itsdarkinsideher-blog

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

Writer’s Block

I need to write a poem - it is itching to come out of me. But I just can’t do it.

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

I miss you. You hurt me more than anyone has before, but I still miss you. And I hate myself for it.

It’s Dark Inside Her, May 20, 2018

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

When does  Surviving Turn to living? When does Living Turn to enjoying? When does Hell Turn to life? Does it?

It’s Dark Inside Her, May 20, 2018

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

Does anyone worry over me? I lose sleep over you,  Weep over you,  And wish the best for you. Does anyone extend the same courtesy? Or am I alone worrying tirelessly?

It’s Dark Inside Her, May 19th, 2018

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

I add, “Be you, everyone else is taken.”

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

Such a cute little story about a recovery moment. <3 Recovery is real, and I’m feeling it today!

Okay, the link isn’t working. Go to “The Mighty” and search for “ The Small Victory That Let Me Know I Was Recovering From My Eating Disorder “

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

Your body loves you. You are the only “you” your body has, so of course it loves you.

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

Intuitive eating is fun guys! Weird... but fun!

Said in a support group, May 17, 2018

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

Just one more time...

Friend: I know what my therapist said, but I'm going to restrict tonight and see where it lands me tomorrow.

Another friend: You'll just restrict again. Finish dinner, you can do it!

Tomorrow...

Friend: I know what my therapist said, but I'm going to restrict tonight and see where it lands me tomorrow.

Tomorrow...

Friend: I know what my therapist said, but I'm going to restrict...

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

Good things may come to those who wait. However, recovery asks you to chase her down.

It’s Dark Inside Her

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

And who wakes you up every day to remind you you are wanted as well.

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

I accomplished it all! Today I climbed a mountain. It was big and tall.  I got to the top,  screamed to the world, "Nothing will make me stop!" Then with a tired sigh, I put my head on my pillow, And sleep in the blink of an eye I'm glad I made my bed today

It’s Dark Inside Her, April 1, 2018

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

I forgot what hope looks like again I know I've seen it before. It shimmers and glows Hope makes a heart warm and excited And makes everything else hurt less It's so far away, I can no longer see it Was it white? Yellow? Gray? I don't know, was it even there? Everything hurts, and I'm shrinking smaller Eating disorder, anxiety, depression? No, I'll never get better. Never. I want a small spec, it's getting dark over here Just a bit, to lighten up that corner there There is a monster lurking – make it go away. But! I say – reminding myself why I should be hopeless I'm nothing. I'm sick. No one likes me How can anyone heal like this. Hope, I'm calling out to you. Hope, I need to see what you look like, Hope, I'm falling, and fast. Hope! Help?

It’s Dark Inside Her - January 31, 2017

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

No! Stop the chaos and darkness! I'm dying I taste the desire, the sweets I refuse to eat Can it be true? Can I be done? Maybe, we'll see. Maybe, we'll see I fight the mud, still too stuck to be free I fight the mud, am I making progress? I fight the mud, I whisper, can I have help? My weak, shaky hand sticks up through the mud, Oh please will you grab it? Help a damsel in distress? I dream, am I more than my illness? Yes I am, yes I am! Pull me up, I'm ready give my all Pull me up, I need a running start Pull me up, love my struggle, help hold me pain I feel it in my bones, my breath, my heart The desire is strong enough to make me weak I cry, dreaming of a better life, telling myself You can, you can, you can

It’s Dark Inside Her - January 16, 2017

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

Sun on the left,  Night on the right I'll sit in my darkness, Please enjoy the light. Your life is perfect, Mine an endless plight Tell me why you are better Tell me to stop the fight.

It’s Dark Inside Her - March 13, 2018

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

HA! You're cured? What a curious thought. You're better, it's over, no longer distraught. No more pain, no more worry It's all gone! Left in a hurry. Nothing can bring you down, you're a new man And I sit here, desperately making a plan No worries! No worries! It's okay There is life to live, no time to delay! HA! You're time will come, you mask will break. But until then, I'll know that being your friend was a big mistake.

It’s Dark Inside Her - March 13, 2018

[itsdarkinsideher-blog]

Sad nights Dark lights Delights? Never.

It's Dark Inside Her - March 7, 2018