methodical-malpractice

[methodical-malpractice]

Mulder: What's the ONE thing I asked you NOT to do tonight?

Ellis: Raise the dead.

Mulder: And what did you do?

Ellis: Raise the dead....

[methodical-malpractice]

Ellis: FIGHT ME, YOU NERD ASS SLUT!

Shane: At least try to sound slightly more sophisticated when you threaten someone.

Ellis: Oh I'm sorry. I should ask; Dost thou wish to engage in a duel, my good bitch?

Shane: Somehow that's worse.

[methodical-malpractice]

Shane: What's the scariest horror movie you've ever watched?

Lomasi: Annabelle.

Harli: Paranormal Activity.

Ellis: High School Musical. All throughout high school I've been scared that everyone was gonna randomly get up and start singing and dancing and I'd be the only one who doesn't know the words.

[methodical-malpractice]

Harli: What's wrong? You look 10 seconds away from ripping someone's throat out.

Shane: Fucking Lomasi and Ellis were trying to invoke one of the minor Gods again last night. I didn't get an ounce of sleep, thanks to their bloody chanting.

[methodical-malpractice]

Shane: Could you guys at least try to see this from my perspective?

Harli: *Crouches down*

Lomasi: *Kneels down*

Ellis: *Sits on the floor*

Shane:

Shane: I hate all of you.

[methodical-malpractice]

Harli: You're smiling. What happened?

Lomasi: What? Can't I just smile because I feel like it?

Ellis: Shane tripped and fell down the stairs today.

[methodical-malpractice]

Ellis: Can we stay at your house tonight?

Shane: Why?

Harli: Ellis fiddled with an Ouija board and cursed hers.

Ellis: My dad doesn't know how to properly banish spirits, so we've just been throwing salt at them and yelling 'DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A HOTEL TO YOU?!'

[methodical-malpractice]

Lomasi: I could fix them but honestly whatever the hell is wrong with them is way funnier.

Ellis: That's probably what any God thinks about me.

[methodical-malpractice]

Harli: We're playing Scrabble. It's a nightmare.

Shane: Scrabble? Scrabble's great!

Harli: Not when you're playing with Ellis, it's not. She puts down words like 'ephemeral' and I put 'dog'.

[methodical-malpractice]

Ellis: Did none of you hear what I just said??

Harli: I've been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.

Lomasi: I got distracted about halfway through.

Shane: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

[methodical-malpractice]

Shane: You often use humor to deflect trauma.

Ellis: Thank you :)

Shane: I didn't say that was a good thing.

Ellis: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny.

[methodical-malpractice]

Harli picrew dump ♡

[methodical-malpractice]

Lomasi picrew dump *__*

[methodical-malpractice]

Shane picrew dump :)

[methodical-malpractice]

Ellis Picrew dump<3

[methodical-malpractice]

Harli: Wait, if baby oil dissolves condoms, what does it do to babies??!!

Shane: Believe it or not, babies and condoms are made from different materials.

Lomasi: It's like rock paper scissors. Baby oil defeats condom, baby defeats baby oil, condom defeats baby.

Ellis: Rock also defeats baby.

[methodical-malpractice]

Harli: What do you want then?

Lomasi: er....something work related?

Harli: What department is this?

Lomasi: Sorry?

Harli: Well, if it's work related you'd obviously know what department this is. What department is this?

Lomasi: *Looks at Ellis and Shane* Uhhh, some sort of...homosexual department?