stop-talking

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Rewatching the beekeeper rn

"I gotta go big dog this shit for a minute"

*runs to daddy wallace and asks him to fix it*

Hes such a loser 😭

I miss derek danforth. I need to see that stupid blonde mullet again

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I found this garbage in my drafts that I wrote on valentines day while drinking josh wine. By the end I had finished the whole bottle, so that's why it devolves very fast 😭💀

Mike schmidt x reader

When Mike asked you to come over, you obeyed immideately. As his friend, it was your duty to be there for him, no?

And he said it was an emergency.

"Mike? I cam over as soon as I could, I-"

He let you in immideqtely, pulling the door open practically as soon as you knocked. Like he had been waiting. Fpr you.

"Hey! I... I'm glad you came."

Silence lingered for a moment as you stard at him, before you fuinaklly tuend oyour atentjuon to the kitchen,.

"So? What';s the emergency?" yiou asked, scannning the kitechn. It was late, probalby too late ot be at mike schmidt's house,. But you didn't care. Any excuse to be arounf him was welcome.

"I... well, Abby's birthday is tommorw, and... well..." Mike gestured to some truly sad cuocakles, sad and burnt on the kitvhesn stove.

You couldn';t hold in a giggle, looking over the pathetic excuse fr baked goods, "Mike, ive seen you cook before,. You're amazing. what the FUCK is this??"

He blushed, quick to put himself betwween you and the sad excuse for baked goods. "Yeah, well, baking and cooking are different."

"mmmmhm. So you called me here at nearly 12am for cupcakes???" You ask, leaning in close and playfully glaring at the olde rman.

"W-well, I.... Abby really wants to give her class cupckaes. And I cant make them on my own. obviosuly." He ssays. sighing and moving over to gestjure to the burnt lumps in the bajing tray.

"I'd really apreciate some help." He looks at youu with his signateur e "wet dog" look, an expression exclusive ot the schnidts. He'd perfected begggging eyes, and was using it against you. Fucking schidt,.

"Can't you just.... follow the instrucstions on the back of the box?" you ask, pciking up a box of cake mix from the ocuntweer.

"I TRIED" Mike insists, shaking his head. "It always turns out wrong."

You just smile and shake your head. "So, you can make a 3 course dinnner but no make a bathc of cupcakes, Mikey?"

"something like that." he mumbles, kicvkin at the ground shyly.

OKAY ADN THEN YOU FUCK TYH?ER END !!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 hel yeah

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I miss derek danforth. I need to see that stupid blonde mullet again

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he is glowing!!

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how embarassing

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Need this

18+, mdni - masterlist | main masterlist

mike schmidt is the kind of guy who can’t stay still when you touch him - like sitting still is something he physically can’t do.

it starts simple, your hand slipping into his sweatpants as he leans back against the headboard, and suddenly he’s gasping, thighs tensing, head tipping back like the sensation short-circuited his whole body.

“f-fuck, wait-” he stutters, already twitching in your grip, like he wasn’t expecting you to just go like that. his hand shoots out, grabbing at your wrist but not stopping you - just grounding himself, trying not to fall apart too fast.

and god, the way he whimpers.

soft, broken little noises punched out of him every time your fist tightens just right, like he wants to be quiet but can’t help it. his hips keep lifting off the mattress like he's chasing the rhythm, like he’s not in control of his own body anymore.

“don’t stop, don’t stop- please, please, i can’t- ” it spills out of him, desperate and messy, voice shaking as you stroke him harder. he’s flushed all the way down his chest, jaw slack, trying to hold your gaze and failing miserably.

you brush your thumb over the tip and he bucks, whimpering like he’s being wrecked, panting like he’s already there. “shit, oh my god-i’m gonna- i-”

and when he does come, it’s with a choked cry, legs shaking, hands fisting in the sheets like he’s unraveling completely under you. and the second he can breathe again, he’s still twitching in your hand, forehead damp, chest rising fast like he’s run a mile.

you don’t even have to say anything - he’s already looking up at you with glassy eyes, lips parted like he’s still trying to figure out what the hell just happened.

no teasing, no comeback - just this quiet, stunned kind of awe, like he can’t believe how fast you undid him. like he wants more and can’t handle it at the same time.

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THE VANESSA SCENE REMINDS ME OF MIKE

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Oh he's feeling himself 😭

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Josh hutcherson when I drop him into the Weezer blue void:

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Hes such a fucking dork

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I forced my dad to watch the fnaf 2 trailer with me

Are first i didn't tell him what I was turning on and his first guess was "did it finally happen?" 😭💀

And then when Mike popped up on the screen he went "Peeta!"

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MIKE FANS!!! WAKE THE FUCK UP!! HES BACK!!

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This is the best thing to wake up to ever

WAKE UP!!! WAKE UP!!! TRAILER. it got leaked first but now it's officially out!!!! :DD https://youtu.be/dSDpoobO6yM

WHAT DO U MEAN W H A T

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Me when I get my hands on him

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New emote unlocked!

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I bought a purse from goodwill and while cleaning it today I found nitroglycerin tablets in it

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yk how movie theaters make like specialty items for movies (like the blue raspberry pop rock slushie for sonic 3)? what do yall think theyre gonna be doing for fnaf 2? are we gonna get like a rebranded cherry slushie thats the "blood of dead children slushie" like what are we doing?