defunctforworms

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friendly reminder that I've moved. NEW BLOG BABYYYY.

@dirgeforworms

Apparently I was, in fact, restraining myself with this being a sideblog from main, new blog has more gear, so there's that?

@dirgeforworms

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NEW BLOG HAS BEEN MADE.

DM me for details and I'll send you a link, This blog will be up for a month while I queue up all of my reblogs from here since I don't wanna lose them, then it'll be deleted.

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It's a good idea, so fyi that I WILL be deleting this blog sometime in the next week and starting over with a new blog unattached to my current account, so I can be more of a freak on main and not worry about deletion. Should be the same name. Obviously I'll post here before it does happen.

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Huu

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BDSM gets a bad rep as like a violent (male) dom pushing the boundaries of a reluctant (female) sub but in my experience it's a lot of subs with wildly elaborate fantasies screaming shit like "PUT MY ASS IN THE CHILI" while a new dom is like "Okay I think, we are reaching yellow for me,"

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My horny ass could not be a monster hunter

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"Collared subs this coared subs that" shoutout to my collared doms/tops. I'm letting my pretty little thing keep me on a leash like a king's prized hunting dog

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marquis magazine no. 6

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That's not going to work again.

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flickr

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"why do people conflate top/bottom and Dom/sub" because we haven't socially destigmatized kink. that's literally it.

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If I had a nickle for every time I had a super intense dream where a woman slit her lover's throat and watched him die where it was portrayed as deeply necessary but also achingly romantic I'd have two nickles.

Which isn't a lot but it's weird that it's happened twice.

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Hajime Sorayama (2012)

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Frothing at the mouth every time I see a sex ed resource that says "use condoms" without any further elaboration. "Condoms prevent STIs and pregnancy in the vast majority of cases when used correctly" but then they don't talk about what correctly IS

Correct use of a condom means

Using the right size, because if it's too big it can slide off or leak and if it's too small it can break or come off. Condoms usually come in 5 sizes, I'm sure you could find others outside of that as well but in ten years of sex work I found they covered everyone

Using lube, even if you think you don't need it. With the exception of oral sex, condoms should always be used with lube, 100% of the time. Most important lube should be applied to the outside but a drop in the tip of the condom before putting it in is also a good idea

Being mindful that latex is prone to wearing out, being damaged by heat etc. Condoms should be kept somewhere cool, not folded in wallets or sat on in back pockets and should be changed between activities and after about 15 minutes of any vigorous activity. Ask me how I know (a condom snapped on my leg when a client was pulling out, because I didn't change it when I should have)

The penetrative partner should hold the base of the condom when they pull out, and should do so immediately after they ejaculate so the condom doesn't leak or come off as the penis gets flaccid

Bonus: a lot of people think hand stuff can't transmit STIs. Wrong! If you give your partner a handjob and then touch yourself you can get HPV, herpes (low risk), and infections like chlamydia and gonorrhea

This isn't meant to be stressful, and the most common STIs are the most treatable - and often curable - but getting gonorrhea in your eyes after a facial still extremely sucks and yet no one talks about the fact that any mucous membrane can be effected, not just your genitals (yes this includes your mouth and throat)

In ten years of doing sex work where I saw 10 clients a day most of the time I've had 4 condom fails ever. One was what I mentioned above when it snapped on my leg, one was a client on top of me didn't get off fast enough after he finished and the condom came off, and the other two were a Glyde brand magnum that was inexplicably twice the thickness of a regular condom and didn't stay put on anyone so I suggest just avoiding Glyde entirely (their water based lubes also stain fyi). With all other brands correct use = extremely safe

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Emilia Castañeda Martínez