madozzy

[madozzy]

Beacon Cafeteria - One Week Later

The cafeteria was lively as usual, with students eating and chatting. Jaune and Yang were seated together, casually discussing their next mission. Blake, as always, sat nearby, nibbling on a sandwich and trying to ignore the antics of her blondes.

Yang leaned back in her chair, smirking. "I still think Cardin got off easy. Three weeks in a coffin? That’s not nearly enough for what he said to Blake."

Jaune, who was halfway through a bite of his sandwich, paused. He swallowed, then leaned in conspiratorially. "Oh, don’t worry, babe. I’ve got this."

Before Yang or Blake could question him, the cafeteria doors exploded inward with a deafening BOOM. Smoke and debris filled the room as students ducked under tables, screaming in surprise. When the dust cleared, Winter Schnee strode in with the Ace Ops right behind her, all in full combat gear. Their expressions were grim as they scanned the room.

"Cardin Winchester!" Winter barked, her voice like ice. "Do not move!"

The Ace Ops spread out, surrounding a now pale and trembling Cardin. He stammered, "W-what’s going on?! I didn’t—"

"Hands in the air, scumbag!" Elm growled, raising her massive hammer.

"We know what you did," Winter snapped coldly, her piercing gaze locked on him.

"I-I don’t even—" Cardin tried to protest, only to be cut off as Winter raised a hand.

"Gag him," she ordered curtly.

Marrow stepped forward, quickly clamping a gag over Cardin’s mouth. The terrified boy’s muffled protests went unheard as the Ace Ops roughly grabbed him and hauled him to his feet.

Blake, sitting calmly at the table, blinked in surprise. "What just happened?"

Jaune leaned back with a smug grin. "Let’s just say Cardin won’t be bothering anyone anymore."

Yang chuckled, watching as Cardin was dragged out of the cafeteria. "Remind me to never get on your bad side, babe."

Jaune gave her a playful wink. "Noted."

[madozzy]

Beacon Cafeteria - Lunchtime

The cafeteria hummed with its usual lunchtime energy. Team RWBY and Team JNPR were seated at their usual table, chatting and eating. Suddenly, the cafeteria doors creaked open, and everyone turned to see a disheveled figure stumble inside.

It was Cardin Winchester.

Covered in mud, his clothes torn and his face streaked with dirt, he limped toward the table. The room fell silent, all eyes on him as he staggered forward and dropped to his knees in front of Blake.

"Belladonna," he croaked, his voice trembling. "I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry for what I said. Please forgive me! I'll never—never say anything like that again!"

Blake raised an eyebrow, her ears twitching slightly in curiosity. She glanced at Jaune and Yang, who both sat frozen, their faces unreadable.

Yang leaned back in her chair, a smug grin spreading across her face. "Cardin, you're alive?" she asked, mock surprise dripping from her voice.

Jaune crossed his arms, frowning. "Wait a second. How is that possible? It's been three weeks.

At Jaune's words, Cardin's eyes darted toward him and Yang. The moment he saw their faces, a blood-curdling scream escaped his lips. Without another word, he scrambled to his feet and bolted out of the cafeteria, leaving a trail of mud and confusion in his wake.

Blake slowly turned to her boyfriend and girlfriend, her expression skeptical. "Three weeks, huh? You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that, would you?"

Yang chuckled nervously, scratching the back of her head. "Uh, nope. Not a clue."

"Not a thing," Jaune added, looking away as if suddenly interested in his sandwich.

Blake sighed, clearly unconvinced, but decided it wasn’t worth pressing—yet. Instead, she picked up her tea and muttered, "I don’t even want to know."

[madozzy]

Beacon Cafeteria - 24 Hours Ago

Cardin Winchester leaned casually against the wall, a smug grin on his face. "Hey, Belladonna," he sneered, loud enough for the whole table to hear. "Shouldn't you be eating out of a bowl on the floor with the rest of your kind?"

The cafeteria fell silent, the tension thick as Blake’s golden eyes narrowed. Before anyone could react, Cardin barked out a laugh and walked off, clearly proud of himself.

---

Beacon Courtyard - Present Day

Blake leaned back in her chair, sipping her tea with a casual calm. "So... Cardin's been missing since yesterday," she said, her tone light but her gaze sharp as it flicked between Jaune and Yang. "You two wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you?"

Jaune and Yang, sitting side by side, exchanged a glance. Yang scratched the back of her head nervously. "Uh, nope. Not a clue," she said, forcing an innocent grin.

"Not a thing," Jaune added quickly, nodding far too eagerly.

Blake’s eyes narrowed suspiciously, but she let it slide. For now.

---

12 Hours Ago

Cardin Winchester, stripped of his usual bravado, was sobbing uncontrollably as he dug a hole in the middle of the forest. His hands were blistered, dirt smeared across his face, and his aura flickered weakly from exhaustion.

"Please!" he begged, his voice cracking. "I’ll apologize! I’ll do whatever you want! Just—just let me go!"

Yang, leaning casually against a tree with her arms crossed, smirked down at him. "We don’t want you to apologize, Cardin."

Cardin froze, his shovel trembling in his hands. "W-what do you want?"

Jaune, sitting on a nearby log with a calm yet menacing demeanor, gestured to the dirt. "We want you to dig."

Cardin broke into fresh sobs, throwing his whole weight into the task as Yang and Jaune watched in silence, their expressions eerily calm.

---

Back to the Present

Blake raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced, but Jaune and Yang remained steadfast, their expressions the picture of innocence.

"Nope," Jaune said again, his tone firm.

"Not a clue," Yang repeated, popping a grape into her mouth.

[madozzy]

Scene: Beacon Cafeteria

Cardin is pulling Velvet's ear, and the Faunus girl is clearly distressed. Yang starts to rise from her seat, anger flashing in her eyes, but pauses when she notices Jaune casually walking toward Cardin with a baseball bat resting on his shoulder.

Yang: "Uh... never mind. This is gonna be good."

Jaune stops a few steps away from Cardin, taking a couple of practice swings with the bat. The sound of the swings cutting through the air catches everyone’s attention, and the cafeteria goes quiet.

Jaune: (calmly) "Cardin."

Cardin turns around, sneering. "What do you wa

CRACK! The bat connects squarely with Cardin's nose, sending him sprawling to the floor, unconscious.

Jaune drops the bat, glances at Velvet, and gives her a respectful nod before walking back to his team's table sits, and casually picks up his lunch like nothing happened.

The cafeteria is dead silent. Everyone stares at Jaune in shock.

Blake snorts, trying to suppress her laughter, but it quickly becomes a giggle. Yang, Ruby, and Nora follow suit until the entire table is laughing. The laughter spreads throughout the cafeteria until even Velvet, still rubbing her ear, is chuckling.

Glynda storms into the cafeteria, her heels clicking loudly against the floor.

Glynda: "What is the meaning of this? Who assaulted Cardin?"

The cafeteria falls silent again, but nobody says a word. Everyone avoids Glynda's sharp gaze, refusing to snitch.

Jaune takes a bite of his sandwich, casually looking at Glynda. He doesn’t say a word, but the faintest smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth.

Glynda narrows her eyes, clearly suspicious, but with no witnesses willing to speak up, she sighs in frustration.

Glynda: "Fine. Cardin, get yourself to the infirmary. And the rest of you—back to your meals!"

As Glynda leaves, Jaune leans back in his chair,

The table erupts in laughter again as Cardin is dragged out of the cafeteria by his team. Velvet, now smiling, approaches Jaune's table.

Velvet: "Thank you, Jaune."

Jaune: (nodding) "Anytime."

Ruby leans toward Yang, whispering.

Ruby: "I think Jaune might be my new favorite person."

Yang: "I think he's everyone's favorite person right now."

---

From that day forward, the students at Beacon knew two things: don't mess with Jaune, and don't mess with Velvet

[madozzy]

An unusual smell in the cafeteria

The group is sitting in the cafeteria when Ruby suddenly wrinkles her nose, sniffing the air with a look of disgust.

Ruby: (sniffing) What’s that smell?

Ren: (calmly observing) It appears Cardin’s body still hasn’t been moved.

Blake: (frowning) It’s been three weeks.

They all exchange uneasy glances, looking over to where Cardin’s body still lies untouched.

Weiss: (exasperated) Has no one thought to clean this up?

Jaune: (shrugging nonchalantly) Guess they’re still looking for the “culprit.” You know, the investigation’s ongoing…

Yang: (trying not to laugh) Guess we’re gonna need another vacation just to get away from the smell!

Ruby groans, facepalming as the rest of the group chuckles at the darkly absurd situation.

[madozzy]

Ozpin Addresses the Incident

Ozpin stands before a small gathering of students, clearing his throat solemnly.

Ozpin: Now, if we could all observe a moment of silence for Cardin… (waits half a second) Okay, that’s enough.

The students exchange puzzled glances.

Ozpin: (with a reassuring smile) Do not worry, everyone. We have our very best investigator on the case. Jaune Arc himself has generously volunteered to find the one responsible.

Jaune, standing nearby, nods with a serious expression.

Jaune: (deadpan) Rest assured, I’ll leave no stone unturned until I find the culprit.

Ruby snorts, barely holding back a laugh, while Yang rolls her eyes.

Yang: (whispering) This has got to be the most ridiculous investigation ever.

Weiss: (sighing) I can’t believe he’s actually going along with this…

(2 months later)

Ozpin approaches Jaune, arms crossed with a slight smirk.

Ozpin: And how is the investigation going, Mr. Arc?

Jaune: (putting on his best serious face) Still working on it, sir. But… I’m going to need a blank credit card and a vacation for two to a spa resort. You know, for investigative purposes.

Ozpin raises an eyebrow but hands Jaune a blank credit card, clearly amused.

(10 minutes later…)

Jaune finds Yang in the hallway, looking excited.

Jaune: Hey, Yang, want to go to a spa resort with me? You know… for the investigation.

Yang: (grinning) Well, if it’s for the greater good, how could I say no?

They both chuckle as they head off, leaving their friends shaking their heads at the absurdity.

[madozzy]

The Confrontation with Cardin

Cardin storms into the room, face red with anger.

Cardin: ARC!!!!

Jaune: (nonchalantly) Oh, hey, it's been a while.

Cardin: (growling) Turn around and face me, Arc!

Jaune: (shrugging) Alright, if you insist.

Jaune casually turns around, raising a gun and firing three shots. Bang! Bang! Bang! Cardin drops to the ground, and Jaune turns back to see his friends staring at him in shock.

Jaune: (holding up his hands) It’s okay. They’re just blanks!

Ruby: (nervously) Well… see, you say that…

Jaune: (frowning) But… they were blanks. Weren’t they?

Ren: (peering over at Cardin’s motionless form) Uh… only if the back of his skull picked that exact moment to explode outwards.

Silence fills the room as everyone processes what just happened. Then, Jaune nervously laughs.

Jaune: (sheepishly) …Oops?

[madozzy]

The Friends Walk In

Ruby and Blake enter the room, only to find Jaune and Yang laughing, telling puns, and... making out between jokes.

Ruby: (groans) Oh no, now there’s two of them!

Blake: (sighs, shaking her head) I don’t think the world can handle this.

Jaune and Yang pause, looking up at their friends with matching mischievous grins.

Jaune: (grinning) Hey, we’re just pun-derful together!

Yang: (winking) Yeah, we’re just keeping things pun-der control!

Ruby and Blake: (facepalming in unison) Oh, dear Dust, save us…

[madozzy]

Combat Class - The Finale Match

Cardin steps into the ring, scanning the area with suspicion.

Cardin: (muttering) Alright, Arc, where are you hiding? I know you’re up to some— pauses …Is that a tank?

Out of nowhere, a tank rolls into view, its barrel lifting slowly before aiming directly at him.

Cardin: (eyes widening) Oh… crap.

With a deafening BOOM, the tank fires. When the smoke clears, a massive crater is left where Cardin once stood.

Glynda: (massaging her temples) …Winner, Jaune Arc.

Yang is on the ground, clutching her stomach in hysterics.

Yang: (gasping for air) Jaune… I can’t… this is too much!

Weiss: (staring in shock) Did… did Cardin just die?

Ruby: (eyes sparkling) Huh… I wonder if Jaune will let me use the tank!

[madozzy]

Combat Class - Yet Another Day

Cardin steps into the ring, looking even more prepared with both goggles and earmuffs. He stands tall, holding his mace confidently.

Cardin: (smirking) Alright, Arc, your tricks won’t work this time. I’m ready for anything!

Jaune: (holding up a detonator, grinning) You sure about that? You might want to take a closer look at your mace.

Cardin, confused, glances down and sees a brick of C4 attached to his mace.

Cardin: (horrified) Wait… how did you…?!

Jaune presses the detonator, and a controlled explosion sends Cardin flying out of the ring.

Glynda: (sighs deeply, rubbing her temples) …Winner, Jaune Arc. (muttering) I need a drink.

Yang is on the floor, laughing so hard she can barely catch her breath.

Yang: (gasping between laughs) Jaune… you’re a legend!

[madozzy]

Combat Class - The Next Day

Cardin steps into the ring, confidently sporting a pair of large goggles.

Cardin: (smirking) Your pocket sand trick won’t work this time, Arc! I came prepared.

Jaune: (grinning) Oh, I figured you would. That’s why I brought this!

Jaune pulls out a flashbang and tosses it right in front of Cardin.

Flashbang: BANG! 💥

Cardin: (stumbling, disoriented) AHHHH! I can’t see!

With a swift shove, Jaune sends Cardin out of the ring again.

Glynda: (pinching the bridge of her nose) …Winner, Jaune Arc.

Yang is absolutely losing it, clutching her sides with laughter.

Yang: (wiping tears from her eyes) Jaune! You’re killing me!

[madozzy]

Combat Class Scene

Cardin smirks confidently as he approaches Jaune in the combat ring

Cardin: Well, well, well, Arc. Looks like another loss for you.

Jaune: (grins) Nah, I've got a secret weapon this time.

Cardin: (scoffs) Secret weapon? What, a new trick to trip over yourself?

Jaune: (reaches into his pocket) Oh, it’s better than that… POCKET SAND!

Jaune flings sand from his pocket straight into Cardin’s eyes.

Cardin: (stumbling and rubbing his eyes) AHHH, my eyes! That’s cheating!

Jaune shoves the blinded Cardin out of the ring, who lands with a thud outside the boundaries.

Glynda: (utterly baffled) …Winner, Jaune Arc.

Yang bursts into laughter, nearly doubling over.

Yang: (wiping a tear) Oh man, Jaune! Pocket sand! Classic move!

[madozzy]

Which fallout is your favourite?

[madozzy]

The administratum is honestly pretty incompetent