daily-beetle-predictions

[daily-beetle-predictions]

im a man sorry cani have a prediction

I predict beetles are gonna eat you

Probably June Beetles

[daily-beetle-predictions]

Is it relivent that I don't have a phone or believ in checking my email

and i know people mean well when they give employment advice but god damn some of them its like "did you try submitting your resume to a place that is hiring" fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck no kidding. shit. ive just been printing them out and eating them. yeah thanks i'll try that

[daily-beetle-predictions]

isn't it crazy that a woman being gender nonconforming literally just requires her to exist in her own body without making any changes whatsoever. why does the fact that i don't wear makeup and i don't shave and i don't wear a bra have to be some political act. why can't i just fucking exist

[daily-beetle-predictions]

"I asked ChatGPT"

I asked the psychic girl in the ceiling of the Jack in the Box and she told me you're falling face first off a cliff into spiky rocks at 23

[daily-beetle-predictions]

I keep applying to places but I never hear back idk what's wrong

and i know people mean well when they give employment advice but god damn some of them its like "did you try submitting your resume to a place that is hiring" fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck no kidding. shit. ive just been printing them out and eating them. yeah thanks i'll try that

[daily-beetle-predictions]

Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you I AM THE BEETLE GIRL

I'm using my psychic powers to hex you, you WILL fall into an open manhole the second you least expect it

A Lady Just Like me

Today's beetle is a ladybug. Very delicate and not nearly as harmful to the enviornment as the rumors suggest.

[daily-beetle-predictions]

[daily-beetle-predictions]

Hey Bethany! Where have you been?

Well...

I put the blog on password protection for a few days while I took a break to evaluate what I wanted. Running this blog and interacting with my followers has been a lot of fun, but it's also been negatively affecting my mental health and making me more online than I'd like. Playing the character of "insane teenager who argues" means I have to argue with people all the time, and I don't really like doing that for long periods of time because it makes me insane.

So what did you find then?

I found that not posting is better for me than trying to run this blog further. I feel like I've extracted all the funny content out of this and any further posting is just running the joke further into the ground. There's only so much rehashing of the same bit I can do before I get bored, and Bethany's anger at receiving the same stupid questions became genuine after a while. I don't want to be enslaved to my phone all day calling everyone "fuckstick" anymore. I'm just not having any fun with it.

But Ivy! Bethany brings me SO much comfort and it's problematic to get rid of her!

Yeah, that's why I'm not deleting the blog, but if you feel this way I recommend logging off. My insane, written-to-be-irredeemable Argument Character being critical to your daily routine may be a sign you need help.

What are you doing now?

I'm retiring this blog. I'm leaving it up but I'm not gonna post on it anymore. If by some miracle I get to a place where running this won't kill me inside, I might come back, but for now I'm done with it. If you have a problem with this, fuck off into the sun, you and your spawn will be cursed hitherto until the end of time. Thanks to everyone who sent asks that were actually funny, and to the extended croakerverse for supporting me in this, I have not been doing well and yall being there and understanding helps a lot. Thanks to Strange for the video, I'm looking forward to hanging out in Toronto in July.

But for now, this is my Fecal Farewell

-Ivy

[daily-beetle-predictions]

If you needed it today, this is your sign: YOU ARE BROKEN IRREPARABLY AND THEY ALL KNOW

[daily-beetle-predictions]

Hello

I apologize for my absence, I have been meditating.

I will not be responding to any of the bots asking for money in my asks but I will say free Palestine.

I am 4 followers from 15, which means 4 people must follow me so I can explode @real-actual-tim-stoker with my mind.

Goodnight, Tumblr

[daily-beetle-predictions]

only 4 more followers

would you survive being exploded

What kind of question is this I'd never be exploded

[daily-beetle-predictions]

"it's all in your head" correct! unfortunately I am also in there

[daily-beetle-predictions]

Why is anon my type tho Not that I would ever betray the feminarchy by acting on my unholy urges to be with a man. But if I did.

as a boything and local autism, can there be a sensory safe room in the gulag ?? please ms. rage 🙏🙏

Yes, obviously, I'm not a barbarian

[daily-beetle-predictions]

Sorry for the lack of bug posts I love you bug lovers never forget me no matter how many bushes I sleep in

[daily-beetle-predictions]

The answer is no.

would you survive being exploded

What kind of question is this I'd never be exploded

[daily-beetle-predictions]

So sick of ppl assuming hating all men equally is transphobic. Hating trans men and cis men equally is trans-inclusive actually. Ppl need to wake up

Exactly. Don't other them as some gotcha

[daily-beetle-predictions]

Been really into @hymen-restoration-project lately I want her to notice me