fatasswhitetrash

[fatasswhitetrash]

My Sister is Obsessed with me

I have a younger sister who we have never ever gotten along and she has made it her life’s work to stalk, harasses me and even go as far and making fake post acting like me I guess in hopes to hurt me in my legal shit but I find it fucking hilarious because like she’s 30 something and sits at her computer trolling me all day like everyday and its fucking pathetic as hell and I just laugh my ass…

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Sunday morning

it’s moms birthday today she would of been 57 years old and I know the kids are just fucking sad as fuck and have been since she died. I’m still smoking meth and I just blew through 30,000 dollars again and I got a 13000 from Fema for the fucking rv out front I paid a new lawyer 7500 fucking dollars and still owe him another 7500 and I paid 2200 for his truck to get out of the shop and then 2800…

[fatasswhitetrash]

Lost in my own depression

Day in and day out I don’t think I experience any real joy I want to I just don’t, I take my meds everyday and don’t feel any different and I’m just tired of being tired I’m tired of getting upset over something small but I don’t just get sad I get suicidal and they say that’s because I have bpd I make mountains out of molehills and I push everyone away and then get mad when they leave! I just…

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My addiction is trying to kill me and hired me as the hitman

Last year I was adamant that I wasn’t going to do drugs in 2023 and by Jan 5th I was high why? Because I was still thinking I was in control of things, which I know better now most times! Addiction is a motherfucker man it is so crazy how I literally have two different personalities I swear ! This is the first day of a new year and I’m ready to put some action into my recovery instead of…

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I have never said no to anyone!

My other friend is about to be released from tdc like in two weeks and before she went we had a huge fight and it was horrible and a lot of horrible things were said! About a week prior to that my car was stolen from the driveway and I had given her my old mini van when we met and anyway she knew she was leaving and knew I was without a car and refused to leave the van with me and she parked it…

[fatasswhitetrash]

I miss my best friend

[fatasswhitetrash]

A letter to my husband.

I don’t know how to say what I wanna say cuz I just end up crying but I’m angry with you for every time you have done this and in no way shape or form am saying that what I have done is in any way ok This is in no way a letter to get you to get back with me but rather just about my feelings and how its felt for me  Living with borderline is fucking impossible and for years I’ve been trying to…

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I think ive had enough.

My husband informed me earlier that he is in love with a girl that I considered a friend but not so much after her ex-boyfriend tried to force himself on me and when I told her she called me a liar. he also informed me that the reason he has to go look for other women is that I don’t give him enough attention, that I don’t have a job, I lay around and do nothing and I’m a horrible fucking wife.…

[fatasswhitetrash]

Im going to regret this

My husband, all of a sudden, like four days ago, started ACTIVELY trying to find a car for me, and that might not sound like a bad thing to everyone else, but I find it highly suspect. We had a normal conversation about separating when he left earlier this week. He kept mentioning that he wanted to stay with his buddy so we could get some space, but he couldn’t because I didn’t have a car.So we…

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Trauma Bond?

I started reading into this a lot recently because I came across it on TikTok and like the first video I really watched the guy said ” The Very Essence of a Trauma Bond is, You Broke me but Only You Can Fix Me” and I knew pretty much right then and there that I am in a trauma bond and it has somewhat brought me some I don’t wanna say peace but more like FUCK IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW It explains…

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I Cant take it anymore.

For ten years i have been put through fucking hell with my husband and I mean from the fucking beginning there was fucking red flags and I should of RUN. The first instance that comes to mind was his wife messaging me with PROOF that he was working out but not at the “gym” where I believed he was going every night and yes this statement can only be true because in fact the SAME WEEK I met him he…

[fatasswhitetrash]

I Want to Die most days

I am always thinking that I could just get the balls to kill myself so that my kids and my husband will be free of my chaos because I am incredibly selfish and won’t just remove myself from the home I stay and essentially torture my husband sometimes. yesterday I took a hammer to his PlayStation 5 and headset and controllers because I was withdrawing and he was trying to comfort me but I was…

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My Husband paid a Hooker

While I was away in jail my husband used my bail money to buy a hooker instead of bailing me out of jail! claimed he left me in there to “help me” pertaining to the drugs and to get some more time under my belt however his ass only left me in there for 3 days extra and during those 3 days he continuously paid for sex with the hooker and then even after I came home continued to talk to her…

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My husband fucked a nasty ass ghetto fucking hooker while I was in jail for a crime we both committed not once or twice but 3 fucking times

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JULY 3 2019

Drugs and hugs Well I guess I could say I went into full relapse on accident like a dumbass and Tim never noticed and finally I just came out and told him and that I needed help it’s kinda freaking me out but he’s being very supportive and telling me I’m not pathetic and I made a mistake and old Tim wanted to come out but he’s not gonna run away I really don’t know what’s happened to him maybe…

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I hate being in active addiction

I do the same fucking bullshit everyday like literally and im always fucking in my room and isolated and fuck man or if I’m not alone im with my best friend smoking dope in the same house that my family lives in. I honestly thought that moving here and getting to start over would be my saving grace and before my house was even put together I was shooting up in the driveway and my justification is…