malarkeyenthusiast

[malarkeyenthusiast]

[malarkeyenthusiast]

I fully understand that it's more useful this way because most people have no intuition for the mass or volume of aerosols, but it's still funny as hell that the nutritional information of non-stick cooking spray is listed in terms of calories per second.

[malarkeyenthusiast]

reblog if ur mom is smart and beautiful

[malarkeyenthusiast]

The Lord is unnecessarily gracious to idiots like me.

[malarkeyenthusiast]

[malarkeyenthusiast]

let's 😐 with mama

[malarkeyenthusiast]

some people are afraid to be cheesy. I live my whole life on the charcuterie board

[malarkeyenthusiast]

Waittttttt just remembered that when stuck in a situation where I'm severely struggling I can offer that up to God and commit to it for Him lmaoooo I'm normal again now btw

[malarkeyenthusiast]

Ocean announcement:

little known fact but this idiot is harmless

[malarkeyenthusiast]

i have this awesome skincare routine called picking at my face till it bleeds. its great because it makes my skin way worse in every way and also it hurts

[malarkeyenthusiast]

A customer asked for pickles on their sub and I (dumbass) reached for the cucumbers. They quickly went “oh, no, I want pickles!” and I immediately said “they could’ve been pickles. in another life” ????? Why did I get hired????????

[malarkeyenthusiast]

the bear just flumpf

I felt like you guys will appreciate this

[malarkeyenthusiast]

\ (ツ) /

[malarkeyenthusiast]

"boys will be boys" "that's just guy talk" "you know how men are" actually Titus 2 calls upon older men to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness and younger men to be self-controlled, so jot that down

[malarkeyenthusiast]

We need to cancel my father, when I told him I'm really digging the Swedish recording of Phantom, he started singing Music of the Night like Swedish Chef.

[malarkeyenthusiast]

Higher ups have banned me from drawing