought to your senses,

you’ll soon turn and run once more,

you always do,

but i’m not angry,

with little concern for the pity this statement may invoke,

i’m grateful,

i would much rather have you just for a chapter,

even just a page,

live in this temporary place of existence where i feel as if you might possibly belong to me,

knowing this path leads to a harsh exposure back to the reality of our connection,

id much rather burn daylight in your short lived embrace,

than allow my anticipation of your absence,

to stop me from experiencing you at all.

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

none of it matters

none of it at all

i don’t care if you’re broken

if you’re damaged

i’ll hold you together until all the pieces fit right again

just let me hold you

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

No terms or conditions

i stand to gain nothing from your presence,

my feelings for you entirely unrequited,

there is no exchange, no transaction,

no emotional, physical, or monetary value in the act of reserving a piece of my heart solely for you,

yet i look to you as if you hold the sun in your very hands,

it’s utterly unconditional,

pure in that my dedication to you is not tethered to any form of reciprocation,

experiencing you has altered my very beliefs that surround infatuation,

i couldn’t have fathomed discovering unquestioning comfort caused by loving in darkness,

perceiving my passion as a lone act lacking of a partner to share it with,

but even the twilight abyss is carefully crafted to contain constellations,

a complex beauty intended to be admired while accompanied by the cold isolation that night brings,

i find similar solace within the freckles that adorn your complexion,

mimicking such a concept in a way that outshines even the original masterpiece,

a silver lining within your doubtful expressions,

intended to be admired regardless of circumstance,

i need not for your touch or affirmations,

only for your company,

your presence alone holds higher value than you could comprehend,

with every passing moment i am able to observe you,

to analyse your reactions and responses,

realisation becomes more gruelling to swallow,

even under dimly lit conditions its disturbingly clear that you have been taught to seek motives where you should see unreserved honesty,

harshness where you should see true vulnerability,

fists where you should see the unfaltering welcome of open palms,

but my manner is not an incentive,

my actions are not calculated,

my behaviour lacks thought or even consideration,

i am simply well beyond capable of suppressing my instinct to care for you.

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

I can't dare to dream about you anymore

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

Instagram credit: coffeeyre

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

loveliest little coffee shop :')

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

Unconvicted Murderer

do you believe you could get away with murder?

suppose if I suggested it be your own blood to brandish the weapon wielded,

could you partake in such a crime falling victim to your own hand?

I myself have lived countless lives under a variety of pretences thanks to my comfortability with the very concept of my own death,

with each new observer I willingly suffer the gruelling act of calculated rebirth,

reincarnating into somebody you may look upon with misguided infatuation,

a faultless projection of the perfect devotee obtaining any and all necessary skill sets you desire,

my past self hitting the stained slab mercilessly as I carve with the harsh profession of a hurried butcher,

desensitised to the cruel craft they’ve so often practiced,

I accept my given role as naturally as the evolutionary instinct of a prey disguising itself from its predators hunt,

seamlessly mirroring your every movement in order to hide within the shields of your shadow,

fearing that if I were to breach the spotlight of prying eyes,

you may see me clearly for the empty vessel I stand to be without your presence to fuel me,

keeping you blissfully ignorant to the eccentric soul I possess when i’m not practicing impersonation,

study my face and tell me with genuine earnest that you adore me,

but know that these eyes staring back shall be your own,

expertly enticing you into sharing your warmth just for a little while longer,

whilst embedding myself within you,

I somehow found comfort in the irony of such drastic emotional distance with the knowledge that you’d never really known me at all,

you cannot reject what you do not know with any more conviction than that of an uninformed fool,

when I am alone once again,

I retrace myself,

I realise while studying my own nature that I much prefer my inherited intricate details to the the ones I temporarily adorn,

the scars of each past killing shining with a remarkable likeness to silver linings,

I ponder the idea of allowing myself to be known,

yet inevitably when posed with the potential of another’s intrigue,

I reach for my familiar weapon of choice and allow the blood to seep once more,

helpless to my own protective procedure,

only to be left yearning for another who may see through my crimes of semblance and greet the ghost who haunts me.

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

Instagram credit: laurasreadingtime

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

mood

I prefer a crack head mood swing style of writing where an idea comes to mind I just HAVE to write it down. Like the one time I wrote a 2,500 word chapter a 3am half asleep and loopy.

i also take copious notes on anything that actually pops into my head bc i suffer from "no thoughts, head empty" all the time and occasionally forget to breathe.

[complexfeelingssimplewords]

feel free to stop and read and maybe we can feel together

all original poetry under the tag ‘my poems’

enjoy your time here, friend

[complexfeelingssimplewords]