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LOST #3

I need to fucking vent or scream into the void

been awhile hot fucking minute since I wrote here but anyone else increasingly frustrated with american mental health care in this country ?..... that seems like a good enough excuse to write a random blog post!

This is my probably never going to be seen but here goes nothing..

Long Story short - I've been seeing a therapist for a while, and something she said recently stood out — that I may be showing signs of ADHD, Autism Spectrum Disorder (or Asperger’s), or possibly OCD.

I'm not claiming to have any specific diagnosis, but I am interested in exploring whether I might be on the autism spectrum — and possibly ADHD as well. That said, I’m feeling pretty overwhelmed and unsure of where to even start or how to find the right professional to talk to about it.

During our sessions, my therapist stated that some of the behaviors or things I do in daily life might fall in line with either being autistic or having Asperbergers. ( this is a spectrum i know just cuz i might have similar symptoms doesn't mesn i have it ) I have asked my therapist if she can just evaluate me herself on that, and she explained that she doesn't have the ability to diagnose me like that. All she does is manage or talk about symptoms.

Not to mention that my therapist explains that it's difficult to find a diagnosis on autism in adults because the DSM 5 only accounts for autism in kids.

In sessions, I would keep bringing up on finding an evaluation because I either i feel like I need more answers or I feel like she's not listening. To her credit, she did point me to some resources, but most of them, so far, have hit a dead end , except for a couple to have yet to look at still. I guess I just feel like Im not making much progress. I think most of what's getting to me is how my therapist has mentioned how a diagnosis wouldn't make a difference for me and that I would still be progressing the same way in life and in our sessions. Or that what would the point or purpose of getting a diagnosis? ( which makes me more infuriated honestly because it would be like Idk EXTREMELY helpful to understand the framework of who i am ?!?! Likewhatdoyoumean ?!?! ? )

And if its all hearsay and not really an official diagnosis then how can I really claim to have these disorders? And how can I really understand how to cope when I am having a idk a breakdown if the normal way isn't working?

And in the same breath (my therapist) will also describe how helpful getting a diagnosis is to understand one's self better , insights on further treatment ect;

like isnt that a contradictory to what you are saying ?!?! I like my therapist but this comment got me confused, maybe even a little offended- it just feels very dismissive about something that seems VERY IMPORTANT and is a BIG revelation for me!!!

This feels like a big deal to me, because it’s the first time in my life that someone has looked at me and said, “Hey, you’re showing signs of a mental health disorder.” And not just in passing — it actually seems to show up a lot in my life. I’m a 26-year-old Hispanic woman, and let’s be honest — in our culture, mental health isn’t something we really talk about or take seriously. So hearing this now, at this age, feels heavy… but also kind of validating..

So saying all of this to say, the more prolonged I am in finding a place to get an evaluation/diagnosis, the less incentive I have to even get one and just end up procrastinating.

Im not sure why im sharing this. lol this blog is, and this site, for that matter, is dead. Im just tired.. I just can't shake the feeling that I've always felt different from my family, friends, society.. it really is exhausting when you dont know whats wrong with you and trying to find to navigate the world around you. Navigating the mental health industry with no insurance, getting turned down by people/doctors, people getting mad / annoyed at the things I do because they see a "pattern of behavoir or habits" in me

Gee its almost as if I could living with a potential undiagnosed disorder. But im not sure yet.

I know theres bigger problems in the world right now everything from trump being back into office, the deportations, to the introduction of the big fUGLy bill....which really is just the shit icing on this shit cake isn't if im talking about us healthcare / mental health.

Im not sure what else to say on here other than the fact im sick of this bullshit. I don’t have many close friends I can talk to about this—at least none who are nearby or easy to reach—and I don’t feel comfortable sharing these heavy thoughts with people I’m only just starting to get to know.

So im sharing it on here where strangers can see and judge my writings lol

I know im just venting to the void at this point, but I just need to organize my thoughts and feelings together. Since I'm off my mom's insurance now, I have to figure out my own coverage—just one more thing to stress about.

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“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

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yes

Heilung by Yuri Hill

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#Repost @gogreensavegreen

You might be more than one. You might be different ones at different times. 🫶🏽🫶🏽 you might not be one of these. There are more roles 💪🏽 but this is an amazing intro.

You can’t just like the idea and envision yourself in one of these roles you have to figure out how to be about it ♥️🫶🏽

Via @deiloh & @fablefulart

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Americans, our democracy is under threat.

Do you reject fascism and oppose the Trump-Musk coup? Want to do something, but aren’t sure what you can do to make a difference? Keep reading for ways big and small you can fight back:

Attend a Protest New to protesting? Here’s a primer for first-time protesters and a schedule of upcoming national days of action:

Mar 1st and ongoing (Tesla Takedown) Website | Find an event

Mar 4th (50501: 50 protests, 50 states) Website | Find an event

Mar 7th (Stand up for Science) Website | Find an event

Mar 8th (Women’s March) Website | Find an event

Search for future protests at /r/ProtestFinderUSA and join the mailing list of grassroots organizations like Indivisible to be alerted to future actions.

Put Pressure on Congress Want your elected officials to stand up to Trump-Musk and push back against the unconstitutional executive orders, disastrous DOGE cuts, and illegal funding freezes? Already calling your Reps and Senators daily using 5calls.org?

Then it’s time to escalate to in-person action. Visit their websites, join their mailing lists, follow their socials, and call their offices to find out when the next local event will be and make your voice heard. 

Applying pressure to congress works, and we are already seeing the results of constituent push back. House Democrats recently voted as a unified block against the Trump-sponsored billionaire tax cuts, with members breaking maternity leave and leaving the hospital to fly back to Washington just to cast their votes. And on the Republican side, negative town hall blowback has the GOP running scared.

If your congressperson is hiding from you, stage a protest event and put their cowardice on blast. For more information on how to implement these tactics, see the Indivisible congressional recess toolkit.

If your congressperson is already fighting the good fight, then make sure to thank them and provide encouragement to continue opposing the Trump-Musk regime. Courage is contagious, and vocal public support will help spur congress to fight that much harder. 

And finally, regardless of where you live, you can sign up to phone bank and reach out to voters in red congressional districts.

Get Out the Vote Did you know there are Special Elections as soon as April 1st that could flip control of the House back to Democrats? We simply cannot wait for the 2026 midterms, we must take action now! You can help get out the vote for Gay Valimont (FL-1), Joshua Weil (FL-6), and Blake Gendebien (NY-21).

In addition, the Muskrat is spending millions to buy the Wisconsin Supreme Court. Phone bank or write letters to keep a MAGA extremist off the high court and protect Wisconsin elections from future gerrymandering.

Fight the Broligarchy If you own TSLA stock, or *gasp* an actual Tesla vehicle, drop it like a scorching case of herpes, then join the picket line at your nearest Tesla showroom. 

On socials, delete your Nazi-infested X and Meta (Facebook, IG, Threads) accounts and join the open source BlueSky. If you must remain on Meta, at minimum change your account settings so Fuckerberg can’t profit from your data. 

Stop using Google search/Chrome and install privacy-focused alternatives like DuckDuckGo or Firefox. As a bonus, in the DuckDuckGo browser you can permanently hide AI garbage from your search results.

Show your monetary support for companies that have renewed their commitment to DEI programs (like Costco and Apple) and boycott those who have not (like Target and Amazon). Also look up how other corporations score on the democracy scale and adjust your spending accordingly.

 And last, but not least, pledge to join the General Strike!

Stay Informed Corporate media has capitulated to Trump. From the cancellation of minority-hosted shows on MSNBC to the Bezos takeover of the Washington Post editorial pages, MSM cannot be relied upon to provide unbiased coverage of the Trump-Musk regime.

Support independent journalists and media and follow AltGov accounts on Bluesky to stay informed as to what is actually going on in Washington.

Get to Know your Community Authoritarians want you to feel helpless and isolated because they know we the people vastly outnumber them. Get to know your neighbors and join a group/team/club - anything that gets you interacting with your local community whether it is political or not. 

Under Trump-Musk, federal programs like SNAP, Medicaid, Medicare, and even Social Security are in danger.  We will need to increasingly rely on our own communities to have our backs. Visit mutualaidhub.org to locate resources and learn how to start your own network.

And finally, remember that resistance is a marathon, not a sprint. So be sure to stop doomscrolling and simply enjoy life as AOC reminds us:

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If you see this on your dashboard, reblog this, NO MATTER WHAT and all your dreams and wishes will come true.

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You are not Pro-Life if you do not support:

Comprehensive accurate sex education for all students

Government programs meant to assist people in need (food stamps, affordable/free health care, housing assistance, etc…)

Paid family leave & other government programs/initiatives meant to assist families

Helping all refugees fleeing their countries when their lives are in danger

Abolishing the death penalty

Actually punishing sex offenders (instead of blaming the victim)

Gun reform / increased gun control

Equality for all minority groups

Programs/Initiatives supporting the elderly

Mental health services

Wearing masks and social distancing to protect your community during a pandemic.

You are not Pro-Life if you do not care about the lives of others in need of help outside of the womb.

You are Pro-Forced Birth.

You are Pro-Forced Birth.

You are Pro-Forced Birth.

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Hey! This is a thing still!

This was posted yesterday.

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Lost#2

Why is it that whenever I get a follower notification on tumblr it's always some sort of pornbot ? Every time I get a follower notification I assume it's someone who genuinely likes my stuff but where it gets suspicious is where it's a multitude of them following me back to back and the profile is always a girl is a risqué pose or some shit !?!

I feel less inclined to look at my notifications on tumblr this way when the only people that seem to follow me are people who want to spread their asscheeks to the camera... nothing wrong with anyone who wants to do that kind of hustle& no judgement... but it really pisses me off is when I have to check the profile to block and see all THAT by accident!!

On other note I'm still possibly depressed and irritated as usual what else is new. I feel as though my existence is nothing more than a blimp on the road. There's no one here to comfort me no one here to tell me I'm going to be alright. I don't think I'll ever be a good enough ... good enough person, daughter, student, friend, artist.

Anyway tumblr has a serious pornbot problem and should be taken more seriously and raised more awareness about by the platform itself.

(I shouldn't be surprised I guess especially of this site has been dead to people for awhile now)

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Twitter thread by user charitieropati from Nov 09, 2022, regarding the Indian Child Welfare Act (ICWA):

hearing justices on scotus ask “what if the child doesn’t want to be treated indian” during the ICWA hearings makes me so sick. They don’t understand how tribal sovereignty functions at all.

literally still in shock after hearing those comments. It is so scary that ICWA lies in the hands of people who have no understanding about how our tribal nations work. The hypotheticals and questions were just shocking.

Like no basic understanding. I feel so sick and anxious.

And the casual laughter in the courtroom & the question about natives being “at war” while tribal sovereignty is being threatened. It’s disrespectful and sick.

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By educating people about wolves it can help raise more Awareness. You can help support this Awareness Project with one of these handpicked Wolf Stone Bracelet. Only a limited in Stock.

=> GET YOUR WOLF AWARENESS STONE BRACELET HERE <=

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Some practice sketches of my girl

been awhile since I posted digital art on here, 

done in Photoshop 

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fuck this handmaids tale country.

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Lost

Does anyone else feel lost? Lost In Life ? like they aren’t meant to be here ..? I feel like Im not supposed to be here that everything would be better if i didn’t exist?

I feel like I try so hard to keep everything together inside that i forget how to function around the outside world.. 

I dont even feel like posting shit anymore on here because I feel like the stuff I post isn’t even good enough ... 

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 A portrait of 50′s Wanda from Wanda Vision 

Been awhile since I posted actual art here lol 

Frankly I haven't been doing so hot lately (also busy with school) in the meantime here's some mediocre fanart ;)