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Can I be honest? (Scariest words ever)

It has been about 2000 days since I last wrote on tumblr. I guess no matter how much time goes on there is one reason for me to go back on this. A girl. I prolly should’ve typed this up weeks ago but now feels like a good time to do it. 

“Can I be honest” - Every girl before ruining a day. 

I am going to let that quote start of this post. The past year felt like some bad coming of age tv show where I deal with the immortal question “will they or wont they?”. I tried doing all the stereotypical things that I thought would bridge the gap, late night or early morning calls, driving out of town to hangout, the last ditch get Tiffany’s and hope it works.

I am partly sad that we didn’t workout, okay I am still fucking heart broken but what was different about her, for the first time in so long she made realize what it felt like to be empty. I was in love with an idea , she represented all my shortcomings by going to my dream school, becoming a doctor (lord knows how many times i get asked why I didn’t become one). I thought to myself maybe if I date her, I would be validated. I realized that I still have to work on myself, I gotta be proud of what I’ve done with my career and life. I have a good career and family/friends. Sooooooooooooo 2/3 ain’t bad.

She did do some sketchy shit, and did lead me on for a while and kept that sweet as Tiffany’s bracelet. I see now that if you do love someone or wanna be with someone they will always make an effort for you. It was painfully obvious that i was in love with her and it was one sided like a waterfall.  But hey I fucked up also, i kept wishing and hoping that we would wind up together instead of ending things and moving on. I was afraid that maybe she was the best  I could ever hope for and IT SCARED THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF ME. I feel most angry about all the morning calls to comfort her about her nightmares, or texting her when she was in Australia everyday then becoming invisible once shes back in America. I let this happen, but I know if i meet a girl I’ll do the same for her cuz that makes me happy. 

Bottom line. She moved on, and I am actually happy for her, I am inspired to be the best version of me. I do fucking hate the line “I hope you find someone who takes care of you”. Nah reallllly thanks, it took me 30 years to realize that maybe i do need someone to be there for me.  

Side note. This version of me has an is350f. 

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well then.

Well I suppose I'll plan life after Japan. 6 months!

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The 50 Cheesiest Emo Lyrics Of All Time

Like most people, we love making fun of emo. Because well, emo is funny. So we collected the cheesiest, wussiest, sappiest emo lyrics of all time and put them in one place so we could laugh at them.

How does a lyric make the list? Well, it should be totally cringeworthy. Basically, every time you hear it, you should want to puke your guts out over how cheesy it is. Usually, that consists of some failed attempts at expressions of love. Godawful metaphors also earn points. References to things like hearts, tears, and sadness are also a plus. Basically, anything that sounds like it was written in a college Introductory-Level Creative Writing Class. Some of these are by great musicians. Others are by talentless hacks. Some are by bands that fall into the “emo” genre. Some are just particularly “emo” lyrics.

For help, we teamed up with Tom from WashedUpEmo.com as well as some of our emo-savvy friends, and you, the good people of the Internet, to compile a list of the cheesiest emo lyrics of all time. In no way is this a definitive list. There are enough break ups and lame attempts at similes in the world to hold us over for the rest of eternity. So with that said, feel free to leave any you think we missed in the comments.

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2013

This has been such a weird year and I'm sorry tumblr for forgetting about you. I guess like every year people come and go in life and you learn more about yourself. For me I think I have begun to clear that corner of uncertainty and finally found a path I enjoy. And on that path people I love and enjoy being with. So 2014 the bay, BMW and you know who.

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This is why I love her.

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Your horoscope for today is waiting for you here, Cancer. Click here!

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The Places I have Come to Fear the Most

I am slowly falling in love with this album all over again! I remember listening to this album as a angst ridden teenager and only getting a piece of the puzzle. Now years later after heart break, career set backs, life kicking me in the ass, I get it much more. I could listen to this album and skip no tracks. 

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Jessica’s selcas collection.

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So glad I was named after this amazing man.

My idol

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Who do you think should have the power in the end?

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Rune reading is an ancient form of divination from Ireland, Scotland and Scandinavia. Check this out.

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Class personified. Miss you Ronnie, go win little big ears.

“Happy to win but also sad for Machester United.” #cristiano #ronaldo #championsleague #manchesterunited #realmadrid

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‘all we need is shin-ji ka-ga-wa!’

-old trafford radio ga-ga edit

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This Sticker Will Last Longer Than Your Band