evanotevil

[evanotevil]

I FINALLY SURVIVED A BATTLE LETS GOOOOOOO

[evanotevil]

aita for leaving my cowardly ass husband (30ish idk M) to get killed by a weird scientist?

I (20ish idk F) am married to this guy whos like a minor politician (hes not big enoigh to be important but he gets invited to mayoral dinners and shit). While he works and sleeps I (a changeling) sneak out and smuggle goods and stuff for spare change. Ive recently made a few friends that ive been able to smuggle with and poke around with that my husband doesn't know about. Last night, i went to the Mayor's gala dinner with my husband, and my group of friends went in undercover to try and kidnap someone (long story). In the middle of the dinner, a big ass robot stands up and threatens the mayor. I could honestly care less about that stuff, so i just played my normal act of clutching my pearls and shit. Apparently a little bit of chaos means that all hell breaks loose because SOMEONE tried to fucking chloroform me so i stabbed them ofc. But when i tried to get my husband to help me, the fucker had already run away! Cowardly ass mf.

so later on that night i get a note to go to a warehouse that id done a drop at before, so i show up there with my crew. When we get there tho, this weird ass gnome scientist tells me that he hates elves so he kidnapped my husband (btw im in cat form soooo whats a husband never heard of that) and that he wants my skin (ew). So i say fuck that guy fuck the random guy you have tied up over there (my husband) lets fucking run. So i run. Apparently my party member felt bad and untied him and we kinda dumped him on the street, but now hes pissed at me that i left him to die! AITA?? Also how do i make him forget that im a changeling?

[evanotevil]

horrible news: I HAVE BEEN GIVEN A GUN

LETS GOOOOOOOOOO

[evanotevil]

im back bitchessssss

(I got sick and missed two sessions 😭 BUT IM BACK)

[evanotevil]

i feel like shit my voice is goneeeeee how ever will i attend the gala oh nooooo....

fuck that gala tbh

see i actually really wanna go but im irl sick and im prolly missing this session and im really saddddd but copium

[evanotevil]

o shit this is that girl we found and then I got attached to lmfaooooo

[evanotevil]

which of you fuckers asked me to smuggle SOME GUYS ARM???????

BRO HE LITERALLY CUT IT OFF HIMSELF TF DO YOU NEED THIS SHIT FOR????

[evanotevil]

bad news guys my husband just called out my shitty cooking

like for all he knows im trying my damn best so its honestly rude for him to say that my oatmeal tastes like i dont love him

[evanotevil]

me when im a modern woman who rejects the idea of having a normal biological family and doesn't want kids

but then my party rescues a cool gilded girl who doesn't talk much and has a lot of people out to kill her and plays tic tac toe with me...

👀

[evanotevil]

girl help our party has 2 rogues 2 paladins a sorcerer and NO FUCKING HEALERS

i have died

THREE TIMES

[evanotevil]

Meet my drug dealer persona!!!

if any of you dare snitch I will pluck out your eyes and pickle them to sell in the market square

If you ever buy moonshine in the dead of night from a tabaxi with black fur with just a hint of emerald green undertones and green eyes, congrats! I'm your dealer!

Name: Cats/Kats/Katz (however you want to spell it, ill know what you mean)

Pronouns: any

Products I sell: moonshine, hooch, whiskey, wine, ale, mead, whatever I'm shipped, I sell. (Also fake ids for voting by commission)

About me: Thats literally it. You know more than that and I have to take your tongue. Also, you will ONLY see me at night. If there is light in the sky, it isn't me, so don't ask.

[evanotevil]

**this is a sideblog im using to keep track of a dnd character**

Introduction time!

Name: Eva Katz

Age: A lady never tells (20ish)

Pronouns: she/her when I'm around my husband, anything when I'm among friends.

About me: I am a lady of society by day, a shadow by night. My husband works in government (and somehow is still the most unobservant man I have ever met) while I take care of the house and other such boring tasks. By night, however, some could call me a smuggler. I personally prefer the term trader, but no matter. Besides, everyone needs to get their fix somehow, so does it really matter where it comes from? Anyways I'm trying to save up money to leave my husband and go exploring on my own. I don't want to live a sheltered life where I have to hide who I am anymore. (I was raised in an orphanage and married off for money. I did not particularly enjoy that) But one day I will explore the world!