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A   PRIVATE   AND   EXTREMELY   SELECTIVE   EADY   █████   FROM  𝘏̲𝘌̲𝘈̲𝘛̲   (1995).       HEADCANON -  BASED   AND   HEAVILY   CANON   DIVERGENT.      MATURE   AND   TRIGGERING   CONTENT   MAY   APPEAR.       MINORS   DNI.       DEPICTED   BY   KEEN.       THIS   BLOG   IS   HEAVILY   AFFILIATED   WITH   @MCCAULEY.

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EVERYTHING BEGINS AND ENDS AT THE KENTUCKY CLUB SENTENCE STARTERS / CHANGE PRONOUNS & TWEAK AS NECESSARY

Written by Benjamin Alire Sáenz (author of Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe), this book compiles seven short stories set between El Paso, Texas and Juárez, Chihuahua. The Kentucky Club, a real-life bar a few blocks south of the border crossing in Juárez, appears as a linking motif in all seven stories that touch on themes of survival, grief, family, love and sexuality.

HE HAS GONE TO BE WITH THE WOMEN

Some people are so beautiful that they belong everywhere they go.

And anyway, no one knew who I was. Not even me.

I’m not looking for a hook-up.

Everybody knows who you are.

The world’s a big place.

The world you live in can give you all the specifics you need.

You seem not to notice anything except the book you’re reading.

You’re beautiful. And me? Not so beautiful.

You’re something better than beautiful.

What’s better than beautiful?

Interesting is much better than beautiful.

If I don’t say anything, I’ll stay interesting.

I’m not afraid of getting killed. Are you?

I don’t mind. I like the way you look at me.

I could look at you for a long time.

You can kiss me again.

Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve kissed anyone?

I thought about you when I woke up this morning.

You’re not sad. You’re just hurt.

Nothing will happen. We can live like this forever.

You don’t have to tell me what I already know.

You must have been very handsome.

I never gave it much thought.

Since when is being handsome a virtue?

I didn’t like thinking about what I looked like. I don’t think I liked having a body.

Someone hurt me. When I was a boy.

I’m happy you loved him so much.

THE ART OF TRANSLATION

How could they have done this? How could they do this to you?

Shouldn’t everyone’s scars be silent and hidden?

I knew that something in me had died.

No one’s going to hurt you here.

You said you wanted to learn the meanings of every word that existed in the world.

Scars are not just places of hurt. They’re places of healing.

You could learn to love anything.

He’s a little young for you, isn’t he?

You never used to drink.

There’s a lot of things I never used to do.

THE RULE MAKER

I remember the first time I got into a fight. I wasn’t any good at it.

Don’t ever answer the door if I’m not here.

She doesn’t like to talk. I have that in common with her.

So you’re a fucking comedian.

I don’t like people who cry about things.

I’ve been numb most of my life. That’s how I’ve survived.

What if you don’t come home? What will I do?

I wasn’t interested in god and I didn’t think he was interested in me either.

We just sort of ignored each other.

What’s wrong with you? You want people to notice us?

I wanted to find out what I had become.

I don’t know. And you don’t know either.

There’s a lot of shit that goes down here. I don’t want you in the middle of it.

People who worry never change.

BROTHER IN ANOTHER LANGUAGE

Instead of winding up dead, I wound up in a therapist’s office.

Silly boy, you are alive.

Do you have any idea what you’ve done to them?

It might mean they love you.

Hating your father is a lot of work.

Do you know what to do with love?

I just don’t hate her. I feel sorry for her.

Don’t you think everyone deserves to be loved?

No. Not everyone deserves to be loved.

And anyway, that’s not the way it works.

It’s so unnecessary to hate a man who hates himself as much as you do.

I never knew what to say.

Really? You seem comfortable enough with words.

I have a formal and aesthetic relationship with words.

Do you hate yourself for loving me and not him?

There’s no one in the world left to love me.

Sometimes decent people make you do decent things.

Why would anybody want to feel alive?

SOMETIMES THE RAIN

Thinking was the last thing they were interested in.

I didn’t have a plan.

Talking and sleeping, those were my two favourite things.

I think I wanted her to dump me. And it’s not as if I was gonna marry her.

How’d you learn to think?

Maybe I just need to get out of here.

You should leave too. You’re too good for this fucking place.

You want to pretend that nothing’s going on between us?

If I don’t leave this goddamn place, I’m gonna go nuts.

You need a life. I need a life.

Being alone was good. Really, really good.

Get in the car.

Are you sure you don’t want to go to a doctor?

I’m tired of being sorry. I’m so fucking tired.

I know. I’m just being an asshole.

You’re not. You’re not an asshole.

I could sit here forever.

Me too. So long as you were sitting right next to me.

You think you can do this all by yourself?

This is how you start to live again.

Get yourself happy.

What about you?

Oh, I think I’ll get myself happy too.

I think about you sometimes.

I should have kissed you. But I was so afraid you wouldn’t kiss me back.

When I go home again, will you be there?

I promise to stop being afraid.

CHASING THE DRAGON

Neither of them appears to be happy.

Being right about things doesn’t mean a damn thing in this world.

Have you fallen in love yet?

It’s not as if I have to choose.

When are you going to introduce me to him?

I was looking at the photograph.

She doesn’t love you. She doesn’t love anyone.

It hurts everywhere. Can’t you see that?

You really think she’ll ever want to come back?

I knew you were lying.

How? I’m a pretty good liar.

You can’t lie to me. You just can’t.

Maybe it’s because I don’t want to lie to you. It’s nice to tell the truth.

We were never young, not ever.

I’m not sure what to think about that.

What’s wrong with a little happiness?

I like you. There’s something about you that’s real.

And, in case you hadn’t noticed, you’re beautiful to look at.

The thing is that I hate my fucking job.

You’re better than that. You’re smarter than that.

Doesn’t it matter what I want?

You’re not taking your meds, are you?

I’m not judging. You know me better. I just worry.

So talk today or talk tomorrow. I’m not going anywhere.

And you find him again, the dragon, and you want to live with him forever. But you can’t.

I was born old.

I’m telling you the truth.

That’s why I want you to stop.

THE HURTING GAME

Now? It’s one thirty in the morning.

You were asleep?

What else would I be doing at one thirty in the morning?

I could think of a few things.

Take it any way you can get it, babe.

Sometimes reading makes you feel alive.

Let’s just say I like to sleep with people I find interesting.

How many people do you find interesting?

You’re quiet tonight.

I don’t always have something to say.

You’re a mystery.

I could fall in love with a guy like you.

That’s a load of crap. You just think I’m pretty to look at.

We make the rules and we can always change them.

He’ll just be a bad memory one day.

You’re a better man than you think you are.

Love’s a hurting game, don’t you know that? But it’s worth it.

Sometimes it’s worth it.

We have touch. It’s good. Let’s just leave it at that.

You always a wiseass?

You don’t know what you’re missing.

I’ve never tried walking out in front of a bus. I’m pretty sure I know what would happen.

Don’t get any ideas. I’m not your fucking wife.

Yeah, well, life is a little bigger than all of us.

Maybe that’s the key to it all, that we’re all fucked up and the only way we survive is to do the love thing, you know?

You told me once that you didn’t do the love thing.

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non-sexual forms of intimacy.   send me ‘INTIMACY +’ a number between 1-125 and i’ll write a starter or a drabble about our muses engaging in a form of intimacy outside of sexual context.   note: as the level of trust required for the things listed here varies a lot, feel free to send multiple numbers if you aren’t sure if they’ll work! bonus:   if the mun is comfortable with randomising a number if asked, state so in the tags when you reblog!

1        watching tv/movies together

2        going to an event together  ( like a carnival, festival, etc. )

3        going on dates, like to the movies or shopping

4        sharing secrets

5        hugs

6        sharing drinks

7        having a phone call

8        touching noses

9        cuddling

10      having a philosophical discussion

11      hand holding

12      sharing jokes

13      sharing smiles

14      laying your head on someone’s shoulder

15      linking arms

Keep reading

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different ways to say ‘i love you’. 

‘i’ll make you something, yeah? your favorite dish, just for you.’

‘let’s get you back to bed.’

‘shh, it was just a nightmare.’

‘you like this, don’t you? i remember you saying that.’

‘i drew up a bath for you.’

‘you need rest.’

‘you ought to be asleep.’

‘i bought two.’

‘here. you can have the rest.’

‘i thought of you when i saw this.’

‘i like your smile.’

‘you have a cute laugh.’

‘stay there. i’m coming there to get you.’

‘it’s okay, i’m here, we’re okay.’

‘be careful.’

‘look both ways.’

‘you mean so much to me.’

‘i can’t lose you.’

‘i thought i might have lost you.’

‘how to you feel about the nickname, (insert nickname)?’

‘it looks good on you.’

‘i’ll make you soup.’

‘ah-ah-ah. you’re sick. you need to stay in bed.’

‘are you okay in there?’

‘that’s it, that’s it. get it all out. shh.’

‘it’s a remedy i knew. helps with your throat.’

‘it’s a lullaby. would you like me to sing it to you? would that help you fall asleep?’

‘i’m worried about you.’

‘what do you want to watch?’

‘where would you like to go for dinner?’

‘close your eyes and hold out your hands.’

‘we’ll figure it out.’

‘oh, it’s not big deal. you’re fine.’

‘i brought you some medicine for your cold.’

‘you’re important to me.’

‘this is your favorite song, right?’

‘you’re like a son/daughter to me.’

‘good luck!’

‘you’re like a mom/dad to me.’

‘don’t say that about yourself.’

‘want to come with?’

“wow! you look really nice.’

‘goodnight, (insert term of affection).’

‘it’s okay. i couldn’t sleep anyway.’

‘you can have half.’

‘come here. let me fix it.’

‘your tie is crooked.’

‘c’mere. shh, it’s okay.’

‘i’m not going to hurt you.’

‘can i touch you?’

‘can i kiss you?’

‘can i hug you?’

‘promise.’

‘would i ever lie to you?’

‘i think you’re very beautiful/handsome.’

‘hey, good-looking.’

‘of course i care. you’re my family.’

‘one more chapter.’

‘i love you.’

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