rubyred1187

[rubyred1187]

Who I thought I would be at 19 vs me at 19

Who I thought I would be:

scent: roses after it rains, floral, dirt, moist

long red nails

black tights, cozy sweaters and turtlenecks, skirts, dark colours, black, red, emerald, minimal gold jewelry

studying history

soft spoken, reserved, intellectual

multi-lingual

collecting old books

dark academia, henry winter vibes

always writing

classical literature tucked under arm at all times

focusing on perfect penmanship

learning piano

ballet lessons

be apart of a mysterious and academic friend group

appreciation for old money

writing a serious novel

Who I am:

scent: vanilla, jasmine, sticky dates and citrus

short red nails

worn jeans, colourful T-shirts, boots and sandals, sun dresses, floral maxi-skirts, chunky gold jewelry, bangles, assorted jewelry and rings on every finger

studying history

apprenticeship in acupuncture and herbal medicine

energetic, confident, thoughtful

studying multiple languages

collecting guitar picks and rocks

judg poovy vibes

text to speech

reading everything

scribbling notes on any available surface

hot yoga

having met my best friends that are honest and loving and are not at all in academia

disgust for old money and elitism

[rubyred1187]

Notesapp Poetry

Mutual breakup:

Sometimes I hate myself

And I hate you

For leaving me

How I left

you

Young Love:

young and undeniable

I cut open my chest

you did not look away

so I gave you

my blessing

and I looked at you with adoring eyes

peeling back your skin

you furrow your brow

your voice goes soft

you are unmoored before me

I feel like I’ve ruined you

[rubyred1187]

Recently went through a break up and heres some of the notes app poetry I’ve written.

Sonnet #1:

He is, to me, like a dream

I try to remember in the morning

Bowing in and out of consciousness

Sonnet #2:

I am in memory with you and I remember being embarrassed

And thinking you were beautiful

Sonnet #3:

I imagine him here

Filling the space

And i miss him so much right now

[rubyred1187]

A collection of thoughts from my school notebook (October 2022)

- I love the month of October, the insinuation of something supernatural or the promise of warmth against the coming cold.

- My nails are growing long.

- I want to be in a video game. And my impression would evaporate from their memory.

- Her persona is lovely and in intoxicating. So controlled.

- I finished my book.

- Fall is altogether too brief

- upon finding a naked branch, my heart breaks

- I love Halloween

- My nails broke, and now they are cut like uneven blades of grass

- leaves haunt the earth

- I could fall in love with him, maybe in another life

[rubyred1187]

Love Song, Dorothy Parker

[ Text ID: My love runs by like a day in June, ]

[rubyred1187]

russian classics aesthetic

Brothers Karamazov: orthodox monasteries, deep woods, starry nights, the sound of paper being torn, dimly lit rooms, withered roses, an unfinished letter, piles of books, the sound of shattering glass, ticking of clocks in a silent house, heavy wooden furniture, the air before a storm, the smell of earth, a crowd of people dressed in black, distant murmurs, emptied streets, the fear of walking alone in dusk

Crime and Punishment: coldness of the skin against a blade, slender pale fingers and slightly shaking hands, a red stain blooming on white fabric, lonely steps in a corridor, the slow dripping of water, looking out of the window into the thickening darkness, a single dying candle on the table, listening to one’s breath and counting heartbeats, too many stairs, the desire to be invisible, a subtle memory of kind word

The Idiot: classical statues, wealth covered with dust, a dark house tainted with inherited madness, an unsettling feeling, long walks in a park, useless chatter, a silken ribbon forgotten on a bench, a melancholic face, an unexpected spring rain, the joy of reading one’s favorite book, the clarity of mind after fully perceiving the world around, looking at cloudless sky  

Anna Karenina: fields of crops, flowers brought from an early morning walk, the wind caressing a girl’s hair, a bowl of fruit, the smell of ripe pears, the clatter of a spoon against porcelain when stirring tea, children’s laughter coming from the garden, soft sunlight and white curtains, the sensation of velvet against skin, pearls from a ripped necklace spilling on marble floor, a sudden silence in a room full of people

War and Peace: a glass of wine, the brightness of  a crystal chandelier, white lace, a raging snow storm, the sound of a door being gently closed, the moment of holding one’s breath before walking in a ball room, indulging in looking at a beautiful earring against light, the sound of a saber being drawn, closing one’s eyes for a moment while dancing, the sweet smell of strawberries, a pair of gloves left on an armchair, light scent of powder

The Master and Margarita: the chaos of a lively city, ambient jazz in expensive restaurants, jumping on a moving tram, the sight of Moscow from the roof of a house, yellow flowers in a vase, leaning out of the window, shelves stacked with books, a small tin box with old photographs, strange shapes in the night sky, laughing in the middle of the night on a balcony, colorful posters for a surreptitious magician’s show floating in the wind

Eugene Onegin: a lonely mansion, reading a book in the parlor, faint piano melody lingering in falling silence, long evenings, passing seasons, discussing french novels of the moment, unspoken thoughts, leaning against the door frame, quickly averted glance, eating a peach absent-minded, bright mornings, footprints in snow, a loud gun-shot terrifying a flock of birds nearby   

A Hero of Our Time: byronic boredom, getting up late in the afternoon, the hidden unspeakable sadness of existence, shakespeare’s tragedy opened next to untouched breakfast, cigarette smoke, polished boots, walking with one’s coat wide open letting the night chill break through to the bone, carved wooden chair, fading warmth of the ashes late in the evening, the thought of farewell  

Fathers and Sons: birch groves, morning mist, moss covered stones near a  moor, scientific books, white roses, cheap champagne, shabby pocket-watch, light-hearted irony, a maladroit cello sonata, freshly mowed grass, leaving thoughts come and go, a slow yawn, picturesque plates and bowls filled with traditional dishes, drinking tea on the porch, longing for the future   

Doctor Zhivago: a strange feeling of loss, writing poems in a diary, traveling by train, the hesitation before touching someone’s hand, the gaze of one lost in thought, the warmth of cinnamon, a scarf brightly embellished with flowers, a glass of water, two people listening each on the other side of the door, a threadbare jacket, the tempting void, the evanescent serenity of yesterday  

Dead Souls: horses in a merry gallop, delicious smells mingled, grotesque and bizarre tragedy, luxurious attire cheap soul, masks, a perfumed love letter, the triumph of sarcasm, an unattached wheel rolling down a dusty road, the atmosphere of commedia dell’ arte, puzzling speeches, a baffling caricature drawn on a handkerchief   

Cherry Orchard: a lone chair in an empty room, falling blossoms, old samovar, the unsettling need for change, a mirror reflecting full moon, the disappointment of a glossy object turning worthless after second glance, a piano out of tune      

[rubyred1187]

Read like Julian Morrow's students

Untimely Meditations by Friedrich Nietzsche, Epigraph

Republic, Book II by Plato, Epigraph

Tom Swift by Victor Appleton,

Paradise Lost by John Milton

Goodbye, Columbus by Philip Roth

The New Testament

Agamemnon by Aeschylus

Oresteia by Aeschylus

Inferno by Dante

Poetics by Aristotle

The Iliad by Homer

The Bacchae by Euripides

Parmenides by Plato

The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Ivanhoe by Sir Walter Scott

Rover Boys by Edward Stratemeyer

Journey from Chester to London by Thomas Pennant

The Club History of London by ?

The Pirates of Penzance by W.S. Gilbert

Bobbsey Twins by Laura Lee Hope

Marino Faliero by Lord Byron

The Waste Land by T.S. Eliot

Sherlock Homes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert

Mémoires by Duc de Saint-Simon

Vanity Fair by William Makepeace Thackeray

Othello by Shakespeare

The World Book Encyclopedia

Men of Thought and Deed by E. Tipton Chatsford

Invisible Man by H.G. Wells

Peter Pan, or The Boy Who Wouldn’t Grow Up by J. M. Barrie

The Divine Comedy by Dante

Superman Comics

The Upanishads

Perry Mason Novels by Erle Stanley Gardner

With Rue my Heart is Laden by A.E. Housman

Lycidas by John Milton

The Charge of the Light Brigade by Alfred Lord Tennyson

In Flanders Fields by John McCrae

Corpus of Mycenaean Inscriptions from Knossos

Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll

The Malcontent by John Marston

The White Devil by John Webster

The Broken Heart by John Ford, epilogue epigraph

Doctor Faustus by Christopher Marlowe

The Revenger’s Tragedy by Cyril Tourneur

Our Mutual Friend by Charles Dickens

Dido, Henry Fuseli - 1781

[rubyred1187]

Academic wins can look like:

Getting an A on your test

Organizing a study group

Studying daily for an hour or two

Having perfect attendance

Getting that grant/scholarship

Getting ahead in all your classes

Academic wins can also look like:

Actually being able to focus in class for once

Getting enough sleep and food

Fighting through your depression and finishing a single assignment

Turning in a paper a little late

Taking a mental health day

Getting a C on a test you thought you failed

Academic wins are personal. They're different for everyone and depend on you, your goals, your mental and physical health, and your overall well-being. For someone working full time, getting that C and showing up to class once a week is a win and something they should be proud of! For someone who has everything financially covered and can devote plenty of time, getting the deans list should be something they rightfully should brag about! Achievements are Achievements regardless. Don't let anyone take your wins from you

[rubyred1187]

My English teacher reads a poem at the start of every class and it’s the best part of my day <3

[rubyred1187]

The Ultimate Dark Academia Book Recommendation Guide Ever

The title of this post is clickbait. I, unfortunately, have not read every book ever. Not all of these books are particularly “dark” either. However, these are my recommendations for your dark academia fix. The quality of each of these books varies. I have limited this list to books that are directly linked to the world of academia and/or which have a vaguely academic setting.

Dark Academia staples:

The Secret History by Donna Tartt

If We Were Villains by M.L. Rio

Dead Poets Society by Nancy H. Kleinbaum

Vita Nostra by Maryna Dyachenko

Dark academia litfic or contemporary:

Bunny by Mona Awad

The Idiot by Elif Batuman

These Violent Delights by Micah Nemerever

White Ivy by Susie Yang

The Cloisters by Katy Hays

Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro

The Lake of Dead Languages by Carol Goodman

A Separate Peace by John Knowles

Black Chalk by Christopher J. Yates

Attribution by Linda Moore

Dark academia thrillers or horror:

In My Dreams I Hold a Knife by Ashley Winstead

The Maidens by Alex Michaelides

Ghosts of Harvard by Francesca Serritella

Catherine House by Elisabeth Thomas

Plain Bad Heroines by Emily M. Danforth

They Never Learn by Layne Fargo

The It Girl by Ruth Ware

Never Saw Me Coming by Vera Kurian

Dark academia fantasy/sci-fi:

Babel: An Arcane History by R.F. Kuang

The Atlas Six by Olivie Blake

Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo

A Lesson in Vengeance by Victoria Lee

The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern

Vicious by V.E. Schwab

A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness

The Betrayals by Bridget Collins

Dark academia romance:

Gothikana by RuNyx

Alone With You in the Ether by Olivie Blake

Dark academia YA or MG:

Truly Devious by Maureen Johnson

A Deadly Education by Naomi Novik

Ace of Spades by Faridah Àbíké-Íyímídé

The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater

Legendborn by Tracy Deonn

Crave by Tracy Wolff

Wilder Girls by Rory Power

The Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling

Dark academia miscellaneous:

My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell

Disorientation by Elaine Hsieh Chou

Alphabet of Thorn by Patricia A. McKillip

[rubyred1187]

Henricus Isaac was a Netherlandish Renaissance composer who worked in many courts of Europe during the late 15th and early 16th centuries.  He lived in Florence during the 1480s and was employed as a singer for Santa Maria del Fiore and then Santissima Annunziata in the 1490s, and may have worked closely with Lorenzo de’ Medici.  He performed at the coronation Pope Alexander VI (Rodrigo Borgia), and eventually sang for the Hapsburgs in Austria, notably Holy Roman Emperor Maximilian I.

Listen Here

[rubyred1187]

In the opening epigraphs of The Secret History, Tartt utilizes a quote from Friedrich Nietzsche: “1. A young man cannot possibly know what Greeks and Romans are; 2. He does not know whether he is suited for finding out about them.” Due to the gap in time between the modern day and antiquity, a person born now does not have the resources to truly know what life was like during that time. There is a mystery and allure to this ancient world. Though as evidenced by the progression of the novel, it is unknown if the modern mind is able to be a part of that world.

Tartt follows this with a quote from Plato's Republic II which reminds the reader that the book is in fact a piece of fiction though that does not take away from the verity of its lessons. “Come then, let us pass a leisure jour in storytelling and our story shall be the education of our heroes.”

[rubyred1187]

a few websites i recommend:

you won't walk alone is a platform that is created with the purpose of being in solidarity with the women who have been undergoing the pressure of wearing a headscarf in any part of their lives by means of acknowledging and sharing their stories of struggle.

aeon is a digital magazine with wonderful quality essays on a variety of subjects all for free. i have also subscribed to their newsletter.

on being is a radio show and podcast created by Krista Tippett where they discuss poetry, ideas and wisdom from different parts of the world.

brain pickings is a web archive made by Maria Popova - "it is a record of my own becoming as a person — intellectually, creatively, spiritually, poetically — drawn from my extended marginalia on the search for meaning across literature, science, art, philosophy, and the various other tentacles of human thought and feeling."

we present has articles about different art forms (architecture, illustration, film, street art, music, photography and more), but also about gaming, fashion, social topics and learning. the articles are interesting, qualitatively written and unique.

for getting better with writing in english: write and improve (gives you topics to write about and corrects your mistakes as well as tells you your level of english knowledge)

a few youtubers i highly recommend: Nathaniel Drew (his website, and i suggest subscribing to the newsletter!), Robin C. Waldun (who also has a website). some more :)) : clavero (a spanish filmmaker, been watching him since 2016, funnily enough i found him on misical.ly), cathy hay (for historical fashion, but she also has such wonderful wisdom aah she's so lovely), kraig adams (for some relaxing hiking videos but also for hiking ideas), exurb1a and exurb2a (unique look on the world and some lovely philosophy), let's talk religion (in depth, well-explained videos on various religions and specific aspects of those religions), pursuit of wonder (a heaven for people like me who live in constant existential crisis. but fr - i can't even count how many times those videos have changed my perspective), damon dominique (wonderful and unique content where you can learn but also be entertained. love the guy.), george thompson (for people who are interested in daoism), savannah brown (she is a writer, i have her poetry book sweetdark (highly recommend btw), but her video essays are masterpieces) aaand i think that's it for now :)

have fun on the internet! you're the bee's knees and i hope you have a wonderful day.

(also feel free to reblog with more resources you wish more people knew about)

[rubyred1187]

Latin Phrases Worth Knowing

ad astra per aspera - to the stars through difficulties

alis volat propriis - he flies by his own wings

aut insanity homo, aut versus facit - the fellow is either mad or he is composing verses

amantium irae amoris intergratio est - the quarrels of lovers are the renewal of love

ars longa, vita brevis - art is long, life is short

dum spiro aperitif - while I breathe, I hope

ense petit placidam sub libertate quietem - with the sword, she seeks peace under liberty

exigo a me non ut optimus par sim sed ut malis melior - I require myself not to be equal to the best, but to be better than the bad

experiential docet - experience teaches

helluo librorum - a glutton for books (bookworm)

in libras libertas - in books, freedom

littera scripta manet - the written letter lasts

mens regnum bona possidet - an honest heart is a kingdom in itself

mirabile dictu - wonderful to say

nullus est liber tam malus ut non aliqua parte prosit - there is no book so bad that it is not profitable in some part

omnia iam fient quae posse negabam - everything which I used to say could not happen, will happen now

poeta nascitur, non fit - the poet is born, not made

qui dedit benificium taceat; narrat qui accepit - let him who has done good deed be silent; let him who has received it tell it

saepe ne utile quidem est scire quid futurum sit - often, it is not advantageous to know what will be

sedit qui timuit ne non succederet - he who feared he would not succeed sat still

si vis pacem, para bellum - if you want peace, prepare for war

struit insidias lacrimis cum feminia plorat - when a woman weeps, she is setting traps with her tears

sub rosa - under the rose

trahimir omnes laudis studio - we are led on by our eagerness of praise

Ruben latericium invenit, marmoream reliquit - he found the city a city of bricks, he left it a city of marble

ut incepit fidelis sic permanent - as loyal as she began, so she remains

[rubyred1187]

I actually love green and black tea but this person makes some excellent points that they deliver with enthusiasm.

A Small Discourse on Tea

Growing up in a culture which really respects its tea, some of us have strong opinions on what constitutes as tea.

In this essay I will…

Tea originated from southwest China, and from there was spread throughout the world through the help of traders, both from land (through the silk road) and by the sea. 

The Chinese term for tea is cha (茶), and made its way through Central Asia. In modern day, the term developed into “chay” (چای) in Persian and Urdu, shay in Arabic and even chai in Swahili, when the tea leaves made their way into Sub-Saharan Africa. The same term (茶) is pronounced differently by the coastal regions of China, pronouncing it as “te”. The East India company’s tea importation gave European languages “thé” (French), “Tee” (German) and o of course, “tea” (England). 

Source: Tea if by sea, cha if by land: Why the world only has two words for tea

I had never understood, while watching British media, why they added the milk after the tea had been cooked. That’s blasphemy. Here, especially in Karachi (a coastal city of Pakistan, if you did not know), tea is drunk all the time and the default way to cook it is in milk. The milk is added along with cardamom, then loose tea leaves and sugar, and its brought to a boil after which it is sieved and served. The boil brings out flavours of all ingredients. 

The chai even fits in all aesthetics.

See, I would have talked about making tea from tea bags but then I realized, I would have lost it. Loose tea leaves for the win. 

Why would anyone, I mean ANYONE willingly drink black or green tea. It’s horrendous and wakes you up as if Genghis himself arrived to slap you awake. Tea is supposed to be calming and relaxing, energizing you in a motivational way (like the cleanse you feel after watching Studio Ghibli films). The flavour is absolutely wonderful. 

Adding cinnamon (or any other masalas) make for a more tangy-esque tea which is still good but who ever adds pumpkin spice, chocolate, maple syrup or any abomination of an ingredient to tea, I will personally hunt you down and make you a good cup of chai. You all are missing out on this wonderful tradition. And to those who will like to bring a more modern touch to it, DON’T DARE TOUCH CHAI YOU COLONIALIST FREAKS.

I conclude my essay by stating that I aspire to show everyone the wonder that is chai. Thank you.

Do tell me your thoughts.

[rubyred1187]

175+ non-Western literature recommendations to diversify your academia, organized by continent + country

I love world literature, and I’ve been frustrated by the lack of representation of it in literature + academia communities on tumblr, so here are some recommendations. I haven’t read all of these myself yet, but the ones I have are excellent and the ones I haven’t come highly recommended from Goodreads and are on my to-read list! 

With the exception of anthologies of older works, all of these books were written before 2000 (some literally thousands of years earlier), since I’m less familiar with super contemporary literature. Also, I only included each writer once, though many of them have multiple amazing books. I’m sure there are plenty of incredible books I’m missing, so please feel free to add on to this list! And countries that aren’t included absolutely have a lot to offer as well–usually, it was just hard to find books available in English translation (which all of the ones below are.)

List below the cut (it’s my first post with a cut so let’s hope I do it right… and also warning that it’s super long)

Keep reading

[rubyred1187]

Hot Girls don’t Gatekeep (dark academia edition)

How do you improve your vocabulary?

Read! Every time you encounter a word you don’t know, look it up and write it down. Than try to use it in a sentence in the next few days. I found it useful to study Latin and French because a surprising amount of your vocabulary can consist of those languages and still apply to the English language. It adds another dimension to your vocabulary. And don’t be afraid to ask if someone uses a word in conversation you don’t know.

How are you dyslexic but read so much? How can I read faster?

Audiobooks. There are many free audiobooks on YouTube especially if you are looking for classics. With physical books I suggest using a pencil or your to finger to follow the lines and that will help you read faster. You can also draw a line down the page just before the latest word and it will make you read faster because your mind will instinctually fill in the ending word. I wouldn’t recommend this for deliberate reading but you can find an audiobook and put it in 2x speed and follow along with the physical book and you will finish it very quickly. Finally, I would recommend just reading books that interest you and time will fly by.

Best Dark Academia fashion tips?

Red tights. Black turtle neck/black skirt/tights combo. Golden locket (bonus if you can find a vintage one or the Lana Del Rey necklace). Sweaters (Thrifted/Croft & Borrow/Urban Outfitters but ones resold on Depop or Poshmart). Invest in Loafers and a tote bag that you really like. Try to develop your own style using Pinterest and looking at runway shows.

Books that altered my brain chemistry

On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous by Ocean Vuong

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Atonement by Ian McEwan

King Lear by William Shakespeare

The Secret History by Donna Tartt

The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde

Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky

Tenth of December by George Saunders

Pale Fire by Vladimir Nabokov