imbetterthanephraim-blog

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"My name is Erk. I'm just a wandering mage from Elibe, set to learn more about the different arts of magic. Do you know a 'Lute'? She tends to pester me at times."

Ah. A scholar of the arcane are you? We do not have nearly enough in the army, something I've been planing to fix. Something always seems to come up.

Lute? Oh, yes. We've met. Rather full of herself, she has the power to back it up I suppose. Princess Eirika knows her better than I do though.

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Yes. There names are Sam and Dean Winchester. ...You do not like my choice of heir, do you?

Does the man even have children yet? I merely believe you should wait or at least name someone you know can take over your duties. If you name one of your own children, you at least know what they are like.

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"You must be the King of Frelia, am I correct? It's an honor to meet someone of your stature."

Yes. That would be I. And you are?

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You have children? I was not aware of this.

I will advise them to try not to kill anyone then. If Ephraim's knights try to kill them they will of course fight back just as hard and dirty. Naturally, we will have a strong force with us.

If you insist on leading the charge... oh very well. I will assign some men to do the killing for you.

Ah. Is that so? It is not my place to comment on who you name as heir so I shall not.

heroineintraining said: I personally do not want to kill anyone, especially Ephraim…he is still my brother. I believe I may have convinced Seth by appealing to his…paternal side. Ah, I’m still not sure how I can repay you for this…

Then I will ensure that you stay behind the enemy lines so you don’t have to. I will inform my men that killing Ephraim is out of the question.

Ah, yes I saw that. I suppose you do not plan on having children yourself? Nevermind, I’m getting sidetracked.

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heroineintraining replied to your post: Oh, I get it! You want exclusive kissing rights.

Ah…This is awkward. I…don’t know if I can…well, let’s just see what happens.

...Indeed. Is that not what I was trying to say earlier?

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Oh, I get it! You want exclusive kissing rights.

..yes. that is exactly it.

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heroineintraining said: I personally do not want to kill anyone, especially Ephraim…he is still my brother. I believe I may have convinced Seth by appealing to his…paternal side. Ah, I’m still not sure how I can repay you for this…

Then I will ensure that you stay behind the enemy lines so you don't have to. I will inform my men that killing Ephraim is out of the question.

Ah, yes I saw that. I suppose you do not plan on having children yourself? Nevermind, I'm getting sidetracked.

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fuckyeahephraim replied to your post: fuckyeahephraim said: UM EXCUSE YOU NO OKAY NO...

REASON NUMBER ONLY WHY THAT’S BULLSHIT: I’M EPHRAIM YOU’RE NOT

Make fun of my spelling all you want. Your grammar is awful.

heroineintraining replied to your post: fuckyeahephraim said: UM EXCUSE YOU NO OKAY NO...

Indeed.

My thoughts exactly.

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fuckyeahephraim said: UM EXCUSE YOU NO OKAY NO IT’S ON LIKE FUCKING DONKEY KONG

Reason number one why we are going to win and you are going to lose:

You use the phrase it's on like fucking donkey kong.

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heroineintraining said: I refuse to kill anyone. For this to be a proper coup, I need Renais’ military…I have to convince Seth somehow. …”Payment?” Do you want land, or money? I’m not sure I am able to give that…

When you say you don't want to kill anyone... do you mean just Ephraim or do you mean anyone on his side? And you yourself or everyone on your side is not allowed to kill?

I don't think surviving for x amount of turns is going to get your throne back, my dear. And good luck with convincing him to go with this plan. Inform him that I am backing you in this endeavour. 

As for Payment. Don't you worry about that right now. We will work something out afterwards. 

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I'm doing well, but Innes...I ask that you listen to my appeal. I am beginning to think that my brother may not be a suitable guardian for Renais, and I have asked him if he would give me the throne. I foolishly added that if he did not, I would organize a coup against him. If I do so, I will need aid. Innes, I ask you, both as a friend and as a king, to help me. Your tactical brilliance is well-known, and I will need support. All I can offer you is an alliance with Renais if you help me.

Well I'm glad you finally came to your senses. I will of course graciously come to your aid, if only to get that idiot off the throne. Exactly how far are you willing to go with this plan? I need to know so I might begin preparations immediately. I will accept an alliance with Renais as payment for now. I'm sure we can work out something else.

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Innes, I thought you would like to be informed of our inevitable marriage. As you are perfect, I have decided you must be my wife. I will be sending the ring through the mail.

I regret to inform that am in fact male and as such cannot be one's wife. You are correct in that I am perfect but I am afraid this marriage will not happen. Especially not if you do not know my gender, one must get to know their partner first. Sending the ring through the mail is probably not a good plan even if I was going to marry you. Things get lost very easily I hate to think that something you spent so much money on getting lost forever.

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ahaha. Aren't you cute? I am King Innes of Frelia, I am world renown for my prowess with both a bow and tactics. You are the one who doesn't stand a chance.

As if I would have anything to do with that waste of space.

When I am through with you, you’ll be nothing but a pin cushion.

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Thank St. Latona for that. More than one Ephraim? I shudder at the thought. And I'm sure I can beat you blindfolded.

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As if I would have anything to do with that waste of space.

When I am through with you, you'll be nothing but a pin cushion.

Anonymous asked: My name is King Innes of Frelia. This is a formal challenge to a battle. The prize: Eirika’s devotion. I will not allow you to lay your dirty plebeian little hands on my friend. ps. Ephraim is a loser and so are you. xoxo

Look, another one of Ephraim’s delightful group. I’ll have you know my skills are second to none, so you’re in for the fight of your life, you pest!

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I am not entirely sure what is happening here. Or why you would send me this Eirika.

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How have you been, Innes? It's been a while.

I am quite well. And yourself? I apologize for the late response I was away on duty.