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and then you can’t dump him until judgement, when it’s too late to start a romance with literally anyone else…..he is outplaying you from the first move he’s nefarious he’s machiavellian

blackwall’s first romance convo in skyhold is actually so fucked up bc it’s also his romance soft lock point lmao. like the point where other characters reject you because they consider you taken. to your face he’s all “noooo m’lady we caaaaant it’s not honorable nooo we have to break up” but as soon as you leave he’s apparently running to solas like “hey solas, you’re my boy and all but dibs is dibs yfm.” and solas is like “yeah fair.” all time most dishonest man

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a saint

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blackwall’s first romance convo in skyhold is actually so fucked up bc it’s also his romance soft lock point lmao. like the point where other characters reject you because they consider you taken. to your face he’s all “noooo m’lady we caaaaant it’s not honorable nooo we have to break up” but as soon as you leave he’s apparently running to solas like “hey solas, you’re my boy and all but dibs is dibs yfm.” and solas is like “yeah fair.” all time most dishonest man

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New uquiz: which vampire clan do you belong to? (Based on Vampire: the Masquerade V20, but no knowledge of the game is necessary.)

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my captain: teleporting a ship using mental math, breaking into prison, pulling a gun on space jeff bezos

parvati, ellie, ada: “dont fucking do that you’re gonna get us killed”

max, nyoka, and felix:

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you're laughing. greg ellis is literally out here pretending to be cullen rutherford narrating greg ellis' life in third person, game ending his own career and you're laughing.

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people are literally so boring a male character will kill 10000 people and steal candy from babies and theyll be like omg thats my king! but a female character is rude once and theyre like i hope she dies violently

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when doc mitchell pulls up the visiomatic reconstruction of your face like “how’d i do :-D” and it’s a dude that looks like a cross between a potato and a minnesota state senator.

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i can’t believe they whitewashed him is nothing sacred

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Thanks Blackwall we should hang out more often

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glow up

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once a month this post gets another note from a fellow buddhist gamer. when tathagata was talking about the sangha this is what he meant

i saw “enlightenment” and “light” and immediately pledged myself to the glorious watchman. idc what these cultists are calling him, that’s the amida buddha. you can’t fool me im fucking devout.

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glow up