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All this time spent in vain, wasted years, wasted gain

All is lost, hope remains and this war’s not over

There’s a light, there’s a sun

Taking all shattered ones to the place we belong.

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[Picking up Ursa as the Prince's wife]

Ozai: So, you like bad boys?

Ursa: Well.. Yeah, I guess..

Ozai [to Azulon]: Tell her.

Azulon: He’s just literally the worst.

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"preparing him for LIFE ?" She asked, her voice louder yet again, anger visible in her golden eyes. "What you do is not preparing him! You're TORTUTING him, that is what you do!” she exclaimed and clenched her hands to tight fists. She couldn’t understand HOW he could treat his own son like that - like he was worthless and just a simple FAILURE. 

“When you would treat him better you would see that he is not USELESS. He really is trying to please you but you close your eyes and simply IGNORE it! All you see is Azula and how much better she is than Zuko. Ever thought about the fact that it is like that because you never ONCE have a good word for him?” she asked and then shook her head, gaze wandering away from her husband. 

“You just can’t handle the TRUTH” 

“Well well, what a MARVELOUS coincidence. You see, I will NEVER understand how you can treat Zuko the way you do either!” Ozai replied with a tone full of anger and burning eyes of rage. “I am simply trying to PREPARE him for life, while you are coddling him into nothing more but a pampered adornment!”

“Deep down, you know that the boy is useless. You are just letting your pathetic mother instincts take over your mind and body, which blinds you about the TRUTH!” the prince spoke with a voice just as harsh as he intended it to be.

“And don’t you DARE speak about my childhood or my father, your FIRE LORD, if you know what is good for you, and, your pampered adornment.” 

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“I will NEVER understand how you can treat Zuko the way you do.”  Ursa spoke, her words HARSH and maybe a little louder than she wanted them to be. “Is it because the Fire Lord treated you like that when you were just a child? Or is it because you are generally a BAD person?” 

[ @fathercfagnikai - I know u have a hard time with Ozai muse buT I HAD TO I AM SORRY I NEED SOME ANGST??? ]

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AZULA: 

━ ♕ ━━━ ::

        The little firebender kept her eyes on her mother’s as she knelt. Staying quiet, Azula listened to the gentle words being spoken. In a way, all the mischief the small princess would be plotting was somehow washed away when she was around her mother. No training, no martial performances for her grandfather, no taunting her brother.

         It was just her and that kind voice.

        Yet somehow, the prodigy felt that lady before her was more disappointed in her than she would ever be happy with her daughter, even though the words ‘I LOVE YOU ’ would be spoken. Azula’s father may have never said those words to her - but she knew he did by the  way he treated her. He was the one who told her everyday how much potential she had, how proud the Fire Nation would be to have her on the throne after he had gone…

           ❝ Dad says sometimes it’s right to treat Zuzu like that - when he’s saying something that Dad wouldn’t like, ❞ Azula shook off the tender feelings she was suddenly having, after all, her father told her in order to be strong, you must use fear.

            ❝ Zuko deserves it most of the time. ❞ 

Ursa knew that she sometimes treated Azula like she didn’t LOVE her enough. Like she prefered Zuko over her little daughter. But that wasn’t true. She loved both of her children EQUALLY even though she somehow was scared that Azula would end up exactly like Ozai - she didn’t want Azula to be so heartless and CRUEL. She wanted her to feel compassion, to be a little more like Zuko ...

“No, it’s NEVER right to treat him like that” Ursa spoke, her voice still gentle whle she shook her head. A small sigh left her lips and she was quiet for a moment then, just looked at her little daughter. She already WAS so much like her father and that was something Ursa did not like - not at all. 

“He doesn’t deserve to be treated like that Azula, you are better than him with Firebending, your father treats you better than him ... you have to be a little NICER to him, it’s not easy for Zuko ... you could help him with being a little nicer, really .. just a bit” she said and placed her hand on Azulas cheek for a moment. “Can you do that?” 

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She just couldn’t HELP it. He was making her feel things she never felt before, things she didn’t know she could feel in the first place. She had heard things about the first time - that it would be painful and TERRIBLE, but Ursa didn’t feel anything like that. She felt a warmth in her body, and yet there were shivers running up and down her spine, she felt like she was on cloud nine - that she was close to lose her MIND. 

Shaky breaths left her lips, nails running down his back when he quickened his pace. She was sure that she would leave MARKS on him and she dearly hoped that he wouldn’t mind it - that he wouldn’t mind to be marked as hers. Her whole body was trembling with pleasure and desire for MORE of him, for everything he could give her right now and so she raised her legs and wrapped them around his middle attempting to pull him even DEEPER. 

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There was a hint of a blush on her pale cheeks yet again at his words. They managed to make a small smile form on her lips and she lowered her gaze with a soft chuckle. “Thank you -” Ursa then spoke gently before she raised her gaze again only to see that he was holding out his hand for her. Slowly she took a step closer to the prince and then reached out with her hand to take his.

She felt a tingle in the pits of her stomach. Ursa was EXCITED for this evening - the play they were about to see would remind her of her old life, maybe even help her to get over it. And she would share this love for the theatre with the someone she was learning to love - or at least to accept in her life. 

Making their way to the carriage Ursa was quiet till they left the beachouse and the smell of the salty air and water crossed them again. She inhaled and her eyes closed just for a second. This air almost seemed PURE and she couldn’t get enough of it - surely she would miss it as soon as they were back in the Capital. “I am glad you decided to go here with me, I love this place - it is so much more peaceful than the crowded capital -- and I really like the sea .. and of course the theatre” she said while she turned her head to look at the man next to her with a wide smile on her lips and EXCITEMENT glimmering in her eyes. 

“You are right,” Ozai replied to the comment about her needing to change. “I would not.” After walking out of the water, the prince wiped his feet with a small towel before slipping into his sandals. He could not put wet feet inside a dry shoe, that was simply not acceptable. 

Since this theatre was a public place, they both needed to look respectable. After walking back up to the beachhouse, Ozai changed into a light, crimson coloured robe with golden embroidery in the sleeves and waist. Underneath, he wore a simple tunic in matching colours. On his feet, he wore dark, pointy shoes which just covered the feet, no need to wear boots in a weather like this. 

The prince did not care much for jewelry, like his father sometimes did. Everybody already knew that they were royality, no need to showe oodles of golds into their face to prove it. When he was finished getting dressed, the prince headed over to the dressing room where Ursa was. 

A pleasing look hit his eyes as he enterd the room. Ursa was dressed simple, but yet, extravagant enough to be seen with him. Again, she looked so beautiful, that Ozai could not help but smile. Walking over, he reached his hand out for her to take, feeling a GLIMMER of excitement in both her voice and his heart. 

“You look beautiful, Ursa. Now let’s go. I have a carriage waiting for us outside.”

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"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy, when skies are grey. You'll never know dear how much I love you. Oh please don't take. My sunshine. Away."

[ @fathercfagnikai ]

“No one has to take me away – you managed to get rid off me all by yourself” 

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The fact that she didn’t see HIS face in front of her eyes anymore whenever she closed them was a clear sign that Ursa was beginning to ACCEPT her fate and that she really tried to be a good wife - a good and loyal part of the royal family. When she was younger she NEVER though that she would end up standing in the arms of the Prince, she never though that he would be so gentle and nice, and yet -- she was always open for SURPRISES. 

When he pulled back from the kiss she kept her eyes closed and just remained close to his face as well, a small smile forming on her plum lips she nodded a little at his words. The theatre - she had been EXCITED for it since he told her that they would indeed go to see the play. Slowly pulling her hand from his grip she reopened her eyes and lowered her hands to grab the skirt of her light robes. “I have to change at first - I am sure you wouldn’t want your wife to look like THIS when you go out with her” she said and let out a quiet chuckle before she began to walk out of the water. 

The moment her feet touched the dry sand she already missed the feeling of the water around her legs -- missed HIS lips on hers and she turned her head to look at him for a second, giving him a sweet smile before she leaned down to pick up her sandals from the sand. 

Just half an hour later she was ready again. Her brown hair was braided and tucked behind her ears. She wore a dark red and golden robe, again not one she would wear in the palace, this one was light and yet it showed that she was ROYALTY now. Patting down on the fabric she looked at herself in the mirror for a few moments. Pushing a lose strand of hair behind her ear she bit her lower lip before she turned when she heard someone approach her. 

“I am really glad that we will go and see the play, I am sure you will LOVE it” she said, her voice making it obvious that she was looking forward to this evening with him. 

Despite the fact that his heart jumped from her touch, in a way, Ozai FEARED loving Ursa. Love was weakness and something foolish, he had to be strong. Strong for his nation, and strong for his father. The illusion of being in love was not only something powerful that weakened the mind, but was also, a burden. The young male comprehended very well, that if it was not for the fact that Ursa was related to the Avatar before the last airbender, they would probably never have met, and therefore, he had no reason to feel something as trivial as love. He needed her for heirs, and nothing else. 

And yet, Ozai’s mind wandered off in the depht  in her eyes, his heart beating faster with each passing second, pupils dialted, and he felt… Something. Something he knew that he should not feel. From the start, he tried to be not only a good son but also a good husband, and prove, prove to SOMEONE that he was worthy of someone elses love. Ozai understood very well, that even if he was the one who was asked to produce maybe one of the most powerfull lines of firebenders in history, his own father would never love nor respect him. Iroh was, and would always be, the favourite. 

Just like Ursa, Ozai also wondered if what he was doing was alright. The kiss, altough unpredicted, was welcoming, and in the heat of the moment, he never wanted their lips to part again. Yet, the feeling of love being nothing more but a weakness hung over his shoulders like a heavy brick, and he started to feel like a burden himself. This was not someone he was supposed to be, someone who felt love.

Blowing out a hot stream of air from his nostrils, Ozai cracked his eyes open and slowly pulled away from the other’s face, still holding Ursa’s hand in a sturdy grip around his own. Her taste, her touch, the sensation of her warm breath tickling his skin, warm lips tightly pressed against his own… It was wrong, but felt natural. 

“Ursa… We are going to be late to the theatre if we continue like this,” the prince spoke with a gentle, yet firm, tone to his voice, marking that this little exchange of affection was over, for now. Their relatiohship was blossoming into something with the potential of becoming something beautiful. Ozai had a taste of a reality he oh so very much craved, and even of the illusion of love between the two perhaps never would be a fact of exsistence, seeing a small flash of a reality that could have been was more then enough. 

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"I'm sorry I didn't love you enough" [ remember that post you send me once, I just had to -- you know who this is .-. ]

((I can smell you, @fxrelady ))

“I… I am sorry I did not give you anything to love.”

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Swallowing thickly Ursa raised her gaze to look at her son again - the one she had left behind for the sake of SAVING him. She was sure that he knew about it, that Ozai had told him that just to make him feel BAD about himself. But she also hoped that he knew that she did everything in her power to save him. 

At the simple gesture Ursa smiled gently and raised her hand to place it ontop of his. “I am happy that you never gave up to look for me Zuko ...” 

Zuko’s eyes met Ursa’s, his hand falling to his side as he watched hers well up with guilt-ridden tears. He raised his brow, feeling a tinge of guilt for having made his mother blame herself for something that she played no part in. 

He took a few deep breathes, trying to ease himself away from the initial shock of having been reunited with his mother. After all, she needed him, and she needed to know that none of this was her fault. 

Swallowing the last of his shock, Zuko took one final breath before resting his hand on her shoulder. It was an odd gesture, he wasn’t really used to comforting people, but he wanted to show her some semblance of comfort so–and that’s what he thought his mother would have done had she been in his place. 

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Again there was a whimper falling from her lips when she felt his hand under her robes. She didn’t want him to touch her, and she most certainly didn’t want him to touch her THERE. Just a few months ago his touch used to make her skin tingle, made her feel the warmth of his skin -- now it only made her quiver in fear. Eyes squeezing shut she turned her head again, tried to get away from the sound of his BREATHING into her ear.

Of course she was afraid - that was obvious. Her skin was even paler than usual, her heat beating so fast she was scared it might beat out of her chest she turned her head to face him again when he spoke. Wincing when he pinched her -- she felt like he was MOCKING her with what he did. “I never once agreed to be your PROPERTY” the woman hissed out before another sob escaped her throat which was then silenced by the kiss he forced onto her lips. 

The moment he finally got up she quickly moved to sit on the bed pulling her robes down her legs again she looked at him with tears streaming down her face. Keeping her chin up HIGH she did as he told her, raised her hand and wiped the tears away from her cheeks. Now - after what he did, she knew better than to DISOBEY him. 

“thank you...- my lord”  she said with her voice still shaking lightly. She knew he could have done so much WORSE to her. He could have forced himself onto her, could have FORCED her to carry his heirs - but he didn’t. “I will...- learn to behave better” she added to her previous spoken words even though he already was gone out of the door. 

“If you know what is good for you, you shall keep your mouth SHUT,” Ozai spoke, his words harsh but voice sweet. He knew that he was already intimidating her, there was no need for yelling to get his point through. Of course, Ursa’s efforts of pushing him away was futile, the prince was larger and stronger, her small fists would not even BRUISE his pale skin. 

Searching one hand in under her robes, he stroked her naked thighs with the back of his palm, breathing desperately into her ear. He was growing impatient, that was a fact. The illusion of once loving her, together with whatever affection he felt had blown away, and all he wanted to do now was to show Ursa what he was willing to do in case of defiance.

“You are not fooling anyone, Ursa. I know that you are afraid, which you should be.,” he spoke and pinched her cheeks between his thumb and indexfinger. “You made a commitment when you were forced to marry me. A commitment to me, YOUR HUSBAND,” he added and leaned foreward to press a hard kiss onto her lips before pulling away. After getting up from the bed, he corrected his robes and brushed a flicker of dust from the crimson coloured fabric. 

“Whipe your tears, Ursa. I am a monster, yes, but I do believe in second chances. I have given you a taste of what I am capable to do. Do NOT repeat your mistake, because next time, I will demonstrate just how cruel and unforgivefull I can be to those who disobey me or my father’s wishes.”

With those words, the prince turned around and walked out the door, leaving Ursa behind. Right now, he could not even LOOK at her. 

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As much as she wanted to stay calm - the ACCUSATIONS Azula threw at her weren’t true. Ursa DID try to convince Ozai to let them go all together. She FOUGHT for her children as well as she could but in the end she didn’t want to risk THEIR lifes -- not after she had risked her own to save Zuko from a terrible fate. 

“No! You listen to me now!” Ursa suddenly exclaimed, her voice rather harsh, so unlike her normal tone she spoke in. “I risked EVERYTHING for my children to be safe -- I risked it all, and I wanted to take you and Zuko with me when I left. But your father, whom you are like very much ---, threatened to kill us the moment we leave the palace. I am okay with risking my own life but I NEVER would risk the life of my children!” she yelled before she widened her eyes a little, hand raising to cover her mouth for a moment before she reached out with it, stopping only inches away from Azulas face. 

“I am sorry...”

“You are nothing but a coward, Ursa,”

Azula reiterated, her eyes and expression both cold. She didn’t have the mental, or physical energy to deal with traitors and cowards today. Any other person she would have ended by now, shot them down in their path of betrayal.

Was she hesitating because of her own lack of energy, or was it because it was, at the end of the day, her mother.

It must have been her energy. There was no way she could be feeling any emotion at all, let alone one of caring nature, towards this…thing.

“You didn’t even try, woman!”

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A sigh left her lips - it has been HIM who marked him like that. Ursa knew that she shouldn’t have left her children behind with someone like Ozai, but she never had a different choice. It HURT her to see what happened to him, hurt her to see that Ozai never changed --

“I am sorry ... so sorry that I wasn’t there for you Zuko” she said quietly, tears burning in her golden eyes while she spoke. “I should have FOUGHT for you and your sister and not just leave without a fight” lowering her hand from his face she looked at him again. He was so grown up - he wore the headpiece of the Fire Lord with PRIDE and Ursa knew that he was a better leader than his father could ever be. 

Zuko stared in silence for a few moments, his mouth agape as he stared at his mother’s face for the first time in five years. She’d  aged–laugh lines forming around her mouth, and wrinkles forming creases around her eyes–but in her gaze he saw that warm glimmer that had left him for what seemed like an eternity now. 

He sucked in a breath, his heart pounding in a strange mix of shock and excitement. “Mom,” Zuko mouthed, his eyes fixated on hers. 

His mouth quivered as he searched for something to say, but Zuko was unable to find anything fitting for this moment. Instead, he he simply watched as Ursa lifted her hand to his face. 

He turned his gaze to her touch, bringing his hand up  as well to rest on hers. He swallowed at the mention of his father, his brow raised as he watched his mother come to realize the extend of the horrors he’d faced after she had left. 

Being at a loss for words, all Zuko could do was nod his head in affirmation.

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The kisses to her neck made her let out another quiet moan, her eyes were still closed and she just took in the moment as it was - even though she was scared of PAIN that could be inflicted she tried to stay as relaxed as possible. Her hands were on his back, nails digging into his skin when he pressed into her. The whisper in her ear send a shiver down his spine even though she felt that her skin was heating up every passing second. 

Plum lips parted she arched her back a little. There was a bit of pain indeed - but the pain was followed by a wave of pleasure washing over her body like a wave. Ursa wanted to LECTURE herself for feeling this way, wanted to curse her body for making it feel so incredibly good - 

“Yes....yes” she breathed out even though her words sounded more like a moan. She reopened her eyes and let her hands move to his face. Cupping his face she looked into his eyes, a small smile on her features she leaned up a little to press her lips against his again, while she tried to move her hips in unison with his movements. “I’m yours ...” 

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NIER SENTENCE MEME PART TWO.

part one here.

Don’t look back.

You still…recognize me?

You look like shit.

People can’t change overnight. 

I didn’t get much sleep last night.

I’m used to sleeping outside.

Are we gonna die, ( name )?

I’m crying because I don’t want to die.

If they catch me, they will kill me.

They will pay for what they have done!

Anger won’t accomplish anything.

If you are to blame…then I am equally at fault.

Sorry about yesterday. I kinda flew off the handle.

That’s enough! I’ve got a fucking image to maintain.

Maybe we should leave here and go explore the world!

Go away! Dirty, defective swine!

I’m not like you! I’m different!

You again? Stop bothering me.

( name )…I’m sorry…I’m not strong enough.

I…I wanted to be with you forever.

Alive…Stay alive! Stay alive!

There’s no reason for me to exist anymore.

My life is over. Just leave me alone.

I’ll…I’ll be okay. We need to keep going.

I’m fine! Let’s just go…

I’m a…weapon? What does that even mean? …What am I?

Your past makes no difference. I’ll support you no matter what.

I…I can control my abilities now!

No! Don’t! Don’t look at me!

Welcome back, ( name ). You’ve been through a lot.

But…my body…

I can’t stand to be with you when I look like this…

You…you look just like I thought you would.

I was terrified at first, but I think I’m okay with it.

You monster! You possessed monster!

It is YOU who have lost their humanity! You are the true monster!

Why have you done this?! I just wanted to live my life in peace!

…What have I done? I killed innocent people…I killed them all.

I’m coming…Gotta…catch my breath…

Careful, ( name )! It won’t help anyone if we lose you here!

I’ve been feeling a strange presence around here lately.

I see this transformation has not stolen your terrible sense of humor.

It’s just a little welcome-back gift. It’s not much, I know.

Oh, splendid. By all means, let us undertake a murderous rampage.

You must run now. Do you understand? Run as fast as you can.

I am incapable of being lonely. Or missing others. Or crying.

The harvest was weak again this year, and the people are beginning to go hungry.

People are tired and scared, and…I’m sorry. I’m sorry you have to bear the brunt of that.

People are afraid of us. And really, I understand. I mean, look at me.

Stop. Don’t you dare apologize. You had every right to be upset.

I understand why you did what you did. …Even if I don’t agree.

Why did you have to be here?! Why you?! Why are you here?!

Hitting that thing won’t bring ( pronoun ) back…

This is hardly the happy ending I was expecting.

Revenge is a fool’s errand.

I hear your days of bachelorhood/bachelorettehood are coming to a close.

Thank you…for making someone like me your bride/husband.

You’ve grown into a fine example of womanhood/manhood. I’m sure you will make an excellent queen/king.

I insist you stay with me tonight as an honored guest of the royal family.

The duties of a king/queen are overwhelming! 

Finding light in bad times is the mark of a true leader.

A man/woman works better when he/she has something – or someone – to fight for.

I don’t like this. Weddings are festive occasions. …Should I even be here?

I’d like to get married someday.

All right, that’s enough weird questions. Go to sleep.

You raped our forests and poisoned our streams, and now you slaughter our young!

No! Why did you protect me!?

I would rethink this course of action, ( name ). Ahead lies a battle you cannot win.