smoldher

[smoldher]

I wish depression were an emergency. I wish someone could take one look at how sick I am and go “oh my god, we need to get you to a hospital!” and then when we get there I get rushed into surgery and the surgeons say “it’s a good thing you brought her here when you did, this is a seriously advanced case” and then they put me under and spend the next ten hours pulling metres of long, sticky black strands of gunk out of my body, throwing it immediately into an incinerator so that it can’t infect anyone else. And then they could stitch me back up and I could rest a few days, and when I leave the hospital everyone can see how much better I am and they congratulate me saying “well done, you’ve been so brave, I’m so glad you’re ok. I love you.”

[smoldher]

youre a good little cucumber, aren't you? you want to make mommy proud? then why dont you get youre green little body into this pickling jar filled of pickling vinegar, for mommy. oh, you still think youre a cucumber? even after all that time souring in the jar? not anymore, my sweet, or should I say, my Sour Littel Pickle 🥒

#mommy #femdom #t4t #cucumber #jar #vinegar #emptyspaces #pickling #mindbreak #cnc #picklefication #picklehypno

[smoldher]

LMFAO

[smoldher]

It's my 10 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

HOLY SHIT

[smoldher]

Embarrassed myself a few days ago and since then I've been periodically going like this

Ignore the part where he gets naked that's not part of it.

[smoldher]

the "feeling like something is wrong with you that you have to hide" background noise is often a result of childhood trauma because an abused or neglected child who doesn't rationalize their mistreatment runs the risk of alienating themselves from what little shelter and care is actually being provided. it's theorized that blaming yourself at that age is a way to survive by coming up with a justification for why you're being abused so you don't blame your caregivers for your own suffering, thereby alienating them to the point that you are fed or sheltered or protected even less than you are currently. believing you may be able to "change" so that you're worthy of love also prevents despair/giving up. it's of utmost importance to the survival of very small children to develop a worldview that keeps them alive, even if it's by totally magical thinking and at the cost of their ability to perceive reality or navigate normal human relationships. the same thing can happen to adults in abusive domestic situations.

anyway once you're out of that situation it's time to get really pissed off

[smoldher]

A Sea Witch’s Guide to Seashells

A handy guide to properly cleaning shells, when and how to collect them, and a few creative ideas for using them in witchy matters or altar decoration! 

By rainy-day-witchcraft

Cleaning

Seashells, whether inhabited by an organism or abandoned on the beach, almost always have that funky sea smell~ which can only grow as they are dried and left out. When cleaning shells, there are many different techniques. You can:

Boil ~ gently drop your shells into a stove-top pot and turn up the heat until the water reaches a boil. After a few minutes, turn it down to about half that heat, and let them simmer for 20-30 minutes. Tips: Shells must be dropped into the water while it is still lukewarm, so they gradually heat and do not break or crack from the cool to hot transfer / Take caution not to let the pot boil over, as the water is salty and will leave a residue that will need to be cleaned afterwards 

Bleach~ Soak your shells in a 50/50 water/bleach ratio for an hour or so. There is no set time, but be careful not to leave them in for too long, as the bleach will break them down!

Baking Soda scrub~ Mixing a paste-like mixture of water and baking soda, take an old toothbrush and scrub the shell for a few minutes. If you are dealing with a sanddoller, be sure to scrub more gently and in small circular motions

Burying~ Because barnacles, tiny organisms, or bits of the previous shell-owner can be left in hard-to-reach areas of the shell, burying a shell 18 inches into the ground for a few weeks is a useful technique to get rid of any stink-inducing sea thing. Because it is buried at this depth, it allows insects, larva, and ants to eat the remains of organism and leave the shell with no reason to smell after cleaning! If using this technique, bury it opening-down; it works especially well to preserve glossy shells, as most of the other methods may cause de-shining

If you are more of a pro-collector, consider using:

Muriatic acid~ dipping a shell in this chemical can majorly restore color and finish. However, on OLIVE shells (seashells that already have a shiny finish) this will do the opposite, and dull them

Shell Collecting

The best times to collect shells are during the New Moon and Full Moon, when the tide is at it’s most powerful. Beginning your collecting an hour before and after low tide is also a key time when seashells end up on the sand! While searching near the wet sand usually yields fresher shells, make sure you also do a little digging or check near the high-tide line.

The DON’T’s

Fragile shells, such as sand dollar, can crumble if cleaned too harshly or left in the sun

Do not clean with any type of vinegar! Vinegar can erode calcium, which is a main component in almost all shells

If you find two shells sealed tightly together, or anything that resembles a live clam or shellfish, do not collect these! There is an organism living inside, and it is illegal at many beaches to collect living seashells. Do the little guy a favor (and the environment) and throw it back into the ocean or leave it be ~ 

If any trace of sea creature is left inside or outside the shell, it will mostly never loose the fishy smell

Putting Shells to (Magickal) Use

In addition to looking nice or being cleaned/polished and made into decoration, they can also be used as:

Offering bowls

Talismans or Amulets

Representation of ocean or sea related gods/goddesses

Various magickal utensils (Magickal tools adorned with seashells, decorated on bowls or cups, hung as ornaments or charms, etc.)

In magick and witchcraft, they represent and are useful in:

The element of Water/West direction

Rounder, whiter shells can represent the moon, because of it’s influence on the ocean tides

Spells for emotion (water=emotion) protection (A shell is the protective covering for an ocean organism) creativity (water also=creative spirit), love (In reference to Aphrodite), and prosperity (Used as currencies around the world long ago) 

Particular shells also have their own meaning, such as these~

Abalone - general use and containment of empowered herbs and stones

Clam shells - purification and love

Conche shell - love

Cone shell - protection

Cowrie shell - prosperity, money - if you look at a cowrie shell is also looks very ‘feminine’)

Whelks - dramatic positive change

Limpets - courage, confidence, strength

Scallops - travel, movement

Sand~doller- prosperity, good luck

(Information gathered here)

Leave a message for Rainy-day-witchcraft if you have any questions, comments, or would like to see similar witchy guides! ➺ Rainy

[smoldher]

This is the best idea in the history of film.

[smoldher]

He looks like he's swimming in the Piss Jesus jar

my horrible son squangle he has every disease and is banned from running for office

[smoldher]

What's your thoughts on vegan zombies?

I mean like. The abrupt, tragic loss of one's individual identity, memory, and morality, replaced only by hunger, is kind of like. The principal thing about zombies. In my opinion

[smoldher]

No one ever tell me anything bad about the person who runs this account.

[smoldher]

Ok so my kid had an ear infection, right? As kids often do.

The doctor scraped out a bit of earwax to have a better look inside.

I was sent a bill for $200 PER EAR for this 5 second procedure which I did not give permission for them to do.

That was key- they did not ASK me if they could do this "procedure". And, as I OWN a medical practice (it's me. The medical practice is me, sitting in my house on video calls) I knew to call them when this bill came in to be like "You did not obtain informed consent for this procedure, and it was not en emergency procedure. You had full ability to gain my consent and didn't. I'm not paying."

And the massive hospital who owned the bill said "yuh-huh you do have to pay."

And I said "I own a practice. I know these laws. I do not owe you money for this."

And they conducted an "internal review" and SURPRISE! Decided I totally owed them money and they had never done anything wrong ever.

And so I called my state's Attorney General office, and explained the situation because, as I mentioned, I know the law. The AG got in touch within a couple days to say they were taking the case and would send the massive hospital conglomerate a knock it off, guys letter.

Lo and Behold, today I have a letter where said hospital graciously has agreed to forfeit the payment.

"How not to get screwed over by companies" should be part of civics class.

Know your rights and know who to call when they're infringed on. This whole process cost me $0 and honestly less effort than I would have expected.

May this knowledge find its way to someone else who can use it.

[smoldher]

scurvy has got to have one of the biggest disease/treatment coolness gaps of all time. like yeah too much time at sea will afflict you with a curse where your body starts unraveling and old wounds come back to haunt you like vengeful ghosts. unless☝️you eat a lemon

[smoldher]

i'm not a lesbian as far as i know and i already have a wife but thanks tumblr

[smoldher]

[smoldher]

💫

[smoldher]

Nobody's missionaries hustle like the Pentecostals, you gotta hand it to them.