midwest-wizard

[midwest-wizard]

Making potions in the early morn (coffee with tooooo much creamer)

[midwest-wizard]

making potions 🧪 (instant coffee and redbull)

writing in my tome ✍️ (notesapp poetry)

sharing my wealth of knowledge 📜 (wizardblogging)

[midwest-wizard]

Not every wizard can be a goody two shoes, ok? Sorry my spell components aren't "ethically sourced" and I'm a "dragon poacher" who is "in violation" of the "endangered species act" but if any vegan sorcerers want to fight me about it just know that I've been drinking dragon blood for the past 10 days and it has made me magically ripped as fuck

[midwest-wizard]

[midwest-wizard]

consider: subclass of nechromancer. a mechromancer if you will. its basically just a wizard mechanic for undead machine creatures. the concept of some guy in overalls and a stupid wizard had covered in magic oil is now rotating in my brain so very quickly

you go to the mechromancer if your car battery dies and you dont want to buy a new one

[midwest-wizard]

girl help i unknowingly gave away a small but very human part of myself in exchange for immeasurable power

[midwest-wizard]

When in doubt just remember: WWWD

What Would a Wizard Do

[midwest-wizard]

Announcing my campaign to be on the Wizard Council this year

Benefits of voting for me:

No orb tax

Dissolving the archaic practice of “Banned Spells”

Universal familiar healthcare

I will stop the worm monster personally

Creating better relations with the Warlock Union and Druid Circle

I will turn you into a worm if you don’t

[midwest-wizard]

what if we both pondered an orb together (and we were both boywizards)

[midwest-wizard]

wizard meet-cute where you accidentally drop your tome and your hands touch when you go to pick it up at the same time and now you're both cursed