saltedbirdcat

[saltedbirdcat]

“Jon told me we were going to be making The Wizard Of Oz meets LOTR but what we were really making was the greatest love story that was ever told. That's what we were making. It is about their relationship and [Ariana and Cynthia's] performances inspired me to cut the [OzDust] sequence in a certain way and be really bold and not afraid of silence."

Myron Kerstein on editing Wicked

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Myra Ruiz (Elphaba) and Fabi Bang’s (Glinda) shenanigans backstage.

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Ozian historians on Elphaba and Glinda - They were friends who loved each other dearly, just friends who ruled together, companions, if you will. These two roommates reigned over Oz in a fair and just way, destined to be best friends and nothing more than chums.

*Elphaba and Glinda aggressively making out*

LMAOO no literally like Glinda and Elphaba could literally be making out in public and Ozians will be like “Omg her goodness is kissing The Wicked Witch to cure her of wickedness she’s so good 🥺” like bestie that’s Glindas wife they’ve been married for three years-

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When Elphaba tosses her cape, in her most grandiose moment, the crest of her crescendo, and it billows out backwards ominously and yet somehow in the same manner that Glinda has been frivolously tossing her hair this whole time, the way she showed her. The cape that Glinda gave her. That's lesbianism.

[saltedbirdcat]

movie/musical glinda is a morally complicated woman who ultimately decides she's going to be a good person

book glinda is a sopping wet moldy towel of a woman whose inherent patheticness prevents her from being useful for 95% of the series

billie burke glinda is probably supposed to be the oz stand-in for dorothy's mother (sending dorothy off and helping her when needed but ultimately letting her discover herself on her own) and as such she's a bitch who made a child take a long walk in heels and goes around throwing a ton of shade with a petty little smile (again, obviously a mother figure of sorts)

og lfb glinda is a machiavellian pyscho who conspired to put a child she transed on the throne, is basically said child's grand vizier, convinced the child to cut of oz from the rest of the world, and spends her days lounging in her palace with one hundred of the most beautiful maidens in the fairyland of oz at her beck and call. a genuinely insane overpowered lesbian sleeper agent there is something deeply wrong with this woman

[saltedbirdcat]

glinda is significantly worse than elphaba for like all of the musical and is kinda a fucking idiot sometimes but elphaba actually telling a man "i wish i could be beautiful for you" is the most embarrassing thing in the whole story. she should feel as bad about that as glinda does about getting nessa killed by a house. genuinely shameful. can't be saying shit like that.

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god gives her hardest battles to her cuntiest soldiers

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by the time canon rolls around mira's lovergirl goggles protect her from the worst of it. but zoey wearing crocs w socks still forces her to cycle thru every deep breathing exercise known to man

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I think for a long time Huntr/x would be really proud of never having any of those “idol fainting on stage” incidents because they’re pretty public about how well they’re treated and how good their manager is. They know they’re a rarity in an industry full of abuse and overwork, and they want to try to set an example of better treatment for artists.

But they’re also Hunters, and shit happens. I think at some point one of them might try to perform without being fully healed from a recent hunt.

Rumi’s right in the middle of a solo moment, spotlight on her, singing her heart out, when suddenly she just gets dizzy and the stage lights aren’t helping and she just drops like a wet rag. Mira’s going through some intense choreography, which she loves, and the crowd is eating it up, but a recent injury is being irritated the more she moves and eventually the pain gets so overwhelming she just crumples to the floor. Zoey is in the middle of a rap, and gradually the audience loses the ability to understand her, thinking maybe she’s just going way too fast but eventually realizing she’s getting quieter and becoming unintelligible before she slumps over.

The show would stop IMMEDIATELY. No one is even waiting for crew members. The other two are getting their third member off the stage themselves. There’s chaos backstage. Two of them guarding the injured one, trying not to let anyone see the evidence of their demon hunting without looking suspicious. Gently coaxing them back to consciousness. Taking them home to get their wound looked at again. Any shows within the next few weeks cancelled immediately.

But the worst part would then be how the fans, in a misguided effort to look out for them, dogpile on Bobby for marketing Huntr/x as a well-managed group where the girls are properly fed and get time to rest and are never overworked or exploited, only for one of his idols to faint on stage and “expose him”. Fans start to think he forced the girls to say all those nice things about him. #FreeHuntr/x starts trending. No matter how many times they say “she was just sick, it was nobody’s fault, things happen”, it takes a really long time for it to die down. Bobby takes it like a champ and doesn’t blame the girls at all (why would he?) but they blame themselves for the hit his reputation took.

[saltedbirdcat]

god gives her hardest battles to her cuntiest soldiers

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by the time canon rolls around mira's lovergirl goggles protect her from the worst of it. but zoey wearing crocs w socks still forces her to cycle thru every deep breathing exercise known to man

[saltedbirdcat]

Galinda Upland, worlds fakest idgafer

Always trying to look at Elphaba despite “loathing” her ik what you are-

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perpetually thinking of the part in wicked the novel where they're at lake chorge after pfannee sent a fake letter from galinda to elphaba that she needs her there "for reasons i dare not say," thus humiliating galinda and elphie both. boq and galinda are talking, and when boq is like "if you've been publicly humiliated why don't you leave" and glinda's like "well, elphie says to leave is to admit defeat"

then boq kisses her and it immediately cuts to everyone riding back to shiz in silence

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do you pace around your attic thinking about how elphaba's dying thoughts about glinda "in her gowns, waiting to be good enough to deserve what she gets" are in reference to the fact that she's had elphaba's love from the moment elphaba laid eyes on her (being described as a "bright golden presence") and their first conversation in the dorm room, but she's never really been able to bring herself to reciprocate, at least, not in the way that elphie needs, but no matter what she still has elphaba's love and devotion, and she's just sitting around, waiting for elphaba to come back for her ("hold out my sweet. hold out if you can"), waiting for elphie to think she's good enough to come back for? or do you do literally anything else with your life?

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the difference between movie elphaba and book elphaba is that if movie elphaba saw glinda the good berry cereal at the grocery store she'd stare really longingly at glinda's outline for like five minutes as she feels frustration that glinda's image has been reduced to this and glinda has chosen a life of doing cereal ads to support a fascist regime while also missing her and wishing glinda got on the broom with her and hoping that glinda is happy. then she'd buy one box and bring it back to her camp in the woods and put it on the shelf like some sort of sacred relic. if book elphaba saw glinda the good berry cereal she'd complain about how much she hates the taste of glinda the good berry cereal but steal all the boxes from all the stores in a twenty mile radius and if liir tried to take any of her cereal to, you know, feed himself she'd yell at him

[saltedbirdcat]

~ #24 ~

[saltedbirdcat]

glinda is significantly worse than elphaba for like all of the musical and is kinda a fucking idiot sometimes but elphaba actually telling a man "i wish i could be beautiful for you" is the most embarrassing thing in the whole story. she should feel as bad about that as glinda does about getting nessa killed by a house. genuinely shameful. can't be saying shit like that.

[saltedbirdcat]

cuntrix in my fits + teddybear museum enthusiast rumi goes to build-a-bear (shoutout to @soggystyrofoam and @kuinaminku for floating the idea and @kchzndrvh for enabling the rickroll)

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what other stupid things should the bear be saying?

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The way For Good is essentially Gelphies love theme and you can hear it during their most pivotal scenes (even deleted ones) I’m going to self destruct from all this doomed yuri