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I have to agree with this. I love smutty fanfic, but sometimes the character gets so lost that it feels like you're reading about random ppl rather than a fanfic.

nothing but respect for our troops (smut writers) but listen. i dont want to be the person to tell you this, but not every character is going to be a dom or a sub. some people. and i know this is hard to hear. but some people do have vanilla sex. and some of those people might even be The Character.

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When I saw the Catch 22 trailer something looked uncanny yet familiar about this face he made.

Every time they showed this clip in a promo it bugged the heck outta me because I couldn't put my finger on it! Then it hit me!! It reminded me of the CGI zombies from 'I Am Legend"!

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Rewatching Supernatural episodes. This aged unfortunately well! I can't believe I didn't remember this when the pandemic happened.

Context: This episode aired in 2009. Dean is sent 5 years into the future (2014) where the "Croatian" virus has devastated the world.

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Sometimes being in a fandom seems to make people forget basic things. Like...

IT'S OKAY TO DISLIKE A LOVED CHARACTER.

and alternatively

IT'S OKAY TO LIKE A HATED CHARACTER.

Your like or dislike of a character is not a direct reflection of you as a person. I've found that (some) people in fandom spaces can get overparticular and start to use gross generalizations to assume a personas morality, ideals, or beliefs based on what fictional characters they like or dislike. Liking a "villian" in a story does not make you a bad person anymore than liking the "hero" makes someone a good person. Those words are suggestive by nature anyway.

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this is how this scene went right

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Two Bitter-Sweet Tales of Christmas, Sex, and Death.

I know Christmas is over but I was rummaging through my old JGV collection and came across Romance Two. I forgot just how much I loved this film! Specifically scenes 2 and 4! Care to reminisce with me? LEEEETS GO!

Scene 2: "Eternal lovers" Kai X Tsubasa (aka Misaki):

Tsubasa is all alone on Christmas! He's got deadlines to meet and nothing planned! Are you really going to spend Christmas by yourself this year?

I don't want to hear it about the flip phone! It was a different time (2011 to be exact)! LMAO!

Oh? It looks like you're missing someone...

Its Kai! Aww, poor Tsubasa! I wonder where he could be....

Its Kai! This isn't going to be a lonely Christmas for our Tsubasa after all! 🥰🎄

Honestly Tusbasa...same! Lmao!

I miss the old tumblr days when I could just show my favorite scenes but instead, I'll have to use my words and a few heavily censored pics...damn you censorship! Okay here goes..

Kai and Tsubasa reunite. Embracing each other lovingly and letting their bodies become one. We see that Tsubasa missed Kai with all his heart, unable to take his eyes or hands off his lover. The only thing on his mind is enjoying the moment and letting his desires be fulfilled, Tsubasa shows us again how he earned the title of "Most Erotic" more than once. Kai is not to be overlooked here either. The joy and playfulness in his expressions as he allows Tsubasa to initiate lovemaking is nothing less than sweet. A scene worthy of multiple rewatches to be sure.

How was that? Did I paint a decent picture? Here's your hella censored pics!

I'm so happy for them!

BUT WAIT!!! Whats this???....

Tsubasa awakens to the sound of the doorbell ringing. It...was all a dream?!

That was a helluva dream Tsubasa. Anyway, who dat is at the door? Oh...Just a delivery man with a post-dated letter.

I wonder who it's from?

Its from Kai of course, written months ago he tells Tsubasa that he knows he's no longer with him by the time the letter gets to him. Kia has since passed away from an illness. He reminisces about old times and tells Tsubasa not to work so hard. He tells him to look to the future and consider moving on with someone else. He hopes that Tsubasa isn't spending his Christmas alone and thanks him for the time they spent together. 😭😭😭😭😭

Such a touching scene with a gut punch at the end. Well, hang on for this next one.

Scene 4: "The Last Lover" Yuto X Yuta

We enter with a homeless Yuta wandering the streets on a cold winters night. Poor thing has no food and no money. He's desprate enough to drink from the trash! Grody to the max!

To make it worse, he bumps into a stranger and tumbles down a flight of stairs!

He awakes in a room with the stranger who caused his fall.

Yuta thinks this guy is super weird, asking why he bought him there. He doesn't get a straight answer and loosely translated Yuta is like "are you crazy? did you kidnap me? Just so you know, you're not going to get anything from kidnapping me."

Yuto says some cryptic stuff and Yuta is like "whatever, I'm going home" Yuto replies (and I thought at the same time) "but you don't have a home..." LMAO!

Yuto offers to buy him food as an apology for knocking him down the stairs, so of course he stays.

After eating Yuta says he's going home again, and Yuto reminds him he doesn't have a home again. Yuta, just say you're leaving! Yuto tells him it's really cold and that there is an extra bed he can sleep in. Yuta calls him weird again but accepts the offer.

After settling into bed Yuto asks Yuta why he's alone and if he has any friends or lovers. Yuta tells him he's always been alone and is fine with it. Yuto confesses he has also been alone for a long time. This seems to strike a chord with Yuta as he joins Yuto in bed.

Yuto asks him why he did that, Yuta says its because he's cold. Yuto asks if it's actually because he's lonely. He then mentions he doesn't know what to do in a situation like this, so Yuta shows him.

Yuto is confused. Yuta mentions it's what you do when your lonely, and thus the sexy times begin!

Yuta bottoms in this scene and also takes the lead. Confidently setting the pace while ensuring his partners comfort level. Unlike with Tsubasa and Kai, Yuta and Yuto's characters are strangers so their sex isn't as intimate and passionate. It's interesting to see the difference between sex and lovemaking. Here we see pleasure. We see two people who are lonely and craving affection offer their bodies to one another. Side note, Yuta has amazing skin. I am jealous of how his entire body is one color. So smooth, so even!

Afterwards Yuto askes Yuta to be with him so they won't be lonely anymore. Then the twist comes and we find out that Yuta died from his fall. I've heard of death fucking with people, but not fucking people! lol! Actually, I'm not certain if Yuto is supposed to be death or if he is just also dead. Either way, they can be together forever! Awww....I think?

Whelp! Thanks for taking a trip down memory lane with me. Here are the (translated synopsis of the other two scenes in the film"

1. "Limited-time lovers": Lovers for only six months. Jin X Kakeru started dating after making some unusual promises. And now that they've finally reached their final night together...

3. "Forbidden Lovers": Teru is busy preparing to spend Christmas Eve alone. The older brother (Sou Natsukawa AKA Hayate) never comes home. Will the two of them be able to spend Christmas Eve together?

You can find the full movie online:

https://noodlemagazine.com/watch/243084193_169462787

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This cupid duck reminds me of (book) Armand, the curly auburn haired michivuous botticelli angel. ^_^

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Why Do (Some) Straight Women Produce and Consume Gay Media? A Think Piece-

AMC's Interview With The Vampire Season 2 is about to wrap up. Once again, the fact that "The Vampire Chronicles", (which is well known for its homoeroticism) was written by a woman and the fandom is largely composed of women has brought back the questions: "Why do straight women write stories centering gay men?", "Why do straight women ship straight male characters together?", and of course "Why do straight women like BL and gay porn?" These questions are often followed by criticisms, judgment, and accusations. Well, as a woman who has consumed homoerotic/romantic media involving men, I would like to share with you my self-assessment and input.

We need to get a few disclaimers out of the way first:

To start, this is the internet so I feel like I need to point out that when I say "straight women" I mean some, not all. it also needs to be said that I am just a random person. I am expressing my opinion and sharing my perspective on this topic as a Graysexual, Hetero-Romantic, Cisgender Woman, who sometimes consumes homoerotic and romantic content involving men. The following is a assessment drawn from looking inward at myself and assessing the actions of others. My words are my own and I do not speak for all (or really any) women.

it goes without saying that anyone can enjoy any story. Not being a part of a community does not mean you cannot or should not enjoy the stories that come from them. Sharing stories is a way humans connect, teach, and learn. However...

A gay man being uncomfortable or feeling fetishized when straight women write gay romances, ship men together, or watch gay porn is VALID. The fetishization of people in the LGBTQIA+ community happens regularly. The fact is, some women are weird, creepy, and even downright disrespectful. Some women do have a fetish for gay men and gay relationships and this post is in no way suggesting those people don't exist. Fetishization is also very prominent in communities of color and, as a woman of color myself, I have experienced this firsthand and understand that icky feeling. It is harmful, hurtful, and is something I plan on making a post about in the future. Fetishization is the flipside of any "ism" or "phobia". Take a celebrities for example. Both fans and anti-fans are two sides of the same coin. They follow, interact with, talk about, and even obsess over the celebrity, but one is motivated by positivity and the other by negativity. It's the same with fetishization, both "phobes"/"ists" and fetishizers dehumanize a person based on superficial characteristics, ignorance, and stereotypes. One manifests itself in hate and the other in obsession (sexual or otherwise). This post specifically will examine why a woman who DOES NOT have a fetish for gay men/relationships would compose or enjoy homoerotic media.

Let's start with the question: "Why do women write stories (erotic or otherwise), centering around gay men?"

TLDR: Ease, Escapism, Heterosexuality, and just a touch of Self Hate:

Growing up I loved writing. I wrote many short stories and, like Anne Rice (author of Interview With The Vampire), almost all my protagonists were male. Some of them were gay. Why is that? As women, we have to learn to deal with and battle self-hate. This is true for any minority. When you grow up an outlier, you have to contend with hate, both blatant and inadvertent, that seeps into you from all directions. It becomes easy to write a story from the perspective of the standard, the accepted, and the free. Not only were a lot of my characters men, many of them were not black either. Although I didn't realize it at the time, doing this was a type of escapism. The opportunity to imagine existing without being bound by social and societal limitations. Just changing your Gender can allow you to live in a different time and still be seen as a person. Imagine traveling freely without thinking about the limitations and consequences a person of your race, religion, or disability might face. You also don't have to adjust your writing to justify how your character is allowed in their setting because realistically they would never be accepted or permitted.

Anne herself said this about writing Lestat DeLioncourt, that he was the man she "secretly wanted to be", pointing out that he was free to do the things he wanted without the limitations of being a woman. We see this a lot in written media. Think of "The Outsiders", "Harry Potter", and "Frankenstein". None romantic, but all best-selling books surrounding male protagonists, but written by women.

As for why a lot of women write gay male characters specifically, I think it mostly has to do with self-insertion, but also that escapism again. Moving back to Anne specifically, both Louis and Lestat were self-insert characters, and even though their genders don't match her own, they are still her and thus attracted to men. Honestly, I feel like sometimes it's that simple. Not only that, but when both characters are men, you don't see that societal power imbalance that you naturally see between men and women. Neither of them treats the other "like a woman". They are naturally equals and that alone provides an escapist romance. (When I say naturally equals I mean at a base level excluding things like class, race, etc.)

Next Question: Why do women fantasize about and ship straight male characters in gay relationships?

TL:DR Because they're basically already in an ideal platonic relationship. The shippers just like to add some spice.

Another Disclaimer: This section is only referring to FICTIONAL characters. I find the shipping of real people off-putting (regardless of gender) and it's not something I want to get into here.

The fact that many shows and movies fail "The Bechdel Test" makes it no surprise that, in many stories, the lovers have no love. While reading about different ships between (presumably) straight male characters, I assessed their fans points of view and pondered why they would see two straight male characters and think they would make a good romantic pairing. The common denominator seemed to be the connection between the characters. Frequently, it seems the love interest, girlfriend, or wife of a male protagonist is little more than background. We know nothing about her and in turn the protagonist seems to know nothing about her. He spends barely any time with her and she's often just a reference used for motivation. When they do spend time together the dialogue is minimal and the interaction superficial. Outside of her proximity to the protagonist, there is nothing to suggest they love each other.

However, their best friend? Their sidekick? Their frenemy? They know everything about them! They know their pain and struggles, they know their joy and peace, they are there for every important moment and are usually the ones to catch them when they fall or share in the triumph when they win. Not to mention the power dynamic again. They are seen (and see each other) as equals.

Now, if you want to write a fanfiction (erotic or not) and insert yourself into it, whose shoes would you rather be in? Even the antagonist or villain has more of a connection with the main character than their love interest. They know everything about them and spend more time and energy on them, even if it's trying to take them down.

In general, (fictional) women spend a lot of time on the back burner of a man's life. The things I am about to say are GROSS GENERALIZATIONS, but ones regularly perpetuated in the entertainment industry. These generalizations are that men and women can't be friends. Men see women as something to be pursued and won. Men don't talk to women about things important to them, they don't share in or care about their interests, and in the event they do, it's a means of winning her over. Once they succeed and the wedding ends, she becomes a possession to be safeguarded or, more likely, a nag and a burden. She's then seen as that man's weakness, the "old ball and chain", a responsibility and someone he is forced to spend time with. Constantly and consistently the drag, the nag, and the butt of the joke.

Who wants to be that? I'd rather be the Chip to Dale, the Spock to Kirk, the Sasuke to Naruto, or even the Joker to Batman. To be someone they want to be around, talk to, and be with for more than just sex and societal obligation. When shippers see that meaningful connection between characters, it makes sense to dream up a scenario where those two just end up together. All the ingredients for a love story are already there.

Or maybe they just wanna fantasize about two attractive characters doin' it and I'm over analyzing. Like I mention, this is speculation because I'm on the outside looking in on this one.

**Remember, the above is NOT a critique of real men or men in general. I love men and masculinity. This post is about media and fiction. Let us also remember that there are plenty of great hetero-romances that are the total opposite of the above generalizations. A couple of my favorite pairings include the 1960's portrayal of Morticia and Gomez from "The Addams Family" and Stan and Francine from "American Dad!" I love me some Francine!

Last but certainly not least! Why do straight women watch gay porn?

TL:DR: The male gaze ruining straight porn, insecurity, and liking men is something gay men and straight women have in common.

I have the most experience with this one. I used to collect gay adult films. So, why as a straight woman would I want to watch gay porn? It must be a fetish, right? I must have some weird obsession with gayness? Actually, it's not that deep and really simple once you spell it out.

Let's start with the obvious: Porn is made for men. They are the target audience and main consumers regardless of orientation. Straight porn is targeted towards straight men and focuses on the women while the man is in the background his looks a bygone afterthought.

Lesbian porn is also geared toward straight men and focuses on the woman...because it's all women! It is often an example of fetishization and hyper-sexualization of the queer community as well. However, women who are sexually attracted to other women also consume lesbian porn for obvious reasons.

Actually, I'd like to point something out. On some of the more popular adult sites, If you are looking for a woman doing "solo" activities you would find it in the straight category. It seems anything pertaining to women and sex is seen as "straight", including a lot of lesbian porn. However, if you look for a man doing "solo" activities you will mainly find that in the "gay" category. The assumption seems to be that if you are on the site you are a man, and if you're watching a heterosexual scene or any scene with a women, you're a straight man. However, if you're looking at a man with no woman in the scene, you must be a gay man. Women seem to be rarely considered. So as a woman, most of my time is spent in the gay section even If I'm not looking for homoerotic content and just want to see a good-looking naked man.

Moving on. Gay porn is made for gay men, so men are the focus of the scene. Do you know who else is sexually attracted to men? Straight women. Do you know who also doesn't want to watch porn where the focus is a woman? Straight women. Do you know who also thinks 2 penises are better than one? (Some) Straight woman. It makes 1 to 1 sense that some straight woman would like gay porn for a lot of the same reasons gay men do simply because we are both sexually attracted to men.

While collecting adult films, one of the series I really liked was called "Straight Style." It was produced by a gay label and the premise of the film was to see how the models interact and have sex with women. I enjoyed this series because it gave me a chance to watch heterosexual scenes, but because the target audience was gay men, the women weren't moaning obnoxiously loud which was (and is) a 100% turn-off for me. They just had regular sex and the male model was the focus rather than the camera being all up in the girl's cooch and boobs the whole time. I was also eventually able to find a label that made porn "for women" which again provided heterosexual porn that was focused on the man and the women acted realistically and not dramatically for the male gaze. The women were also "normal". Meaning they weren't hyper-sexualized with extensive work done. They just looked like everyday women. This was oddly comforting and brings me to last point, which can also serve as an answer to all three questions.

Insecurity.

During my self assessment this came up over and over again. I think that subconsciously my insecurities played a role in my enjoyment of homoerotic media. Humans constantly compare themselves to one another. It's natural. However, women (and especially young girls) have pressure placed on their looks and compare themselves to others much more frequently and sometimes to an unhealthy extent. There has been more than one occasion where I've daydreamed about a guy I like or a celebrity and then gotten sad because I know he doesn't like girls like me. I've watched straight porn and (aside from the antics of an overdramatic leading lady...and vaginas), been turned off because "that's obviously what men like, and that's not me." With gay romance, I'm not comparing myself to a anyone because there's nothing to compare. And, again, I can (sometimes) still get the dynamic of feminine and masculine energies in love without the power imbalance. Simply put, I can immerse myself in the story and enjoy it more because my insecurity is on the back burner.

I feel like this was true for a younger me. As I've matured and grown into an adult my insecurities have lessened considerably.

All in all the reason for this post is to offer some perspective and give a point of view that may not have been considered.

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I Love The Way He Blinks Without Blinking

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Gi-Hun

Gi-Hun...bro. This season of squid game was great. The social commentary is defiantly there! Gi-Hun is pissing me off. He's reckless, careless, and hypocritical without even realizing it because it's hidden behind the guise of heroism. I feel a long ass post and character analysis coming! He makes me sooo mad!

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All the T.O.P appreciation I'm seeing makes me happy!

It take me back to my kpop and K-Film fan days....the good parts anyway! lol

Say what you will about this man, but you cannot deny he's a great actor. Bro gives a 10/10 in every performance he's been in!

71: Into the Fire (2010)

A MUST SEE. If you ignore everything else on this list, this is the movie to see. 10/10 all around. This film is an amazing retelling of the true story of "71 undertrained and underarmed, outgunned student volunteer soldiers of South Korea during the Korean War." This is on the same level as Saving Private Ryan in terms of war movies. Seen it multiple times.

Tazza: The Hidden Cards (2014)

We got to see a topless T.O.P in this one! When will people learn that underground gambling is dangerous?

"After Ham Dae-gil enters the gambling world, he is set up as the fall guy in a crooked deal. To get revenge, he enters a final game which could be fatal to the loser."

19:Nineteen (2009)

You get both Sengri and T.O.P in this one. Fun fact, I didn't like him back then either. I remember when Hyunseung was a potential member and was bummed out that he got eliminated instead of seungri.

"The film follows three nineteen-year-olds, two boys and a girl, are accused of murder and forced to run away."

The Commitment (2013)

I remember being excited for this one because I was also a big fan of Kim Yoo-jung, although her role was pretty minor...minor in the way of acting not importance. T.O.P was 100% the focus and sometimes she felt like an after though. Like "oh yeh! I gotta save my sister!"

"The son of a North Korean spy follows in his father's footsteps to protect his younger sister."

Secret Message (2015 mini tv series)

(this was a giant ad for a translation app but ya know what? It was still good! lmao!

"Woo-Hyun is Korean man and Haruka is Japanese woman. They live different lives, but they both carry emotional scars from their first love. Woo-Hyun has yet to get over his first love, but he still wants to believe in true love. Haruka is a woman wants answers relating to love."

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The Second Season of Squid Game Was Good!

Color me surprised! I was honestly worried about how they would continue the story, but the 4 years they took to come out with a second season were not wasted. The social commentary on this one really got me thinking....

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WTF?!?! T.O.P?!! What ARE YOU DOING HERE!!!

I was sneaking and watching Squid Game 2 at work (cause its the day after Christmas and it's hella slow) and I almost yelled in the office! What a surprise!

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SOOOOOO Good!

sylvanian unholy family

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You ever mathed so wrong that you though a character was 12 when she had a baby?

TL:DR -All my stupid ass needed to do was 36-17. I don't know why I took such a long ass route to get the answer, that's where I tripped myself up.

Okay. In S3 E4, Yahya flashes back 36 years about his time with Legoshi's grandfather.

He meets Legoshi's grandmother and she get's pregnant about 6 months later.

SOOOOO, if Legoshi's mother were still alive today she would be 36. Which is fine. 36 minus 17 (Legoshi's age at the time of the flashback, he turns 18 a few episodes later) would put his mother at 18 when he was born.....

EXCEPT!!!!

In S3 E9 Legoshi tells Melon that his mother died when he was 12!

17-12=6. Meanning that, she died 6 years earlier. Here's the thing tho. If we conclude from the flashback that his mother is at most 36. So 36-6=30.....wait a minute...

I figured it out, LMAO! I confused myself! Before making this post I f***ed the math! I did 36-12 instead of 36-6.

36-12=24 and 24-12=12 so I was hella confused thinking Legoshi's mom was 12 when she had him and no one in the story seemed to think that was a problem, that's why i started this post!

What I meant to do is exactly what I said above, which is that she would be 36 today, making her 30 when she died 6 years ago, making her 18 when she had Legoshi, which is still young, but not call the authorities young. Sometimes you just gotta talk shit out.

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"Elisabeth" Side by Side:

I suggest watching full screen

Left: Yu Shirota as death and Ikusaburo Yamazaki as Lucheni

Right: Yoshio Inoue as death and Songha as Lucheni

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Re-reading your work and realizing there is no revision that can save it, you just gotta burn it to the ground and rebuild from the ashes.