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I just posted my newest song "Don't Talk To Me"

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I'm excited to announce that I have a YouTube channel. I'm finally putting my lyrics to good use and creating music. Please repost, give love and support. I try to add a new song every few weeks. I have 9 out now. I'm trying to grow my fanbase.

I also have a twitter/x account if you want to follow me there, too:

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Right Next To Me

This is a song I wrote on 7/13/2011. It's inspired by my beloved cat Nefee who passed away on this date from kidney failure. Sadly, I was on vacation when he had passed and when I returned, the news was broken to me. R.I.P. Nefee <3

it gets hard to breathe,  when I feel this dam breaking deep within inside of me.  (I can't hold my composure anymore) where I walk, I see a memory of you, where you used to sleep and where you'd come running to me... (I can't hold my composure anymore) Chorus: I cry for you, and what you used to be. I wish you were here, right next to me. it's hard to sleep at night, knowing you'll never be, where you were always seen, right next to me.* looking through photos, re-living the past, sitting in our favorite chair,  or cuddled under the blanket. (I can't hold my composure anymore) you'd cry for me at night, and crawl into my bed. I'd run my fingers through your hair and kiss you on your head. I gave you nicknames, and tell you that you were my boy, that you were my everything, that you were my world.  (I can't hold my composure anymore) Chorus: I cry for you, and what you used to be. I wish you were here, right next to me. it's hard to sleep at night, knowing you'll never be, where you were always seen, right next to me.* I cry for you, and what you used to be. I wish you were here... I wish you were here.. I wish you were here...** where I walk,  I see a memory of you. where you used to play, and where you'd be waiting for me... where I walk, I see a memory of you, where you used to sleep and where you'd come running to me... (I can't hold my composure anymore) Chorus: I cry for you, and what you used to be. I wish you were here, right next to me. it's hard to sleep at night, knowing you'll never be, where you were always seen, right next to me.* I cry for you, and what you used to be. I wish you were here... I wish you were here.. I wish you were here...** right next to me.

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How Will I?

This is a song I wrote on 2/17/2014 about being scared to talk to someone about 'defining the relationship'. Are you more than just friends? It's scary to ask because you don't want to lose that person.

I torture myself with questions but my lips never open. I play out the possibilities but I don't move from where I am.  I choke back the words but I know I should speak. I avoid looking at you but I know I have to see... Chorus: I'm scared that you may go, so with this lump in my throat, I try to find courage within me. I'm scared that you may go, but without ever asking, how will I, how will I, how will I ever know?* You always like to talk but never bring it up. You make a move but don't seem to want to stop. You act like we're more but I'm seeing hesitation. You hide something but I'm getting no explanation... Chorus: I'm scared that I may be hurt, so with this lump in my throat, I try to find courage within me. I'm scared that I may be hurt, but without ever asking, how will I, how will I, how will I ever know?* One of us isn't making the first move. One of us isn't going to cave. We're stubborn, or maybe it's that we're afraid? I choke back the words but I know I should speak... Chorus: I'm scared that you may go, so with this lump in my throat, I try to find courage within me. I'm scared that you may go, but without ever asking, how will I, how will I, how will I, how will I, how will I, how will I ever know?

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Brick By Brick

This is a song I wrote on 3/11/2014... about someone who you let in and they ended up hurting you. You brought down your walls and got hurt, so now you got to put those walls back up. 

brick by brick, brick by brick, brick by brick. the wall goes up. brick by brick, by brick, by brick, by brick. Guarded. I didn't want to let just anyone in. Damaged. Phased by the pain of previous intrusions. but then you came and brought my walls down. You brought my walls down. You brought my walls down. You stormed and came inside so easily. I was filled with a warmth to have you with me. You left as fast as you entered. Explored my depths then left me to surrender. You became my weakness. So now... The wall goes up, brick by brick. The wall goes up, brick by brick, by brick, by brick, by brick. Scared. I have to get used to not having you. Angered.  Raging by the choices you chose to do. Why'd you have to go and break me down so easily? Why'd you have to go and invade into me? You became my curse. so now... The wall goes up, brick by brick. The wall goes up, brick by brick, by brick, by brick, by brick. I'm a crumbled mess lying on the floor. Gotta repair myself so you can't enter no more. Why'd you have to go and break me down so easily? Why'd you have to go and invade into me? Why'd you have to go? and so... The wall goes up, brick by brick. The wall goes up, brick by brick, brick by brick, brick by brick, by brick, by brick, by brick, by brick, by brick by brick.

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Let Me Hear It

This is a song I wrote on 3/4/2014 about someone expecting from you to know how they feel, but you can't know if they never tell you. They always lie about it or fake what they're feeling, so you're asking for honesty and forwardness.

you take me as some kind of mind reader. Like I'm supposed to know how you feel? your emotions plastered  into a stare. you talk like your fine, but is this real? pre-chorus: how can I know when you always fake it, or you never chose to talk? Chorus: I'm tired of the guessing games, can't you be straight? I'm walking a thin line of trying to be patient. come on, come on let me hear it now. go ahead, go ahead and let me on down. I'm prepared for the worse, so give it a try.  No need to hold your tongue, or twist into lies.  let me hear it now.* you take me as some kind of instigator. Like I'm supposed to know what is right?  your always playing as an actor. you act like your guarded, but then want to fight? pre-chorus: how can I know when you always fake it, or you never chose to talk? Chorus: I'm tired of the mind games, can't you be forward? I'm walking a thin line of being tortured. come on, come on let me hear it now. go ahead, go ahead and let me on down. I'm prepared for the worse, so give it a try.  No need to hold your tongue, or twist into lies.  let me hear it now.* I'm no mind reader or a psychic. I'm no saint and I can't fake it.  I'm far from perfect but I won't lie. Just be honest with me and look me in the eye... how am I supposed to know how you feel? how am I supposed to know that this is real? (come on, come on) how am I supposed to know if you don't speak? how am I supposed to know if you act fake? (go ahead, go ahead) how am I supposed to know if you don't try? how am i supposed to know if you feed me lies? let me hear it now.

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Crash and Burn

This is a song I wrote on February 1st, 2011. I revised some parts as I went over it. It's about bottling emotions. Struggles with depression. You go through phases where you want to cry out and you just feel like you're going to break down.

I'm not as strong as you think I am.

you ever feel like you're screaming,  but not a word can be heard?  you're exhausting yourself with the pain  and you can no longer hide your hurt?  please hear me...  I dunno how much longer I can hold on. please help me... I dunno how much longer I can stay strong. Chorus: I feel like I'm tinkering on the edge.  I feel like I'm speeding towards the end. I feel like I'm going to crash and burn, crash and burn.  I feel like I'm balancing on a rope. I feel like I'm choking on all my words. it's not gonna be long, it's not gonna be long 'til I crash and burn.* where oh where am I going to now? where oh where can I be found? I'm wandering, hopeless, confused and lost. I feel like a space case, a lifeless shell with no cause. can you hear me? I dunno how much longer I can hold on. can you hear me? I dunno how much longer I can stay strong. Chorus: I feel like I'm tinkering on the edge.  I feel like I'm speeding towards the end. I feel like I'm going to crash and burn, crash and burn.  I feel like I'm balancing on a rope. I feel like I'm choking on all my words. it's not gonna be long, it's not gonna be long 'til I crash and burn.* I'm not as strong as you think I am.  I'm losing my grip, I'm slipping. I can't hold on... I can't hold on... I CAN'T HOLD ON... I CAN'T HOLD ON... I can't stay strong... I can't stay strong... I CAN'T STAY STRONG... I CAN'T STAY STRONG... Chorus: I feel like I'm tinkering on the edge.  I feel like I'm speeding towards the end. I feel like I'm going to crash and burn, crash and burn.  I feel like I'm balancing on a rope. I feel like I'm choking on all my words. it's not gonna be long, it's not gonna be long 'til I crash and burn 'til I crash and burn 'til I crash and burn*

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I Don't Care

This is a song I wrote on September 21st, 2011, inspired by a break-up. My ex was bombarding me with texts, insulting me and saying how I never loved him and never cared. So I used his hate as inspiration to have this sarcastic tone "Damn me for making you fall in love me."

Chorus: I'll make you regret.  I'll give you something you'll never forget.  'cuz I'm a cold-hearted bitch, and I just don't care.  I'll throw away your heart  'cuz life just ain't fair.  I don't care (x2)* you gave me everything and catered to my every need.  you kept me happy and kept me pretty pleased.  once I had your heart, I knew you were all mine. I could say all the right words at every right time.  faking it all was so easy.  I could make you feel bad and make you bend for me. bend for me (x2) wrapped around my finger, I drained you of all you got.  once I had enough, to the curb, left to rot. left to rot (x2) Chorus: I'll make you regret.  I'll give you something you'll never forget.  'cuz I'm a cold-hearted bitch, and I just don't care.  I'll throw away your heart  'cuz life just ain't fair.  I don't care (x2)* being honest never really got me far. I told the truth, yet somehow, I end up breaking your heart.  (I break your heart) when you show signs of weakness, I pick and pull. I open up all your words and then, destroy your world.  (I end your world) *'cuz I'm a cold-hearted bitch, and I just don't care.  I'll throw away your heart  'cuz life just ain't fair.  I don't care (x2) I'll make you regret.  I'll give you something you'll never forget.  'cuz I'm a cold-hearted bitch, and I just don't care.  I'll throw away your heart  'cuz life just ain't fair.  I don't care (x2)* damn me for making you fall in love with me.  how could I do that to you?  damn me for being so perfect in your eyes.  how could I be so cruel? how could I be-- *sound of record scratching* 'cuz I'm a cold-hearted bitch, and I just don't care.  I don't care (x4) I'll make you regret. (I don't care) I'll give you something you'll never forget. (I don't care) 'cuz I'm a cold-hearted bitch,  and I just don't care.  I'll throw away your heart  'cuz life just ain't fair.  I don't care (x5)

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Everlasting Longing

This is a song I wrote on November 11th 2011 about having a secret hidden inside you; eating away at you.

the light fades into the darkness, where my secrets  are kept. I close my eyes, I hold my breath, and let it build in my chest. behind my lips, they're safe? I won't whisper a word?

behind my eyes, in my head, safe from the world.  the rattling of my heart, the pumping of my veins, and all I ever feel, is the everlasting longing.  Chorus: the fire goes out but I still feel the heat. there's the sparks, there's the breeze. trying to breath life... into me... into me... (give life to my secrets) (give life to my secrets).* the light grows dim, the air is cold, where my secrets are known. I clutch my hands, I try to speak, and I feel the walls begin to break. behind my lips, they're safe? I won't whisper a word? behind my heart, in my mind, safe from anyone.  (safe from the world) Chorus: I just want to  say a word. just set it all free. throw it away, into the breeze.  the fire goes out but I still feel the heat. there's the sparks, there's the breeze. trying to breath life... into me... into me... (give life to my secrets) (give life to my secrets).*

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Forgive Me

This is a song I wrote on December 5th, 2011 about screwing up a relationship with someone and trying to fix it and ask for forgiveness.

there was something about you that I couldn't help but like. your charming laugh, your heart, your smile. I found myself wanting to know you... there were times when it came close, we almost crossed that line. we were almost touching... (x3) you poured out your heart, and I, poured out mine. I told you my secrets and told you my life. it was easy opening up to you. then I began to think of you... then I began to miss you... Chorus: then it was gone! I messed up beyond belief and now, a part of me dies when you can't even look at me. you've grown so cold, and I can't blame you for that... I wish I could take it all back (take it all back) I want it all back* now it's to the point where you don't want to see me and it kills me inside that I can't be by your side. you're giving off a different vibe. I regret my mistakes I've cried enough I've apologized and I wanna make up. Chorus: I messed up beyond belief and now, a part of me dies when you can't even look at me. you've grown so cold, and I can't blame you for that... I wish I could take it all back (take it all back) I want it all back* we used to be so close, some might say I've fallen for you, but circumstances got in the way... and now that loves turned cruel. I admire you. I respect you. There's nothing in this world that I wouldn't do. I'd take a bullet for you. I'd lie for you. just take away this pain and please look at me. talk to me. give me your forgiveness and accept my apology. I'm sorry. I know I've fucked up but we're all human and we make mistakes... I messed up beyond belief (please oh please, forgive me) I messed up beyond belief (please oh please, forgive me) I messed up beyond belief (please oh please, forgive me) forgive me... (x10)

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Bad, Bad Girl

This is a song I wrote on December 18th, 2011. It's kind of self explanatory. It's about being 'bad' and living to please. 

you can be my bad boy and I can be your bad girl. I can make your palms sweat and I can take you around the world. I can make your heart race and I can make your heart bleed. I can make you want me and I can bring you to your hands and knees. you know you wanna (uh uh uh uh) do, do whatcha you wanna (uh uh uh uh) Chorus: come on baby, let's get crazy. there's nothing that is holding us back.  come on baby, let's get crazy. there's nothing that is keeping me back. no chains, no bonds. no control. let's get wild. I'll rock your world.  I can be everything you want me to be.  come on baby, let me be your girl.  I can be your bad, bad girl. I can be your bad, bad girl.* you can be my bad boy, and I can be your bad girl. I can make you give in, and I can love you til the end.  I can light your fire. I can make you sweat. I can get you going. I can make you pant.  I can be naughty. I can be a tease. I can drive you crazy. I can make you plead. I got a few tricks up my sleeve. Chorus: come on baby, let's get crazy. there's nothing that is holding us back.  come on baby, let's get crazy. there's nothing that is keeping me back. no chains, no bonds. no control. let's get wild. I'll rock your world.  I can be everything you want me to be.  come on baby, let me be your girl.  I can be your bad, bad girl. I can be your bad, bad girl.* you know you wanna (uh uh uh uh) do, do whatcha you wanna (uh uh uh uh) you know you wanna (uh uh uh uh) do, do whatcha you wanna (uh uh uh uh) I can be your world. I can be your rock. I can be your saint. I can be your star. I can be your muse. I can be your heart. I can be your fuse. I can be your spark.  I can be anything you want me to be. I can be anything you want me to be.  I can be anything you want me to be! I can be anything you want me to be! I can be your bad, bad girl. I can be your bad, bad girl. I can be your bad, bad girl. I can be your bad, bad girl.

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Compared To You

This is a song I wrote on April 4th, 2012. It's about having feelings for someone who won't give you the time of day. They may use you, which hurts, but you can't stop your feelings and keep going back for more.

you look down your nose to me, brush me off; don't give me a second thought. compared to you, I must not be worth your time.  compared to you, I'm just a number in your line. how many more excuses can you feed me from your bag of tricks? before I can realize...? before I can take the hint...? you keep hurting me, yet I come back for more.  I guess I'll never learn what you're worth loving for.  you keep hurting me over and over, yet I want your approval. why do you matter so much? why do I keep coming back to you? what is it that you have? what is it that you do? you look down your nose to me, brush me off; don't give me a second thought. compared to you, I must be a waste of space. compared to you, I'm something that can be replaced. I'm something that can be erased. compared to you, I must not be worth seeing, compared to you, I'm not worthy of being. I'm not worthy of loving... you keep hurting me, yet I come back for more.  I guess I'll never learn what you're worth loving for (what you're worth loving for) why do you matter so much? why do I keep coming back to you? what is it that you have? what is it that you do? I guess I'll never learn what you're worth loving for (what you're worth loving for) I guess I'll never learn what you're worth loving for (what you're worth loving for)

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Words (Can Break My Heart)

This is a song I wrote on April 4th, 2012. It's a song about being in love with someone (who may not know you're in love with them) and how something they say can either brighten or destroy your day. They hold the power of your emotion with their words.

words can sting, words can hurt, they can't break my bones but they can break my heart.  they can break my heart. you leave lasting impressions,  with everything that you say. don't you see I hang on your every word? you leave lasting impressions, of thoughts that linger.  I play it over and over in my head, remembering all of which you said. re-thinking, contemplating, exaggerating, and over-iimagining  don't you see I hang on your every word? Chorus: do you think twice, before you speak? do you even realize, how much those words mean to me? words can sting, words can hurt, they can't break my bones but they can break my heart.  they can break my heart. (they break my heart)* you leave lasting impressions, that causes my thoughts to stir. you leave lasting impressions, that can tear down my world. I ask that you think, before you go to speak. I ask that you see, how much your words mean to me... (they mean the world to me) Chorus: do you think twice, before you speak? do you even realize, how much those words mean to me? words can sting, words can hurt, they can't break my bones but they can break my heart.  they can break my heart. (they break my heart) don't you see I hang on your every word? they can break my heart. (they break my heart) don't you see I hang on your every word? they can break my heart. (they break my heart)

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Revenge

This is a song I finished writing on 2/11/2014 about someone you know is hurt by their significant other and they want to use you as pay back. They were cheated on and they think that cheating on them will make it right, but little do they know, it will make it worse. This is saying "No" to helping a ruin a relationship further.

You told me she hurt you, and though that isn’t fine. baby, you should know by now, that two wrongs don’t make a right. It can’t undo what’s been done, and the pain will still be there. It can’t take back the mistakes she’s made, and it won't be repaired. But using me to do your deed, won’t set things right. Chorus: I don’t want to be your revenge! I don’t want to be your excuse for what you’ve gone and done.  I’m not your scape goat, or your alibi. I’m not your shortcut or your lie.  I don’t want to be your revenge.* your actions won't heal your wounds, and it can't erase the past. baby, you should know by now, that humans have feelings. yes, she's gone and hurt you, and that knowledge will always stay. It can't replace the history, ontop of another mistake. don't be bringing me into the middle of your war. don't be treating me like I'm some kind of savior.  I can't fix the mistakes, of what she has done. I'm not going to aide and be the other woman. Chorus: I don’t want to be your revenge! I don’t want to be your excuse for what you’ve gone and done.  I’m not your scape goat, or your alibi. I’m not your shortcut or your lie.  please don't mess with me, and say that it's fine. you can't cover up mistakes with a mountain of lies.* I'm not your reason, I'm not your truce. I'm not your savior for what you've been through. I'm not your scape goat, I'm not your alibi. I'm not your shortcut or your reason to lie. I don't want to be your revenge! I don't want to be your revenge! I don't want to be your revenge! I don't want to be your revenge! two wrongs don't make a right.

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Just Friends

This is a song I finished writing on 2/11/2014. It's about getting romantically involved with someone, only to have them say they don't want to be intimate with you anymore and just want to be friends. The friendship is never the same afterwards because you're attached and want more...

Don’t act like we’re okay, just being friends. Don’t act like that we, never meant anything.  Don’t act like we’re okay, just being friends. Don’t act like that we, never ever happened.  Don’t try to twist your words, ‘cuz you know what you said. And instead of talking to me, you’re killing me with silence instead. You told me you loved me, then made your words history. It’s like it never happened, like it was all just a dream.  Your acting kills me more, every single time. You play the part so perfectly, as you roll out the lies. I try to be what you need, in hopes we could be more. I opened up, gave you trust, and now there is no more.  Your silence answers everything, there’s no need to try. You don’t need to find the words, when I read the answers in your eyes. Chorus: Don’t act like we’re okay, just being friends. Don’t act like that we, never meant anything. Don’t act like we’re okay, just being friends. Don’t act like that we, never ever happened. * It can never be fine again between us. When the history kills us.  You expect it to go back to normal when you made me fall in love? You led me on, you had your fun.  The world’s gone to dust. I can’t look you in the eyes anymore, so how can it go back to normal? how can it go back to normal? Chorus: Don’t act like we’re okay, just being friends. Don’t act like that we, never meant anything. Don’t act like we’re okay, just being friends. Don’t act like that we, never ever happened. * Don’t act like we’re okay just being friends.  Don’t act like… I never happened.

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Spell

This is a song I've been working on for awhile and finished on 2/11/2014. It's about being someone's 'other woman' and cheating in relationships. 

I don't want to have to add your name, to my ever growing list.  My brain says for us to stop, but my body doesn't seize. How can I put to words, the command to make you stop? When you cause my heart to race and my body fiend for lust? I damn you for the spell, that you have me under.  You've gone and corrupted me, and changed me from an angel. I was a 'one-guy' kind of girl, who had my heart set on one. But you showed me the dark side, of where to find the fun.  Chorus: I wish I could go back in time, and put an end to the advances. I'd stop your eyes from wandering, and to us exchanging glances. I'd tell you where to screw, and proudly walk away.  Leave my heart in full, before it went astray. how can you be so sneaky? don't the guilt eat at you? I hope someday you learn to feel the torment you put me through.* You went to look, then you had to touch.  For you, looking was a sport but just not enough. You had to entice, then reel me in. I find myself being foolish, and allowing it to happen. Already with a girl to call your own, wasn't enough.  You had to have me on the side, like dessert before your lunch.  Why do you want me? Why do you chase?  You should have just left me alone, instead of making this mistake. Chorus: I wish I could go back in time, and put an end to the advances. I'd stop your eyes from wandering, and to us exchanging glances. I'd tell you where to screw, and proudly walk away.  Leave my heart in full, before it went astray. how can you be so sneaky? don't the guilt eat at you? I hope someday you learn to feel the torment you put me through.* I damn you for the spell, that you have me under.  You've gone and corrupted me, and changed me from an angel. You said the right words, and gave in to my sins.  Showed me how to be wild, and became my addiction. You're trouble that I don't know how to get out of. Oh You're trouble that I don't know how to get out of.

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Ramblings Of A Broken Heart

This is a song, originally written on June 19th 2012, that I wrote about having a broken heart and being stuck in that rut where you can't stop thinking about the person who broke your heart.

here you are, again, in my thoughts. it seems no matter what I do, you, can't be shaken off. here we are, so we meet again. it seems no matter what I do, this torture won't seem to end.  is there a remedy for getting over you? looking at your face, it's a pain I just cannot bare. my mind is flooded with memories, and I can't hold back the tears. Chorus: I hear our song and I feel sick to my stomach. I can't stand to hear those words. you can't be tuned out, it's like you're haunting me. the thoughts are constant, and there's no distancing. these are the ramblings of a broken heart. these are the ramblings of a broken heart.* you went in, knowing exactly what I wanted. not thinking of it, you went and took my love for granted. you're the reason to blame for this damage to my heart. I script out what I'll say to you next, but my tongue always gets tied in a knot. is there anything I can do, for getting over you? I don't want you any longer in my thoughts... Chorus: I hear our song and I feel sick to my stomach. I can't stand to hear those words. you can't be tuned out, it's like you're haunting me. the thoughts are constant, and there's no distancing. these are the ramblings of a broken heart. these are the ramblings of a broken heart.* I can't escape, and I have hope that it will all work out. but while the sight of you makes me sick, seeing you, it's you I miss. so here you are, yet again, predicting every move, playing out the ending. give me anything, to make this end. take it away.  give me anything, to make this end. take it away. Chorus: I hear our song and I feel sick to my stomach. I can't stand to hear those words. you can't be tuned out, it's like you're haunting me. the thoughts are constant, and there's no distancing. these are the ramblings of a broken heart. these are the ramblings of a broken heart. these are the ramblings of a broken heart. take it away.  these are the ramblings of a broken heart. take it away. these are the ramblings of a broken heart. take it away.