llxre

[llxre]

“I love you, but I don't know how to.”

- 春haru (pls. tolerate me)

[llxre]

Muli akong nanaganip kagabi

Sa tagal ng panahon ng tagtuyot

Biglang natuliro sa isang tingin mo lang

Walang masabi sa iyong tabi...

Nahihilo na sa pag-ikot ng mundo,

Hindi na makapikit sa kama ko

Ngunit nang iyong ipinadinig ang tinig mo

Sa wakas ay natikmang muli ang paghimbing

[llxre]

The Year

Thank you for my first tears of the year.

You've made something clear for me by being unclear,

By not being near...

No — by perhaps inching away.

But I'd let you do it again.

Give me a reason to pick up this pen.

I don't expect you to heal my heart,

I've known love breaks it from the start.

My sweet evergeen, stay what you are

And you don't have to stay by my side

But then, I would miss you all my life;

For my hurt is not your part.

Intimacy is the warmest form of life.

Please let me know you bare in strife,

In contentment, and in everything contrived,

In everything imagined, in between it all.

Walk into the knowing ken of my understanding

Even if I should never be one to walk in yours,

Though you said I already am in passing —

Then you'd know you consume my every waking hour.

If you'd listened closely, you would hear

How much I simply wanted you near.

What my overflowing heart needed then was clear,

So thank you for the first tears of the year.

[llxre]

Land Reclaim

A forgotten billboard in the farside roads

down the desolate fields

in this old countryside.

I'm so naked,

and I feel the winds blowing cold

at the rust of my feet.

The vines climbing to gobble me up,

to bring me back down to the ground

I was made from.

They sleep through the ride,

the driver's eyes glued to the fading pavement

in this desolate far countryside.

A glance is the most I'd get,

and I feel the winds blowing cold

at the rust of my bones.

The fields growing cleanly around me,

there's nothing new up or down here.

I'm so naked.

Some fading ink tattoos on the old billboard,

I have nothing to show for,

why am I even here?

[llxre]

A Reaching For

The earth in my bones cry out, a calling to come home

My shaking hands to the sky, in desperation undone

The past in my mind, the kneelers I'd known

Everything that's led me to be almost alone

I watch the sky burn every day

And I let its heat melt my sacred skin

And in colder nights, I go astray

From the warmth of a glowing screen

I felt the future pass me by

From the green fields to the city lights

Not a thing has cast the die

To move me forward

The same circle

Of high and low

Inescapable

Cry

[llxre]

the sun has tried to outshine you,

and each time, did it give its best;

but it has only ever fallen short —

it has no choice but to accept

so it withdrew behind its curtain clouds,

allowed the lightning rods to light up the sky

in place of its crown of sunbeams

and it slumbered for the first time

it found relief knowing its beloved earth is fine

for the first of all time

without its needing to warmly shine

because it has you, now, to blanket the world

with your own, indomitable light