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jetlagsuffication · 1 month ago

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traumas of the past

wc ; 482 words

content warnings ; description of sexual assault, panic attack, mentions of feeling sick

a/n ; first time posting something like this on here. i’m a huge tumblr lurker when it comes to fics and love what people on here come up with. murphy is a character with so much depth and his traumas didn’t get touched on enough in the show. so, i decided to write this little drabble.

february 19th 2155

murphy felt sick. it was possible that he'd been served a sketchy batch of algae soup that his stomach was now not agreeing with. perhaps it was some sort of messed up joke being pulled on him by the others.

the coolness of the metal wall that his back was pressed firmly up against wasn't helping. even with his t-shirt discarded and thrown across the room, he still felt as if his body was on fire. sweat embellished his pale torso as he rested himself further up against the wall. the moment his neck made contact with the metallic material behind him, his body tensed up and his chest tightened. breathing became more of a chore than a subconscious task and moving felt impossible. it was as if he was glued to the floor.

confusion overwhelmed him due to this new experience. he'd been through so much over the past six years but this left him feeling truly and utterly helpless. his body was shaking, tears trickled down his face and he felt as though there was something wrapped tightly around his neck. something cold, made of metal and attached to a large chain.

the memories hit him all at once.

the chains clanged loudly as ontari pulled him forcefully towards her. his footsteps echoed through the room as he reluctantly stumbled towards the bed. the sounds of her laughter was anything but contagious and made him feel sick to his stomach. bed creaks, breathy moans and brutal words.

goosebumps raised onto his skin as he felt her hands all over his body. each touch felt like someone was smearing filth all over his skin and leaving it to deeply embed itself inside of him. to stay there forever. to keep him unclean.

the scent of non-consensual sex swarmed into the room. a mix of sweat, fear and despair. it was an unpleasant smell and made murphy feel unsafe.

all he could taste as his lips met ontari's was guilt. he so desperately wished he could instead taste the warm affection that washed over his tastebuds whenever he kissed emori. murphy bit down harshly onto the insides of his cheeks, causing blood to fill his mouth with an iron-like taste.

ontari had such a predatory glint inside of her gaze as she stared down at murphy, who embodied her prey. he felt purely just like a piece of flesh for her to use for her own pleasure. when she'd noticed the distant look on his face, her facial expression turned from pleased to frustrated. how she couldn't understand why murphy wasn't enjoying himself was beyond comprehension. but the way she'd so easily dismissed how he'd turned down her advances showed the type of person she was. she didn't care one bit.

his senses overwhelmed him with traumas of the past. but for him, right now, they felt very present.

#john murphy #the 100 #richard harmon #murphy the 100 #drabble #zero drabbles 🎱#divider by purefantasia

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jetlagsuffication · 2 months ago

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