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Counterpoint: The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Anything But Real

 The Real Housewives of New Jersey is a reality show on the Bravo television network that follows five wealthy New Jersey women in the city of Newark, New Jersey. The show constantly shows the women fulfilling hegemonic prescriptions. The Real Housewives of New Jersey follows five different families that are all traditional, nuclear families. The show ignores the business success of the women and focuses solely on the women as homemakers and drama queens.

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Teresa Giudice has a husband and four daughters, Caroline Manzo has a husband and three children, Jacqueline Laurita has a husband and two children, Melissa Gorga has a husband and three children, and Kathy Wakile has a husband and two children. In, “The Real Housewives of New Jersey” viewers see the nuclear family as the norm. All of these nuclear families are white, wealthy, and play into gender roles. In the first season of the series there was a “housewife” who was a single mother of two, named Danielle Staub. The media and the producers of the show demonized her because of her single mother status. She was called a slew of names including slut, husband stealer, and prostitution whore. Danielle Staub lasted two seasons and then finally decided not to renew her contract. In my opinion, I don’t think anyone could blame her. Because she was a single mother, something that is extremely common in The United States today, the other ladies viewed friendship with her as a risk. Now that the pesky husband stealer is finally off the scene, the five remaining married women can breathe a little easier. Real Housewives follows the status quo of hegemony as Lull explains in Hegemony, “Hegemony requires that ideological assertions become self evident cultural assumptions. Its effectiveness depends on subordinated peoples accepting the dominant ideology as normal reality or common sense.” The ladies of The Real Housewives follow this status quo that Lull explains because it seems in their best interest to remain part of the group. Danielle Staub did not remain married and therefore did not follow the “covenant of marriage” that many hold sacred today. Staub suffered for this by being ostracized by the other women.

The Real Housewives are seldom, if ever, seen working. The main functions of these women is to bad talk one another and take care of their children. Teresa Giudice is the author of three New York Times Best Sellers, has her own line of Bellini, and also created her own a hair care line. Teresa is, without question, the breadwinner in her family but viewers do not see this. “ Women’s roles are defined as primarily in the home and men’s in the public world of work, the traditional family ideal also assumes a separation of work and family,”as Collin says in his essay, It’s All in the Family, the division of labor is clearly defined. Instead of championing Teresa’s business success and giving her daughters a positive female role model, we are shown her husband’s business failures and see her solely in matronly roles. The Real Housewives were given the opportunity to highlight a female’s success and instead ignored it with the exception of the other women bashing Teresa’s cookbooks.

The ladies drama often focuses on bad talking one another’s finances. For example, in the second season there were rumors that Teresa’s family had to declare bankruptcy and that their house was foreclosed. The women, Teresa’s alleged friends, did not rally around her and her family but instead spoke openly in interviews about her family’s financial ruin. “In this country, we believe that it is natural to want to “get ahead,” to want to own a better house and wear better clothes. The key word here is better, which refers not only to “better than I had before’ but also to “better than other people have.” (Tyson, Marxist Criticism) The other ladies scoffed at Teresa and saw it as leverage, a way for everyone else to know that they  could afford to keep their multi-million dollar mansions and that they all had more than Teresa. The Real Housewives, across the board, live their lives with the mentality of being “The Jones’s”. Each lady wants to have the most grandiose homes, cars, and go on the most lavish vacations simply to say they did. 

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Teen Pregnancy and Purity : Analysis Post

WIth 2012 being an election year there was a major focus on women and their 'purity'. Purity is something that is solely a focus for females in our culture. We expects girls to be sexual beings while still holding the virtues and cleanliness of a virgin. These virginal 'virtues' are being promoted with things like purity balls. Purity balls are extravagant events where daughters pledge their virginity to their fathers, and in return their fathers pledge to protect their daughters virginity. In class, we also watched an episode of 16 and Pregnant to further explore some of the ties between purity and teen pregnancy. In the episode two sisters get pregnant at roughly the same time and make extremely different decisions in regards to their pregnancies. One sister gets an abortion and the other decides to keep her child. The reason she gives for keeping the baby is that her and her boyfriend were together at the time and she did not think she was going to be doing it alone. She believed that she was entering a partnership in her parenthood venture. Before they started filming, the relationship had ended. The baby's father was absent in the entire episode except for a conversation had about the child's last name. When she goes into labor he goes to the hospital, just to leave to play basketball with friends. She puts her last name on the birth certificate and the baby's father is never seen or heard from again. As a culture, when we discuss purity and pregnancy we completely dismiss males. It has been so culturally engrained that females are caretakers, that even in our class discussion people disregarded the boyfriend's disappearance to attack a comment the mother had made. Instead of creating a huge emphasis on girls remaining 'pure' why don't we choose to educate young adults, boys and girls, on the very real consequences of having sex? There are statistics that show the high failure rate of abstinence based sex education programs, so why are we choosing to ignore them?

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Teen Pregnancy and Purity Mini Media : Stars with Purity Rings

In this article from 2010, the writer goes through several well known celebrities who have flaunted purity rings at a young age and are now constantly seen without them. The craziest claim I saw was the comparison of Selena Gomez and Britney Spears. Selena Gomez started wearing a purity ring when she was 12 years old (because she totally understood virginity, and it wasn't for the press or anything) and has recently been photographed with her then beau, Justin Beiber, without her ring. The writer than questions if Gomez's new lack of visual purity (with the ring) will cause her to enter the tumultuous path our poor Britney Spears took ripe with head shavings and psyche ward visits. To compare a (then) 16 year old Gomez who still maintains a pristine public image to the wreck that was Britney Spears is outrageous. Like the many links to virginity we made in class, it is saying if Gomez is having sex with her boyfriend, she is doomed to go off the edge. 

Is there any comparison at all?

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Relevant Reblog Post : Oprah

In my opinion, Oprah should have an entire college course dedicated to her. She has done so much selfless, good for others despite the challenging road she was given as a child. Oprah Winfrey Academy for Girls is a school funded by Oprah that given girls in Africa a conprehensive education so they are prepared for the next steps of their lives, be it continuing their education or begining a job. Oprah teaches a course called Life 101 to the graduating seniors of the school that highlights five lessons that are tied very closely to the ideas we covered in WGSS2230. Empowering young women so they have a greater self-worth and better confidence is one of the most vital things we can do as a community. "My primary goal is to leave each girl with a sense of self-worth and well-being that allows her to follow her instincts and trust her own wisdom."

 1. You are the master of your fate and captain of your soul."

2. You become what you believe, not what you wish for, and every choice makes it so.

3. When people show you who they are, believe them the first time. Character or lack thereof always shows itself early.

4. My creed based on the third law of motion in physics: What you put out comes back always, in all ways.

5. Trust your gut. It's your spiritual GPS.

As always, Oprah has said it best. 

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Relevant Reblog Post : A Surprising Decline

The Violence Against Women Act has two more weeks to be renewed and is currently in The House of Representatives. The Act was originally passed in 1994 with bipartisan support but supporters are now fearful Congress is going to ignore the act so it expires. The statistics for intimate partner violence has dropped dramatically, 64%, between 1993 and 2010. Advocates of The Violence Against Women Act accredit part of this decline to the Act. "These numbers prove that the Violence Against Women Act is working and effective," Gandy added, referring to a 1994 law enacted with bipartisan support that provides critical services for survivors of sexual assault and domestic violence." The war on women is not over in this country and if this act is renewed, it is a a step in the right direction for equal representation for males and females in The United States.

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Relevant Reblog Post : Women and ObamaCare

With the recent Affordable Care Act, often referred to as ObamaCare, many people are wondering what some of the benefits of this new policy are. This article clearly outlines eight of the health care services that will now be offered to women without any out of pocket fees. 

Well-woman visits.

Gestational diabetes screening that helps protect pregnant women from one of the most serious pregnancy-related diseases.

Domestic and interpersonal violence screening and counseling.

FDA-approved contraceptive methods, and contraceptive education and counseling.

Breastfeeding support, supplies, and counseling.

HPV DNA testing, for women 30 or older.

Sexually transmitted infections counseling for sexually-active women.

HIV screening and counseling for sexually-active women.

By the year 2014, these services will be available to forty seven million American Women without co-pays or fees. Many of these services are preventative and will help to keep women healthier in all stages of life. This list is great because it gets rid of all of the propaganda and clearly defines some of the benefits of the Affordable Care Act for women. 

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Relevant Reblog Post : The Strength of Egyptian Woman

I have to admit that I have been completely ignorant of how horrific the circumstances are for women in Egypt right now. In this article, I learned the jaw dropping statistic that 96% of married women have undergone genital mutilation surgery despite it being banned by the government in 2008. The battles that these women are facing make the fiscal cliff look like child's play. In 2011, female Egyptian protesters were lined up and given "virginity-tests" by officers! These women are fighting for stronger women's rights and they do not seem to be wavering. Kirollos, the women interviewed, does not dismiss the fear of the women protesters. " This kind of bravery, said Mariam Kirollos, an activist who was among the millions protesting in Tahrir Square last year, shows the revolution, for all the disappointment of recent months, is still being fought and holds promise for stronger women's rights." It is extremely empowering to hear that these women are standing up for a stronger democracy for themselves and their future daughters. 

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Pregnancy and Purity Q and A Post

What does the phrase “policing young women’s sexuality” mean?  How does this policing happen?

            The phrase “policing young women’s sexuality” means that it is our God given duty as parents (but mostly fathers) to shield our daughters purity and ensure that she remains a virgin until she is married. Or she will get an STD. Or die. Instead of encouraging young girls to ask questions openly about sex and educating them on the consequences of pre-marital sex, we have made discussing sex like opening Pandora’s box. The argument most conservatives have against discussing sexual activity with young people is that they believe it is encouraging them to have sex. One of the ways we see this policing in action is the surge of purity balls. Purity balls are usually extravagant events in which daughters as young as eight years of age pledge their virginity to their fathers until marriage. Their fathers are there to promise to protect their fragile little angel’s purity. The entire idea is comical in my opinion. To ignore science and deprive young adults of factual information regarding their bodies is selfish of their parents in my opinion. Utilizing scare tactics opposed to education is ignorance and to do it behind the shield of Christianity is even more disturbing. 

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relevant Reblog Post : The Gender Pay Gap and it's Relevance to Recent Graduates

I am very grateful to my parents for financing my undergraduate studies so I am not saddled with debt when I graduate, but I also understand that I am the exception not the rule in this matter. 85% of first-time undergraduates are receiving financial aid (2009-2010 figures, http://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/). Historically, 8% of a recent graduate's salary goes towards paying back student loans. In 2009, 47 percent of women were paying more than 8% of their salaries to student loans while only 39 percent of men were paying more than 8%. These numbers are significant because women, in their first year out of college, make 82 cents to every dollar earned by her male counterpart. People accredit this pay gap to different areas of study, like men graduating with degrees that have higher wages but a female and a male who graduate with an identical business degree still share wage discrepancies. Among business majors, women will make just over $38,000 while men will make just over $45,000. This is a big deal people! The degree I earn is going to cost me the same amount of money as my male counterpart, so why is he compensated at a higher rate than me? The Paycheck Fairness Act is an act that will make ensure this gender discrimination has to stop. I will admit that I am still very young and naive, but I do not understand how more people are not informed on this issue. As a father I would want my daughter to have the same financial opportunities as my son, and as a husband I would want my wife to be compensated equally to her male co-workers for doing the same job. 

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Relevant Reblog Post : The Weight Battle

This HuffingtonPost article reiterates what we heard in Jean Kilbourne's, Killing Us Softly 3. For women to move forward in the battle with image, we need to start rallying behind each other and support one another for the decisions we choose to make as business women, mothers, sisters, care-takers, role models or whatever else it may be. Cara Alwill Leyba's article focuses on the new battle on social media and the internet as a whole that has started to pit skinny women verse curvy women. I know everyone has seen the meme's with curvy girls next to a thin girl with captions like "curvy is better" or "thin is gross". Why are we choosing to tear down these thin women? Shouldn't we be encouraging healthy habits and applauding each other for obtaining a healthy life style? Simply because someone wears a larger size does not mean they are unhealthy as we discussed when we looked at the female Olympic Athlete's photos. Leyba sums it up nicely when she says that assumptions hurt all around. 

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Relevant Reblog Post : I Thought I had Heard it all...

Contessa Adams is a former stripper who is now a ministry leader who claims homosexuality is caused by sex with demons. If the first part if that sentence didn't catch your attention, the second part had to. This women claims to have been seduced by a demon temptress who tried to sway her to be a lesbian while she was a stripper. "Unless you're strong enough to rebuke it, they'll keep coming back. You must speak the Word of God, knowing you have power in the name of Jesus." She goes on to say that if a homosexual is paralyzed by fear they will be raped by Satan. If the fact that this former stripper is now a ministry leader (who speaks to children, might I add) didn't make your jaw hit the floor, I hope the sentiment that Satan raping gay people who "choose" not to find the light of God did. To use religion to push such a hateful, close-minded agenda is sickening. 

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Sex and the Supernatural Mini Media

Melissa Rosenberg, one of the screen writers for Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2, made the lovely comment that "only white people like this movie because they have too much time on their hands." A radio show then had African American women call in and say why they like Twilight. The entire sound bite is extremely crude, but for a screen writer on an extremely influential piece of cinema to make such an ignorant statement is unacceptable. This seems eerily reminiscent of the Disney PR blunder that ended up submarining Princess Bella (The irony of the princess's name is not lost on me).

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Sex and the Supernatural Analysis Post

In our class discussion on Twilight we talked extensively about the character Bella. Bella’s character and Kristen Stewart (in my humble opinion) probably only rival each other in being the least dynamic and interesting people on the face of the plant. Bella is so subservient to every man in her life it is uncomfortable to watch unfold on the screen. Her helplessness is sickening and completely unrealistic. She has so much self-pity and is so unmotivated to do anything for herself but somehow manages to get everything she wants out of life. An interesting point that was brought up during our discussion was that Bella is purposely a flat, bland character so people watching the film could project their own problems onto Bella and feel more connected to her as a character. I disagree with this notion because not a single person can relate to falling in love with a vampire and a werewolf. Audiences relate to the themes in the movie, like falling in love, or having feelings for more than one person at the same time. Twilight also romanticizes extreme behaviors like Edward stalking Bella. He watches her sleep, gets angry when other people think about her, is extremely protective of her, and even tells her he wants to kill her. After all of these unhealthy behaviors she falls DEEPER IN LOVE WITH HIM. In what world is that normal or healthy?! I will admit that I did not read the books, but from what I saw in the movies I was extremely disappointed and honestly disgusted. The messages that Twilight is sending to young girls are exceptionally inappropriate and unhealthy. 

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Q and A post : Sex and the Supernatural Twilight

How is race represented in Twilight?  In what was can these representations of race be seen as problematic?

         There are very many problematic representations of race throughout the Twilight Saga but the two that I find most unfortunate are that in the second part of Breaking Dawn the women from the rain forest are two African American women, and Jacob is not played by a Native American actor. In the final film they Cullen’s try to bring together their vampire friends from all over the world and when the audience is introduced to the women from the rain forest we meet two exotic looking African American women. One of the women does not speak at all and the other and minimal lines. Clearly this is problematic as we discussed earlier in the semester with women of color constantly being portrayed as animalistic. The women are supposed to be seen as exotic. They are in the movie to be visually appealing to the audience and they serve that purpose but at a great cost to African American actresses and females. Jacob not being played by a born Native American was problematic nationally not just in the realm of academia. Many people were very upset about this casting choice and for good reason. Native American actors are seldom casted into leading roles and it is also seldom that we see a Native American in a positive light in the media. Generally Native Americans are either being slaughtered by cowboys or smoking the ganja on a reserve while they rip people off at an Indian casino. This was an opportunity for the production of Twilight to be progressive and they missed the opportunity completely. 

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Mini Media : Claiming Sexuality 50 Shades of Grey

My two older sisters, my mom and I have an extremely close relationship where nothing is off limits for conversation. While I was home over Thanksgiving break my sister, mom and I were having a conversation about someone we all knew having very raunchy sex and being vocal about it. As my sister and I filled my mom you could see her skin crawling. She literally shook her body as if she had ants in her pants. "Why in the WORLD would anyone say those things out loud?! If you want to do that, that's fine but keep it to yourself!" Just hearing about sex made my mom physically uncomfortable. It was even more hilarious to me after the conversation we had in class about how 50 Shades of Grey has helped older women feel more comfortable about speaking openly about their sexual desires. In this interview with Katie Rolphe I think she does a wonderful job explaining why the reaction was so extreme to 50 Shades. We don't like things that make us uncomfortable so we often dismiss them, much like my mother did. It is great for women and men that we have this piece to help open up the dialogue for couples. 

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Relevant Reblog Post

Chris Brown has had to delete his Twitter account again because of a foul exchange he got into with comedic writer, Jenny Johnson. It started when he tweeted about looking old and she responded, "I know! Being a worthless piece of s*** can really age a person." Brown then proceeded to call her names and threatened to fart and poop on her while she gave him oral sex. She pointed out his grammatical errors as a last haha. It is so disheartening that as a public we have let Brown get away with so much and still worship him. His sign off tweet to Johnson before deleting his account was "Just ask Rihanna if she mad??????" He embodies so much of what is wrong with popular culture. 

What a winner...

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Fanboys, Fangirls, and Fandom Mini Media

I'm a little late to enter the game but I saw my first Twilight movie this past opening night for Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2. I can certainly say I am not a Twihard but I was amazed at the sense of community in the theatre. I was planked by my best friend and two older women. As I sat down they instantly asked me if I had read the books and when I said no they were eager to fill me in so I wasn't lost during the movie. I was tickled that these ladies cared so much they wanted to share their love of the story with me. As I looked around the theatre many groups were mingling like this. It was clear that the people talking to one another did not all come together. It was so refreshing to see people united even if it was for something as silly as a movie. The sense of community I felt in the theatre was the first time I had felt something like that outside of a sporting arena in a very long time. Fandoms are a great way for people of all different walks of life to connect and communicate with people the would otherwise never be exposed to.