fatmalovestodraw

[fatmalovestodraw]

Sometimes you need to sleep, sleep a lot. Not to escape, but to rest your soul from your feelings. Because everything, absolutely everything devours you. Completely.

—Brain

[fatmalovestodraw]

“Remember your garden! Life can be big and interesting or full of duties, but happiness dwells in a small and limited place, a secret garden. There the tree of life is growing. Never stay out of there too long. The tree of life grows only in the magic circle, the symbol of one-ness, and that is your garden. It is the only place where it can grow. The power of life comes from that tree. Prisons exist too, but they are not inside, they are outside the garden. You can be a prisoner of opinions, fears, guilt or duties. As soon as you enter the gate of your garden, you are no prisoner anymore, all is locked out.”

— I-Ching -  Hexagram 47 interpretation

[fatmalovestodraw]

6pm

Some say: choose your hard.

Others say: one day, or day one..?

Some believe that the older you are, the wiser, and therefore easier it is to make decisions.

Others might find it hard to wake up the next morning.. or go about their day.

Kudos to you for making it any way, kudos to you for making it in spite of what ever.

[fatmalovestodraw]

3:58pm

I have a feeling of, or more of a need to document some bits from today.

The day started as a regular Wednesday for me, with me being late to both of my classes. I teach the same on Mondays and Wednesdays, and yes i am usually late on both days. It is becoming a signature of mine. Late breakfast, late shower, traffic and boom LATE.

Anyways, I finish the classes, get my regular Americano and head to my office-hour at my office. As i walk in I greet my colleagues and then i setup my desk to start preparing for next week's lectures.

A few minutes later, i start to hear my colleagues discussing their doctoral studies and how they're almost done with it. It got me wondering, if i am ever going to get a PhD.. And to be honest, if i want one. It was an unexplainable moment. I felt a fire in me to research and read and study all of the sudden. to revisit some unfinished explorations of mine from many years ago. Is it just exploration, or am i interested in obtaining the degree..? Am i still interested in the Academic world..? I do not know.

My priorities, my life goals and overall outlook on life has changed. And i shall keep taking it one step at a time.

I do not really know what point i want to make here.. :P But if you've read this kudos to you!

[fatmalovestodraw]

Aug 2nd. It is Mayed’s birthday. Happy birthday to Mayed.

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Oxytocin: my circles are not meant to be perfect.

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11AM. A date with three almonds.

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9pm. Watching Supacell in bed. Good night 🌙🤲🏻

[fatmalovestodraw]

It is 11am. I am at the gym, about to start my workout. A little bit earlier than usual. I am feeling a little nostalgic and a little sad because i had been listening to Max Lugavere talk about his mother’s dementia. And since i am PMSing, it made me think of my mother and all the things we’ve gone through since her diagnosis eight years ago. Alzheimer’s disease scares me. I feel very emotional and teary right now. Hopefully that will change once i start my workout.

[fatmalovestodraw]

Normalize being your own lover first. Speaking love into your skin cells. Slow bathing your body with reverence. Handling your hair gently with care. Consciously saying kind things about yourself. Mindfully cultivating a beautiful expansive mind and thoughtful heart. Own your need for good rest and exercise. Take care to regulate your nervous system. These are natural beauty tips that will improve your physical appearance. Your efforts will become more visible with time, especially the older you get. Your unique physical features become more enhanced from being infused more with love, softness, sweetness, reverence, grace, and gratitude over the years. It's never too late to start normalizing new ways of interacting with yourself, your actual cells. Start today. Begin where you are. You loving yourself changes the energy of your internal waters-- how you look, feel, taste, sound, and the quality of life around you. Hating yourself, hating the body you were born with, as modeled by this world, does the same. In other words, fall in love with your own image.--India Ame'ye, Author

[fatmalovestodraw]

.. simply surviving. ❤

friendly reminder that you didn’t waste your year. any moments of happiness or comfort, any small accomplishments, they all matter. this has been a really hard year, and simply surviving is something to be proud of. 

[fatmalovestodraw]

Dear Tumblr,

I am in the mood to write something long. So here i go:

Yesterday was the first day of the new year. I am happy with how it started; i woke up 40 minutes late. Well, I am on break so of course there is nothing to be late for but the day itself. I always believe that in order to win the day you must wake up early...

I think i just lost my train of thought.

Here, let me try again. Yesterday was a good day because i managed to update my CV and Cover Letter. Print them out with my fancy pink printer. Which means i checked all the boxes from last year's to-do list. Oh, I am so proud and excited.

So, Let me tell you about the cv and cover letter design process. Well, It has been too long since I have sat and designed anything. I thought graphic design was a side of me long gone. Dead. Died with the rest of the other sides that i killed throughout the years. Haha!

Anyways, having been part of the Hiring Committee at my current job, I managed to reflect what i have learned from that onto my cv and cover letter. To be precise and straightforward, even though i have no idea what position i am going to apply for or where.

This post is not a New Year Resolution, I do not make those anymore. It is words, and more of a checking-in. Another year has gone by and i am still alive, healthy and strong. I look forward to another with me doing my best to getting better at living.

If you have read this, I thank you for your time and I wish you good.

Oh wait! This could be a post about the new me..? No? Ok, I guess that will have to wait to materialize in another post.

[fatmalovestodraw]

Some #conceptart I did for #scavengersreign.

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Jon Juarez

[fatmalovestodraw]

Clues to preventing Alzheimer’s come from patient who, despite genetics, evaded disease

Alzheimer’s disease has plagued one large Colombian family for generations, striking down half of its members in the prime of life. But one member of that family evaded what had seemed would be fate: Despite inheriting the genetic defect that caused her relatives to develop dementia in their 40s, she stayed cognitively healthy into her 70s.

Researchers at Washington University School of Medicine in St. Louis now think they know why. A previous study had reported that, unlike her relatives, the woman carried two copies of a rare variant of the APOE gene known as the Christchurch mutation. In this study, researchers used genetically modified mice to show that the Christchurch mutation severs the link between the early phase of Alzheimer’s disease, when a protein called amyloid beta builds up in the brain, and the late phase, when another protein called tau accumulates and cognitive decline sets in. So the woman stayed mentally sharp for decades, even as her brain filled with massive amounts of amyloid. The findings, published in the journal Cell, suggest a new approach to preventing Alzheimer’s dementia.

“Any protective factor is very interesting, because it gives us new clues to how the disease works,” said senior author David M. Holtzman, MD, the Barbara Burton and Reuben M. Morriss III Distinguished Professor of Neurology. “As people get older, many begin to develop some amyloid accumulation in their brains. Initially, they remain cognitively normal. However, after many years the amyloid deposition begins to lead to the accumulation of the tau protein. When this happens, cognitive impairment soon ensues. If we can find a way to mimic the effects of the APOE Christchurch mutation, we may be able to stop people who already are on the path to Alzheimer’s dementia from continuing down that path.”

Alzheimer’s develops over the course of about 30 years. The first two decades or so are silent; amyloid slowly accumulates in the brain without causing ill effects. When amyloid levels reach a tipping point, however, they kick off phase two, which involves multiple interrelated destructive processes: A protein called tau forms tangles that spread through the brain; brain metabolism slows down, and the brain begins to shrink; and people start to experience memory and thinking problems. The disease follows the same pattern in people with genetic and nongenetic forms of Alzheimer’s.

The Colombian families carry a mutation in a gene called presenilin-1 that causes their brains to develop far too much amyloid buildup beginning in their 20s. People who carry the mutation accumulate amyloid so quickly that they reach the tipping point and start showing signs of cognitive decline in middle age. One rare exception is a woman who had more amyloid in her brain in her 70s than her relatives did in their 40s, but only very minimal signs of brain injury and cognitive impairment.

“One of the biggest unanswered questions in the Alzheimer’s field is why amyloid accumulation leads to tau pathology,” Holtzman said. “This woman was very, very unusual in that she had amyloid pathology but not much tau pathology and only very mild cognitive symptoms that came on late. This suggested to us that she might hold clues to this link between amyloid and tau.”

A 2019 study had revealed that, along with a mutation in presenilin-1, the woman also carried the Christchurch mutation in both copies of her APOE gene, another gene associated with Alzheimer’s disease. But with only one person in the world known to have this particular combination of genetic mutations, there were not enough data to prove that the Christchurch mutation was responsible for her remarkable resistance to Alzheimer’s and not simply a coincidental finding.

To solve this puzzle, Holtzman and first author Yun Chen, a graduate student, turned to genetically modified mice. They took mice genetically predisposed to overproduce amyloid and modified them to carry the human APOE gene with the Christchurch mutation. Then, they injected a tiny bit of human tau into the mouse brains. Normally, introducing tau into brains already brimming with amyloid seeds a pathological process in which tau collects into aggregates at the site of injection, followed by the spread of such aggregates to other parts of the brain.

Not so in the mice with the Christchurch mutation. Much like the Colombian woman, the mice developed minor tau pathology despite extensive amyloid plaques. The researchers discovered that the key difference was the activity levels of microglia, the brain’s waste-disposal cells. Microglia tend to cluster around amyloid plaques. In mice with the APOE Christchurch mutation, the microglia surrounding amyloid plaques were revved up and hyperefficient at consuming and disposing of tau aggregates.

“These microglia are taking up the tau and degrading it before tau pathology can spread effectively to the next cell,” Holtzman said. “That blocked much of the downstream process; without tau pathology, you don’t get neurodegeneration, atrophy and cognitive problems. If we can mimic the effect that the mutation is having, we may be able to render amyloid accumulation harmless, or at least much less harmful, and protect people from developing cognitive impairments.”

[fatmalovestodraw]

Tomorrow i shall share my thoughts on today and the new year. And today i will just wish you all a Happy New Year. Good night.

[fatmalovestodraw]

3PM

I am working on a new version of my CV. It's exciting to be designing again. I missed GD. And I missed Tumblr and Tumblring.

[fatmalovestodraw]

End of the year. New beginnings.