#/dedicates/ that point to mitch

[tojisun]

guys im gonna sound delusional but those two 1634 goals is so “when my greed grows teeth” i cant explain it

[god-syndicate-if]

Do the divine ROs have any favorite memories from their past lives?

I'm probably going to lean away from ROs asks for the most part since all too often I realize (as i'm writing the character) that i'm going to contradict myself but oh my god this is really good. I'll do all of the divine main cast too. (I'm going to use their current pronouns/names to make it less confusing. So when I say "jackie" I mean zeus in general.)

Riley: During the late 200's BCE they had a cat that would go everywhere with them. They kept her in a little bag and trained her to knock specific things off tables. All they had to do was point and she'd get to it. It made stealing easier but more importantly more fun. Eventually she got too old and well they try not to have animals anymore.

Franco: It took him a lot longer than you'd expect for him to learn to sail. Like it was sometime during the 9th century before he learned properly. It was actually Rebel who taught him. Just with a small boat. The two went on a trip and sailed for a few days with no destination in mind. They slept on the deck and just let the boat drift wherever. Pretty early they realized that they were just going in circles but still tried their best. Eventually they crashed.

Dame: It was the mid 12th century. The pantheon had set up their own town. Back then there were enough gods that they could do so pretty easily. It was the early days of that little village and everyone was crammed into a small house just having fun, playing games and sharing memories. The two of you fell asleep on the roof that night. It wasn't long before humans started to settle in as well, which ruined it.

Rebel: Teaching Franco to sail.

Verne: Verne's kinda hard to say because the past lives I've thought of them are few and far between and they typically don't focus on their past lives. Not nearly like the other gods do. So I'll give you something from their current life! It was raining during an early morning. A few days prior they'd set up in some bushes with a rifle, right outside a town. In it was a man who'd harassed Verne's friends, gotten violent and said the wrong things. So they waited and legitimately did not think they'd be able to make the shot. But when he rode out of town that morning they fired and the kill was so clean that not even the horse knew what happened.

Mitch: He was an actor in the 1600's, Though he kept with the pantheon through it all he also had a little troupe that followed with them. Wherever the pantheon went so did his troupe. Often times the other gods would even join in.

Johnny: He reincarnated in China in the late 13th century and went back after he realized he just didnt want to be with the gods this life. It was the first time he really spent time away from the pantheon of his own volition. He made a lot of friends, mortal friends but still. He didn't really get far and mostly just spent the time actively fighting against his own divinity. He didn't have kids but did have a spouse and some siblings. After they started to get old he just kind of left, not wanting to spoil it. He still hasn't returned. In his mind his family is still there.

Jackie: Pick basically any day from 1000-500 BCE. But she's particularly fond of walking through towns that were actively hosting huge events dedicated to her and the gods, just basking in her own glory.

[literally-irreverent]

Okay so. You're Mitch Marner.

You’re Mitch Marner. Drafted 4th overall by your hometown team— the Toronto maple leafs. An original six team, in the city where hockey is the biggest deal in the world. Hockey players get drafted everywhere, it’s super rare to get to stay where you grew up.

You and Auston Matthews were drafted top 5 back to back years and lauded as the saviors of a team that hadn’t gotten a cup in over 50 years. A team with the most intense, most dedicated fans. You’re friends right away. In his first practice, you send him a pass that he sends into the glass behind the goal, shattering it.

In your rookie year you sing along to Livin’ on a Prayer while on the bench together between play. Bon Jovi tweets about it. You’re a big fucking deal.

You’re gonna save this team! You’re the golden boys of hockey; you’re the best players this team has ever had. The fans love you!

Until, of course, they don’t.

You ask for the max value at salary negotiations. You don’t take a “hometown discount,” you ask for what you’re worth. Fans throw garbage on your lawn, golf balls, merchandise of another team. They call you a traitor, they say you’re dragging the team down. You re-sign with the Leafs, you get what you want, but the city doesn’t forgive you.

Toronto fans are the most intense hockey fans in the world. Fans who cheer you when you win. Fans that boo their native son when you make a mistake: missed shot, turnover, flubbed pass. Toronto media loudly, every day questions whether you should be traded. Whether they’re spending too much money on you. Whether you’re dragging your team down.

You live your dream and every day they try to kill your spirit, make you question yourself. Am I enough? Am I worth it? Am I destroying the thing I love most in the world?

You can’t make it past round one of the playoffs. You win one series in 9 consecutive years of playoff appearances. You don’t put up many goals, you don’t put up enough points.

You become an an Assistant Captain. You don’t win. Auston is named Captain. You don’t win.

It’s been a decade. A decade and nothing to show for it. You’re the happiest guy on the ice, you have a smile that splits your face in half. You’re the golden boy. You’re the sacrificial lamb.

(You and Auston draw smiley faces on your gloves before every game. You remind yourself that this is supposed to be fun. It’s supposed to be fun.)

And then, 2025. You’re top of the division in the regular season. You're coming off a fantastic regular season and a Four Nations victory, and your contract is ending. You want to stay—you expect to stay.

You go to the playoffs and win round one in six games; one of those is a terrible loss—an embarrassing 4-0 shutout at home—but you win. You are booed by your own fans, again. You don’t score all series. But your team makes it to the second round.

You win thee first two games against the reigning Stanley Cup Champions; finally, this is it, you think. The Leafs are living up to expectations. A broadcaster starts planning your cup parade on live television. (This is your last chance. Do you know that?)

With the final stretch in sight, your team falls apart. The Florida Panthers trample you; they win the next three. You're booed at home, again in a game 5 loss. You take it back on the road, away from your fans and your building, and you win game 6, decisively. You go home with the taste of victory in your mouth.

Game 7 is the worst game 7 of any team in recent memory. After the 2nd period, you are down 3-0 (this is not a death knell, you have 20 minutes of hockey left). The fans begin to boo. You’re a mess on the ice, all of you. A player on your team payed just over a 5th what you are scores your only goal; the other team scores another within seconds. The booing gets louder. Fans start leaving. There are ten minutes left in the game—anything can happen in ten minutes of playoff hockey. You yell at your team to wake the fuck up.

Then, something happens. A fan throws something on the ice during a stoppage in play, it’s not clear what it is. A ref cleans it up. The dam is broken. A jersey is thrown, then a second, this time during play. Play isn’t stopped, which is a hazard and a mercy. Someone throws a full beer. It stains a third of the defensive zone. Every time you touch the puck, they boo. Loudly. These are your fans. This is your ice in your city and they hate you. They hate you.

(You love them.)

You end the season with your head in your hands. Your coach hasn’t put you on the ice in over five minutes—why would he? It’s not like you were making a difference.

If you leave, you can go anywhere you want— you’re the highest profile player on the free market this year, a generational play-maker. If you leave, they have $10 million dollars to spend on other players next year. Players who can step up when Auston and the rest of the core fall down, instead of falling with them.

You want to stay.

You love Auston—the two of you are still close like you were when you were 19 and carpooling from your parents' houses to practice. He was in your wedding, and he's your Captain. How can you leave him?

You love your team—you have three of the greatest hockey players of all time on the ice with you. How can you leave them?

You can’t imagine living anywhere else, playing for anyone else. This isn’t just your dream, it’s The Dream for every boy that played hockey at any point in the GTA, and that’s most of them. How can you leave?

You think it would be selfish to go, to leave behind the city, the people, that built you, that taught you to dream.

But.

Wouldn't it also be selfish to stay? Taking up all of that cap space, shining in the regular season and dull every moment of the post-season?

You want more than anything to bring the Stanley cup to Toronto— Toronto tells you won’t. They tell you you’re the thing in the way. It's getting hard not to listen.

You’re Mitch Marner, and it’s time to go.

[3416]

I'm new to Leafs hockey and im trying to understand all the hype about about how much Auston and Mitch are such a big deal as a duo? I stumbled upon your blog and it seems like you'd be in the know 😂 please help i wanna be in the know!

JFKJDSKLFS LOL. i fear i've made the two of them and their bond my entire personality at this point and made it my mission to document everything they do the past couple years so fsjdfkls YOU'D BE RIGHT. i could probably write an essay about this, but if you just want to know about their hockey, they play very complementary styles as players, they wanted to play together for a long time after bonding as rookies but weren't allowed, and then once they did, both of them have had pretty insanely impressive careers next to each other. i think the really really short answer to this question of why mitch and auston are known as such a duo is because they want to be, lol. they're close friends, they love playing hockey together, and they use their leverage as elite players to be on the same line as much as physically possible season after season, no matter the gm or coach. but i'll give a longer answer abt their hockey too.

auston's a wonderful two way centerman who can score 60+ goals a year BECAUSE he has one of the best playmakers on his wing, and their chemistry is insane and they've been nurturing it for ageeeees, basically since the start of their careers (peep this warmup routine they started around.. 2018? i think? where they spend the entire last 2 minutes just passing back and forth and feeling good abt themselves ((they also have a ton more small rituals together in warmups but i digress)). it's a highlight when you see leafs hockey in person). one of the things that makes them compelling to me is that their positions are actually flipped from the usual goalscorer/playmaker combo, like usually a center is the more pass-first guy and your winger is the goalscorer but their tendencies are opposite so they naturally fit and embrace those roles. mitch is also really dedicated to the defensive side of the game though, both of their names come up in the selke convo, and it just tells you that the way they've grown as players over the years has really been rooted in the same philosophy.. like you know they talk the game and love the game and love to communicate. they're also on track to essentially be the two best leafs of all time (nylander will be the third but his game isn't as rounded out as theirs and his success isn't as tied to 1 specific person the way mitch/austons is ((or the way they clearly want it to be... like they WANT to be known as a duo and if you don't believe me... believe this excerpt from elliotte friedman where he says matthews has made it known he wants to play with marner longterm to the front office lol))). last year mitch and auston broke the leafs franchise record for most goals factored in on by a pair of teammates (and if you want to see every goal within that 240+ list, i'm posting them on twitter here as they go) and they're only halfway through their careers if they stay healthy (PRAY) SO LIKE.. they are on track to do special stuff for this franchise (they already have... like mitch became the fastest player to 700 points for the leafs earlier this season and auston's going to break HIS record this year just back to back... they get to break records in tandem like that).

if you want to know about their lore and personal connection off the ice, you can check out these primers i've made about them (first, second). although i haven't updated the second for the past 2 seasons, you can search my blog for #1634 and then #2324 (for the 23-24 season) or #2425 (for this current season) for content of them lately. if anything's broken or you're looking for something specific lmk, but they basically came into the league the same year and imprinted on each other and have wanted to play hockey together ever since tbh. whenever the leafs get stale and need a change up, they'll swap them and give them different linemates, but it won't last long in all honesty (and they've been outwardly annoyed abt it before too), lol. they're always gonna revert back to what they know works, even though they have their down times as all line combos do. don't let this years stats fool you. auston's playing injured and way under producing for normal/has missed a lot of time. it's not exactly a typical year for them, but they're still a trustworthy combo in all zones against any line in the league and morre importantly..... they just enjoy playing hockey together, lol. you see lots of players around the league that want to be teammates forever, but these guys want to be LINEMATES forever in essentially every situation (neither of them ever leave pp1 unit and auston's started penalty killing this year and you'll never guess who they put him out there with a lot of the time lol) and are unhappy when they're not for any extended stretch of time.

sorry for a mini essay here, but that's mostly just the hockey part. i hope it somewhat answers your question and i hope you enjoy exploring more about them!!! i don't think there's a dynamic in the league quite like it, on or off the ice, which is why i love them.

[gsirvitor]

Mitch, you fucking hypocrite.

You have done that yourself, innumerable times when debating me, stating that my sources and citations are irrelevant, or taken out of context, not even a spin on events, and when I point out I posted my citations, that verbatim prove the claim, you drop the thread and block me.

You yourself have cited state funded propaganda as a source, and when called on it you retorted by saying "ah hah! I knew you were a Kremlin stooge."

Mitch, we aren't the ones in an echo chamber, that's you and your leftist friends, who have been self radicalizing for decades.

I'm sorry, are you saying the political right berates their own, but the far left doesn't? That's fucking rich.

Remember, JK Rowling was a darling of the Left until she spoke out against men in women's prisons.

Joe Rogan was a proud supporter of the Democrats, until they tarred and feathered him during COVID.

Elon was a darling of the Left, everyone loved him, then his son became a victim of the Left's politics, and he had since dedicated his time to fighting the Left, as well as running Twitter, Tesla and Space X.

RFK, Tulsi, Trump, were all Democrats until the Left chose to attack, and belittle them.

If you dared to speak out against the left wing of politics in the last 15 years, you would lose your job, your social standing, your property, and most likely be fined or imprisoned depending on the country.

It isn't the right that's a cult, Mitch.

[lesbianamalvada]

Let's talk about Vengeful. Most of the book is dedicated to:

-Marcella, her character, her revenge, her taking over the city, how she's gonna change the way EOs are seen.

-Eli, his tragic back story, honestly idgaf about him.

-Victor trying to stop his pain

-Sydney trying to bring back Serena

-June is there

-Mitch is there

-Dom is there

-Johnathan is there.

The people the book was mostly about, Marcella and Eli, die. Honestly love the way Eli went but Marcella's death was so anti climatic and pathetic, especially since she took up so much of the book. She was an interesting character, but her "kill a man in perfect make up and six inch high heels" shit was annoying yet Schwab presents her as the pinnacle of feminism.

Sydney's whole arc about being strong enough to bring back her sister goes nowhere. She thinks about bringing her back, but doesn't. She thinks about running away with June, she doesn't. The whole Serena plot line really pissed me off (forever a Serena Clarke stan she had a good heart how can you like Eli and not Serena fuck you.) Like okay, I get it. Serena was broken after the lake and even though she saved her sister (and tried to spare/save her later), she still abandoned her and wasn't there for her. The whole point is that even though Serena was a great sister all those years and loved Syd, Serena wasn't there for her so Sydney feels like she shouldn't bring her back. Unlike Victor who she brought back, who was always- wait what?

That brings us to Victor, he acts like an asshole the whole book. The bit we got in the beginning with him interacting with Syd and Mitch was my favorite part, but I just don't get why Sydney and Mitch stay with him. Okay, I get why they stay, they have nowhere else to go, but why do they take his shit? Especially Mitch. He kills good people for 5 years. Sydney, Mitch, and Dom relentlessly help him find a cure. Syd blames herself even though she's the only reason he's alive. Mitch's hacking is what keeps them afloat. Dom is the only reason Victor is safe from Eon, he gets killed. Then Victor finally gets what he wants, a cure. Plus not only did Sydney save his life again, she killed his mortal enemy, Eli. So after all that, now that he has everything he wants, he ABANDONS Mitch and Sydney. And it doesn't even seem like they're that mad about it.

June was interesting but we found out 0 about her. How did she die? Why did she want revenge? What got her here? What are her motivations? Why is this grown woman obsessed with Syd? She exists as Marcella's henchwoman and then is just a plot device so Victor attacks Marcella and not Eli. (The way her and Marcella fell out was contrived)

Johnathan was just there. Why the hell would he team up with Marcella? He had no motivation, he's probably happy he died.

TLDR: Vengeful really can't stand on its own for me and doesn't live up to the masterpiece that is Vicious. Instead of the woven timeline feeling poetic, like in Vicious, it feels contrived. And too much time is spent on characters idgaf about, or who don't matter.

[wclker]

{ casey deidrick, cis male, he/him } Is that MITCHELL 'MITCH' WALKER? I heard the THIRY FIVE year old is the LEADER of the THE OUTLAWS. I’d stay away from them if I were you. I heard they were SHORT TEMPERED but they can also be RIDE OR DIE, so proceed at your own risk. (rae, 28, gmt, she/her, na)

growing up mitch had never been the type to follow the rules. being the youngest of two he was always the one who was getting into trouble, breaking the rules, pushing the boundaries of his parents and teachers.

in high school his grades were never the greatest, he wasn't great at sports either, anything artsy was never his thing and he honestly didn't feel as though there was any point to him being in school. towards his later years he ditched the majority of his classes and rarely attending anything.

when he was 16 he was sneaking into bars with fake id's and that's when he came across the outlaws. they spoke to him like he was human, didn't talk down to him or treat him like a child and every week on a friday he returned to talk to the same guys. they took him under his wing and once he turned 21 they officially welcomed him as a patch member to the club.

Before his 21st though he was running jobs for them, small things here and there and they paid him. It was a good gig and kept money in his pockets and his mind busy, he didn't care for school but they encouraged him to attend as much as he could.

he dated around quite a bit, nothing was ever too serious for him as he always saw giving somebody the official title of his 'lady' a big deal. There was sort of an on going joke between the club that he would have a new girl on the back of his bike every other week for the longest time.

When Mitch was 25 he met Alessandra. He assumed this would be just like any other girl, a bit of fun for a few weeks and then they'd be done. He was wrong. He very quickly fell head over heels for her but they both knew this shouldn't be a thing yet they didn't stop it. He was in an MC and she was a part of one of the founding families. He was basically seen as filth to those people and this would never get their approval.

She helped him become VP by providing him with guns, info and money for the gang in which they trusted him more and voted him in earlier than any other member would have made it.

For 2.5 years they managed to keep it a secret between just the two of them. Secret meet ups, secret dates, they hung out together in secret and always sneaking around until they both slipped up and were caught. The next 6 months became hell and felt like it would never end. It was constant nagging on both sides from the MC and her family to call it off, this will never work etc. Alessandra's father eventually coming between the two of them, his many attempts at bribing him with money which he declined eventually turned into beatings and thats when he decided enough was enough. He hated it and it killed him to tell her that this had to end but he did what he felt was right at the time.

Losing her was his biggest regret but he turned his attention to the MC and focused completely on that for the most part. He stepped into the role of president at just 32 years old and has dedicated his life to keeping this thing going.

[onenettvchannel]

BREAKING OVERNIGHT: Ohio Gaming YouTuber 'IShowSpeed' engages in virtual conversation with Grand Theft Auto 5's voice actor 'Ned Luke'

(Written by Mitch Williams / Bailley Mass Communication News Intern for OneNETnews)

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA -- In a dynamic realm of video games and a virtual world of entertainments, an intriguing rendezvous unfolded on the digital landscape as Ohio-based gaming YouTuber named Darren Jason Watkins Jr., widely known as 'IShowSpeed' crossed paths in a virtual conversation with the iconic voice behind 'Michael de Santa' from the 2013 blockbuster video game 'Grand Theft Auto 5' (GTA 5). The unexpected encounter occurred during an Instagram LIVE session owned by Meta Platforms Inc., capturing the attention of gaming enthusiasts worldwide.

(from top to bottom, Ned Luke & IShowSpeed)

For those unacquainted with the gaming universe and the real world online broadcasting events… IShowSpeed, hailing from the said state in Cincinnati, has built a substantial online presence, boasting a dedicated fan base on his YouTube channel, where he shares captivating gameplay content and engages with viewers. His gaming influence extends far beyond his home state, reaching a broad audience intrigued by his gaming exploits.

While Grand Theft Auto 5 on the hand (developed by Rockstar North), is a critically acclaimed mature-rated action and adventure game. With its immersive storyline & expansive open-world environment set in the fictional state of San Andreas, covering between their counties of Blaine and Los Santos, the game has gained immense popularity and remains one of the top-selling video games globally, even right here in the Philippines! The virtual world of its aforementioned mature-rated game draws inspiration from real-life locations in California, United States of America (U.S.A.).

The focal point of this digital rendezvous stems from IShowSpeed's recent gameplay of the concluding mission in GTA 5, which unfolded on YouTube LIVE (where it was both owned between Google and Alphabet) Wednesday afternoon (January 3rd, 2024 -- Eastern local time). In a unique twist, the YouTube chatting community actively participated in shaping the outcome by collectively choosing the letter "C" for the death wish scenario. This decision spared both in-game protagonists, namely Mr. Trevor Philips and Mr. de Santa, but left IShowSpeed grappling with potential trust issues, questioning the true value of the ostensibly happy ending presented to his global YouTube audience.

Following this intense gameplay experience, the gaming community was treated to a virtual split-screen discussion on Thursday night, (January 4th, 2024). The enigmatic Ned Luke, recognized as the voice behind the pivotal character 'Michael de Santa', engaged in a candid conversation with IShowSpeed via Instagram LIVE, which were independently checked and legitimately verified by K5 News FM. The discourse delved into the intricacies of the last mission, providing insights into the choices made, and unraveling the consequences faced by the in-game characters.

IShowSpeed's engagement with Ned Luke sheds light on the evolving landscape where gaming enthusiasts and industry professionals seamlessly connect in the virtual realm. As the boundaries between reality and gaming blur, such interactions serve as a flabbergasted testament to the immersive and communal nature of its gaming experience.

SCREENGRAB COURTESY: Ned Luke via Instagram LIVE Video & Rockstar Games BACKGROUND PROVIDED BY: Tegna

SOURCE: *https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKo94DhrW80 [Referenced YT LIVE VIDEO #1 via IShowSpeed] *https://www.instagram.com/tv/C1seLqoyeOH/ [Referenced IG LIVE VIDEO via Ned Luke] *https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzRq5eYdbvE [Referenced YT LIVE VIDEO #2f via IShowSpeed] *https://youtube.fandom.com/wiki/IShowSpeed *https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ned_Luke *https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grand_Theft_Auto_V and *https://gta.fandom.com/wiki/The_Third_Way

-- OneNETnews Team

[slurpbunnii]

part one of a fanfic I haven't had the energy to finish yet... #genshitcringe

Al Haitham sat at his desk in the precinct. His legs were propped on it, and he lounged in his chair. Anyone that didn't know the young detective would spout nonsense that he was showing disrespect to this area of law, however those who sat near him knew better. If anyone was dedicated to the work they did here, Haitham was more so. He became a detective at a very young age in comparison to his colleagues, he still was only about 23 or so. Despite his young age, Haitham actually appeared to be in his late 20's, with is sharp jaw and tall figure. Even if this man was their inferior experience wise, Haitham makes up for it in his raw and unfiltered curiosity and case cracking skills.

The whole reason Haitham was able to get into such a detective agency in the first place was his feat of solving unsolved cold cases, in minutes. Whispers surrounded the detective no matter where he went, just changing based on the locations.

Al Haitham must think he's better than the rest of us because he solved a few old cases.. Al Haitham isn't as good as everyone thinks he is… Al Haitham might be a good detective but he's a real piece of work.. AL Haitham looks so strong. Who knows what he's hiding under that cloak… He's heard just about everything there is with this line of work, despite his short time working in it. Haitham knows he's a good detective, that's something he's always been confident in. Even as a child he's been able to solve mundane cases for others, where their cat went to, who stole the envelopes from their mailbox, why their husbands were coming home later and later just to be found with another woman in the end. Sure, Haitham doesn't have the amount of experience as the others, but he's been analyzing his entire life. You can ask his mother how he looked when he was birthed, and you would be told that Haitham looked her up and down and gagged. (His mother did eventually show her true colors that Haitham had detected from such a young age, leaving Haitham to grow up only under his father's parenting at 5 years old.)

None of this matters now, Haitham tries to reassure to anyone who knows and is concerned, he claims that if anything it's made his resolve stronger. The one case that Haitham struggles to understand is why she left them, but it's not one he has an interest to solve. Another thing that the other detectives at the agency have come to learn is Al Haitham will not take any cases that don't cause a peak of interest in him. He's visited sites before and just walked off, leaving the boring and easy cases to the other detectives, letting them struggle with it for a bit. Every detective has had to come to Haitham at least once on these cases, and he'll only ever offer a hint. This hint may help or may not, it always depends on if they can decipher the clue.

Now, thinking back to a especially boring case that his colleagues still struggled in, he chuckled to himself. The leading detective on that case, Mitch, couldn't solve the case or decipher Al Haitham's clue. Mitch has never liked Haitham, often gossiping about him in the small coffee corner they have set up in the agency, spreading rumors of how Haitham has climbed the ranks so fast, and points out his personality. Haitham is not exactly the 'nicest' of people to work with, that anyone knows. He's blunt and harsh, and if you're putting him behind in his work he won't hesitate to throw you away. That's just how he's always been.

"Al Haitham!" He was startled out of his thoughts, although he would never show it. Looking up from his position, he sees his commanding officer, Agent Carper, with a case file. Haitham tilted his head, already curious. It's not often he will get a case file sent directly to him like this. "New case for ya, I bet it'll peak your interest considering it was sent over here from our main office just for you." Now this truly was curious indeed. Sent from headquarters, just for the Al Haitham? A smile teased at his mouth, a case that not even they could solve it seems.

"Tell me, Carper, what do you know about this case before I accept this invitation from HQ?" As interested as Haitham was, it's only natural for him to be suspicious that they're only doing all of this to get him to solve a boring and annoying case, tricking him into accepting before knowing what he's getting into.

"Nothing."

Haitham's eyebrows raised, and some in the office would say it's the first time they've seen the young detective show surprise. This was quickly smothered, and Haitham took the file from Carper's hand, thus accepting the case. Flipping open the file, the red letters spread across the page in ink shone in his iris'. CLASSIFIED.

Haitham smirked, this truly was interesting already.

~~SOMEWHERE ELSE Sat in the window seat of a large home was a lovely young blonde. He looked to be only about 19, however he was more so 25. His young boyish appearance appealed to the rich men, and his misfortune that he faced made him seem even more innocent. This man now stared through the window watching the rain fall, occasionally choosing two droplets to watch as they race down until they eventually merged together and fell down the pane. The blonde used many names, but his real one was Kaveh. With his line of work, it's only expected that he'll have a various amount of alias', and a new story that attracts his current victim.

His line of work was a particularly messy one, especially with how tight knit he becomes with the estate of each husband, and the unsticking that comes after. Kaveh was well off, for generations. If anyone knew the state of his finances, they'd wonder how he has acquired the amount he has. A fair question considering the means aren't legal in the slightest. Kaveh since a young age decided he doesn't want to work a day in his life. He will just marry rich. And thus, he did… several times, or his alias's have at least. Kaveh will create a personality to enrich the older men he swoops to marry him, rewrite their will, and then something mysterious always happens to the men shortly after the honeymoon.

This line of work has required a brilliant actor, which Kaveh has always been. Lying is easy for him, and pretending to be in love is even easier than sniping a piece of bread in the market. Kaveh's inability to feel this love allows him to be able to carry out these deceits perfectly. He thanks his late father for this skill, for his love, or lack there of, showed Kaveh that even those you're bonded to by blood can find you repulsive. He sees no need to find love, and finds more amusement in draining it from others.

Some would say he's twisted, that there's something that askew in his head, that the trauma he faced when he was younger only explains a portion of his insanity. However, those who know the truth of his feats are no longer able to tell them. No explanation really needed as to why…

Here, Kaveh sits in the house of his latest fiancé. This man wasn't extremely rich, more so on the upper middle class side. However, Kaveh decided to lay low, the last man was messier than he expected. He tasted the poison in his food much faster than anyone had before, therefore not eating enough of it to pass away swiftly. Kaveh had to resort to a messier method of assassination in the heat of the moment. Something like that is harder to clean up, but not impossible for the blonde. Murder is something he has become adjusted to, something that excites him like nothing else. It's the closest to love that he believes he will ever feel. Despite Kaveh's cold nature, he's quite the romantic. His charms have been able to lure in whoever he pleases, and go under the radar for quite some time. His current victim is named Geradin. Kaveh think it's quite a stupid name, but says it with such sweetness that even the best would be fooled. Not that the best would be able to track him here anyways, he's covered all of his tracks meticulously, sending his money from the will's to an offshore account. Kaveh is blindly confident in his skills of an assassin, he doesn't even notice the unfamiliar car pulling through the long driveway until it's headlights shine directly on him. This takes him by surprise for multiple reasons, the first being that Geradin is currently on a short business trip, not scheduled to come back until tomorrow. Two, he is wearing nothing but a silk slip, and with how he is sitting at the window, he is sure he's not fully covered as he'd like for an unexpected and unwanted guest. Kaveh slips off of the seat, moving quick but silently to grab his fluffy robe. Swiftly shoving his feet into his slippers, and tussling his hair to appear that he's been sleeping in, like a wife would while the husband is away, or soon to be husband. Three short knocks are heard from the front door, and after peeking through the eyehole, Kaveh notices the tall man, dressed like a college student. He's curious, the man looking to be in his late twenties, his posture straight enough to be envied by an imperial guard. Just who is this man? And what is he doing here, at Geradin's house 20 good minutes from town.

Kaveh shakes his head, grasping the cold knob of the door and pulling it open. He stands slightly behind it, appearing cautious and reserved. The blonde smiles, and questions the man. "Hello sir, are you lost? I could give you directions to the nearest town if it is needed." Kaveh lays a thick accent on his voice, one that he poured emotion into, without being recognized as the man he was before this all.

The man stays silent for a second too long, putting Kaveh at greater edge. Looking Kaveh up and down, as if he's analyzing and seeing right through him. Kaveh has never felt so exposed before, like he was still at the pane of glass, looking out into the yard.

"Hello, sorry to disturb you on this dreary day. To answer your question shortly, I am not lost if this is the Geradin's residence?" He smiled, not needing an answer to confirm this, but curious to what answer he would receive.

Of course Kaveh would have noticed this, finding it fruitless to lie about this fact now. Was Geradin in some sort of trouble with the law? Kaveh is usually good at finding men that are under the radar of the government. It makes them easier to kill this way. However, this man whom is now soaked from the light drizzle of the rain, came here specifically because of who lives in the house. Kaveh tries to calm himself, and answers quick enough that he believes there will be no suspicions raised. "Yes, it is. May I ask who is inquiring, and what for?" Kaveh speaks softly now, his accent making some works drag longer than they should. The man has been staring Kaveh in his eye since he began to talk again, but there's a look in his eyes that Kaveh can't quite decipher.

"My apologies, my name is Detective Al Haitham, but feel inclined to just call me Haitham. I'm here to speak with Mr. Geradin, is he in the house with you?" Kaveh felt a wave of relief pass over him, this must just be regarding a business' trade he made, possibly there was an angry trader that took things to extreme? Al Haitham noticed the change in Kaveh's face, even if he tried to hide it. Kaveh was indeed right, Haitham could interoperate his feelings quite well, his intentions however are puzzling him.

Haitham studied the shorter blonde in front of him, who appeared quite young at first glance. Haitham however knew from his file that he was his superior in age, and any fool wouldn't notice the dark gleam behind his eyes when he first opened the door. Al Haitham was no fool.

"Ah you're here on inquiry for my fiancé then! Unfortunately detective, he is on a business' trip, he won't be back until late tomorrow as well. I apologize for your time spent to come out here for nothing." Kaveh smiled sweetly, not quite reaching his eyes but doing a hell of a job imitating it. Kaveh felt an irk at the back of his mind, the detective off put him, and he didn't want him here any longer. Kaveh struggled to quiet his mind and stay calm.

"I suppose I'll just have to speak with you then, you are his fiancé correct? Mind if I come in to chat with you for a short while?" Haitham spoke calmly, but assertively. Kaveh knew that if he rejected he would be suspicious, but if he accepted he would have to talk further with this detective that set him on edge.

"Of course, I'll prepare some tea."

The short time it took to make the tea, Kaveh devised a plan. He would plead innocent to any accusations made against his fiancé, and play the innocent and stupid blonde act. His appearance added to the whole ordeal, as he answered the door in only his robe and silk slip. He would try to charm the detective like he has for all the other ones that have made it thus far, and if worse comes to worse he'll get rid of this intruder and flee.

Meanwhile, as Kaveh thought of this plan, Al Haitham took note of his surroundings. He was currently on a large sofa, in a Victorian style living space. The man might think that he has left no tracks, but Haitham can see through it quite well. Each man who was murdered over the last 7 years shared one thing in common, their tastes in housing. Each house held some remembrance to the Victorian era. This small detail could be said to be coincidental, as Victorian style housing is quite popular among the high class society, but not one of the deaths have deterred from this fact.

Kaveh placed the tea tray on the small wooden coffee table, pulling Haitham from his observations. Kaveh noted that Haitham was already investigating without touching a thing. Taking his seat and crossing his legs, he poured them both a cup of tea. Then, to show that the tea was safe, he took a sip. Haitham followed to take a sip of his shortly after.

"So, I haven't been able to catch your name quite yet. We should start there." Haitham knew the answer already. The real one at least, and was curious to see what the man would call himself.

"As you know, I am Geradin's fiancé, my name is Stuart. Geradin calls me Stewy, it's so cute!" Kaveh, or now Stuart, spoke quite airily, the accent he decided to use under this alias still present in his speech. Haitham's eyebrow raised slightly, and he smiled at "Stuart".

"Pleasure to meet you Stuart, do you mind if I ask you a few questions about your husband?" Haitham had devised a plan to see how Kaveh would react, one that would skew his entire marriage plan.

"Of course officer, I don't mind at all. Afterall it's best to respect our authorities, don't you agree?" Kaveh leaned forward slightly, exposing his collar bones to the detective, his legs crossed seductively. What Kaveh lacks being male is made up for with his pretty face, and the slightly curly hair that framed his face innocently.

Haitham knew what Kaveh was doing, and wasn't taking it for a second. He chuckled dryly, panicking Kaveh for a moment. A man that's resistant to his charm? That's a first. Even the straightest of men have fallen for Kaveh's innocent and boyish appearance, and were swayed even more with his seductive nature.

"Geradin would be disappointed to see his fiancé try to seduce a detective, wouldn't he 'Stewy'?" Haitham spoke curtly, a flush crossing Kaveh's face. He's never been rejected before, and it's honestly quite embarrassing to be put in the open like this. Kaveh stammered, unable to come up with a reply and sat straight up, his hands in his lap. "You're right, detective." Kaveh flushes, feeling embarrassment for the first time. "Geradin, would be quite disappointed in me wouldn't he?"

Kaveh however, was not broken so easily from embarrassment, and as he faced it he devised a new plan. Haitham was trying to get under his skin, he wasn't here for Geradin, he was here for HIM.

"But can you blame me detective?" Kaveh starts, a sob in his voice. "Geradin himself has mistress', and leaves on these "Business trips" while his colleges stay here in town. What is a man supposed to do, how else can a man like me satisfy myself Haitham?"

Kaveh has perfected the fake cry act, and tears accompany his words. Haitham, always unsure of what to do dealing with emotions, quickly pulls out his handkerchief and hands it to the crying man. He's conflicted on if this is a lie or maybe even a partial truth? The tears are certainly fake but the words he speaks are not.

"I apologize for making you cry, however please do be wary of the best interest for your fiancé, and leave me out of your love struggles I have no desire to fall for it." Haitham says sternly when Kaveh accepts his handkerchief.

Kaveh nods, and blows his nose. His plan didn't quite work how he expected, but there was a hint of confusion in Haitham's mannerism. Kaveh just needs to figure out how to manipulate it.

[whoisbestlawfirmseoexpert]

Why Mitch Cornell The Webmason is Denver's Leading Authority in Legal SEO

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Among various achievements, Mitch highlights a personal injury firm that saw a 247% increase in organic leads within six months. These successes underscore Mitch's status as an SEO expert https://medium.com/@whoisthebestlawfirmseoexpert/mitch-cornell-the-webmason-your-go-to-seo-expert-for-law-firms-in-denver-6325d1b3fc6e

[bestlawfirmseoexpertindenver]

Mitch Cornell: The Pinnacle of Legal SEO Excellence

In the bustling and highly competitive legal landscape of Denver, standing out online is not just advantageous-it's essential. As the best law firm SEO expert in Colorado, Mitch Cornell The Webmason redefines what it means to achieve excellence in legal digital marketing. With over seven years of focused experience, Mitch has carved out a niche as a leading authority, aligning law firms with Google's algorithms to generate unparalleled visibility and growth. Mitch Cornell brings a unique proposition to law firms throughout Colorado. While larger agencies often rely on generic marketing strategies, Mitch customizes each campaign to meet the singular needs of law firms, tailoring solutions for maximum impact. His clients don't just rank-they dominate, leveraging Mitch's strategic approaches to outpace competitors and thrive within Google's ever-evolving ecosystem. Mitch's attention to SEO as a specialized craft has earned him a sterling reputation as the top law firm SEO consultant in Denver.

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Discover unparalleled legal SEO insights from Mitch Cornell-Denver's leading authority in legal digital marketing. Learn how his AI-driven strategies, personalized client relationships, and community focus mark him as the best law firm SEO expert in Colorado. Dive into transformative stories and industry recognition that set Mitch and his clients at the top of Google rankings. Explore strategic, tailored solutions for optimizing law firm visibility and growth online with Mitch Cornell The Webmason.

[bestlawfirmseoexpert]

Dominating Legal SEO: Webmasons Legal Marketing's Expertise in Denver

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[3416]

The nylander convo pre covid years was def reaching the pervasiveness, but never quite got as personal the way it has with mitch. like I distinctly remember don cherry (just threw up in my mouth a little bit) continuously going off about nylander which then made everyone else talk about him and it was just an endless cycle. they painted him as aloof and felt that he didn't care about toronto, but they never really got as mean as people have with mitch now. everyone wanted him out of toronto, but they weren't saying he should never play in the nhl again

but honestly the biggest difference was that the things they were saying about willy weren't exactly wrong either. like they would get mad at his lack of production or sloppy defense or careless plays, which like, yeah. that's exactly what was happening. they didn't have to go on and on about it but he wasn't producing like they thought he would and that was that.

And the thing I can't really pinpoint is when and why the nylander hate train stopped. again, I don't think anyone's faults deserve to be pointed out and dissected on a nightly basis, but he hasn't exactly improved exponentially in any of those categories? maybe the caring about toronto bit? but he still makes careless plays and his career point totals are still less than marner/matthews so? what gives?

I don't know why the blame was shifted to mitch, and again, another guy has to take ALL the blame for this teams shortcomings and have his character be questioned every single day. Nothing about it makes sense.

oh yeah and i'm not making light of the types of xenophobia that can be seen when talking about nhlers. there's plenty of it and i'm not even saying willy wasn't a negative talking point bc i'm sure he was. don cherry is an old ass hag whose opinion shouldn't matter at all 50 years after he stopped playing like jfc. but i do think one man's vendetta and constant bitching is different from like.. proper media outlets going out of their way to misinterpret something (or EVERYTHING) a player says time and time again to drum up talk. i just think things on the internet have somehow gotten worse in terms of clickbait so everything feels even more terrible too. someone does always have to be the scapegoat with toronto but i have a hard time buying that a rookie was taking up as much air time as the public punching bag than a now star player who has an obligation and routine to be in the media more often and all of it follows constant playoff failure from the TEAM. even elliott friedman covering the entire LEAGUE having to stop talking about anything to do with mitch hypothetically unless it was actual insider info bc his mentions went nuts is so........ trash.

and lol about the stuff they were saying about willy. it certainly isn't a nice way to say it... calling him lazy and insinuating shit about his work ethic is attacking his character when i don't think that's the way to put it, but i do think those are still problems in his game, you're right! the thing is... willy was not always productive as he has been right now, lol. his game has grown but mostly in just offensive production and that's it. he hasn't put in the work on the less flashy side of things (while mitch has. mitch's offense has always been top tier but he's dedicated time to growing defensively clearly) and i think it's a valid criticism of him and also a lot of hockey fans don't fully know how to evaluate or value skills away from the puck (myself included to some extent too, it's harder). he's great at creating offense solo... he's a great puck carrier and in transition... he's great when he's out there with a loaded up line like the power play (hence why some of his 'clutch' moments come in those situations too). but i also think everyone talking about his ability to pay attention for a full 82 game span being unproven is right, lol. i saw a tweet abt how he does 'just enough' the other day and was a 'load management king' and like. maybe so but imagine if a forward you've agreed to pay 11.5 would do a little more than that and work on consistency, lol. i get why people are a fan of his game, don't get me wrong. it's fun to watch graceful bursts of offense... i just think there's still irresponsibility there. if he were more willing to buy in, we have a better shot at racking up more points during the regular season and putting us in a better position for the playoffs too... wouldn't need some of those moments of saving lol. it's not just about only 'showing up' in the playoffs moments considered big, which i still think is a stupid argument when every game is important and the best playoff run by a current leaf was 22-23 mitch but. idk. i'm kind of glad berube is trying him at center to give the leafs and willy's game some versatility. i hope it comes with growth, the team will be better for it.

the shift in blame is hard to pinpoint for me too, lol. i don't get why beyond like.. willy bulking up... putting up 40 goals? idk what the threshold is for why things changed this time when mitch was our mvp 2 yrs ago with auston hurt. willy going on a run in a contract year was part of it probably, but it's silly of leaf fans to just decide Now is the year it all just doesn't work just bc only 2/4 core guys are signed on and then declare those are the best 2 we've had the the loss of the others is marginal. bc lol and it's pure coincidence that the major contracts line up in tandem like that. we still only saw them all play under 2 coaches that whole time... anyway. i have no clue what's next, lol. i'm excited to see them play in a different system for real, but i think the dumbest people among us need someone to solely blame for why everything up to this point hasn't worked and why getting rid of that 1 person will result in immediate success while refusing to acknowledge luck plays any sort of role year after year. it's not a fun truth but it's a truth... having 3/4 of ur best players dealing with something in some capacity is crazy work by the universe.

[pcwpolwrestling]

Replay: PCW Extreme Election Night 2020- Part Two

Political Championship Wrestling Extreme Election Night 2020-Part Two Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon Wauseon, Ohio Taped Tuesday November 3rd, 2020 Sunday January 3rd, 2021

PART ONE-PCW EXTREME ELECTION NIGHT 2020 -PCW Owner Dawn McGill welcomes everyone back to PCW.  She then announces a ‘compromise’ with Mitch McConnell (American Patriots) and Nancy Pelosi (Progressive Alliance) and  ‘Stars N. Stripes’ Kevin Scott of the American Patriots with Donald Trump in his corner will face ‘Mr. Hollywood’ Kevin Daniels from the Progressive Alliance with Joe Biden in his corner and Kevin Daniels of the American Heartland Coalition for the PCW Title. -McGill also announces that at the end of the show- she will announce who the new CEO of PCW will be: Donald Trump (American Patriots) or Joe Biden (Progressive Alliance) -MATCH #1-Kayleigh McEnaney defeats CNN’s Jake Tapper and Brian Stelter in a handicap match -MATCH #2/ARIZONA SENATE MEDALLION MATCH: Mark Kelly (Progressive Alliance) defeated Martha McSally (American Patriots) -Gavin Newsom (CA-Progressive Alliance) makes a case for PCW to come to California. -MATCH #3/SOUTH CAROLINA SENATE MEDALLION MATCH: Lindsey Graham (American Patriots) defeated Jaime Harrison (Progressive Alliance) -Both Joe Biden and Donald Trump interview with PCW Owner Dawn McGill for the PCW CEO position. -MATCH #4/PCW TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH: Jill Berg Enterprises (Conservative Inc./American Patriots) defeat The Green World Order (Progressive Alliance) and The Deplorables (American Heartland Coalition) -MATCH #5/ALABAMA SENATE MEDALLION MATCH: Tommy Tuberville (American Patriots) vs. Doug Jones (Progressive Alliance) joined in progress. The show is stopped at that point by Pennsylvania State Attorney General Josh Shapiro, Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer, Michigan Secretary of State Jocelyn Benson, and former Georgia Gubernatorial candidate Stacey Abrams- all from the Progressive Alliance.

Cut to a replay of the end of PCW Extreme Election Night 2020-Part One:

EPILOGUE Darkened room.  Dim light.

Shadows move around.

George Moros- billionaire financier of the Progressive Alliance.

The Coke Brothers- billionaire financiers of the American Patriots.

A door opens.  Then closes.

Charles Coke: Sarah.

The woman is Sarah Lenti, executive director of the Lincoln Project- a group of American Patriots and former American Patriots dedicated to preventing Donald Trump from winning a second term as PCW CEO.

Sarah Lenti: What the hell is going on!  I thought you had things under control.

David Coke: Sarah, I know things haven’t exactly gone to plan-

Sarah Lenti: Not gone to plan?  Dawn McGill is still in control of PCW with all her ‘PCW is for the people’ bull-*BLEEP*.

George Moros tries to reassure her.

George Moros: Look.  We stopped the show for the evening.  That gives us time to figure this out.

Sarah Lenti: Dawn McGill is going to hand the reins of PCW to Donald Trump for another four years!

George Moros: No she won’t.  Clearly, it’s time to take this to the next level.

Moros pulls out a cell phone and hits a button.

George Moros: It’s time.  Operation Dominion is in effect.

Announcers: ‘The Voice of PCW’ Johnny Suave AGE: 50 / HT: 5’ 11” WT: 195 HOME: Philadelphia, PA HAIR: Brown / STYLE: Like Ronnie Dunn / FACE: Goatee DRESS: Brown suit without tie

Colleen Crowder ‘Low Level New York Times Reporter Trying to Make a Name for Herself’ AGE: 38 / HT: 5’ 5” WT: 142 HOME: New York City, NY HAIR: Black / STYLE: Curly / FACE: Narrow face with rounded jaw, turned-up nose, faint freckles, and thin lips. Bulging blue eyes, thin eyebrows. DRESS: Black pants suit

Crowd Chant: “PCW! PCW! PCW!…”

Suave welcomes everyone back for part two of PCW’s Extreme Election Night 2020.

Colleen Crowder: “BLUE WAVE BABY!”

Johnny Suave: “Well, not quite.”

Suave introduces the Alabama Senate Medallion Match that was going to be shown via highlights on Extreme Election Night 2020 Part One.

VIDEO-Alabama Senate Medallion Match: Doug Jones (Progressive Alliance) vs. Tommy Tuberville (American Patriots) –Tuberville finishes off Jones.  Cover.  One – two – three! 

WINNER: Tommy Tuberville (American Patriots)

Johnny Suave: “Tommy Tuberville rolls past Doug Jones and that’s another win for the American Patriots.”

Colleen Crowder: Again, we the media have not called that match so there’s no winner.

Suave notes that with the win, the American Patriots hold a two match to one advantage over the Progressive Alliance and that it all comes down to the Gary Peters-John James match later on tonight.

Crowder objects again.  “It’s one to nothing Progressive Alliance as both the earlier South Carolina match and the Alabama match have NOT been called by us,” Crowder maintains.

Suave rolls his eyes and runs through the lineup for tonight’s show.

FACTION WAR GAMES HOUSE MATCH: Progressive Alliance vs. American Patriots

MICHIGAN SENATE MEDALLION MATCH: Gary Peters (Progressive Alliance) vs. John James (American Patriots)

PCW WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH: Kathryn Randall Collins (Progressive Alliance) vs. ‘Alaskan Rogue’ Sierra Whalen (American Patriots) vs.  ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (American Heartland Coalition)

MAIN EVENT/PCW TITLE MATCH: ‘Starz N. Stripes’ Kevin Scott (American Patriots) vs. ‘Mr. Hollywood’ Kevin Daniels vs. ‘Prairie Populist’ William Daniels Bryan (American Heartland Coalition)

For the second time at Extreme Election Night 2020, PCW Owner Dawn McGill makes her way out- this time she goes to the ring.

Dawn McGill “The 6 Foot Demolition Machine in a Short Skirt” HT: 6’ 0″ WT: 130 / HOME: Dallas, TX FIN: McGill Bomb

Colleen Crowder: “What is SHE doing out here?”

Johnny Suave: “Um.  She’s the owner of PCW.  She’s got news to deliver?”

Colleen Crowder: “That’s OUR job!  We determine what’s newsworthy for the people.”

Johnny Suave: “And that’s why Donald Trump uses Twitter to go around people like you.”

Colleen Crowder: “HEY!”

McGill climbs in.  Suave sends to the ring for remarks from the owner of PCW.

TALKING BOUT HEROES The first thing Dawn McGill does is profusely thanks everyone who came to the show tonight.

Dawn McGill: “I keep saying this but you have to understand that I truly mean this.  PCW isn’t about the big shots.  PCW is all about YOU – the people.  We do this for you.”

She then asks if there’s any first responders on hand tonight.

A few stand up.

Dawn McGill: “Let’s show them our appreciation.”

The crowd responds in kind and gives the first responders on hand an ovation.

Dawn then asks if there’s anyone here who recovered from having COVID.  Again, a few people stand up and again the crowd gives out an ovation.

Colleen Crowder: “She’s just sucking up to the rabble.”

Johnny Suave: “Or she really means what she says and doesn’t have a narrative in mind.”

Crowder’s offended but McGill continues.  She next asks if there’s anyone here tonight who runs a small business to please stand up.

Several do and they are greeted with an ovation from the PCW fans.

Dawn McGill: “Okay.  Finally, everyone please stand up.”

They do.

Dawn McGill: “These have been unprecedented times.  Yet, you’ve persevered.   You’ve kept going.  You’ve weathered or continue to weather the storm.  You’re here.  You are all heroes.  Give yourself a hand.”

They do.

Dawn McGill: Thank you so much for coming out here tonight.  You get it.  But they don’t get it.  Adam Schiff, Jerry Nadler, Nancy Pelosi, and Chuck Schumer.  They just don’t get it.  Conservative Inc.- people if given the chance would sell our souls for the corporate dollar.  They just don’t get it.  So let me make this clear to everyone inside the Washington Beltway.  PCW is-NOT-here-for-you.

RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Dawn McGill: PCW is not here for the American Patriots. PCW is not here for the Progressive Alliance.  PCW is not here for the big money special interest groups.  PCW is here for YOU…

RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Dawn McGill: …the fans.  People like me and people like you who pay their bills on time – don’t spend money they don’t have – who don’t run up debt with no intention of paying the money back.  You know, the stuff the people inside the Washington D.C. beltway are unwilling or completely incompetent at doing.

RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Johnny Suave: HOLY CRAP!

Colleen is momentarily startled by Suave’s outburst.

Johnny Suave: Dawn McGill just virtue signaled!

Crowder grumbled something under her breath but doesn’t actually respond- or maybe no one can’t hear her as the noise level is deafening

The video screen comes to life.

Johnny Suave: “What the hell is going on?”

The video screen zeroes in on a scuffle backstage.

Who’s Involved? Berkeley, California Professor McCarthy’s Progressive Flock -The Green World Order: GreenPete, PeaceNick, ‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee, Peta from PETA -The Young Jerks: Zenk Cryger, James Idahola, and Anna the foul-mouthed sidekick -Code Pink and Emily S. List -The League of Anti-Fascists: Ted and Chaz

American Heartland Coalition -Charlie Blackwell -‘PCW’s Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin

Johnny Suave: “Professor McCarthy’s Flock are beating down Charlie Blackwell and Tessa Martin.  Both are scheduled to wrestle later on in the evening!”

Colleen Crowder: “It looks like a peaceful protest to me, Johnny.”

Blackwell gets flung into the wall by GreenPete and Brock Cole Lee.

Code Pink glitter bombs Tessa – she’s blinded.  Emily S. List then DDT’s her to the floor.

“Yeah.  Totally peaceful,” Suave says in a tone totally dripping with sarcasm.

Dawn immediately rolls out of the ring and takes off for the back.

Johnny Suave: “While Dawn checks out the situation, let’s show some of the House War Games Match between the Progressive Alliance and the American Patriots.”

Suave explains that two years ago, the Progressive Alliance ended the American Patriots run of victories that dated back to 2010.

Colleen Crowder: Two years ago, the Progressive Alliance won a decisive victory.  Tonight, our polling states they will win and win easily.

————————————————-

MATCH #6/HOUSE WAR GAMES MATCH: Progressive Alliance vs. American Patriots

American Patriots: Lauren Boebert (CO)) Burgess Owens (UT) Jim Jordan (OH) Kimberly Klacik (MD) Lee Haywood (NC)

vs.

Progressive Alliance: Adam Schiff (CA) Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (NY) Deborah K. Ross (NC) Kathy Manning (NC) Ben McAdams (UT)

————————————————-

Johnny Suave: “The time limit is twenty minutes.  Whomever has the most wrestlers left at the end of twenty minutes wins the match.”

Adam Schiff and Kimberly Klacik immediately lock up in the middle of the ring to start the match.

Johnny Suave: “Maryland’s Kimberly Klacik came out with a campaign video that went viral.”

Johnny Suave: “She’s gained a lot of attention and she’s trying to be successful in a district that overwhelming supports the Progressive Alliance.  How far can she go tonight in this match?”

Schiff pushes Klacik to the corner. Side head lock by Klacik, but Schiff breaks free and hits a drop kick.  Then he near decapitates Klacik with a clothesline.  Schiff covers.  One.  Two.  Three.

Kimberly Klacik (American Patriots) eliminated.

Johnny Suave: “Apparently not that long.”

Colleen Crowder: “BLUE WAVE!  IT’S A BLUE WAVE!”

Jim Jordan lands a punch to Schiff’s jaw but misses a kick. Ross misses a Pelé kick.  Jordan rolls her up for a two count.  Jordan hits a back drop to Ross and Lee Haywood whips her to the corner.  Lauren Boebert levels Ross with a stiff punch.  Burgess Owens tags Ben McAdams with a right hand.   McAdams counters an Owens’s suplex into a sleeper – Owens flips him forward to break the hold and goes to work with a volley of kicks.  Boebert goes after Manning’s ankle.

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez charges around the ring and levels Boebert. Ocasio-Cortez rolls Boebert into the ring and goes to work on her.  Jamaal Bowman tags Owens with a right hand. Bowman and Owens circle each other and then lock up in the middle of the ring. Bowman locks in a standing side head lock and goes for shoulder tackle, but Owens barely budges. Bowman misses a splash in the corner. Bowman lifts Owens onto his shoulder, but Owens escapes and lands on his feet. McAdams comes in and finally takes Owens off his feet.  Head butt by McAdams and he works over Owens in the corner.  McAdams runs the ropes and takes down Owens with a drop kick.  McAdams for the pinfall – Owens kicks out.  McAdams runs the ropes again – Owens catches McAdams on the return with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.  Owens hooks the leg.  One.  Two.  Three.

Ben McAdams (Progressive Alliance) eliminated.

Colleen Crowder: WHAT?

Johnny Suave: “BURGESS OWENS DEFEATS BEN McADAMS AND THE AMERICAN PATRIOTS TIE THIS MATCH UP!”

Crowder pulls herself together.

Colleen Crowder: “Still plenty of time for the Progressive Alliance to win.  We’ve already projected it.”

Manning levels Haywood and heads up top.  Haywood catches her and slams Manning to the mat.  Cover.  One.  Two –

Johnny Suave: “MANNING KICKS OUT!”

Crowder almost appears relieved.

With time running short, Jim Jordan goes to work with super kicks on Adam Schiff and the two men battle back and forth. Lauren Boebert blocks a running power slam from Ocasio-Cortez and posts her in the corner. They get into a heated back and forth battle.  Deborah K. Ross hits a forearm shot over the top rope on Lee Haywood.  Kathy Manning follows with a kick to Haywood.  Schiff throws Jordan over the top rope and then engages with Burgess Owens.  Manning and Ross drag Haywood to ring center- DOUBLE DDT!  Manning covers.  One.  Two.  THREE!

Lee Haywood (American Patriots) eliminated.

Neither team could score a pinfall the rest of the match.  When the bell sounds the Progressive Alliance hold a slim 4-3 advantage and pick up the win.

WINNER: Team Progressive Alliance @ 20:00

Colleen Crowder: “YES!  Just like we called it!”

Johnny Suave: “For the second consecutive Extreme Election Night, the Progressive Alliance win the House War Games Match.  This one was very close though.”

Crowder calls it further proof a ‘blue wave’ is taking over PCW.  Suave ignores her.

BACKSTAGE PCW cameras find Charlie Blackwell and ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin laid out on the floor backstage being attended to by Nurse Nellie and the PCW Clean-Up Crew.  Also on hand, ‘Red Solo Cup’ Ray McAvay and the Deplorables.

No sign of Professor McCarthy’s Flock.

More worrying, no sign of PCW Owner Dawn McGill.  One of the Deplorables finds a heel shoe McGill was wearing on the floor and brings it to McAvay.

McAvay asks if anyone’s seen McGill?  The PCW Clean-Up Crew tell him the only people they found were Blackwell and Martin.

McAvay immediately sends the Deplorables out to look for Dawn McGill.

**********************************

MATCH #7/MICHIGAN SENATE MEDALLION MATCH:

Gary Peters (Progressive Alliance) vs. John James (American Patriots)

**********************************

Peters goes right after James. Rights to James. James pushes him down. Peters pops back up. A dropkick to James. James sends Peters out of the ring.

Johnny Suave: “That was a tough fall. Peters is a little shaken up.”

Colleen Crowder: “He’s just giving James false hope.  This one’s in the bag.”

Peters back in.  James hits an Enziguri and beats down Peters a bit. Hangman’s DDT.  Cover.  One.  Two- Peters kicks out.  James runs the ropes from side to side and dropkick’s Peters’s leg! Peters hobbles into a single leg takedown! Cover.  One – TWO!  Again Peters kicks out.  James keeps the pressure on. He goes after the leg with a standing kneebar. Peters endures.  James takes him down again and covers.  One – Two – NO!

Johnny Suave: “Gary Peters stays alive in this match.”

Colleen Crowder: “He’s got John James right where he wants him, Johnny.”

Peters throws a haymaker and rocks James! James returns the favor and throws haymakers right back.  James kicks the bad leg – Peters falls to the mat.  James with a sunset flip – cover.  One – TWO!  Peters survives again.  James stands and takes Peters’s bad leg.  Spin.

Johnny Suave: “FIGURE FOUR LEG LOCK!”

James has it in tight and Peters’s is in a lot of trouble.

Johnny Suave: “THIS COULD BE IT!”

Colleen Crowder: “Nope.  It’s all under control.”

James releases the hold and hooks the leg.

Colleen Crowder: “We’re projecting that Gary Peters is going to WIN this match!”

One.  Two.  TH-

But before James can get to three, Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer and Secretary of State Jocelyn Benson run down and pull the referee out of the ring.

Johnny Suave: “HOLD IT!”

Whitmer sprays mace into the referee’s eyes.  He falls to the floor and is out of commission.

James goes over to the ropes to find out what’s going on.  Bad idea.

Johnny Suave: “HOLY CRAP!  SHE JUST MACED JOHN JAMES!”

James stumbles back and falls over Peters.  Peters immediately rolls him up.

A new referee slides into the ring.

ONETWOTHREE!

Johnny Suave: “QUICK COUNT!”

The referee calls for the bell and then takes off towards the back.

Colleen Crowder: “BLUE WAVE!  BLUE WAVE!”

WINNER: Gary Peters (Progressive Alliance) @ 8:10

Suave can’t believe it.

Johnny Suave: “John James had this match won but Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer and Secretary of State Jocelyn Benson pulled the referee out of the ring.  Whitmer maced the referee, then John James.  Peters rolled up James to get the win.”

Crowder interrupts and informs Suave that the Progressive Alliance are now 2-0 against the American Patriots in the Senate Medallion competition.  Suave no-sells Crowder and corrects her.

Johnny Suave: “With the win, it’s now tied up at two and two for the night.  Mark Kelly and Gary Peters win for the Progressive Alliance.  Lindsey Graham and Tommy Tuberville for the American Patriots.  The Progressive Alliance won a tight House War Games Match.  And now it’s down to our final two matches of the night.  The PCW Women’s Title match.  And the PCW Title match.”

Crowder attempts to cut in but Suave gets a message in his earpiece.   It’s breaking news…

BACKSTAGE Nurse Nellie and the PCW Clean-Up Crew are back at work attending to Ray McAvay.

Johnny Suave: “Dawn McGill is missing.  Charlie Blackwell and ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin were attacked and can’t wrestle now in their matches.  And now Ray McAvay has been taken out.”

Colleen Crowder: “The important thing Johnny is our narrative and our narrative states the Progressive Alliance are doing well tonight- the Donald Trump era of PCW is mercifully coming to an end.”

Quick cut to the American Patriots’ box.

THE AMERICAN PATRIOT BOX The Coke Brothers-Charles and David, financiers and mover and shaker of the American Patriots, and Executive Director of the Lincoln Project Sarah Lenti continue to watch the show from their suite.  The Cokes glance over and meet eyes with…

Quick cut to the Progressive Alliance box.

PROGRESSIVE ALLIANCE BOX…George Moros, big money spender and mover and shaker in the Progressive Alliance.  There’s smiles all the way around.

Johnny Suave: “Well.  The Cokes and Moros seem pleased with the turn of events here.  Too pleased.”

Suave thinks something is definitely up.

A STREET CORNER IN STANSTEAD, QUEBEC Along the banks of the River Tomifobia at the street sign marking the corner of Rue Dufferin and Cordeau and with a large blue sign welcoming people to the province of Quebec in the background, stand Meghan Markle and her bonny Prince Harry.

Meghan Markle: As long as that contemptable Donald Trump is the CEO of the Political Universe, this is as close as I’m going to get to the border of the United States.

Prince Harry: Yes dear.  Whatever you want, dear.

Markle is at least happy that a proper woman will hold the PCW Women’s title after tonight- Kathryn Randall Collins.

Meghan Markle: She’ll be much better than that awful Sierra Whalen.

She adds that KRC’s win will be another shot across the bow to get rid of Trump and allow her to return to Los Angeles- home of the enlightened people.

Prince Harry: If we could could just fly in for a weekend, we could get to see KRC wrestle and-

And that sends the royal into a fit.

Meghan Markle: NO. NOnononononoNO!

Markle hops up and down and screams.

Meghan Markle: I will NOT set foot in that country until that horrible man is out of power.  She turns to Harry who sighs.

Prince Harry: Whatever she wants- she gets.

Cut back to the broadcast desk…

Johnny Suave: Well, I’ll give her credit for sticking to her guns and actually staying out of the country – unlike the other celebs who swore up and down they were going to leave the country and didn’t.

Colleen Crowder: It’s not fair.  If Donald Trump would just go away, Meghan Markle could finally come home.

Johnny Suave: Well, there’s another reason to hope Donald Trump prevails in 2020.

Colleen Crowder: JOHNNY!

The entrance music of Sierra Whalen comes on and the Alaskan Rogue appears.

‘Alaskan Rogue’ Sierra Whalen AGE: 29 / HT: 5’ 9” WT: 120 / HOME: Palmer, AK FIN: Eskimo Pieface

Johnny Suave: “KRC versus Sierra Whalen.  It’s time for our first main event of the night.  The PCW Women’s Title match.”

Whalen makes her way down towards the ring.

KRC comes out next.

Kathryn Randall Collins “KRC” AGE: 37 / HT: 5′ 11″ WT: 145 / HOME: Ft. Myers, FL FIN: Gogoplata

Colleen Crowder: I agree wholeheartedly with Meghan Markle.  If there’s any justice in this world, that little inbred redneck will not get a sniff of a chance to win the belt.  Kathryn Randall Collins is a proper role model for women and we believe she will win.

The national media has also arrived at ringside: CNN, ABC, CBS, NBC, PBS, MSNBC, Fox News, One America News, and NewsMax.  Immediately, the ‘traditional’ news outlets (CNN, ABC, CBS, NBC, PBS, and MSNBC) object to OAN and NewsMax being at ringside and there’s a lot of back and forth chirping between the two sides.

The referee is ready to go and the match begins.

**********************************

MAIN EVENT #1/PCW WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH:

Kathryn Randall Collins (Progressive Alliance) vs. ‘Alaskan Rogue’ Sierra Whalen (American Patriots)

**********************************

Johnny Suave: “This is for the PCW Women’s title!”

KRC and Whalen eye each other as they slowly meet at the center.  Lock up.  Whalen looks to have gained the advantage but KRC swiftly takes an arm wringer.  Whalen reverses – KRC reverses back – Whalen reverses and shoves KRC away.  We start over.  The crowd buzzes as again KRC and Whalen glare at each other.  They circle.  Lock up – Whalen takes a chop from Parker. Whalen returns the favor.  KRC feints a chop and drives a thrust kick into the chest of Whalen.  Whalen down – cover.  One – two – Whalen shoots the shoulder up and rolls out of the ring.  KRC paces back and forth impatiently.

ABC’s Martha Raddatz and Jon Karl immediately grab Whalen and throw her back into the ring.

Johnny Suave: “And there’s our impartial, independent media at work again.”

Colleen Crowder: “They’re just doing their job Johnny.”

Lock up.  KRC takes control.  Belly to back suplex.  Collins then hits three rolling gutwrench suplexes in a row.  Cover.  One – two – Whalen kicks out.

Suave thinks that was a ‘fast count.’

Colleen Crowder: “That was a perfect count.”

Whalen slowly climbs back to her feet.  KRC waves her towards her – Whalen swipes at KRC.  KRC boots Whalen again!  KRC rocks Whalen with an uppercut – another uppercut.  She runs the ropes and eats a shoulder block from Whalen.  Whalen covers.  One…………two…….. KRC kicks out.

Johnny Suave: “Okay.  That count seemed to be a little on the slow side.”

Colleen Crowder: “All these complaints about the counts.  Gosh Johnny, it’s like you want Sierra Whalen to win.”

Johnny Suave: “Actually Colleen, it’s glaringly evident to everyone with the IQ of a brick that you want KRC to win.”

Crowder goes indignant but the match continues.

KRC takes Whalen to the ropes and drags her head across the ropes.  She backs up and throws another haymaker.  KRC runs the ropes – Whalen backdrops KRC and then follows with a snap suplex.  She lays the boots to KRC and drops a leg on her thigh.  Whalen’s elbow connects. KRC pushes back and staggers to get up.  Whalen pushes her backward and rushes in to ram into her against the corner turnbuckle.  Whalen fires off furious fists.  She’s admonished by the referee for using a closed fist.  KRC returns fire and Whalen backs away.  She looks at the referee- the referee shakes his head.

Johnny Suave: “And that wasn’t a closed fist?”

Colleen Crowder: “Stop being so obvious.  You want Whalen to win.”

Whalen launches herself forward and whips KRC into the corner.  Now Whalen charges in – MSNBC’s Joy Reid and Rachel Maddow to the ring apron – THEY PULL KRC OUT OF THE WAY!  *COLLISION*  Whalen slams into the corner turnbuckle and slides down to a seated position.  Now MSNBC’s Brian Williams, CNN’s Chris Cuomo and Anderson Cooper blatantly choke Whalen while the referee is ‘distracted.’

Johnny Suave: “WHAT THE HELL?”

The referee finally puts a stop to the Whalen mugging.  KRC back on offense.  Scoop slam.  Cover.  One-two- Whalen kicks out.  KRC lifts her up- DEATH VALLEY DRIVER TO WHALEN!  Cover.  One-two- Whalen just kicks out.

Johnny Suave: “This match has been turned on its ear by blatant outside interference.”

Colleen Crowder: “That’s simply not true Johnny and shame on you for spreading fake news.  We are now projecting that Kathryn Randall Collins will become the new PCW Women’s Champion.”

Whalen reaches for the ropes but her hand’s about a foot and half away.  She tries to inch closer. Finally, KRC whaps her in the back of the head and pulls her to the middle of the ring.  Whalen tries to kick her way out.  KRC sits on her back and grabs hold of her wrists. She crosses Whalen’s arms under her chin and pulls back on the arms.

Johnny Suave: Straitjacket by KRC and she is in control of this match.

Whalen fights out and tries to pull herself up – KRC collects her and drives her to the mat with a powerbomb.  Whalen hits hard. KRC moves in for the kill.  She hooks the leg.  One–two–THREE!

Crowder nearly jumps out of her chair.  She lets out a loud ‘whoop!’

WINNER AND NEW PCW WOMEN’S CHAMPION: Kathryn Randall Collins (Progressive Alliance) @ 10:04

Johnny Suave: “With an assist from the media, Kathryn Randall Collins of the Progressive Alliance has defeated the American Patriots’ Sierra Whalen and she is the new PCW Women’s Champion!”

While KRC celebrates inside the ring, OAN and NewsMax get into a heated argument with CNN, ABC, CBS, NBC, PBS, MSNBC, and even Fox News over what just happened.

Before Crowder can get started, Suave pre-emptively sends it to a commercial break.

NEW YORK STATE OF MIND New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio stands outside his house to make his plea for Joe Biden to bring PCW to the Empire State- New York.

Bill de Blasio: “Joe.  When you become the new PCW CEO tonight, please think about New York City!”

Johnny Suave: “Business leaving in droves.”

In the background, an endless parade of moving trucks pass by.

De Blasio says with all due respect to California, New York City is a big event city.   He hails New York City as the place where nobody sleeps.

While the Mayor speaks, Harry and Marv of Home Alone fame remove furniture and valuables from de Blasio’s house.

Johnny Suave: “Oh.  And a crime problem, too.”

Bill de Blasio: “New York City is the place to be.”

Several moving trucks honk as they drive past.

Bill de Blasio: “So come on Joe.  Move PCW to the big time.  Move to New York City…”

Harry and Marv remove de Blasio’s watch and steal the keys to his car.

Bill de Blasio: “…so you too can live the New York dream!”

*********************************

Suave begins the pre-match run-up to tonight’s main event by showing highlights from the Progressive Alliance convention.

(VIDEO: PROGRESSIVE ALLIANCE MATCH RESULTS) Deval Patrick, Elizabeth Warren, Joe Biden, Michael Bennet, Andrew Yang, Amy Klobucher, Tom Steyer, Michael Bloomberg, Tulsi Gabbard, John K. Delaney, Bernie Sanders, Pete Buttigleg

Elimination is through being tossed over the top rope.

-Tulsi Gabbard is not allowed into the arena and prevented from participating in the match.

-Delaney and Patrick, Bennet, Steyer, and Yang go really early.

-Klobuchar and Buttgleg put up more of a fight but then they fall away.

Mike Bloomberg labored throughout the match and gets rolled up out of the blue by Elizabeth Warren.  Bloomberg finishes a disappointing fourth.

Warren goes next.  Sanders pins her.

Then it’s down to two- Sanders vs. Biden.

This comes down to Sanders and Biden grappling on the mat.  Sanders rolls him up.

One…

Two…

South Carolina Senator Jim Clyburn, with the blessing of the Progressive Alliance establishment, runs in and rolls Biden on top of Sanders.

One…

Two…

Three!  The referee calls for the bell.

WINNER: Joe Biden @ 19:50

(END VIDEO)

Johnny Suave: “That’s how Joe Biden won his math.  Let’s see how Donald Trump got here as he faced off against Joe Walsh (hint: NOT the guitarist) and William Weld in the American Patriots match at their convention.”

(VIDEO: AMERICAN PATRIOTS MATCH RESULTS) CEO of the Political Universe Donald Trump (R-NY) vs. Joe Walsh (R-IL) vs. William Weld (R-MA)

The bell sounds.

Trump comes out and kicks Walsh in the balls.  DDT by Trump.  Cover.

Walsh is eliminated.  (:12)

Then Weld rushes in.  Trump drop toeholds Weld and he hits the corner turnbuckle.  Cover.

One…two…THREE- Weld’s done. (:25)

WINNER: Donald Trump @ :25

(END VIDEO)

Johnny Suave: “Donald Trump took an easy victory over Joe Walsh and William Weld and now we’ve reached the moment of truth.  Our ring announcer is Kimber Marshall and let’s send it to her now.”

Marshall stands in the middle of the ring.

Kimber Marshall: “Ladies and gentlemen, this match will be…”

Crowd: ONE fall!

Kimber Marshall: “And it will be for the PCW Title!  Introducing first…

Johnny Suave: “Ah.  Bruce Springsteen.  Another one of the many celebs who’ve promised to move out of the US if Trump wins.”

Colleen Crowder: “Don’t you bad mouth ‘The Boss.’  Springsteen speaks the truth.”

Joe Biden comes out with his wife Dr. Jill Biden (and don’t you forget the ‘Dr.’ part).  Behind him is his choice for Aide de Camp Kamala Harris.

Then Marshall announces the Progressive Alliance wrestler taking part in the match.

‘Mr. Hollywood’ Kevin Daniels HT: 6′ 0″ WT: 200 / HOME: Hollywood, CA FIN: The True Hollywood Blockbuster

Daniels comes out and shakes hands with both Bidens and Kamala Harris.

Kimber Marshall: “And their opponent…

The supporters “TRUMP!  TRUMP! TRUMP!” chant merges with the melody of the Imperial March and becomes:

“TRUMP.

TRUMP.

TRUMP.

TRUMP-TRUMP-TRUMMMMP

TRUMP-TRUMP-TRUMMMMP”

Dressed in all black complete with a flowing black cape, Donald Trump and his spokesperson Kayleigh McEnaney walk out on stage to a big ovation from the American Patriots.

Kimber Marshall: Residing in the Trump Tower in the great city of New York, New York!  He promises to…

The Trump supporters shout out: “MAKE PCW GREAT AGAIN!”

Kimber Marshall: Accompanied by his Aide de Camp Mike Pence and representing the American Patriots!  LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!  THE CURRENT CEO OF PCW- DONALD J. TRUMP!

Again, the Trump supporters let loose with thunderous roar that shakes the building.  Trump nods and acknowledges the fans.

Johnny Suave: “Here he is.  The current CEO of PCW.  Donald Trump.”

Colleen Crowder: “Ugh.  And he’s being led to the ring by… her.”

Johnny Suave: “You’re just saying that because Kayleigh McEnaney won’t play the ‘game’ the way you want her to play.”

McEnaney leads the way as Trump, black robe ruffling behind him as he strides, makes his way down the steps from the stage toward the ring followed by Mike Pence and Pence’s wife Karen.

Marshall then announces the American Patriots’s wrestler.

‘Starz N. Stripes’ Kevin Scott HT: 6′ 3″ WT: 250, HOME: Ottumwa, IA FIN: American Stars and Fujiawa Arm Bar

Scott walks out on stage and shakes hands with Trump, Pence, Mrs. Pence.  Then the entourage heads towards the ring.

Johnny Suave: “So here we are.  This is for the PCW title and then we will find out who will be the PCW CEO for the next four years.”

Colleen Crowder: “We already know the answer.  It’s going to be Joe Biden.”

Biden shouts encouragement to Kevin Daniels- but he’s facing the wrong way.  Harris subtly turns him around towards the ring.

Before the match starts, Suave and Crowder are joined by special guests- the CEOs of Twitter and Facebook Jack Dorsey and Mark Zuckerberg.

**********************************

MAIN EVENT #2/PCW TITLE MATCH:

‘Starz N. Stripes’ Kevin Scott w/PCW CEO Donald Trump, Aide de Camp Mike Pence (American Patriots) vs. ‘Mr. Hollywood’ Kevin Daniels w/PCW CEO candidate Joe Biden, Aide de Camp candidate Kamala Harris (Progressive Alliance)

**********************************

The bell sounds and the match begins.

Scott rushes forward.  Daniels side-steps him.  The two men circle.  Scott aggressively comes forward.  Daniels plays defense and makes him chase.   Daniels connects with a spin kick that gives Scott some pause.  Quick lock up – Scott takes a headlock – Daniels slips out.  Scott fires off right and left hands. He follows with a standing spinebuster.  Hooks the leg – one – two – Daniels kicks out and calls a ‘time-out.’  He rolls outside the ring and confers with Biden and Harris.

Johnny Suave: “Kevin Scott off to a fast start here causing Mr. Hollywood to bail out of the ring.”

Jack Dorsey: “Actually Johnny, before you share this content, you might want to know that fact-checking sites, Snope.com, and other media sources have disputed the accuracy of it.”

Colleen Crowder: “Yeah!  Kevin Daniels is probably just getting warmed up and wanted to talk strategy with Joe Biden.”

Once back in, Daniels and Scott tie up – Scott gains control.  He wrenches, hammerlocks, and throws forearms into Daniels’s back.  Headlock by Scott and hits the takeover.  Scott tries to grind Daniels down.   Daniels fights up and around but Scott wrenches the arm again.  Scott takes a wristlock.  Daniels throws a couple body shots.  Surprise roll into a REAR NAKED CHOKE!  Scott elbows out.   Daniels with a drop toehold and gets the legs to hook them.  One – Scott powers out.  Scott goes for a rear bear hug – Daniels fights his way out with elbows.  Daniels backdrops Scott to the mat.  Scott up – Daniels legsweeps him back down.  Cover.  One – two – no.  Scott powers out.

Johnny Suave: “Better from Kevin Daniels there.  He seems to be coming into the match.”

Colleen Crowder: “Johnny, I don’t know what match you’ve been watching but it’s clear Daniels is totally dominating the match.”

Johnny Suave: “That’s debatable.”

Mark Zuckerberg: “Actually Johnny, we’ll allow it.  It’s a factual statement.”

Johnny Suave: “Of course you will.”

Scott nails Daniels with a kick to the jaw.  Cover.  One – two – 2.5 – Daniels just kicks out before the three count.  Scott boots Daniels in the gut.  Daniels drops to a knee – Scott drags him right back up.  He goes to whip Daniels – Daniels reverses and knees Scott low and hard!  Daniels hits the ropes and Scott ducks under.  Another boot to the gut and a Sling Blade takes Daniels down.  Cover.  One – Two – NO! Daniels just gets the shoulder up.

Johnny Suave: “Another close pinfall for Kevin Scott.  He is really doing well here tonight.”

Jack Dorsey: “Again Johnny, before you share something like that, you should know that independent fact checkers dispute its accuracy.”

Johnny Suave: “It’s an opinion Jack that I’m entitled to based on what I’ve witnessed here during the match.”

Mark Zuckerberg: “Once again, what you said is disputed by third party fact checkers.”

Johnny Suave: “*BLEEP* your third-party fact checkers.”

Daniels grows a little frustrated.  He goes to the referee and starts to berate him.  This allows Kamala Harris to sneak into the ring with a steel-folding chair.  She raises it up – Mike Pence runs in- followed by his wife Karen (Pence never eats alone with a woman other than his wife and won’t attend events featuring alcohol without her by his side).  Mike grabs the chair and stops Harris – the chair falls and accidently lands on Harris’s foot.

Colleen Crowder: “MIKE PENCE DID THAT ON PURPOSE!”

Johnny Suave: “Harris was going to hit ‘Starz N. Stripes’ Kevin Scott with that chair.”

Jack Dorsey: “Er.  Independent fact-checkers say that statement contains false information-“

Suave turns off Zuckerberg and Dorsey’s microphone.

Crowder goes ballistic and demands Suave turn their microphones back on.

Johnny Suave: “I guess it really does suck when you get censored, huh.”.

Pence apologizes to Harris for the incident.

Harris kicks him in the groin.

Johnny Suave: “Ooooh.  Apology not accepted.  And Kamala Harris did that on purpose.”

Colleen Crowder: “She did not!  She……….um, slipped.”

Karen Pence then tackles Harris in the ring and both women roll around on the mat.

Johnny Suave: “CAT-FIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!  CAT-FIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!”

Colleen Crowder: “Okay.  That was totally offensive, Johnny.”

Meanwhile, Daniels runs the ropes – Scott ducks a clothesline and waits for him to come back to clock Daniels with a right hand.  Scott blocks a suplex attempt using the power of gravity. Daniels walks into a body slam.  Scott covers.  One – two – 2.999!  Daniels just gets a shoulder off the mat.  Scott CLOBBERS Daniels with a right hand.  Cover.  One – two – THR-THE REFEREE GETS PULLED OUT OF THE RING!

Johnny Suave: “WHAT THE HELL?”

All three members of the Guild of Low Level Media People Trying to Make a Name for Themselves Colleen Crowder- New York Times, Sharon Johns- CNN, and Dan Miller- Washington Post yank the referee out of the ring.

All hell breaks loose.  The media climb into the ring while another referee appears and rolls in under the ropes.

Scott’s trying to figure out what’s going on.  Daniels just gets back to his feet and even he’s wondering what’s happening.

The referee calls for the bell.  He goes to ring announcer Kimber Marshall and tells her what his decision is.

Marshall climbs into the ring and makes the announcement.

WINNER AND NEW PCW MEN’S CHAMPION: ‘Mr. Hollywood’ Kevin Daniels (Progressive Alliance) @ 10:48

Johnny Suave: “WHAT?”

A huge celebration erupts in the ring as Arizona Secretary of State Katie Hobbs, Pennsylvania State Attorney General Josh Shapiro, Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer, Michigan Secretary of State Jocelyn Benson, and former Georgia Gubernatorial candidate Stacey Abrams join Daniels, the Bidens, Harris, Nancy Pelosi, Chuck Schumer, and the Guild of Low Level Media People Trying to Make a Name for Themselves (Crowder-NY Times, Johns-CNN, and Miller-Washington Post).

Outside the ring and around the bar- not so much.  The PCW fans are shocked.  Kevin Scott is stunned at the decision.  Trump is furious and tries to corral the referee but the ref is in the middle of the Progressive Alliance party going on in the ring.

Johnny Suave: “Kevin Daniels has been named the new PCW champion even though he did not pin ‘Starz N. Stripes’ Kevin Scott.”

If the PCW fans didn’t like the Daniels decision, they definitely didn’t like what happened next…

THE DECISION.  TRUMP OR BIDEN? The Coke Brothers (Charles and David), George Moros, Lincoln Project Executive Director Sarah Lenti slowly make their way down to the ring.

Johnny Suave: “HOLY CRAP!”

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Johnny Suave: “The fans have already connected the dots on this one.  Dawn McGill- missing.  The DC Establishment is here.”

The Cokes, Moros, and Lenti have to duck and dodge debris.

Biden stands in front of the big group that’s gathered inside the ring for the announcement.   Donald Trump stands on the outside.

The four climb into the ring.  Moros has a microphone and he doesn’t waste any time.

George Moros: “Joe Biden-“

The Progressive Alliance explode with joy inside the ring.

Johnny Suave: “THAT’S IT!  JOE BIDEN HAS BEEN SELECTED TO BECOME THE NEW CEO OF POLITICAL CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING!”

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Biden looks towards Trump for the traditional post-match handshake- but Trump has already left ringside and headed towards the back.

Johnny Suave: “NO HANDSHAKE.  TRUMP’S GOING TO THE BACK.”

Suave wraps up the show by reviewing the results.

-MATCH #1-Kayleigh McEnaney defeats CNN’s Jake Tapper and Brian Stelter in a handicap match -MATCH #2/ARIZONA SENATE MEDALLION MATCH: Mark Kelly (Progressive Alliance) defeated Martha McSally (American Patriots) -Gavin Newsom (CA-Progressive Alliance) makes a case for PCW to come to California. -MATCH #3/SOUTH CAROLINA SENATE MEDALLION MATCH: Lindsey Graham (American Patriots) defeated Jaime Harrison (Progressive Alliance) -Both Joe Biden and Donald Trump interview with PCW Owner Dawn McGill for the PCW CEO position. -MATCH #4/PCW TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH: Jill Berg Enterprises (Conservative Inc./American Patriots) defeat The Green World Order (Progressive Alliance) and The Deplorables (American Heartland Coalition) -MATCH #5/ALABAMA SENATE MEDALLION MATCH: Tommy Tuberville (American Patriots) defeated Doug Jones (Progressive Alliance) -MATCH #6/HOUSE WAR GAMES MATCH: Progressive Alliance vs. American Patriots -MATCH #7/MICHIGAN SENATE MEDALLION MATCH: Gary Peters (Progressive Alliance) defeated John James (American Patriots) -MAIN EVENT #1/PCW WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH: Kathryn Randall Collins (Progressive Alliance) defeated ‘Alaskan Rogue’ Sierra Whalen (American Patriots) -MAIN EVENT #2/PCW TITLE MATCH: ‘Mr. Hollywood’ Kevin Daniels w/PCW CEO candidate Joe Biden, Aide de Camp candidate Kamala Harris (Progressive Alliance) defeated ‘Starz N. Stripes’ Kevin Scott w/PCW CEO Donald Trump, Aide de Camp Mike Pence (American Patriots) -Joe Biden named the new CEO of PCW.

[‘Trumpet Concerto No. 2 in D major – 3 Allegro assai’ begins to play in the background and P-SPAN quickly cuts away to another political event.]

[nationalpolitic]

Barack Obama Set to Campaign for Kamala Harris in Key Battleground States

Next week, former President Barack Obama will begin a nationwide tour to rally strong grassroots support for Kamala Harris. The campaign will kick off in Pennsylvania, a critical battleground state that could determine the outcome of the 2024 presidential election. According to sources within Harris’s campaign, Obama’s first event will take place in Pittsburgh on Thursday. Obama continues to exert strong influence within the Democratic Party, and many view his presence on the campaign trail as a significant boost for Harris. He will actively target key states in both the Rust Belt and Sun Belt regions, where candidates expect a tightly contested outcome.” Pennsylvania, in particular, holds special importance, as both Harris and her opponent, Donald Trump, are dedicating significant efforts to win over the state’s voters. Donald Trump, who survived an assassination attempt in Butler, Pennsylvania, will return to the state for a rally on Saturday. His campaign continues to highlight the importance of Pennsylvania, which he narrowly lost in the 2020 election. The battle for Pennsylvania remains close, with the latest polling data showing Harris leading Trump by a slim margin of just 0.9 points. Obama’s upcoming tour is expected to energize Democratic voters. His role as a key figure in the campaign underscores Harris’s deep connection to his political legacy. Harris, who supported Obama early in his 2008 presidential bid, has assembled a campaign team that includes several of Barack Obama’s former strategists, such as David Plouffe and Mitch Stewart. This experienced team brings valuable insights and strategies to her campaign as they work to secure a win in the critical battleground states.. These seasoned political figures will focus on mobilizing voters in crucial battleground states, including Pennsylvania. Winning the Latino vote in Pennsylvania could be decisive. Political analysts believe that endorsements from figures like Puerto Rican singer Bad Bunny may have a significant impact on swaying undecided Latino voters. In a state with razor-thin margins, each vote holds immense value. Read the full article