serviliacaepionis

[serviliacaepionis]

fuck your bisexual pegging girlboss/malewife wholesome cult. fuck these attempts to 'fix' cishet ships. it's gender horrors OR NOTHING. stop being a COWARD.

[serviliacaepionis]

i’m sorry

[serviliacaepionis]

the mother-son relationship between tiberius and livia is basically every mother-son relationship that still exists on the italian peninsula. please mom iron my underwear even though i’m 40. please cook lasagna for me on sunday. mom my wife is crazy she says i want to kill her children!!! what a lunatic let’s kill her

[serviliacaepionis]

do you think agrippina maior ever slapped tiberius so hard with her knuckles that his cheekbone popped out? let me know 🥰 🥰

[serviliacaepionis]

who knows why the two most competent people in the house of incest happen to be the children of drusus and antonia minor

[serviliacaepionis]

germanicus and claudius vying for the favor of top-tier femme dom agrippina maior while tiberius has a homophobic meltdown in his capri grotto

[serviliacaepionis]

can we please talk more often about cytheris, pallas, narcissus, tiro &ct let’s talk more often about clever liberti. tell me who your favorite libertus is in the tags

[serviliacaepionis]

cytheris is the one who turned brutus and mark antony into lesbians

[serviliacaepionis]

what did brutus and servilia talk about at family dinners when cytheris was there too

[serviliacaepionis]

cicero, be silent. no, caesar didn’t remove my son, marcus junius brutus, from the list of suspected conspirators in the plot against pompey magnus (magnus as what?). no, the night before we most certainly didn’t spend a wild evening together drinking falernian wine and engaging in pegging. my entire gens would have claimed such an affair with pride. adulescentulus carnifex is just another tenant of rome, no different from you.

[serviliacaepionis]

i don’t understand why they always talk about the manic pixie dream girl (clodia pulchra) when here i am, who’s sodomized all of caesar’s dogs, a far tougher job than having some cisalpine gaul write poems for me. anyway, where is my brutus? brutus.

[serviliacaepionis]

if you see cato (not address him as my brother, thank you) in my hortus locked in a cage please don’t feed him in any case