her-cruelty-commands

[her-cruelty-commands]

Use this link to get a month free to my fansly 😉🖤

[her-cruelty-commands]

I finally made one

[her-cruelty-commands]

“Life has no meaning a priori. Before you come alive, life is nothing; it is up to you to give it a meaning, and value is nothing but the meaning that you choose.”

— Jean-Paul Sartre, Existentialism is a Humanism

[her-cruelty-commands]

Biographie divine de Dick par Crumb. Anamnèse et gnose.

[her-cruelty-commands]

'Ti's the season to get out Demonia Nymphe.

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current core paradigm - condensed

Ultimate Reality can be communed with but not communicated, not even to the rational, thinking part of yourself.

"True Will" is a state of constant conscious choice to exist in a most fundamental manner you decide to be informed by a sense of what communion meant to you.

By committing totally to one person and her will, I achieve selflessness and joy at experiencing reality in a way not determined entirely by me.

By stating my goal to be her well-being, trusting her to preserve mine within the bounds of her sadistic whims, I focus my effort away from the demands of the ego.

I don't question my decision and my promises to her, any doubt is the ego's demand for easy pleasure.

My desire and love for her follow from my first decision upon knowing: She is worthy of devotion and servitude under her conditions.

By giving up self-determination in some parts, I receive greater freedom to act in others.

[her-cruelty-commands]

“Speaking takes on a malevolent set of gestures that bode no good. It is sportified. Speakers seek to pile up points: there is no conversation that is not infiltrated like a poison by an opportunity to compete. The emotions, which in conversation worthy of human beings were engaged in the subject discussed, are now harnessed to an obstinate insistence on being right, regardless of the relevance of what is said.”

— Theodor W. Adorno, Minima Moralia, 90

[her-cruelty-commands]

who or what am I

I am my domme's loyal submissive, that is my first defining characteristic.

I am hers and hers alone and I make it my purpose in life to ease her existence any way I am allowed.

Abstract:

Name: T.

Age: Says 39 on my ID, but I feel like I oscillate between toddler and mummy

Occupation: Servant, scribbler, scholar, relapsed mystic. Everything else is fleeting.

Orientation: I don't feel comfortable defining this anymore. I am a masochist in the "You read Von Sacher-Masoch's Venus in Furs and realize you're that guy" sense. The feminine attracts me.

Location: Germany. I'm German. It's not something I relish. I miss the Weimar Republic. Beating nazi ass in the streets as lived politics.

Gender: Born with a peen. I don't get invested in any conception of what that's supposed to determine about who I am. I'm a person. Everybody's people and free to determine who they are.

I am finding a way back to lived philosophy, mystic experiences, ego-manipulation and magickal practices.

I'm based in chaos magick, by way of Hine, rather than Carroll, but I respect Carroll for his foundational work.

“Absorb what is useful, discard what is useless and add what is specifically your own” - Bruce Lee

I have no attachment to any single tradition, but I am most versed in the Western Esoteric Tradition, Hermetic thought and how to structure ritual workings. I'm not an expert. I absorb things in a way that makes sense to me, not to teach, or boast about my expertise.

I'm interested in underlying structures of manipulating ego and reality and how to achieve full concord with "true will", or whatever other framing you may choose to describe it.

I've been influenced by many different philosophical, mystic and esoteric traditions.

My worldview is currently between Zhuāngzǐ, a gnosticism not so butt-hurt over being trapped in this reality, Hermeticism and back to basics platonism as I interpret it.

As I'll write about this in tiring detail, I'll leave it at this.

About everything else you can just ask me.