jacqipro-blog

[jacqipro-blog]

Everybody knows me as the musician

I LOVE music. If I could do that the rest of my life and ONLY that, I would.

But my very first love was baseball.

Sometimes (more than that), I wonder what if.

I spent my youth playing with the boys and feeling no qualms over it.

I spent my youth dreaming of being the first female since the 1950’s to be an MLB star. I joined when I was 3, teeball. Loved it to the depths of my soul ever since.

I lost my opportunities in middle school. Big family changes lead to getting myself to and from practices and games and I couldn’t continue to do so. I still, deep down, feel a tiny tinge of resentment for that. I was a kid.

What if things had been different? Could I have been somebody? Not have to change paths after accepting what I thought was set in stone at only 12 years old?

With the right support that never would’ve fckn happened. But what do I know?

I just wonder…

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I’m back, tumblr.

Well I gave up social media a while back except Facebook for the “important stuff,” but I feel no desire to air my shit out there.

Im riding on the fact nobody gives a fuck about a 10+ year old account that hasn’t been used in over 5 years (consistently, more), but whatever

I feel like shit. I’ve worked my ass off. I’ve tried to build a career and future for myself and it’s all about to be thrown away because of a dumb mistake.

Time travel would be nice.

I’ve spent so long pursuing dreams that I created because I knew I couldn’t fulfill my passions in a way that I could survive on. Now to think those pseudo dreams could be ripped away? Fuck.

I feel worthless. No, unworthy. Absolutely unworthy.

I ache so bad.

[jacqipro-blog]

happy 420 and day i reserve a spot in hell

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Holy shit

I just dug out my old ass iPad and saw I had the (old ass) tumblr app from like 2013 & lately I've noticed tumblr is becoming a thing again kind of? So HI tumblr whoever the hell uses this anymore who follows??? Ummm...that's about it. Yeh

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Omg hi Tumblr, it’s been so long!!!

Time to catch up on my TL...

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I just need someone to tell me it's gonna be okay. I'm panicking so hard

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I crave physical affection. I crave skin on skin. play with my hair, hold my hand, touch me, kiss me. I crave you.

(via difficult)

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Some guys are just so boring. Like all they have to offer is dick, a few good morning texts, and a boring conversation. And people settle for it because they are desperate to have someone. But life should be exciting and relationships should be fun and spontaneous and bring out the creativity in both people. Well that’s what it has to be for me. That’s a must. Wanting to experience a life of enjoyment together is a form of intimacy

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I’m a Big Fan of watching people grow and become healthier and happier versions of themselves

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☝🏻️

i literally do not understand why anybody would cheat on their partner like if you really feel the need to be with somebody else in the same way as you currently are with your partner, be a decent human being and end your relationship to save the person you supposedly love a whole world of unnecessary pain rather than be a piece of shit and break their heart 

[jacqipro-blog]

do not lower your standards, you deserve good things.