pictchuthinking

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„Ich bin Raum. Ich bin Licht. Ich empfange das Leben – aber ich entscheide, was in mir bleibt. Seine Schwere berührt mich, doch sie gehört nicht zu mir.“

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Your love is my addiction. Your renunciation is my withdrawal. Your affirmation is my drug, your resentment is my drug wear off. Your joy is my dopamine, your sadness and distance, my cortisol. Your love my support, your negativity my black hole. Your touch, my refuge. Your desire is my confirmation. Your devaluation is my darkness.

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Desire. passion. Kisses. Domission. Submission. Heart. Love. Guide.

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Irrational. Longing. Desire. Demand. Day and night. Opposites. Love. Jealousy. Pain. Reconciliation. Tears. Heart palpitations. Looks. Your look. Your will. Your love. My desire. One heart. Lack of understanding. Need for freedom. Need for possession. Flowers. Love letters. Tokens of love. Affection. Rejection. Music. Touches. Shudder. Trance. Forgive and forget. Doubt. Trust. Romance. Courage. Risk.

-Love-

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#personalcare

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#Henry Ford #thinkingforward

Who always does what he knows, always beeing that, what he is.

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I wonder if you also think about me so much. Whether you also miss me, whether you can bear the separation. Whether there is still a bit of longing for me in you. You act like this is all easy for you. I miss you every damn day. I don't know how to rationally deal with the pain of when it will finally stop. I can't stop thinking that we couldn't have made it work. We made it this far, but it's all over. We broke up, the last day was full of tears because we both didn't want it. Today I heard a speaker who said that a relationship is held together by the faith of both. Everything else is not something that must always coincide. The belief in the relationship is what keeps a relationship together. Should we have believed in ourselves more? It doesn't feel like it's an ending, I just can't see it as an ending. You said you don't want me anymore. I think to myself, maybe if you got to know the new me you would want me. I have such enormous self-doubt, I feel like nothing, for whom should I cook, for whom should I bring joy to the day. With whom can I laugh as much as with you. I want to take you in my arms every time. Unreturned love is, I think, the worst feeling a person can feel. Why didn't we fight with our feelings.

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Lass dir von niemandem, der noch nie in deinen Schuhen gesteckt hat, sagen, wie du deine Schnürsenkel zu binden hast. 🙏🏼

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Ich glaube man lernt erst wirklich was Schmerz ist, wenn man vor der Person steht die man über alles liebt und weiß, dass es Zeit ist zu gehen.

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“Keine Ahnung, vielleicht will ich einfach nur in den Arm genommen werden, bis es aufhört weh zu tun.”

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Nur, weil du Ablehnung erfahren musstest, bedeutet das nicht, dass du nicht liebenswert, nicht schön oder nicht attraktiv genug bist. Manchmal passt es und manchmal nicht - so ist es eben. Mach dir nichts daraus. Und jetzt hör auf dir irgendetwas einzureden, das nicht der Wahrheit entspricht. Du bist schön, liebenswert und noch so vieles mehr.

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Loneliness

A feeling that occupies me again and again. Since you are missing, it sometimes torments me very intensely. Why can't we humans be happy and content alone. I long for the affection, for the person who says, "I want you by my side for the rest of my life". Your words, in an emotional moment in your journal. I can't get those words out of my head. How deep can a bond between two people be, how fascinating can an attraction between two people be, please. The best example is the sexual attraction of two people. Objectively, what we are doing is disgusting. Subjectively, sex and the attraction of two people is the absolute most fascinating thing you can experience between two people. We turn off our brains and purely let our primal instincts, our drives, our behaviors and desires, some of which can be traced back to childhood, run their course. We allow ourselves to have no taboos and to do only what gives pleasure to ourselves or our counterpart. No social compulsion or no social taboo. We increase the whole thing and want to go further, we want to feel where the limits of the other are, how intensively we ourselves (somehow an egoistic thought) can trigger the other, as long as it still pleases him and that only by our actions. We want this confirmation that we are good at something by playing with the opposite and getting the appropriate reaction for it. The question I ask myself, how is it possible to build a bond between two people that is so intense that you can't imagine life without the other. Is it because we can't live alone and need a counterpart to keep bringing us back to our equilibrium? Or is it because we allow ourselves to be played with our psyche and feelings and therefore build an emotional dependence? Or can we love from completely free piece because the person is a fascination for us? Is it not then however somewhere the envy that one would like to be exactly like this person? How did this world then imagine the with each other among the people? Why do we always wage wars when there is something like love? Why are there people who have been corrupted and have to drag others into their abyss? Which brings me back to the next point, many are corrupted because they have not experienced love. So love is a certain dependence on other people because they make you feel essentially important? To have a purpose in this world, to live a purpose for others? What if we could give ourselves so much love that we wouldn't need anyone else. Would we then fail as a society because we would no longer want to develop social competence?

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Ich habe das Gefühl mich ständig immer wieder selbst zu verlieren, es ist schwer die Person zu sein die man möchte, Kraft zu haben, sich immer wieder hoch zu pushen, dass Gefühl zu haben, man kann sich nirgends fest halten und muss sich immer wieder selbst hoch helfen. Ich muss selbstständig sein, bin allein und muss glücklich damit sein. Ich treffe bald jemanden, aber ich bin nervös, irgendwo würde ich mir neben dem bedeutunglosen Sex wünschen, jemanden wirklich wichtig zu sein. Vorallem dir.