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If I were Amanda Seyfried I simply would have chosen gay Colin Firth to be my dad. I mean what were her other options? James Bond who can't sing? Pennywise's dad? The choice is clear.

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james acaster: repertoire

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i love student housing. i’m in the common room waiting for a friend and there’s some dude crying on the couch w a bunch of his friends around him and i can only hear bits and pieces but someone asked him “who gets the minecraft server if you guys break up?” and he started crying harder and a 3rd person reached over to smack the guy who asked it on the back of the head

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the walking dead, game of thrones, and breaking bad were just superwholock for men

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you know how people call other people like “king” or “queen” endearingly? do you think we’ll be like “omfg CEO” in a post-capitalist future 

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This is simply the best thing I’ve ever seen from an NHL Brand Twitter Account™️

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Last week I joked that my very cerebral, retired-police-chief-grandpa is basically Holt from Brooklyn 99 and then today someone said, “damn, we’re out of decaf” and he just deadpans “well there’s no need to get hysterical.”

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Say what you will about “friends” but all of the memes about how dumb and unrealistic it is have in-universe explanations

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tumblr is the only social media site where it’s completely useless to have a lot of followers

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why the hell are we still on this stupid website