owlpile

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I have the opposite of what the catholics have going on. I think that if I'm irredeemably wretched and imperfect, that's not my problem, and it's god and my parents who should be begging for forgiveness about that. Why would I be ashamed of being their creation, they should be ashamed of creating me.

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posting this for no particular reason

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I know using child soldiers violates SO MANY moral and actual laws but war crimes be damned, this boy is awesome

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This is a post of appreciation for the stable guy in BoTW/TotK who keeps being tasked (by me) with retrieving my horse (stuck in dangerous places) and always delivers

Cliffs? Sure

Rivers? Got it

Gleeok fire range? Not a problem

A part of the map where reality breaks and ground no longer exists? Already done

Dude is the most powerful creature in all Hyrule and simply chooses to use his might to fetch my horse, who I've named DUI

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"it's all in your head" correct! unfortunately I am also in there

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"if tumblr dies you can find me on bluesky" "if tumblr dies you can find me on Instagram" if tumblr dies you cannot find me. It's over. I'm free.

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SEND HELP (and caffeine)

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Zelda travelling around Hyrule after the Calamity and people are tripping over themselves to tell her stories about the Hero because they love that feral cryptid mad man and are so proud of him

'I met him when I was about to get eaten by a Hinox...he jumped off a horse, fired 12 arrows in the blink of an eye and then got smacked in the face with a tree...but then he came back and hacked away at it's legs with this stupidly big sword until it finally died'

'He was wearing this weird patched together mask that looked like a monster but he made enough curry for everyone so we didn't like to ask'

'But...the hero was a girl? She wore these lovely green silks and every time she came out of the Gerudo Canyon she had a bag full of electric safflina to sell to Beedle over there. The Gerudo think she's an amazing fighter, which says a lot, and she always thanked me for looking after her horses when she went into the desert'

'I swear to Hylia that he ran through here wearing nothing but his underwear and a mask shaped like a leaf...claimed he was looking for the Children of the Forest. Sorry, Princess, but I'm not sure he was quite right in the head at the time'

'He used to creep in here silently wearing this grey mask and with enough lizards and beetles that we could make enough elixirs to last for a month. Not sure I ever saw his face without it'

And the entire time Link is stood neatly dressed, three steps away, listening to every word and no one pays him the slightest bit of attention. Because none of them cotton on that 'prim and proper Royal Knight' Link and 'I will defeat this Lynel with a stick, a pot lid and a bucket load of adrenaline' Wild Child Hero is the same man. Especially with how many masks he owned.

When they walk away and are out of sight and earshot Zelda just raises her eyebrow with a smile and he is like '...I can explain...it made sense at the time'

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Sometimes little pleasures in life are loadbearing. Whenever someone is like "If you'd just give up tea and coffee and sugar and--" im like I'll stop you right there. Because if you finish that sentence i am going to kill everyone in this building and then myself. If i have to face the horrors of the world without my little jar of caramel flavoured instant coffee i am going to go full American Psycho. Believe it or not, my main priority in life is not to have perfect teeth or be an Olympic athlete or look like a supermodel, but to actually enjoy living, because I spent far too long not doing that and it royally sucked. And boy, some people don't like hearing that. Particularly dentists

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pretentious moment incoming but why is everyone's idea of fashion so fucking boring these days. why the fuck did my manager just ask me "what's with the scarf". "what's with the scarf" fuck man do I need a reason to wear a faggy little scarf now? you could just say "nice scarf man". what's with your attitude

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bored? have you tried

clamoring at the walls of your cage

ripping apart your furniture

howling at your favorite celestial body

looking at yourself in the mirror with crazy eyes

putting your hands in damp soil

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A store I kinda like released a zodiac-themed t-shirt collection. Which is nice, in theory.

In practice - I don't think people who in large part believe in manifestation will be willing to walk around with the word "cancer" across their chests

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I'm starting to think horses may be cursed

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I’m still not over „depression, anxiety, rabies exposure” being on my medical record IN THAT SPECIFIC ORDER

anyway I gotta get one of those funky collar tags that dogs get after they’re vaccinated. I want to make a necklace