jll4202

[jll4202]

It hits home!!! Be happy

a big part of being happy is being excited. be excited for everything - making a cup of tea, decorating your future apartment, seeing a friend again, falling in love unexpectedly, the next episode of a show you like, finishing something stressful, buying something you’ve been saving up for, a new album, sunsets, traveling, road trips, and the feeling of going to bed after a long day. think of something to be excited about and daydream about it often when you’re sad.

[jll4202]

[jll4202]

[jll4202]

I put forth effort but it goes in the wrong direction 90% of the time.........fml.....

[jll4202]

what the fuck am I doing with my life

[jll4202]

“Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final.”

— Rainer Maria Rilke

[jll4202]

[jll4202]

If only we could be together like this…..I miss talking to and seeing you….the last kiss was the worst…it ended to abruptly..you sent this to me and I can’t stop thinking about you. How bad I just want to text you. I doubt you’ll see this. Although I told you I had all these apps i can get away from people.😞😞😞😞💔💔💔💔💔💭💭💭💭💭💭💭 #ftf #hiddentreasureslipped #lostsoulslostlove

[jll4202]

So i had this amazing nightmare.....if that is possible...in a dark room only a glimpse of a street light through the blinds. I'm laying down cuddled up with her on top of my chest we conversate a few. It felt so surreal i felt her heartbeat...and her lips.......then she left without a trace....

[jll4202]

Way of life

[jll4202]

1 that got away...

I've cried, i wanted, i can never be taken back,the 1 for me is gone, to a lifestyle that can never come back, one who is trapped. 1 can never come back. Situations cant be deterred, i believe this is obscured. You cant even look at me without being taken back. My honest, true, first loved, never loved to the feeling again. I have not felt since. The locker has its presence. It keeps the feeling true to only me and you...

[jll4202]

So why is there such a feeling of lonely/uncomfortable and happiness all the same....or at least it feels like this only in public. So what is it that is uncomfortable about the situation?? Is it being happy alone or is just loneliness finally setting in and its going to be this way til i change what??? Or should i change?

[jll4202]

Uncles racecar from the 70s

[jll4202]

My ego sucks!!! Ive been referred to shia lebouf quite a few times tonight but why doesnt anyone want to socialize with me? Am i too much of a creep/loner???i hate the fact this is the only outlet where one wont get judged......

[jll4202]

Selfish and suicidal......no worries look forward to what tommorow brings right?

[jll4202]

Framework // The Story So Far

[jll4202]

If I never followed my feelings, none of my issues would have turned into problems. Since I only followed my feelings I can't unfeel anything. My problems become my demons and my tears. All i do is fear my next decision. Do I lift my body out of bed and attack or do I stay and dwell.