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I have the most debilitating anxiety rn. Always... I'm spinning, but not spun..
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Noone will ever know this pain. This gut wrenching. This heartache. Tears welling. Throat in a lump. Have cried so much, tears no longer fall. I can't believe it's over, but we're free after all. I'm glad I met you. Yet still sad you left me. Dazed confused "wtf just happened?" I said Where did I go wrong. I could blame, use, excuse, dismiss all other possibilities. The truth. You inhibriated me. W your lies , false promises, & deciept. Burried me alive. I STILL CAN'T BREATHE. In so much pain.....I can't see.
I miss you, the idea of you I guess that blinding me, binded me. You lied to me.
I'm leaving now not looking bk. I don't know her, I don't know her that's that. Please give me strength oh Lord. For I have fallen, I barely see the light oh Lord. I NEVER saw him coming. Take Care of him FATHER. My heart wrenching harder. I wanna cry oh Lord. I wanna say goodbye. I TRUST that you're silence is for my protection. Can't lie wish it had gone another direction. I miss his face, his smile. How he looked at me once.
I can't take this, I just want to love him, see him, hold him. Ask him why.
I don't wanna move on....馃様
I miss you Babe, take care my love.
Im.so.hurt & broken. Words left unspoken
#staysafestaystrong
#2317gone
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I never feel safe anymore. Why did you do this to me?
Why did I allow it?馃ズ
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I have this overwhelming feeling of sadness. I feel alone & empty. Still broken. I wish it would just go go away. All of it.
#metheyez
#lovehurtmeagain
#HATEME
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Gunna smoke some marijuana, see if it helps. My life is full of shit. Vices ,vices galore..
Study Me . I want more.
#metheyez
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I CAN'T get anything done. All I wanna do is get high. I'm running in circles forgetting everything. I clean the restroom, kitchen the house period it takes me a longer time & I take alot more steps due to this. Bk & forth bk & forth. Exhausting I'm exhausted just typing it man. I hate this shit. I really do. It has consumed me. I know alot of y'all on here are NOT to this point. And quite frankly NEITHER AM I. That's the problem.
#metheyez
#funtioningaddict
#paranoid
#broken
#lost#empty
#willbutnostrength
#lies#tired
#alone
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路
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