goeswithmygut

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

You had me at coffee and bandaids. [I chuckled lightly as I joked in reply] And you know, if you want to toss in the occasional kiss too, I wouldn't be opposed to that. [I added with a small but sincere smile. I was relieved that we seemed to get passed the tension for now. At least to the point that we could joke a bit together now] Are you hungry? Maybe we could order some Chinese or whatever you're in the mood for? [I briefly suggested before adding] Then we could watch a movie or something while we eat, if you want. [Wanting Gabby to know that I meant it when I told her I'd rest for the next couple of days. Starting this moment where I intended to just relax on the couch with Gabby until we decided to call it a night in a few hours. Assuming Gabby was planning to crash here tonight]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[I flashed Gabby a real and genuine smile when I heard her words. I knew she was trying now. Sure, communication wasn't always our strong-suit. Between that and selfishness, our relationship had been doomed. Maybe this wasn't another chance for us, though. Don't get me wrong, I was open to it. Obviously, I was because I never stopped loving Gabby, but I also wasn't one who liked to be fussed over either. I hated feeling weak and incapable] I appreciate all of that, and I want you here. If I didn't convey that properly before, I am sorry. I want you here, though, as long as you want to be. [I reiterated. The last thing I wanted was for Gabby to think I didn't want her here. I did. I just didn't want to be treated like in invalid in the process though] And in regard to me returning to work, I promise I will take it easy. I will stay home and rest a couple of days, but come next shift, I arranged with Boden to take desk duty until I'm fully healed up, and cleared to return to truck. [I briefly explained. Wanting to be transparent with Gabby. For a mixture of humor and peace of mind for her though, I quickly added] You won't need to worry about me on the desk. I'll keep my leg elevated, and the biggest worry I'll have for further danger or injury is in the form of a paper cut. [I light joked while a soft grin pulled at the corners of my lips] As far as you visiting me at the desk though, if you don't, I'll be disappointed. [I added with a lingering grin]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

When did I say or even imply that you aren't allowed to care about me? If I didn't want you to care about me, I wouldn't have asked you to be here with me now. [It seemed obvious to me. I mean, back at the hospital, I wanted Gabby there in the exam room with me because having her near made me feel more at ease. That sentiment held true here and now because I wanted Gabby here at my apartment with me too. Still, I never wanted to feel needy or like an obligation to anyone. Gabby had her own life and job too, so the last thing I wanted to do was pull her away from her work. Hence my independent side. For awhile now I've been on my own, so there was also that fact to consider. I was trying though. Just like I knew Gabby was, so I felt like now it was a matter of us meeting each other half way] The truth is, I'm glad you're here, Gabby. I'm also relieved to know you still care about me too. To the point that you want to be here with me and for me. If that wasn't implied, I am sorry. Still, I don't want you to lose sleep or miss work because you're focused on taking care of me. I'd never want to be a hardship to you, Gabby. [Maybe our lines of communication got a little crossed because deep down, I think we both wanted the same thing but we didn't necessarily go about expressing it in the most understood way] As far as me returning to desk work in a few days, though, I just want to assure you that I'll be okay. I know you worry but I can assure you I won't overdue it or push myself into anything I'm not physically ready for.

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[I scoffed slightly after hearing her retort. Even if that wasn’t her intention, it felt like a dig; prompting me to defensively reply] I never said I was perfect. I’m far from it, which I am aware of, Gabby. Still, I’m not a guy who likes to be fussed over. You’ve known this fact about me from the start. You may not like that about me, but I can’t just change how I feel in that. [My way of implying that if she thought she was going to change me in that, she’s wrong. The thing is, Gabby is headstrong and a bit controlling at times. She likes getting her own way, and when she doesn’t, she’s not afraid to show you her frustration in that. She’s also the type of person who tends to jump all into something without fully thinking it through first. As a result of some of our less than redeeming qualities, it’s causes friction between us, and has tore our relationship apart in the past. I hope this time won’t be a recurrence of that] I will be okay. You’ve got nothing to worry about. Trust me, these injuries are nothing compared to some I’ve endured over the years. [I added with a low chuckle. My way of trying to add some lightness in this tense and trying situation]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

I know you are, and I appreciate it. I also know you, so I'm fully aware that it took a lot for you to come over here and admit that you were wrong. [I shared with a gentle smile. I was, in no way, trying to kick her when she was down or rub her nose in it. Far from it. This was my way of conveying to her that I was proud of her] I shouldn't have left the fire house the way I did, either, so in that sense, I'm also wrong. [I admitted. This also not being easy for me to do, but hey, it's a give and take, right?] And, I appreciate that. Look, I know you and the doctors would love nothing more than for me to sit at home here on the couch and do nothing but rest for the next several weeks, but we both know, that's not me. I'll literally go out of my mind if I'm forced to do that. [I started to say in response. Knowing I wasn't telling Gabby anything she didn't already know about me] That said, I need to return to work sooner rather than later. Now, I promise you I won't push myself or overdue it. I wouldn't return to active duty until I was physically ready to do so. I'd never put the team or others at risk by returning before I'm physically able to. That said, I'll work desk duty for the next several weeks until I'm fully healed up. Answering phones, filing, paperwork... Boring stuff. Nothing that will give you reason to worry about me, okay? [I said with a slight grin tugging at my lips as I gave your hand a gentle squeeze]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[Wow… This is a first. Gabby actually realizing she was wrong in a situation. I don’t think that’s ever happened before. Then again, I’m sure there are moments she’s realized she was wrong, but her pride and stubbornness refused to let her admit it. I silently considered as I listened to what she said… Her take on the situation, which was correct. I wanted her here with me, but I wanted her here as someone who loves me and not as an EMT or nurse. I didn’t want her here to fuss over me and nag me if I so much as moved wrong. Her company though, yeah, that’s what I wanted. I loved Gabby so naturally I missed her during our time apart. That said, if she wanted to be here as a means of us working on our relationship and giving “us” another shot, then I was all for it… However, if she was here for any other reason than that, she could go] I don’t need a nurse or an EMT, Gabby… I just want /you/ here. [I said as a means of confirming her epiphany on the situation and circumstances. Giving the sofa a pat as a gesture for her to join me] Look, if it gives you peace of mind, I promise I will take it easy during my recovery. I’ll follow doctor’s orders and let my body heal the way it needs to. [Figuring she needed to hear me say the words aloud. Yes, I could be stubborn, but I wasn’t an idiot. I knew if I didn’t rest and give my body time to heal, my injuries would get worse, which will prolong me getting back into my uniform and to active duty. I couldn’t let the house down and I couldn’t let the chief down either, so I’d do what I needed to… Dot the I’s and cross the T’s and all that if it meant returning to work full time sooner rather than later] When I go back in a few shifts, it’s only for desk duty. I can’t just sit around here for weeks and do nothing though. That will set me crazy. I need to at least feel like I’m doing my part. Even if it’s from a chair with a phone or files in my hand. I’ll take it easy though… I mean, the worst injury I might get while doing that is a paper cut. [I joked as a dry chuckle followed] 

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[As much as I wanted to hold onto my anger toward Gabby, she has this effect on me to where, I just couldn't stay mad at her. Thing was, I didn't like being nagged or coddled. I didn't like the attention. Yes, I was aware that I was injured. I also knew how close I had come to taking my last breath tonight, but regardless of that, I didn't want people to fuss. I just wanted everyone to go on like everything was normal. Sure, I had injuries that needed time to heal, and I'd go through the hoops, so to speak, and follow doctor's orders as well as whatever Boden decides too, but that aside, I didn't want people making a big deal out of it. I knew Gabby loved me and I appreciated her care for me, but even with that, I didn't want the fussing] I know you do... [I aired out quietly as I pressed a tender kiss to the top of her head before parting my lips to add] And I love you, too, but I'm just not one who likes the fussing is all. [Stating the obvious since Gabby knew this about me better than most] If it's any consolation, the agreement I made today with the chief was that I'd rest at home here for the remainder of the week, and then next week I'll return for desk duty. [It was a compromise. Not ideal because if it was up to me, I'd be going to desk duty first thing next shift, but I knew my doctors, the chief, nor Gabby would be comfortable with that] When I return to work for desk duty, I'll even keep my leg elevated while I answer the phones... okay? [A hint of amusement in my tone as I glanced down at her with a slight grin. That last part I meant truthfully, but still, I only said it as a means of putting her mind a bit more at ease. If that was even possible since I had a feeling if it was up to Gabby, I wouldn't work at all for the next couple of months, which let's be clear, wasn't going to happen. I'd lose my mind being stuck in my apartment all day every day for the next eight weeks]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[No matter what, I couldn't be mad at Gabby for long. Let's just say I had a weak spot in my heart for her. That said, as I watched her pace the floor in a mixture of anger and worry toward me, I just remained silent and let her say what was on her heart and mind. Once she finished with a huff, my head bobbed into a single nod of understanding before I balanced myself on my crutches for added support and then once I was steady on them and my good leg, I extended my arms out toward her] For what it's worth, I am sorry I worried you... [Keeping my arms extended as a gesture that I was there to hug her if she wanted or needed one from me] I was tired, in pain, and frustrated over my injuries, so once I finished with the chief, I just wanted to get out of there and get home here to rest. When I left the chief's office to come and find you, I saw you were lost in a game with the guys, so I didn't bother to interrupt. I just left and drove myself home. [I briefly explained. Thing was, I was used to being independent and on my own. I was good at it, so the overbearing, momming me stuff didn't set well with me. Sure, I was trying to be understanding because I knew it was in Gabby's nature to care, but at times, she did overdue it a bit... At least thing time I could see she was giving it her best effort not to be overbearing, which I appreciated]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[I aired out a sigh under my breath when I heard the knock on my front door which was followed by Gabby's voice. Something told me she'd be mad at me for leaving her, but considering she was really focused on her game with the guys when I left, I saw no reason to interrupt her. Besides, I needed to get my truck back to my place somehow anyway, so I took care of it. Either way, I exhaled as I shifted up onto my good leg, and then I grabbed my crutches; positioning them under my arms before hobbling toward the front door to open it. I knew I was about to get an earful from her for this, so I just gave a nod as I opened the door and then I stepped out of the way so Gabby could make her way inside] Come on it. [I said as I waited for her to enter then after closing and locking the front door behind us, I hobbled back over to the sofa, so I could get off my leg. At least I could be mostly relaxed and semi-comfortable while Gabby yells at me]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[After leaving Boden’s office with a plan in mind, I returned to the commons room. Noticing everyone was busy either eating, playing games, or watching TV. Gabby included, in fact, was engrossed in a card game with Severide and Capp. I gave a nod as I continued through the room toward my office. I knew I needed to write up a report of this last call, so I decided to do it now before I went on my short-term leave from work. Taking a seat at my desk before pulling up the other chair so I could prop my injured leg up on while I worked. Once I was situated, I grabbed one of the blank reports from my small filing organizer and a pen, so I could get to work. Seeing as Gabby was busy with her card game, I figured there’s no rush in me getting back home. In fact, I had already made up my mind that once I finished my report, and was ready to go, I’d just drive myself home. For one, the drive wasn’t long, and two, my driving foot was fine, so I knew I’d be fine. I made up my mind as I worked on the report. After I finished and double checked everything, I left my desk area; noticing Gabby, Severide, and Capp were still focused on their game, so after I dropped the report off to Boden and told him I’d see him in a few days, I left the firehouse; making my way to my awaiting truck and then carefully getting into the driver’s seat. Once I had my crutches secured beside me in the passenger’s seat, I started up my truck, put it into gear, and drove away from the firehouse, arriving at my apartment building a few minutes later. After I pulled my truck into my assigned parking place, I cut the engine and exited the truck. Balancing on my good leg as I put my bag across my shoulder and chest before grabbing my crutches and getting balanced on them. Before long, I made it to my designated floor, unlocked my apartment door, then locked it behind me after I made my way inside. I tossed my bag into the chair adjacent from the sofa, grabbed myself a bottle of water, and then I got comfortable on the sofa. I propped my boot up onto some pillows I had placed on the coffee table in order to elevate my injured foot, and then I turned the TV on. Figuring I’d relax and watch a hockey game that was on since I couldn’t do much else at the moment]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

Yes, Gabby, I am aware of that, and if I need help, I will ask for it. I already told you that I would, but at the moment, you're pushing too much. You and I both know that I've been through worse injuries than this one. It's minor, in comparison, and I already told you that I am willing to rest for a few days, and then be on desk duty until I'm cleared to return to work. I'm not an idiot. I know I can't work with my current injuries, so what is it that you want to hear? [I asked. I wasn't in the mood for this. I was injured and hurting currently. I hated hospitals and being fussed over, and yet that's exactly what Gabby was trying to do now. Fussing and nagging. It felt like she was trying too hard simply because she felt guilty over our last break up. At the moment though, her words, actions, and nagging weren't making me want to try again with her. I had enough bosses in my life, and people telling me what I can and can't do... I didn't want that coming from the woman I love too. I thought to myself as the ambo pulled to a stop in the garage of the station. Once Sylvie opened the doors for us, I slowly maneuvered out of the ambo; getting my crutches situated under my arms before I started toward the door leading into the common room] I'll see you after I speak with Boden. [I said to Gabby as I opened the door and then maneuvered inside to the common room. The room was empty currently since the others were out on a call, so I made my way straight to Boden's office, so I could update him on my health, speak to him about desk duty, and then to give him my medical paperwork that was given to me by the hospital for his records. Fortunately Boden agreed on the desk duty; informing me that I could return the next shift, which was a couple of days from now. I was satisfied with that. I'd humor Gabby and rest for the next couple of days at home, and then once I returned to work, I could rest behind a desk and phone here at the station. Eh, it wasn't ideal, but it was better than just sitting at home driving myself crazy over the next several weeks, so I'd take it]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[I didn’t like having limits put on me. I was the one who was used to taking care of others, and doing the saving, so to speak. That said, I never felt comfortable with people trying to take care of me; especially when people tried to fuss over my sickness or injury. I was a firefighter, so injuries came with the job, you could say. I was used to getting hurt, and I bounced back fairly quickly when I did. Sure, the chief would force me to take the necessary time off of work, and I respectfully did so. At least until the doctor signed off on my papers to return, so I didn’t need Gabby reminding me to rest for a few days before returning to work even for desk duty. I loved Gabby, but I had been on my own for awhile now. I was more than capable of taking care of myself. The last thing I wanted was for Gabby to fuss over me] I will return to desk duty when I feel up to it, and to the job once the doctor signs off on me  doing so. [I knew the whole returning to lieutenant duty would be a good six to eight weeks out, given my ankle injury, but regardless, I didn’t need Gabby’s reminder of that. I silently thought as we made our way outside to the ambulance bay. Good timing too since Brett was pulling up moments later to drop off the last victim from the fire. On her cue, we loaded into the back of the ambo; preparing for the ride back to the firehouse, so I could talk with the chief about my injury and forced time off. Once I got situated in the back of the ambo, I lifted my injured leg up onto the seat beside me; figuring I’d keep it elevated while I could since it was currently bugging me with the pain. A fact I’d keep to myself because I didn’t want Gabby to worry anymore than she already was]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[This whole situation wasn’t ideal. Gabby and I had broken up, and things had been really awkward between us lately. Then I got hurt in that warehouse fire when the ceiling collapsed and suddenly Gabby was telling me how much she still loved me. As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t shake the feeling that she was feeling this way because of how close I had come to dying tonight. It felt like a worry induced “I love you,” which concerned me since those rarely lasted, but I guess it was a wait and see at this point in time. My point being, my concerns aside, I wanted to try again with Gabby, so given that I was on the mend currently, it would give Gabby and I the chance to talk this out back at my place, and hopefully figure out what we both really want out of this. Mind you, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t hoping it was real and that it would actually work out between us this time again, but again, the jury was still out on that one. In the meantime we’d just take it one day at a time. I thought to myself as I got situated on the crutches, and then hobbled out of the examination room; making my way toward the ED exit] That works. When we reach the station, I should head inside and make sure the chief knows I need a short leave of absence while I heal. At least a leave from truck. I can still work the desk until my leg heals. [Yes, I knew I Maggie’s orders were for me to rest for the next couple of days, so I’d at least humor her and Gabby by doing that, but after that, I was returning to work; even if it was only on desk duty. I had to. Otherwise I’d be going stir crazy at home. I silently considered as I made my way outside; waiting at the ambo drop off area for the ambo to arrive to pick us up from here]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[I was done with the back and forth nonsense Gabby and I had been juggling with our relationship over the last few years. I loved Gabby, so each time she wanted me back, I gladly fell into her arms. Still, it was getting too much to handle at this point in time. Each time Gabby left me again, it broke my heart that much more than before. All that to say, as much as I wanted Gabby and I to work out this time around, if we ended up breaking up again, I told myself it might be time to call it. As much as we both loved each other, it might be time to face the reality that we might not be meant to be together forever. Time would tell on that though] Don't worry, your secret's safe with me. I won't tell Brett. [I joked lightly in response to Gabby's confession. Before long Maggie entered the exam room with her discharge paperwork] Not a moment too soon, Maggie. No offense, but I'm more than ready to get out of here. [I said to Maggie with a smile as I signed off on the paperwork, and then slowly and carefully shifted onto my feet] "Where do you think you're going? You have crutches to get acquainted with." [Maggie said with a playful tone, but I merely groaned in response. I hated crutches, but I knew Maggie nor Gabby either one would let me get out of here without the crutches. Making a face as I took the crutches from her grasp then got situated on them] Fine. I'll use them for today, but no promises after that. [Hey, they were lucky I was agreeing to that much] "Two weeks minimum." [Maggie said in clarification which just prompted me to scoff in response. Yeah, that wouldn't be happening, but Maggie didn't need to know that] Thanks for everything, Maggie. [I said with a warm smile as I started toward the exit; beyond ready to get out of here. I thought to myself as I paused briefly in the doorway to glance over at Gabby with a smile] Let's get home.

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[Old habits die hard. A saying that could hold true when it comes to Gabby and my romantic history. It always seemed like we'd take one step forward in our relationship, and then a wedge would come in between us, which would send us several steps back. Gabby and I had been down this road together so many times before, so as much as I wanted to believe it would work this time around, I was reluctant to believe it, at best. Regardless of my hesitations and concerns though, I agreed to let Gabby crash with me for a couple of days while I recover from my injuries. Of course I couldn't help but to wonder if this all spanned solely out of Gabby's fears from my near-death experience, and once the rush of it passes, Gabby will have realized this wasn't actually what she wanted, but time would tell on all of that] I'm good with you staying at my place with me. The way I see it, it's just as much your place as it is mine. [I added with a reassuring nod. I knew Gabby and I had our torrid history and all, but home just hasn't felt as much like home since Gabby was staying there with me] Besides, it will be nice having you around. The house hasn't been the same without you... It will also be nice getting to spend some time together. It's been awhile. [I admitted. Hoping that wasn't a mistake to admit that, but it was the truth nonetheless]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

Gabby, you're a great paramedic. In my slightly biased opinion, I'd call you the best, but I don't want you staying there with me as a paramedic. I just want /you/ there with me. The woman I love. It's all I want and need. [I wasn't usually the sappy sort. I was typically a man of very few words, but in this moment, I felt like it was necessary to say. A lot had happened tonight, and if anything, it was another reminder that life is short. In a second everything could change, so maybe this was one of those times where I felt like putting the cards out on the table was best] And, I promise not to over-exert myself. Not that I'd admit this to most people, but I'm feeling pretty sore at the moment. My point being, the only thing I want right now is for the two of us to cuddle up together on the sofa, or even in the bed. Working or doing anything that would involve much movement is the last thing on my mind currently. [My way of promising Gabby that I won't do anything stupid in order to make her regret pulling strings to get me an early release from here. Sure, in the next few days I'd be getting antsy, and would be rearing to get back to work, but at the moment, all of that was the last thing on my mind]

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.

[goeswithmygut]

@ofheroicmedic

[Knowing Gabby the way that I did, I had a feeling she'd be coming to the apartment to crash for a bit while I was healing up. Grant it, my injuries were pretty minor, considering what the turn out could have been, but regardless, Gabby would insist on being the one to ensure I bounced back as well as possible. No complaints from me either because I missed having Gabby around. I guess more than anything though, I was just confused. Sure, Gabby and I had our ups and downs... We had a torrid history, you could say. One where we never seemed to find the right timing, or even the way to make us mesh. It always felt like just when things would fall into place for us, something or someone would drive a wedge into it, which managed to push us apart. I guess I kept telling myself that it shouldn't be that difficult. If we were right for each other, it shouldn't be that hard. Then I nearly died in that warehouse explosion, and suddenly Gabby was here. As much as I wanted to jump for joy, metaphorically speaking and not literally, to be clear, but I guess I couldn't help but to wonder when the ball would drop, so to speak. When Gabby would realize I'm not who or what she wants after all, and we go our separate ways again. I mean, so far I haven't been the one who's managed to make her happy, except for a fleeting moment or two, so I didn't have much hope that I'd succeed this time around either. Time would tell on that though] No complaints from me. I might not like being fussed over, but for you, I might consider making an exception. [I aired out with a teasing smile as I wrapped my arm around her shoulder to hold her close] Now as my personal paramedic, any chance you've got some pull to get me an early discharge from here? My bed is a hell of a lot more comfortable than this one.

continued

@goeswithmygut

Paramedic, or firefighter give or take it was all risk. Gabby always knew her passions, her ambitious would land her here. At putting herself on the line for other people. She’s seen enough; the close calls, the firefighters running into flames day in and day out. But it felt different now that she formed attachments to the people she worked with. She didn’t go home at night and shut her mind off. She never stopped wondering if the firefighters were okay; if she was needed on a call. 51 was her family; she saw more of their faces than her own family; excluding Antonio because let’s be honest he always found a way to stop by. 

Point was; she felt the ache each time Boden called an order to leave, she held her breath each time she heard the shaken voice of Casey through the radio, today was one of those times. We were in limo neither of us understood where our relationship stood. It was my fault, I was the one who wanted space. I was the one who wanted time to process how I felt, what I wanted for a future. I loved Matt, I knew he was the one I wanted to be with, since the day I first laid eyes on him. Yet when we experienced the loss, the loss of a child I felt like I needed space to grable with what felt right. He once told me I was the only thing that made sense to him. And I was starting to think he was right. We could go through the wild wave, the wave of the unknown, of risk but as long as we had each other to fall back on I felt we’d be okay. 

Today was a close call, I swore I felt the air leave my body. I felt like I couldn’t breathe with feet glued to the pavement. I heard voices all felt like a blur in my head. I was only focused on his last words, I was focused on the idea of seeing him again. I didn’t feel like I was myself until I saw him. Until I saw Herrmann, until I saw Severide and the team helping to escort Matt closer to the ambulance bay; enough for me to find my way of walking again. Or in my case the leap I wanted to take until my hand could wrap around his own. I met Herrmann as my arm came to wrap around his waist as an aid to the tuck. 

Jokes, I wasn’t amused; but I also knew the male. The man that had captured my heart a long time ago. He wanted to make a dry joke about the situation at hand. Brunette locks pushed behind my shoulder as I had waited to let go of Casey until he was securely sat on the edge of the truck. Glancing to the other ambulance where Brett was tending to some of the other firefighters. 

Forcing brown eyes to face him; he still managed to take my breath away. A low voice spoke attempting to stay calm for him. “ Promise you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.” A request although Gabby could read his movements like a book if he flitched it meant he was in pain. Hands lowered down to take a look at his leg, gently her palms grasped hold of his lower leg; it felt tender, sore, she didn’t need to lift the pant leg to know he was gonna bruise up. Gabby wanted to focus on his recovery before they even began to figure out their own next steps; he was the love of her life; and she’d be damn if she decided to be stupid again. 

Leaning on her knees, knee touching the pavement; her head tilted up attempting to see how much pain the male was in; he had a tell; at least for her.