f1uffy-turtle

[f1uffy-turtle]

you tell any adult over the age of 50 that you're looking for a job and they're frothing at the mouth to offer insight bc they think your young and/or lazy ass has never even conceived what they're about to tell you. and it's printing your resume onto a very disposable piece of paper and walking into the workplace and handing it to a random employee

[f1uffy-turtle]

Going directly from what the average person I know in real life thinks constitutes kinky sex to what the average person I follow on Tumblr thinks constitutes kinky sex like

[f1uffy-turtle]

[f1uffy-turtle]

if I was matt murdock and I found out the same chemical spill that blinded me and lit the world on “fire” turned a bunch of turtles into pizza loving ninjas I would lose it actually

[f1uffy-turtle]

does anyone hve any sin recommendations i just fell from the garden of eden five seconds ago

[f1uffy-turtle]

[f1uffy-turtle]

[f1uffy-turtle]

you ever see a famous 20-something woman and think that she’s very pretty but also you know in your heart she has the potential to age into the most etherial gilf known to lesbianism. but you also know that because of her social standing and the current cultural landscape she’s going to get loads of plastic surgery and botox and you will be robbed of ever getting to witness her maximum divine gilfyness potential. it’s just so sad. why must I be doomed to watch these women poorly taxidermy their youth

[f1uffy-turtle]

Wait I just found out Tendi's VA also voiced Lord Dominator from Wander Over Yonder. Noël Wells. That's so funny. How did she manage to get typecast as "excitable dorky green alien girl with freckles"

[f1uffy-turtle]

they hate to see me coming

[f1uffy-turtle]

they should make weight loss ads illegal and I’m not kidding

[f1uffy-turtle]

the reason Phineas and Ferb is one of my favorite shows of all time is because adult jokes in other family shows are usually about sex. in Phineas and Ferb they are referencing classic literature and bureaucracy.

[f1uffy-turtle]

The real thing with ADHD is not "I forgot", but that forgetting is this ongoing process. I remembered! And then I forgot.

At ten this (hypothetical) morning I remembered that I have a meeting at six. And then from 11 through 3 I worked on other stuff and had zero thoughts about that meeting. Maybe even thought about what I was gonna do with my evening at home. Got attached to the idea of taking the time to make a good dinner, maybe play some video games.

And then at three I said, "Oh! Fuck!" and remembered again, hopefully long enough to set an alarm. And then I went to the bathroom and remembered that I need to clean the counter and spent twenty minutes cleaning the bathroom and went to get a snack and then at five I said, "OH! FUCK!" and had to scramble to dress like a real adult and get out the door.

It isn't one clean forgetting. It's a constant process of forgetting and then, with an exhausting adrenaline spike, remembering. And then forgetting. Baby, I can forget the same thing more times in a day than you ever forgot your parents' anniversary.

[f1uffy-turtle]

the person who posted this on here is a terf so im reposting it because its really really good

[f1uffy-turtle]

okay i have to show everyone my favorite tiktok.

you don’t understand. i could recite this from memory.

[f1uffy-turtle]

[f1uffy-turtle]

I am so sick and tired of seeing the trans women around me being slowly hot coaled into the closet and into essentially being forced back into "Men who would really love being women but Can't because they Aren't". It is so painful stop fucking doing this to our trans women. Stop forcing them to be "Fine" with being called dude bro man he and biologically male stop it stop it stop it you are killing her. You are killing her.