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Bro. Bro. I just ran a show. A live show. It’s been a YEAR AND A HALF. I just ran the opening night show for the first season my theatre’s ever done.

I felt ready to be sick before the show started, and fuck was I out of practice. But the audience was happy, the performers were happy, and my higher ups were bragging about how I absolutely earned my pay tonight.

I feel better. This makes sense now, the theatre is real now, the season is HAPPENING NOW.

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Ehn glum’s just jealous.

Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy.

I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.

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The Black-Garbed Lighting Technician (Lumos technicus) is an elusive creature. It prefers to nest in a high, isolated location with a good view of its territory.

The most reliable way to make a sighting is to offer food - being sure to announce, audibly, that the food is intended for the Technician. The food need not be in the open - the Technician will find it. In fact, a secluded location might be conducive for a longer sighting.

Once the technician is alerted to the presence of food, it will promptly emerge. Ensure you are not in its path and do not interact with it, and you can observe as it silently fills its mouth, a plate, and its pockets with a variety of foodstuffs. Though Technicians are omnivores, many prefer a diet rich in meat.

Hunger sated, the Technician will retreat to its den.

If you leave food in place for several hours, you can often sight it returning to the source of its previous windfall after competing species have left the area for the night.

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Hey all!

The whole entertainment and theatre industry is shut down! (Sarcastic) yaaaaay! I’m not doing all that much.

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The feelings to have on a catwalk as a lighting person are:

Focus and/or frustrations at a light.

How lovely and peaceful! I wish I could perch up here more often.

Oh yeah, I'm still kinda afraid of heights! Oh well, nothing I can do about it.

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Me in the booth when I’m anxious to start the show but there’s nothing to do.

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So I’m still busy as all hell, and about to start another contract venue teching for Toronto Fringe Festival 2019. But here’s a call to techblr.

Like and reblog if you post:

-General theatre tech stuff

-LX especially

-Sound

-Costumes

-Bonus if you’re Canadian or Ontario tech

I’ll follow from my main, @mechanicalmelancholy

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Deep apologies for how inactive this blog has been. I’ve been a lot more busy with tech work than my online activity makes it seen. I’m currently in a contract venue teching for a dance recital at Randolph Theatre, then later this upcoming month I will be venue tech for Toronto Fringe Festival also at the Randolph.

So, updates are always slow, but they’re coming. I’m still alive!

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And here is a large reason why I no longer work in theatre.

Take care of yourself.

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Hey, don’t even worry about it- it’s not like we put OUR OWN FUCKING BLOOD SWEAT & TEARS into the lighting design or anything…

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theatre tech IS acting

acting like everything is fine

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I actually know how this feels. I worked as lighting op for Floyd Collins the Musical two years ago despite my severe fear of being trapped in closed spaces and underground, as well as Trap Door despite my gun trigger. I’d recommend familiarizing yourself with the technical elements, run over the tricks and artistic details in your mind to assure yourself that they are fake. I walked around my underground set a few times, then would walk outside to show myself I was not trapped. 

Also having warning for these triggers is wonderful, I got my SM to call the loudest off-stage gunshots over comm so I knew they were coming and controlled. If you can speak to your SM and have them call any shocking (no pun intented) details of the electro shock therapy and pig blood scenes that could help as well.

Advice on Working on a Show that involves Your triggers?

We just started working on Carrie the Musical here, I’m ASMing and I went into it knowing about the pig blood scene and the bullying, and even though the latter hits close to home I thought I’d be okay. Well now my director has changed the ending of it so now at the end there’s simulated electro-shock therapy (which was Sophomore in high school me’s biggest fear of what would happen if I didn’t find help for my mental health and still remains a GIANT trigger). I really want to work on this show and I don’t want to back out, does anyone have any tips?

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Actor: ahhhhhhh the haze machine is making a funny noise. What to do? RIP OUT ALL CABLES. Oh good the noise has stopped.

Board Op: Why have I suddenly lost two LED lights mid show?!?!

Post show problem solving:

SM and CM: Oh, theres nothing wrong with the lights, but all the DMX has been taken out the hazer?!?!

Passing Actor: Oh yeah, it was making a funny noise so I just ripped out the cables

SM and CM: WHHHHHHHHY

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Gothic Theatre

— You’re in the greenroom, listening to the play onstage. Your cue isn’t until Act II. You look at your phone to check the time. You look back up. Your cue is in three lines.

— “Never anger the costume designer,” they tell you, laughing. “You’ll be sorry.” You laugh along, until you’re called in for measurements. They pin cloth around your body, murmuring forgotten prayers and chants, claw-like nails digging into your skin. If you move at all, their eyes flash red.

— Working in tech, you always joke that you’re invisible to the actors. It’s not until the lead actress walks directly though you, that you begin to reconsider certain things.

— You love your director. You would die for them. You would kill for them. You would follow their every word without question. You love your director. You have died for them. You have killed for them. You follow their every word without question.

— The stage manager gets more stressed the closer it gets to the show. They begin to look more haggard, less human. On opening, they have horns and cloven feet.

— There’s a name and picture in the playbill you don’t recognize. No one has mentioned it. You’re afraid you’re the only one who sees it.

— Mid-play, you look out into the crowd of a faceless audience. For a second, they all become truly Faceless. You look away.

— Onstage, someone forgets a line. Backstage, time freezes. No one moves. Everyone is forced into stasis. You’re not allowed to breath. The line is remembered, and your lungs fill with air.

— During tech, a cue doesn’t work. Everyone holds while you try to fix it. It works. The scene continues. The cue doesn’t work. Everyone holds while you try to fix it. It works. The scene continues. The cue doesn’t work.

— The curtain opens and you walk out onstage, heart pumping. You blink, and it’s curtain call, with no memory of the play. Everyone tells you it was your best performance yet.

— Over the headset, the stage manager calls a cue. You play it. Over the headset, the stage manager yells at you for playing the cue when they didn’t call it.

— You’re new to theatre, and joking around with the cast. You mention the “M” play, and the silly superstition. Around you, faces pale. Then the stories come.

— In the dressing room, you grow comfortable changing in front of everyone. The others grow comfortable too. You start noticing things, scales and fur and claws out of the corner of your eye. You focus on doing your makeup, not wanting to be rude.

— If you’re alone in the theatre, stay where you are. Don’t fall for the easy tricks. Laughter in empty dressing rooms, singing from the tech booth, applause from the back of the house. Put your head down and study your lines. You’ll make it out this time.