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people don't talk enough about how fucking funny it is that bruce can sub in his kids as batman when he's too busy. like can you imagine it from the league's perspective? imagine you have this really mysterious, geniusly scary guy that you know next to nothing about, never cracks a smile and yet always comes out on top, and one day he shows up to a league meeting and there's just something... off. about him.

you can't pin it down because he's literally acting exactly the same as usual and there's no reason to think there's anything wrong, but maybe he shifted in his seat one to many times, or he looked just a tad bit too bored during green lantern's case review, but something's just... odd. so you quietly ask superman after the meeting if anything's up with the bat bcs you know those two are closer and also clark can hear heartbeats so if something's wrong surely he'll pick it up? and without hesitation he leans over to you and mumbles 'yeah batman was busy, that's his 17 yr old son. he's a crime lord and kills people sometimes though so we're not allowed to let him into the weapons department.' and then walks away like it's normal.

like the whiplash the league must go through every time they realise that no, this is not their fearless dark and brooding leader, this is in fact one of his dipshit kids being forced to sub in bcs the real batman broke an ankle, is incredible.

wonder woman: so that's my proposed plan, what are your thoughts batman?

batman: hn. i think that- *voice raising two octaves* oh shit hold on my phones buzzing

the league:

batman, answering the phone and immediately dropping the Bat Posture™: what do you mean- aw come on little wing that's not fair! but- no, NO DON'T YOU DARE TELL ALFRED I'LL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU- IM SORRY OK I'LL BUY YOU MORE- *catches sight of the league watching him, baffled* *stiffens* ok listen i promise to replace them but i gotta go, please show me mercy iloveyoubye *hangs up*

the league:

batman:

batman: *coughs awkwardly*

superman: *sighs*

batman, to superman: ...red hood found out i ate his chocolate pretzels-

superman, shaking his head: just... just stop.

the flash: so this isn't batman either, is it?

wonder woman: if this one's also a criminal im losing my mind.

superman, tiredly: no no, this one isn't a criminal. this one's actually a cop.

batman: *sinks down in his seat* b's gonna kill me

green lantern, mystified: where does he keep GETTING you all from!?

'batman' dick, who made a pact with jason to Always Fuck With Bruce Whenever The Opportunity Arises: batman is a whore.

they think they've finally sussed out all 2 of batman's kids and then one day during a meeting 'batman' ends up on a 30 minute rant about different hacking methods this tech villain could be using that results in him half way through a sentence breaking off to say '-oh uncle clark could you pass me that pen- thanks, anyway so-' and then five minutes after that when the league have all been exchanging incredulous looks he finally freezes and is like. SHIT.

wonder woman: you're different from the other two, aren't you?

batman: maybe i am maybe i'm not, you can't prove it.

wonder woman:

green lantern: so like, are you new or have you just managed to avoid sub duty up until now?

superman, coughing: actually, this is this ones ninth occasion of replacing batman. you've just never realised before.

the league:

batman: yeah actually the other two are kinda mad i lasted longer than them...

the flash: how the fuck does he keep getting kids with the exact same build as him!??!?

'batman' tim, spent 20 minutes padding the suit out so he would look the part, still mad that bruce keeps palming WE work off on him: oh he forces us to take steroids for it.

the league, concerned:

superman, pinching the bridge of his nose: now come on red robin-

batman, fully tearing up and looking distraught: PLEASE uncle clark, it HURTS, you can't keep COVERING FOR HIM!

superman, frantically to the league: this one lies.

bonus

the league, squinting at batman:

the league: ...

superman: *head in his hands, too disappointed to do anything*

the league: *silently exchanging looks, wondering if anybody's brave enough to say anything*

duke as batman, fully aware this is fucking stupid but jason and tim fell on the floor laughing when dick came up with the idea and frankly, he wanted to see if anybody would have to guts to call him out: so, are we all ready to start the meeting?

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guys i just wanted you to know this is the real actor of regulus in the movie :

… i don’t know how to feel about this

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Insane how the Marauders fandom saw the name “Dorcas Meadowes” on exactly one page of a long ass book series and unanimously decided that ah yes. Dorcas Meadowes. We all know her. That morally grey lesbian who will commit every crime in the book to protect/avenge her dumbass girlfriend.

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regulus may still be breathing BUT I AM NOT. THAT CHAPTER KILLED ME

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Every day I tell myself James would want me to go to sleep early and get a good nights rest and I plan on doing so but then the evil spirit of Regulus Black comes to me to whisper “or you could stay up until 2am doing absolutely nothing” and so I nod and do exactly as he says bc… he’s Regulus Black.

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Not to be a whore but I just wanted to say...

Timothée Chalamet

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you think your life is hard? try shipping drarry linny scorbus deamus jegulus wolfstar reddie stenbrough elmax byler lumax stancy stonathan byclair steddie. all at once.

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‘you look so tired’ i know babe, it’s because i’ve spent all night reading silly little fanfics of dead wizards from the 70s and wishing i existed in the same universe instead of sleeping.

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is the sun bothering you my king?

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to all drarry meme and drarry incorrect quote makers: thank you. it is currently midnight and i am verbally incoherent and only capable of laughing, giggling, and babbling about the sheer hilarity that i just read.

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"Why do you got to make everything gay?" Why do you got to make everything straight? 🤔

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"stop making all the stranger things characters gay"

bestie queer people flock together instinctively without even knowing or meaning to. they were all gay already, and dustin is their token ally. we didn't make them shit

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how can people enjoy shows without spending all of their freetime shitposting about them on tumblr and reading fanfiction of their ships until 3 am

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bitches be like “this is my comfort show” and it’s a show about a bunch of gay kids with daddy issues running around killing monsters from a different dimension.

its me, i am bitches

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wait, so ur telling me other people don’t totally fall inlove with shows/movies to the point your reading fanfictions of ur favorite ships till u fall asleep and spending all ur time on social media eating up content AND making content about them ??????

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this is homophobic 🙄

episode 8 said: angst no happy ending