innerfisheggvoid-blog

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I went to church for the first time in a long time. I'm not a believer of the Christian system but I try my best to respect it. I went in with a open mind and expected the person preaching to be talking about literally any story in the Bible or smth and just trying to explain it but they didn't. they started talking about false prophets and how people shouldn't follow them and they trick you for monetary gain and the preach false information or to comfort people or smth like thay... and I thought he was going good I guess until I heard the word feminist and lgbtq and we'll my ear perked up for pretty obvious reasons. I must admit that I wasn't paying as much attention before that as I was having a staring contest with a baby...Anyway the student minister who was talking mention or I guess referred to feminism and lgbtq as "theories "correct me if I articulate my words wrong but why is it so prominent for people to preach so much unnecessary hate and advocate for the downfall of people who just want to exist peacefully and equally....none of their livelihood should have anything to do with how close they are to God or even affect you in anyway..I'm so confuseddd

and the thing is I have to keep going to church not for spiritual reasons but for my gain because the church is a scam I don't wanna explain rn but yeah..

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I just have to say that people who squeeze the toothpaste tube from the top or the middle are kind of coocoos in they're noggin.

why make the end difficult when you can make it easier from the start by squeezing from the bottom up to get the most..I guess it'll end up in the same result anyway but why does one have to make it difficult when it's so clearly preventable...

I. can't stop you but I'll try to fix the mess you made

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Is it weird that often I, mean extremely often, fantasize about going back in time, or one of those kdramas where something traumatic happens to the main characters and the die but when they wake up they're like 5 or 10 years before they're death and the moment or time they're in is a very pivotal moment where it would change the out come of they're life. I often imagine myself going back and imagining how much better my life would be if I could go back with the knowledge I have now to change and be better have better experiences, just be a better individual. I know I shouldn't and focus on what I could do to change now and redirect from now but the future is unforeseeable.

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25 posts!

wowzer

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why do I yearn

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Falling Star

Prints

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Clocked

YELLOWJACKETS | Season 3, Episode 10, “Full Circle”

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💔

Rest in peace princesa 👩🏽‍🍳 we will all miss you

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Is it bad that whenever I can't sleep I drink cough syrup cus a side effect is drowsiness

I think it is

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I can't stop reading pedro pascal fan fiction

I have work to do but it's just himm omg him

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I don't trust people who have bad Instagram posts and what I mean by bad is that the post landscape snapchat pictures that have other people in it and it cuts off and zoomed in on people and it has a really harsh filter on it...sometimes it's cute but most of the time it makes me think that you're a creep I guess this is gender specific towards guys...but irdk

Or maybe it's because I've become a little bit more comfortable with posting regular pictures of myself ig and I've stopped using filters that edit my features the most I do is change the hue?! Idk what it's called but yk change it to rio de Janeiro?! Or the new York one..that's my fav

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Got worse

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Interview with the Vampire | What We Do in the Shadows

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I have nothing

I don't think I'm worth anything

I probably have chronic depression but it's wrong to self diagnose but idkk what else to call it

I feel like I'm the most depressed person ever that's and exaggeration.

When I try, I barely try but I attempt to tell people it's just taken differently and not exactly how I imagine they wild right before I tell them

I don't want to hear 'same' because then I feel like my depression isn’t something I should worry about because they seem to be functions just fine if they feel the same as me

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Sometimes I get so overwhelming o feel like my heart is going to stop working and explode

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The most "artistic" I could ever be rn

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I absolutely hate it when I tell a guy that I'm on birth control because it was prescribed to me and they proceed to say " I want you to get off birth control because it isn't good for you " and "it messes with your hormones "

OKAY first of all I am completely aware of allll the side effects of birth control as I am living through them! Also I need it to mess with my already messed up hormones to fix it because as i said beforee I'm taking them for that medical reason.

And I just know that ultimately their reason for saying that isn'tt because they want what is best for me and my health and stuff but it's so when we get together they have a chance of getting me pregnant or something or they feel like they have a sense of control over me like omg wtf ughhh why do I even put myself through situations w men who are obviously fucking assholes

And ik I'm just gna say I'm bored to my reason for everything (・_・)

P.S. I'm not trying to justify doctors prescribing birth control as their first and every solution to women's health and stuffff.＼(^^)／