jimmypeeler

[jimmypeeler]

I know they're named after him but for reasons I can't fully articulate it's hilarious that the guy who invented zeppelins was named Ferdinand von Zeppelin

[jimmypeeler]

as a child being told "the moon controls the tides" with no additional explanation was like. oh okay. you want me to believe in magic? you're talking about magic right now? okay. fine

[jimmypeeler]

The friends that are chronically 30 minutes late are so important to have because they teach u patience and the meaning of loving someone so much u let ur anger go. I have not mastered either yet but I’m sure it’s coming

[jimmypeeler]

Special Agent Fox Mulder Tasting evidence since 1993

[jimmypeeler]

Ballet, like opera, is wonderful because it is monstrous, the hyper-development of skills nobody needs, a twisting of human bodies and souls into impossible positions, the purchase of light with blood.

Irina Dumitrescu, "Swan, Late: The unexpected joys of adult beginner ballet."

[jimmypeeler]

I just can’t believe some of u are soooo young u didn’t experience the early 2000s at all like even briefly . U were born and ur mother door dashed you home from the hospital

[jimmypeeler]

did i do it? did i do the meme right?

[jimmypeeler]

Had to ban the phrase “tricky dick” from my classroom during watergate lesson because saying the word dick in front of 30 fifteen year olds is like lighting a bomb and throwing it through the doorway but now they’re just calling him Richard the Treacherous like they’re all medieval peasants. gonna lose it

[jimmypeeler]

[jimmypeeler]

[jimmypeeler]

[jimmypeeler]

i love the conclave. what do you mean the entire world has tv cameras trained on the chimney of an old italian palace waiting for days or weeks until the color of the smoke changes and we find out who’s been elected as the next supreme dictator of catholicism

[jimmypeeler]

"empowering women by sending katy perry to space for 2 minutes" shut the fuck up. samantha cristoforetti was the first female commander of the international space station and she became an astronaut because of star trek. and there is a real chance she is a kirk/spock shipper

[jimmypeeler]

sisyphus doesn’t need everyone imagining him happy. imagine me. what about me?

[jimmypeeler]

"He would NOT fucking say that" does not apply to yoda, who could plausibly say anything

[jimmypeeler]

[jimmypeeler]

Winter has arrived on Poob.

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