neutralgoodleftist

[neutralgoodleftist]

Me, still not over "Andor" twelve hours after finishing watching it. Just crying off and on about its brilliance, and then realising that Cassian ISN'T JUST a messenger for the Death Star plans.

Cassian Andor is a messenger. And his message is a simple one.

"Rebellions are built on hope."

A message given to him by a concierge on Ghorman, fighting for the survival of his people. A message he carried to Jyn Erso, a cynic who had no hope. A message that Jyn passed onto the rebels on Yavin as they faced uncertainty and annihilation. A message that passed to Leia Organa who fought her entire life to bring it to the rest of the galaxy.

[neutralgoodleftist]

[neutralgoodleftist]

the thing about andor is that it isn’t prophecy, it’s the oldest story we have.

fascism rises, again and again. the empire is only one mask it wears. it speaks different languages, waves different flags, but it’s always the same fear, the same cruelty. and every time, people who fight it –not jedi, not chosen ones– are farmers, students, workers, lovers.

a manifesto written in hiding, a prison break echoing “one way out”, a funeral that turns into a riot; the fire always starts small. a single act. a handful of people willing to stand up. it grows, and so does the cost. the prisons fill, the streets choke with fear, and still someone shouts. someone resists.

andor gets it: there’s no clean victory, no hero to save us. only people, scared and stubborn, who refuse to let the dark be the only thing that survives.

“it just keeps spreading, doesn’t it?”

[neutralgoodleftist]

2am Wikipedia spirals are truly something special.

[neutralgoodleftist]

it's been a decade but i'm still not over the insanity that is the movie Jupiter Ascending

spoilers ahead, but this movie was slammed when it was released. sitting pretty at a 27%/38% on rotten tomatoes, it was critiqued on essentially every single aspect by a large majority of viewers. almost everyone hated it. almost.

i can't speak for what the the wachowskis actually intended, but this movie is a homage to every 12 year old dreamer writing acidentally self insert stories with unrestrained enthusiasm.

the main character played by Mila Kunis is named Jupiter. no literally. Jupiter Jones.

movie opens with Jupiter living an uneventful, monotonous life. there's a montage of her waking up early, going to work as a house cleaner, waking up early, going to work as a house cleaner, repeat.

within 20 minutes of runtime she is about to be murdered by aliens but is saved bridal carry style by channing tatum rolling in on hover skates. yes exactly what you're picturing. he also has a laser gun that barks when he shoots it. no im not kidding.

channing tatum is a wolf man hybrid. his name is Caine Wise. yes, "dog man", exactly, his name is literally Dog Man. he has pointy ears. "bred for the military but that didn't work out for me". after he saves Jupiter, she is unconscious and wakes up with a gun next to her bc Caine "thought it would make her feel better". he is Guarded and Rough yet Kind and Gentle.

it is later in the movie revealed he used to have wings, pretty feather angel-wings looking wings, but they were ripped off because he broke the rules. he has scars on his back. it's all very man pain. the movie makes a poorly masked point of talking about how he's a wolf man without a pack while the camera is pointed at Jupiter.

Jupiter spends most of the movie alternating between fainting, being kidnapped and holding her own against people wanting to kill her. you know, she's Powerful and Cool and Kickass but also has hunky yet sensitive men saving her. at one point a man who planned to murder Jupiter insults her and Caine, pointing a gun at the guy, asks Jupiter "may i kill him" through his teeth but she says no so he doesn't. (she has a guard dog she literally has a guard dog im-).

she has several wardrob changes and she's either dressed in flannels, snassy space movie outfits or the most beautiful dresses you could imagine.

another character is Stinger Apini played by Sean Bean. he's a human honey bee hybrid. im still not joking. he gets little gold hexagon in his eyes sometimes. he uses "beeswax" as a swear.

while Caine and Stinger have a little "you betrayed me last time we saw each other" fight, a bunch of Stinger's bees start swarming Jupiter, following her movements like some kind of avatar water bending powers. this means she's royalty. because "bee's are genetically designed to recognize royalty" (sean bean says this with a completely straight face for which he deserves an award). Jupiter is space royalty. queen, to be exact. she's queen of a bunch of planets, including earth.

Jupiter Jones, normal human girl from a boring, monotonous life, is Queen of Earth.

she's one of the most important people in the universe and has a hot wolf man saving her at every turn. this movie was written for every little sensitive, creative child inside the heart of a adult clinging to their imagination and dreams.

the movie has about eight bad guys but oscar-winner and acclaimed actor eddie redmayne plays the top bad guy. eddie did this movie coming off the backs of Les Misérables and The Theory of Everything. i can only assume the casting director knew about a murder he’s committed and blackmailed him into doing this movie.

eddie's character name is Balem Abrasax (a fine, 'character name generator'-name) and he either whispers or blows out the speakers.

one hour into the movie it takes a break and does a 'space bureaucracy is like the DMV'-bit as Jupiter, with the help of a robot named Intergalactic Advocate Bob, tries to claim her title as queen. there's a montage where they are sent around to get documents so they can get other documents so they can get other documents only they can't get those documents before submitting the first document and-

jupiter gets a cool glowing tattoo on her wrist and then the movie jumps back into space opera and she's kidnapped and saved a few more times.

jupiter tries so hard to seduce Caine but he resist bc He's Broken and Dangerous and Does Not Deserve Her. the third act kicks off with Jupiter (the person) inside Jupiter (the planet) with Balem who will most certinly hurt her, so Stinger give Caine a pep talk about how much he loves Jupiter and he has to go save her.

mind, they've known each other for about two days and Jupiter has been kidnapped three times so they've only spent about half of that time together. but it's TRUE LOVE goddamnit. Caine looks like he's about to cry when Stinger tells him to go after the girl. then he sets his jaw very masculinely and proceed to fly a little spacecraft though the storm clouds dodging lightning

they kiss during the last fight, defeat the last bad guy and then movie cut to later. now Jupiter is waking up early and happily go about cleaning houses, only she pauses to look at the glowing tattoo on her wrist proving she owns Earth and after work she goes on a date with her wolf man boyfriend who got his wings back so now she uses the hover boots and they go flying together. the end.

movie has so many stupid little quips and bits and funny quotes. the amount of fanfic tropes used would kill you if you did a take a shot-game. it's so silly. so so silly. it's stupid and the pacing is atrocious and the dialouge is so campy it hurts sometimes and the action scenes are a mess of visual effects than nearly give you motion sickness and they are about ten minutes each which is nine minutes to long and i love this movie with all my heart.

it's the most comfort movie to ever comfort. it's little younger me sitting up at night dreaming up insane stories. it's younger me pretending to hoverboard alongside the car on long drives. it's wanting to feel special and loved and go on cool adventures. it's endless imagination wrapped up in a stupid little story with stupid little characters with stupid little names written with pure love for the child inside every creative person.

i will die defending this movie. go watch it

[neutralgoodleftist]

I really need to look into this!

FINALLY got around to dumping Spotify after their CEO continued to prove he's a fresh turd. (As if being a billionaire, not paying musicians, shoving AI garbage at us, and having an atrocious carbon footprint wasn't bad enough, he's now the chair of a AI-based weapons manufacturing company.)

I used TuneMyMusic ($24 annual fee you can cancel immediately, effectively paying only once) to transfer almost every single song from our Spotify account to Tidal. Tidal already has much better sound quality and they pay their artists much better. It migrated over 99% of our music, too, so there wasn't a huge loss.

[neutralgoodleftist]

BIG fan of all the hijackings that happened. I agree with everyone and everything. From OP to the end. Y’all state your thoughts so well. Thanks for writing them somewhere that people can enjoy.

after seeing a great post by @abathroomwallfreshlypaintedover about why nicky and joe feel different in the old guard 2 i haven’t been able to stop thinking about it, especially as it relates to nicky (because he’s my favourite guy ever actually)

i’ve gone into detail (in this post) about how the contrast of nicky’s softness with his deadliness and insane skill is what makes him such a fucking incredible character, and after their post about how the sequel hardened nicky and joe’s edges a bit, leaning more into the traditional masculinity they (especially nicky) never really displayed in the first movie, it just stands out so starkly to me.

yes, queer men can be traditionally masculine! the issue is not that the movie shows queer men who like cars and act like bros and face danger while laughing. it’s that the first movie established that nicky and joe are not those queer men.

in the first movie nicky is consistently soft spoken, and the traits at the forefront of his portrayal are his kindness, compassion and gentleness. that is what the first movie felt most important in establishing who this man was. and while it isn’t an issue to see a sillier, louder side to him, that being the forefront of what we see of him in the sequel feels odd in comparison. the nicky in the first movie wouldn’t laugh at joe’s severed thumb without at least a moment of concern. the nicky and joe of the first movie wouldn’t give two shits about the car they drove (do you seriously think these grandpas are up to speed - pun intended - with all that?). and while I think the argument IS in character, the movie could’ve better emphasised the root of nicky’s upset being joe’s lie rather than booker’s betrayal, and show joe going to great lengths to make nicky see how sorry he is, just as he’d gone to great lengths to let the world know how he loved him. that extra layer of deep compassion and care that characterises everything about them last time felt stripped away.

on my second watch when it got to their little moment and nicky says ‘parla’ i realised that this was the moment it clicked that he felt different during the first half of the film. because i watched this moment and saw the smile he gave nile at the original family dinner. the smile he gave joe when he said meeting him was destiny. i watched nicky ask joe to talk to him and thought ‘there he is. that’s the nicky i knew.’ that’s what made me realise he was missing in the first place (well not missing, more like filtered)

nicolò di genova is not a typical action hero. he’s thoughtful and compassionate and he likes to cook and read. he isn’t hench or unemotional or an asshole. he’s kinda weird and awkward, he doesn’t fill silences or speak without reason and he stares at anything and everything with those big round eyes. he is not a masculine hero in a traditional sense, and this does not compromise his skill and awesomeness.

his softness is his strength. the fact that after so long he can still find the will to be gentle and loving is what makes him so special. that is a choice, that is something that defines him as a person. and while it was still there in pieces, the sequel shifted him more towards a traditional masculinity he has never been shown to align with.

[neutralgoodleftist]

Casual.

guys who invented love + textposts pt2

[neutralgoodleftist]

All these people saying ‘shut up that joe and nicky didn’t kiss! Let gay relationships just be wholesome! I’m gay and you don’t need to see them tongue to know they’re in a relationship! stop objectifying gay characters!’ you don’t get it. Youre entitled to your opinion but I don't think you get it. It’s about the Vietnamese antagonist being demoted to henchman so a well-known white blonde actress can be the main antagonist (an original character) instead. It’s about another original character being introduced whose only contribution is to be the wise asian man trope. It’s about the toning down of the two most disgustingly romantic characters to the point where they barely touch eachother, when they were previously on screen spooning in bed, holding eachothers faces, and yes, kissing. Specifically kissing in a van surrounded by homophobes that they then murder in some pretty top tier comedy. 

I’m not upset because i was wanting to get my rocks off. Im concerned because these were decisions that were made, and in the era of almost every movie needing corporate board approval, you need to question why these decisions are being made and who’s making them. Why can’t we show our two gay characters kissing in their only intentionally romantic scene together? Why can’t the vietnamese character be the main villain she was originally set up to be? Why has the new asian character presumably spent his immortality amassing knowledge, and not fighting like everyone else, with no explanation?

At the end of the day it was a bad movie. Plot holes everywhere, rough acting, Madame Webb style dubs. But I still think it’s important to acknowledge the slideback that’s happened here and it's okay to be upset about it.

[neutralgoodleftist]

I feel strongly about all of this too

I've been trying to write something about the action in TOG2 and it's honestly hard because the more I look at it, the more things I notice that are just stupid, lazy or nonsensical. And it just makes me annoyed on behalf of everyone who worked really hard on making the action in the first movie so damn good.

Because the action in TOG1 was really, really good. It felt grounded and like there were real stakes and consequences. It was emotionally impactful, rich in character details, and it also looked fucking badass. It stood out from the general slop of weightless, bloodless PG-13 blockbuster action. And it seems clear to me from behind the scenes videos that Gina Prince-Bythewood approached the violence in the film with a lot of care and intention, and that the filmmaking team had really thought through every detail of fight choreography, weapons, set design, practical and VFX, cinematography, lighting, and score.

Obviously what makes an action sequence "good" is somewhat subjective, but I think a useful rule of thumb is: good action should tell a story. We should learn something about the characters and their relationships through the way they fight, and be able to track changes in those things over the course of the film.

TOG1 was chock full of beautiful action storytelling. The action sequences were for the most part not long, but they were full of character and relationship information, and they were a delight to watch over and over again.

Nile and Andy's fight on the plane tells us (and Andy) a huge amount about who Nile is as a person--that she's determined, resourceful, brave and stubborn; sneaky and gutsy enough to restrain Andy while she's sleeping; skilled enough to land a hit on her in a brawl; and tough enough to keep fighting even after Andy breaks her arm. Andy's solo fight in the church tells us that she's the best of the best, but it's come at a cost, and that she will do things alone even when help is available right in the next room. Joe and Nicky have the van speech moment, but the practiced way they fight side by side, the way they always look for each other first in a fight and are still genuinely scared and enraged watching the other one get hurt or killed--these things tell us just as much about their relationship.

And one of the unique things about TOG is that the characters really fought as a team. I have written before about the phenomenon of characters fighting next to each other but not with each other; once you start noticing this in movies you will not be able to unsee it. I think there are a number of reasons for this trend in fight choreography, from individualist writing choices (wanting to showcase each character as their own Special Unique Hero in preparation for their spinoff film even when they're part of a team), to the practical reality that if you're filming a bunch of actors in front of a green screen, they may literally not have been in the room at the same time as each other.

TOG1 didn't do that. It opened and closed with two great ensemble fights, where we saw the characters being aware of each other in space, helping each other, covering each others' backs, and checking on each other, as if they were actually all people in the same room who cared about one another. It meant we had great character moments like Joe running to Nicky's side after the kill floor regeneration and the whole team following Nile's lead to cover Andy with their own bodies in the final fight when she's mortal but still not acting like it.

In a sequel, we should have seen how these relationships have changed, now that Andy is mortal, Nile is part of the team, and Booker is not.

The first action sequence should have allowed us to see the new status quo. How does the team work together now? Are there friction points, like Nile still being less experienced and Andy forgetting she's not invulnerable? How do they integrate someone like Copley, who has some of the same tech skills that Booker did, but really shouldn't be in the middle of the action when there are other options?

Instead we got...idek what was going on at that Temu ass Bond villain mansion. What even was that mission? It was obviously planned, but they walked in in broad daylight, with no weapons, no body armor for either of the mortals, and half a plan they were seemingly making up on the fly. (We see them on a mission right at the beginning of TOG1 and they are stealthy, silent, and armed to the teeth. This was. Not that.) In the first film, they are trying hard enough to keep a low profile that Andy deletes a photo of herself in a tourist's selfie. And then we see their worst fears about what happens when people discover their secret realized! They add Copley to the team explicitly to help them cover their tracks. You would think if anything they'd be more cautious now. But they're firing guns into the air and going on very noticeable car chases because...it looks cool I guess?

Pairing the two mortals together in the fight makes NO sense. And then it makes even less sense that they split up once they're inside the house and don't cover each other's backs! There is a moment when Copley and Andy are taking cover and Copley seems to need to draw Andy's attention to the fact that she's standing next to a wall of swords. Motherfuckin Andy??? The woman who keeps a sword bucket by the safehouse door??? Gtfo.

Nile's and Copley's positions should have been switched from the beginning. It almost seems like the fight was choreographed to be that way and then got changed at some point. Copley could've even gotten to drive the boat into the garden when things went off the rails! Then the "remember you're mortal" line would have meant something and revealed information about how he's changed in the six months he's spent with them, other than just being lazy exposition.

What was the objective? Kill the bad guy? That's not even really their deal. Yes obviously they kill people...but go back and listen to Copley's speech from TOG1 when he's describing their impact on history. Almost everything he mentions involves rescuing civilians. Which is exactly what they thought they were going to do on the South Sudan job. We don't know anything about this guy and we don't care, so we don't have any sense of stakes.

I could go on with nitpicking but the overall point is that it feels like none of these things were thought through from a character and worldbuilding point of view. Building an action sequence around what looks cool with no sense of overall coherence instead of starting with "what story are we telling?" is a recipe for a bad action sequence.

The Andy and Quỳnh fight in Rome is the one action sequence that works, because someone somewhere did put thought into it. It has a story and an emotional throughline. The choreography is actually telling a story (even after 500 years apart, they know each other well enough to block every strike; Andy doesn't actually want to fight Quỳnh and keeps trying to get her to stop) and they're both acting their faces off. It's like a vestige of a better movie that's still in there somewhere.

Unfortunately, all the problems with the opening sequence recur in the (too long) climax at the World's Least Secure Nuclear Facility. If there was any time we would expect to see all six of them fighting back to back and acting like a team, it would be in the finale. But no!!!

They enter the facility as a group. Nile is even in front!

But then they immediately split up into trios, pairs and solo fights, and stay that way for the rest of the sequence. And then complain about Discord trying to separate them! Guys y'all did this to yourselves with a stupidass battle plan.

This means the emotional impact of the climax of the film is completely fractured. Andy is the only one to see Booker die. Copley is maybe (?) killed off-screen and we get no confirmation about whether he's dead or alive. Nile gets the information about her immortality-ending powers alone, and then gets stabbed by Discord and captured alone. Andy fights Discord alone, on the world's most boring concrete slab.

It's the complete opposite of everything that made the first film powerful and unique.

Good action is not just about the coolest moves or the most outlandish stunts; it is about using physicality to say something. TOG1 did that really, really well, and TOG2 just does not measure up.

[neutralgoodleftist]

Andor

It's so difficult to decide who my favorite character was.

Was it Kleya because she practically built the rebellion from the ground up and was always pragmatic and serious and did what needed to be done and pushed others to do the same?

Was it Kino Loy because he just wanted to keep his head down and make it out until he realized that hope was never a set of outside circumstances, but individual actions?

Was it Karis Nemik because he was so pure, sweet, dedicated, and believed in Cassian, even when no one else could and fought because he believed in freedom so optimistically because he believed in people?

Was it Maarva because even when everyone told her to stand down she kept standing up, even after she died? (what an icon)

Was it Lonni because he played the long game, looked the enemy in the eyes every day, chose to be brave and pass along vital info to the rebellion?

Was it Mon Mothma because she believed so fiercely in truth and liberty that she would give up everything - her family, her home, her job, her comfort - so that the people of Ghorman and the rebels might finally hear some sort of justice in her speech?

Was it Vel or Bix or Cassian or K2 or Wilmon or Luthen or the Ghor bellhop?

I don't know, but I'm sad it's over and I'm sad I will never see them again. What a powerful story because even the most minor characters had impact and emotion.

[neutralgoodleftist]

I loved how vague Jyn & Cassian's love is even before Andor came out. That's the tragedy right there. They never even got to see if they would've fallen in love. A spark is there. But Cassian & Jyn will never get to have anything more with anyone. All they have is each other in their final moments.

Shipping Bix & Cassian is valid. And shipping Jyn & Cassian is valid. Because in Cassian's mind, Bix left him a year ago. I think that if he and Jyn had lived, he would've rushed back to Bix and his baby. But that doesn't mean he and Bix wouldn't have had a long way to go in falling back in love.

And it doesn't mean that Jyn & Cassian never had a spark of feelings. It just means that either way Cassian lives or dies, part of the tragedy is that Jyn & Cassian never get to see if there could have been something there. Either way, their lives together are cut short.

[neutralgoodleftist]

It is actually so difficult loving Star Wars. It is so difficult existing in the real world and wanting to talk to literally anyone about Star Wars. Andor is a WORK OF ART. You finally find one person who is also a “Star Wars fan” and they think The Mandalorian is the best shit since sliced bread (side note I also thoroughly enjoy that show and love Pedro, but really?). They watch Andor and think it’s…fine? Boring? Not bad but waiting for it to be great?

Did we watch the same show? How are you not connecting to the story? Just because there aren’t lightsabers and enough characters that you recognize from the original stories? REALLY?

Fine. I’ll just go back to loving Star Wars alone.

Who do I talk to about Mon Mothma’s speech? Nemik’s manifesto? How do you not think that the entire story is devastating and beautiful in its predictability. Of course we know what’s going to happen. That’s the tragedy of it. That’s the beauty. Cassian never knows what happens to his sister, because of course he doesn’t. Mon loses her daughter. Bail has no clue what exists just around the corner for him and his family. Dedra and Syril never had a chance because the system eats itself.

We know how it ends, but they don’t. None of them actually know for sure that any part of this fight succeeds, but they fight anyway.

[neutralgoodleftist]

For the love of fiction!!!!!!! Please!

filmmakers and audiences and critics alike all need to start suspending their disbelief again

[neutralgoodleftist]

Crafting the character of barba - and his relationship with benson - is very important to Raul 🥺 #SVU25

source: TODAYshow

[neutralgoodleftist]

*cough* Barson is better than Bensler. *cough*

[neutralgoodleftist]

I found the barson fic i've been searching for, it was literally in my bookmarks lol