#╽🎭 ⸻ 【perry the platypus】

[inators]

Perry is a photo addict. A celebration of @chio-chan2's art. I love you so much braincell, and I'm proud of how much your art and your blog has grown! Here's to many more years of your art. ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 No I didn't include art from Forever and a Day what do you mean I'm biased

[inators]

From that one prompt that said 'Heinz Doofenshmirtz has died'

The main console nearly bowed to the power of Perry's fists as he slammed them down, chair behind him clattering to the ground from the force at which he stood. He glared up at the screen, murder in his eyes and a ferocious curl to his lip. That was not funny.

Major Monogram and Carl glanced at each other, then back down at Perry with some amount of trepidation. Everyone knew of Perry's less-than-professional connection to Heinz Doofenshmirtz; they just didn't know how deep that connection ever went. "We understand that this might come as a bit of a... shock. We just got the news ourselves."

Perry's fists clenched even harder, if such were possible; his nails dug into his palms as he ground his teeth. Heinz, dead? Impossible. He had just thwarted him yesterday. The resultant explosion from his self-destruct button shouldn't have been near enough to cause serious harm. Not to the most resilient man he knew. Could it be? Did someone finally manage to thwart his nemesis? But that was his job. Who else... What else...?

( If this was Peter's work, he thought savagely, then OWCA would have a rogue agent on its hands in no time flat. )

「Show him to me,」demanded the agent without preamble, his signage snapped out restlessly. He held up a finger when Carl opened his mouth to object.「Now.」

Carl pressed a button. A pneumatic tube appeared next to Perry, which he tried not to hurry into. His mind was still reeling from the news... If it was news. Some elaborate plan, perhaps — or a duplicate, a clone, a doppelgänger of some sort. He'd cloned Perry before. Why not himself? He felt sick. His stomach was tying itself in knots. It was as if his body knew, even if he refused to believe it himself. Don't be dead, Heinz, he prayed, his heart beginning to ache as its beat thundered in his ears. Don't. Don't. Don't.

The morgue was clean in a way that was disturbing even to Perry. Every inch of it gleamed with a sickening promise. I will take him, it whispered as Perry exited the tube. I will take him and tear him apart.

He was so small.

Perry swallowed hard and approached the gurney, his body beginning to shake. Monogram and Carl stood nearby the tube, but he didn't care about his audience just now. Heinz — wonderful, ridiculous, extraordinary Heinz — lay there cold and lifeless. His arms were missing; someone had put them to the side in preparation for the autopsy, he guessed, but it only served to make his nemesis look... Tiny. Frail. Helpless. His fingers danced over his narrow forehead, down his cheek and along his neck where he finally stopped to check for a pulse. He bent, listening for a cough, a breath, anything, but nothing came. His own breath caught in his throat. No. No-no-no.

Ever so slowly, ever so painfully, Perry realized that yes, he was looking at his esteemed beloved cherished nemesis. He could remember every burn, every scar, both pink and grey, old and new. They were all there. Every single mark, every single story, mapped out on the stiff body displayed before him.

Perry choked.

Was he sick, or was that a sob? There was a constriction in his throat that he didn't recognize, and a wetness in his eyes that he refused to name. He breathed hard through his mouth, tried to let the pressure out, but he couldn't. For once, Perry the Platypus couldn't control himself. His fingers clenched on the side of the gurney as he tried and failed to stem his tears, determinedly blinking them away. Heinz wouldn't want him to cry. He would never want Heinz to see him crying. He needed to be the personification of unstoppable, dynamic fury that Heinz knew. For Heinz, he needed to be Agent P.

I never got to tell you, he lamented, and let his fingers trace over Heinz's cheek again. I never got to tell you... but I will show you.

He took one last look at Heinz, not knowing what his expression looked like — not wanting to know what his expression looked like — and turned away, heading back for the tube.

"Agent P — " Monogram tried; but Perry shouldered past him and took the tube back to his lair, where he shouldered his jetpack and headed straight for Doofenshmirtz Evil, Inc. He would find out who did this if it took his last breath.

And they would pay.

[inators]

💥 𝐂𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐊 𝐓𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃: Catalysis 💥 𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒: Say That We'll Be Nemeses (Oneshots) 💥 𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆: M 💥 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: Perryshmirtz 💥 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: Dubious Consent... sort of. 💥 𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖 𝐌𝐄 𝐎𝐍 𝐗 for more updates! 💥 Need me even faster? 𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 𝐌𝐄 𝐎𝐍 𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐃!

⚠️ 𝙳𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝚒𝚗𝚟𝚒𝚝𝚎𝚜 𝚖𝚊𝚢 𝚋𝚎 𝐑𝐄𝐉𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝚒𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚍𝚞𝚌𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏 𝚏𝚒𝚛𝚜𝚝 (𝚟𝚒𝚊 𝙰𝙾𝟹, 𝚝𝚞𝚖𝚋𝚕𝚛, 𝚇, 𝚎𝚝𝚌.) ⚠️ 🙏🏼 𝚆𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝 fic 𝐅𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑? 𝙰 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝚖𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚟𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚖𝚎, 𝚒𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚋𝚎 𝚜𝚘 𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚍! 🙏🏼

[inators]

         𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐈𝐍 𝐅𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑 of 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐘𝐓𝐈𝐙𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍     Lovingly posted with permission from @chio-chan2. (click 'PEREGRIN FLETCHER' for full character sheet)

[inators]

Weeping over the fact that @chio-chan2 was kind enough to draw this as a present for my birthday (June 29). I love you much braincell, thank you so much for a year of good times. Here's to many more!

[inators]

            𝐒𝐀𝐘 𝖙𝖍𝖆𝖙 𝐖𝐄'𝐋𝐋 𝐁𝐄 𝓷𝓮𝓶𝓮𝓼𝓮𝓼

                                   𝙰 𝙿𝙴𝚁𝚁𝚈𝚂𝙷𝙼𝙸𝚁𝚃𝚉 𝙼𝙾𝙾𝙳𝙱𝙾𝙰𝚁𝙳

[inators]

𝐈'𝐌 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐘𝐎𝐔 by Owl City. A Perryshmirtz AMV.

[inators]

New dash icon.

Art credit to @chio-chan2, as always ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

Of course I had to use fanart of Pros. Lmao.

[inators]

Forever and a Day

By: Lex Rating: T Words: 6700 Chapters: 1/4 Pairings: Perryshmirtz, Linda/Lawrence, various Warnings: Perry talks a bit. If you can't handle it, dni. Some violence. Homophobia. Affiliations: @chio-chan2artbox The dichotomy of good and evil are forever intertwined -- just as Perry and Heinz will be, as soon as they exchange their rings.

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Obligatory wedding fic, chaptered. May finish the second chapter before Valentine's Day or not -- but for now, enjoy the preparation. :)

[inators]

Two phone case arts I designed for a couple people who I won't name because they'll probably want to show them off themselves. <3

( With full permission from @chio-chan2artbox )

[inators]

PROSELYTIZATION: Final Chapter

Commence (v): to begin; start. The end.

By: Lex Rating: M Words: 9,380  Chapters: 14/14 Pairings: Perryshmirtz Warnings: Shmoop

[inators]

💥 𝐂𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐊 𝐓𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃: A Bad Case of Loving You / ch. 2 💥 𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒: One Call Away 💥 𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆: T 💥 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: Perryshmirtz 💥 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: Shmoop 💥 𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖 𝐌𝐄 𝐎𝐍 𝐗 for more updates! 💥 Need me even faster? 𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 𝐌𝐄 𝐎𝐍 𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐃!

⚠️ 𝙳𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝚒𝚗𝚟𝚒𝚝𝚎𝚜 𝚖𝚊𝚢 𝚋𝚎 𝐑𝐄𝐉𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝚒𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚍𝚞𝚌𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏 𝚏𝚒𝚛𝚜𝚝 (𝚟𝚒𝚊 𝙰𝙾𝟹, 𝚝𝚞𝚖𝚋𝚕𝚛, 𝚇, 𝚎𝚝𝚌.) ⚠️

🙏🏼 𝚆𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝐅𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑? 𝙰 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝚖𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚟𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚖𝚎, 𝚒𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚋𝚎 𝚜𝚘 𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚍! 🙏🏼

Random aside: 👀 666th post is my hospital schmoop lmao.

[inators]

By: Lex Rating: M Words: 7.7K Chapters: 13/14 Pairings: Perryshmirtz Warnings: Medical things

[inators]

Can we pleaaaaaaase see a little of the next proselitiztion chapter? Pleeeeeease

The instruments around the monitor beeped as he watched the screen. He couldn't see anything substantial -- only Heinz and Lawrence, sometimes, at a strange angle that he thought might be how they'd look if he laid on his back. The rest of the time, he was staring at an unpleasantly white ceiling, the blankness an unwelcome reminder of his time in the dark. Where there was nothing. No one. Not even...

"Stay with me."

Perry bent to one knee and accepted the little Heinz into his arms, rubbing his back in comfort. He still couldn't feel anything -- not the fabric of his clothes, or the touch of his skin, or even the cold metal of the workstation he'd taken to standing in front of. But that was alright. It was alright as long as he got to hold Heinz in his arms; as long as he was there protecting him, caring after him, loving him, he knew everything would work out.

So long as he had Heinz, the world was good.

They pulled away from each other and smiled, foreheads pressed together for but a moment before Perry put him aside to watch the screen again. He couldn't hear anything, but he could tell that Heinz was talking -- his mouth was moving, and he looked a little agitated. Perry frowned, scratching the back of his head. He'd tried buttons, levers, switches and dials, none of which had enabled him to communicate with anyone on the other side of the broadcast. Frankly, it was rather irritating.

He tried a different combination of buttons this time, and got no reaction from it other than a delayed buzzing response. Heaving a sigh, he lowered himself into the chair in front of the console and stared. Why couldn't he reach Heinz, or Lawrence, or anyone? Why couldn't they hear or see him, and for that matter, how had it happened? All these questions nagged at him as he continued to stare at the whiteness, unable to come up with a solution for the time being.

He would just have to wait.

-- Excerpt from "Proselytization", chapter 13.

[inators]

Sometimes, love is unkind. Sequel to 'Lucubration'. For @chio-chan2's birthday!

By: Lex Rating: M Words: 7,334 Chapters: 1/3 Pairings: Perryshmirtz Warnings: Intense gore and violence

[inators]

           𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐄𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐔𝐀 𝐅𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐀

                                        𝑶𝒖𝒓 𝑯𝒆𝒓𝒐𝒆𝒔