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evan “anythings worth trying to stay out of your nightmares” rosier

barty “when you cut a hole into my skull, do you hate what you see like i do?” crouch jr

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you know you're too deep when you start calling your favourite characters "stupid fuck" and "asshole"

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sirius and barty

fated in every universe to hate eachother. designed by god to piss eachother off. in every universe, in every timeline, i am destined to meet you. and it's going to suck really bad for both of us

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Regulus at some point: I just don’t find women attractive

Dorcas: You’ve clearly never seen Marlene in a suit. Hotter than the actual sun and I stand by that

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Dare I say Regulus after Sirius left?

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My fav thing is when all four of the Marauders have an ASTRONOMICAL amount of beef with Barty. and for no other reason than him dating Regulus. like leave ur brother and his bf ALONE Sirius and co.

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sirius: i cannot believe you’re dating my brother

james: i have taste

sirius: he used to collect dried beetles in a jar and whisper to them at night

regulus: they were traumatized, sirius

james: yeah pads, they were traumatized. dont be rude to your brother

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The Moon Will Sing

If you look closely they have matching bracelets

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do you ever just … picture a whole scene, a whole fanfiction in your head, you know how to place every single word of the english dictionary that you need (or your language dictionary), you know how to structure your sentences, you know just what your characters are going to say to each other and then… and then you just open microsoft word.

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Will - Jegulus - @into-the-jeggyverse - word count: 713

“What are you lot doing here?” 

Regulus had been expecting Pandora around for a cuppa and a gossip. Their long standing Sunday appointment. What he was not expecting was for Pandora to show up with Barty, Evan, Dorcas, Marlene, Mary, Lily, Peter, Remus and Sirius. 

“We're here for the reading of the Will, Reggie.” Sirius explained, somberly, as if this was the most normal thing for him to say. 

“What the fu-” 

“Ahh, right on time,” a voice behind Regulus proclaimed loudly. 

Regulus turned and saw James standing behind him in one of his favourite work suits. Regulus's jaw dropped and his eyebrows were knit together. 

“Jamie, what is going on?”

“Please, do come through,” James said in his posh voice and then waved the group in before he walked into the living room. 

Regulus had never been more confused in his whole life and that was saying something, given he grew up with Sirius. He just stood holding the front door open. 

“Regulus, could you join us in the front room, please?” Came the request from James' posh work voice. 

Regulus blinked and shook his head. Then he closed the door and wandered into the front room. 

James had set the room up so there were rows of chairs, dinning and arm, facing one of the end tables, that had a thick, A4 envelope and a glass of water on it and James sat behind it.

Regulus slowly sat down in the middle of the front row, in the only free seat and looked around at the others. None of whom looked the slightest bit confused. 

Pandora leaned over to him and quietly said, “Don't worry, Reg. Once this is done, we're still heading over to the hotel for dinner and to get ready for tomorrow. We just need to get this bit done first.” 

This cleared nothing up for Regulus at all. But there was quiet as James stood up. 

“Friends, thank you for taking the time to be here with us today. We appreciate you giving up your time this afternoon and as we all have a busy evening and very busy day ahead of us tomorrow, I will keep this brief.”

James picked up the envelope and began to open it in a ridiculously dramatic manner. Regulus huffed a chuckle but was elbowed by Remus, who was sitting on his other side and shushed him. 

Regulus rolled his eyes as James started at him and shook his head seriously. 

“The Last Will and Testament of James Fleamont Potter.”

“James, what are yo-,” Regulus started. 

“Shh, Reggie, there will be time later for questions!” Sirius interrupted him.

“For the love of,” Regulus threw his arms in the air. “Fine, do carry on, James Fleamont Potter.” 

“Tomorrow, I, James Fleamont Potter, will marry Regulus Arcturus Black and as such, I must bequeath away the following items.” Regulus squinted and his face became slightly pinched, waiting for the other shoe to drop. “To Sirius, I leave my Captain America and Winter Soldier action figures because Reggie has declared them to be childish.” Regulus nodded his approval.

“YES!” Sirius cheered. “Stucky forever, baby!” 

“To Barty and Evan, I jointly bequeath this napkin,”James held up a clear plastic wallet with what appeared to be a used napkin in it. “This napkin contains some of Reggie's dry saliva and hair, which can be used to clone him, so you're no longer mad at me for stealing him away.”

“What?!” Regulus exclaimed at the same time as Barty and Evan cheered and high-fived each other.

“To Remus, I leave my favourite Gryffindor Quidditch sweater because Reggie has declared that Slytherin is better and, although he is wrong, being a married man means I have to lie to him.”

“Oh, fuck you, Potter.” Regulus declared, having had enough of James’ nonsense, and jumped to his feet. As he started to storm away the whole room burst into laughter. “And fuck all of you too!” As he reached the door, he turned and said, “Oh, and Sirius, you can still keep those stupid toys.” 

As he stomped into the kitchen, he heard a very loud “yes” from Sirius and a very loud “baby, no!” from James.

Regulus chuckled to himself. He was marrying an idiot and, unfortunately, he couldn't be happier. 

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James: Go big or go home.

Regulus: Jamie, go home. Please, for once in your life, I’m begging you—

James, whispering: I’m going big.

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oh... you're cis? like you still use the gender your parents picked out for you? no i mean that's fine if youre happy with it...... i guess i expected something a bit more mature :/ you sure you don't wanna try a new one? okay dude....

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wolfstar as sally bowles (sirius) and brian roberts (remus) variants from cabaret

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this is your friendly reminder that David, Les, Sarah, Mayer, and Esther Jacobs are all canonically Jewish and erasing that part of their story and identity is NOT cool.

thank you, good night.

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sirius does not refer to remus as “my boyfriend” or “my partner.” he calls him “my moon,” “my person,” “my soft little cryptid,” “my favorite librarian who bites,” etc.

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Remus: Do you even know what personal space is?

Sirius: *wrapped around him like a koala* I’ve heard rumors.